Submission to One Another - Wives to Husbands (5:22-24)

Introduction:

As we continue in Paul’s epistle to the Ephesian Christians, we learned last week in our Instructions on Holy Living - Part 2 from Ephesians 5:15-21, that Holy living is one that is constantly filled and controlled by the Holy Spirit, and the evidence of this is submission to one another.

This morning, and the next 3 weeks, we will be begin to unpack what this submission looks like in the various relationships that God has called us to. So we start this morning in our instructions to Submission to One Another, with what the scriptures says about how Wives are to submit to their Husbands, in Ephesians 5:22-24.

Text: Ephesians 5:22-24

Ephesians 5:22–24 ESV

22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.

Main Idea: Since God has established the institution of marriage from the beginning, he has also established the hierarchy in the institution of marriage.

Background:

God is the one who instituted marriage, not man…

Genesis 2:18–24 ESV

18 Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” 19 Now out of the ground the Lord God had formed every beast of the field and every bird of the heavens and brought them to the man to see what he would call them. And whatever the man called every living creature, that was its name. 20 The man gave names to all livestock and to the birds of the heavens and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him. 21 So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. 22 And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. 23 Then the man said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.” 24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

Since God established marriage, and by created order has given man the headship, why do we need to be reminded about this hierarchy? It’s because of the fall:

Genesis 3:16 ESV

16 To the woman he said, “I will surely multiply your pain in childbearing; in pain you shall bring forth children. Your desire shall be contrary to your husband, but he shall rule over you.”

From that time to this, we see women seeking to usurp the leadership of the man, and we see men retaliating in anger and godlessness. There is only one answer to the battle of the sexes and that is to get back to God’s ordained plan of submission in the relationship roles.

I. Command to Submit (22)

A. Exclusive Submission

(22a) Wives, submit to your own husbands,

submit to - is not in the Greek but is inferred through this section regarding submission to one another. Remember where we left off last week:

Ephesians 5:21 ESV

21 submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.

Also, Colossians has a parallel passage which does contain the word submit (hypotasso)

Colossians 3:18 ESV

18 Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.

to your own husbands - note that this submission is exclusive to your own husband and not to every man. How so, and to what degree should this submission be directed?

B. Directed Submission

(22b) as to the Lord.

as (hos [conjunction of comparison]) - in comparison to your submission…

to the Lord - a wife’s submission to her husband is in direct proportion to her submission to Christ. It’s as if Paul is saying, if you have trouble submitting to your husband, then you have trouble submitting to Christ. Christ is the direct focus for all submission! But why should she do this?

II. Explanation for Submission (23)

In order for us to understand the unique and wonderful relationship that Christ has for his people, Paul uses an analogy of Christ and his church.

This is especially significant since the life blood of his church, begins in the granularity of our homes. The church is made up of families, and if we learn to submit to one another there, we as the church will be submitting to Christ in the community of his church.

A. Necessity of Headship

In every institution, there are leaders who are called to oversee that institution’s operation and survival. Someone must take the responsibility for what happens and answer to the board of directors. In the family and the church, this leadership is called headship.

(23a) For - let me explain says Paul…

(23b) the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body,

the husband is the head of the wife - In the institution of marriage’s oneness, headship does not mean superiority but a God ordained role within this oneness. The same is in the oneness of the Godhead, though the persons of the trinity are equally all powerful, all knowing, all present, eternal, and of the exact same essence, there, nonetheless exists a hierarchy:

God the Father: originates and plans

God the Son: eternally begotten of the Father, submits to his Father and carries out his plan

God the Holy Spirit: who proceeds from the Father and Son, submits to them and carries out their wills

There exists no competition within the Godhead as each carries our their roles in unity, and thus there is to be this same voluntary submission, without competition, of the wife to the headship of the husband as she understands that this is a God appointed role. BTW, we will see next week what the husband’s submission looks like with regard to his wife…he has 3x’s more verses assigned to him!

even as - like unto

Christ is the head of the church, his body - the example here for us to follow and focus is the headship of Christ for his church. Notice here, that we are constantly drawn back to this standard. It’s as if Paul is wanting us to understand what he is saying here without question, without argument, without manipulation, the role of the husband’s headship in the family. So, if that is the case, what is the…

B. Purpose of Headship

(23c) and is himself its Savior. - Jesus Christ, without a doubt, and without argument is the savior of his church. We know that he shed his blood to redeem the church, but how does that relate to the roles of husband and wife? I believe it means that as Jesus Christ is our eternal, spiritual savior, husband’s are to be their wives here and now, physical savior. More about that next week, but it will suffice to say right now that the husband has been called to provide and protect his wife and to keep her from harm. I believe, as we will see next week, that he is called to be her Spiritual leader as well. Thus, the wife, is called to understand that role, and voluntarily submit to him. Paul next wants us to truly understand this so he drills down and reiterates it as a:

III. Model of Submission (24)

A. Church to Christ

(24a) Now as the church submits to Christ,

Now - Conjunction declaring that since this is the case that wives are to voluntarily submit to the husbands headship, let’s show the model of how that is to work:

as the church submits to Christ - this is reference to the true church

The submission of the church to Christ is to be voluntary, wholehearted, sincere, and enthusiastic.

It is a submission prompted not only by a conviction that it is right and proper because God demands it, but also by love in return for Christ’s love (1 John 4:19, “19 We love because he first loved us.” ). Thus, Paul says, this love can best be demonstrated by:

B. Wives to Husbands

(24b) so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.

so also wives should submit in everything -

so (houtos [adverb] - in the way indicated) also (kai [adveb] - likewise) - do this same thing in like manner

wives should submit - Let the same be true with respect to the submission of wives to their husbands. Moreover, that obedience must not be partial, so that the wife obeys her husband when her wishes happen to coincide with her own, but complete, as he says:

in everything - This little phrase must, however, is not be interpreted as if it meant “absolutely everything.” If the husband should demand her to do things contrary to the moral and spiritual principles established by God himself, submission would be wrong (Acts 5:29, “29 But Peter and the apostles answered, “We must obey God rather than men.”). With this exception, however, her obedience should be complete.

to their husbands - Again, we circle back from verse 22, and are reminded that this submission is to be done to their own husbands

So What?

Do we see that submission is ordained by God and shows that we are walking in the light and controlled by the Holy Spirit?

Do you wives, understand that by voluntarily submitting to the headship of your husband, you are submitting to Christ, and understand your God given role?

Do you wives, understand that as you submit to your husband, you are part of the display of how the church is to submit to Christ?