Jacob & Esau: Sibling Rivalry

Intro

I didn’t always get along with my brother growing up

Talk about sitting separately, Aub being peacekeeper, Mark knowing how to push my buttons

As much as my parents had to navigate, this was likely nothing compared to what Isaac and Rebekah had to deal with

As Isaac’s story continues, we see how sibling rivalry changes the course of the family; and how poor parenting was largely to blame

The Story

Isaac’s father Abraham passed away, leaving the promise of God in his hands

There was an (old, familiar) problem: Isaac’s wife Rebekah was barren

Not again!

While we don’t get as many details as Abraham and Sarah’s struggles, Isaac and Rebekah need to wait 20 years before they conceive

During this time, Scripture simply says, “And Isaac prayed to the Lord for his wife”

It is hard to wait! It is okay to ask (persistently)

And when the Lord chooses to grant this prayer (as he did for Isaac and Rebekah), it is okay to celebrate!

Share when Nick and Danielle dedicated Elizabeth

Be careful what you ask God for! He answered Isaac and Rebekah… and gave them twins!

The two children struggled in the womb, causing their mother distress

Rebekah’s response is an incomplete Hebrew phrase; “If this is so, why me?” In other words, “Why am I enduring this?”

Must have been fairly uncomfortable and worrisome; not an easy pregnancy

She took her question to the Lord, who gave her an unexpected response

Read Genesis 25:23.

It is a prophecy; these two boys would father 2 nations who would constantly be rivals; but the older shall serve the younger

At the right time, the twins are born

And when it came time to name them, Isaac and Rebekah used some clever Hebrew wordplay; they used puns!

Ham it up and share a few puns from “Punderdome”

The firstborn came out “red, all his body like a hairy cloak, so they called his name Esau”

Awww, you gave birth to a beautifuly baby… sasquatch?!

Red = gives Esau his other name: Edom (see Gen. 25:30)

This was the name of the nation of his descendants

Hair = se’ar = mountains of Seir (where the Edomites would call home)

The secondborn came holding onto Esau’s heel (presumably not looking like a sasquatch)

“Jacob” has the same consonants as “heel” in Hebrew

Name often means “may God protect”; can also be understood as “he grabs the heel” or “deceiver”

As you read about Jacob’s life, all 3 ring true

Not only do the twin boys look different, but they grow into different types of men

Esau is a man’s man: He loves to be outside, hunting and cooking game

Brawn over brains

Jacob is a momma’s boy: He loves to be inside, quiet and very clever

Brains over brawn

This led to natural favourite between the 2 parents

Isaac loved Esau because he brought him meat to eat (adds up)

Rebekah loved Jacob

Unfortunately, the parents did not even bother to hide their natural affinity; they quite openly played favourites… and this led to significant harm in the family

The Dangers of Favouritism

Predictably, parenting from favouritism did NOT go well

At the end of Genesis 25 we see Esau sell Jacob his birthright for a pot of stew

More about their sibling rivalry, setting the table for later

In Genesis 27 we see Rebekah help Jacob (her favourite) deceive her husband Isaac into giving him the blessing designed for the eldest son

Rebekah dressed Jacob in Esau’s clothes, put goat skins on his arms and neck to appear hairy like a sasquatch (I mean, Esau)

Worked since Isaac at this time was very old and blind

It worked! Jacob received the blessing of the firstborn, but not without dire consequences

When Esau returned and found out about Rebekah and Jacob’s deception, he is LIVID, and promises to kill Jacob

Jacob was forced to flee, and the family was broken for many years

Favouritism is destructive in our relationships

Do you have a favourite child? Of course you do! Just, don’t say it out loud

I mean, I have a favourite, I’m just not telling you.

There is a difference between having a favourite and playing favourites

We will always have special and unique connections with a few people

Spouses, close friends, parent/child, nieces and nephews, etc.

This isn’t a problem!

The problem occurs when we give preferential treatment to those we appreciate the most

Having friends in church vs. using my position to put my friends in valuable positions

Oversee a group of people at work and always give preferred tasks and perks to those in your “inner circle”

Like Isaac and Rebekah, shamelessly dote on the child you love most at the expense of the others

The probelm is that favouritism breeds rivalries

By elevating someone over another, you introduce anger and jealousy; others will resent you, but mostly resent the “favourites”

Why I won’t play favourites in church; it is bad for relationships

If you are a boss who has a group of favourites, their coworkers will become suspicious and hostile towards the select group

If you elevate one child above the others, you invite sibling rivalry

Just like Jacob and Esau… and Joseph with all his brothers

You think Jacob would have learned, but nope!

Only God Can Play Favourites

We can’t play favourites because we don’t have perfect judgement

We are limited, flawed and biased

God has no such limitations; only God can play favourites.

And much of the story of Scripture is just so!

Look at Abraham and Isaac’s story: God is choosing His own (favourite) people to bless

This was exclusive; it came at the expense of other nations; it was God’s sovereign choice

When Paul begins to describe God’s sovereign choice in Romans 9, he uses Isaac’s story to lay the groundwork

Cf. Romans 9:6-13.

Not speaking of Jacob and Esau personally, but their descendants

In His sovereignty, God chose Israel (Jacob) over Edom (Esau) and all other nations

Paul goes on to continue to describe how God exercises His sovereignty today (He is the potter and we are the clay)

Uncomfortable, right?

The Gospel is Anti-Favouritism

This is not the entirety of the story of Scripture, or Paul’s argument

Yes, God made a covenant and CHOSE Abraham (favouritism)

But He chose him with the purpose that through this covenant, “all the families of the earth shall be blessed” (Gen. 12:3).

As Paul said, God’s choosing of Jacob over Esau was so that “God’s purpose of election might continue” (Rom. 9:11)

This purpose continued and found it’s fulfillment in Jesus Christ, where the cross changed everything as Jesus suffered and died for us

The Gospel of Jesus is anti-favouritism; it is the exact opposite

Cf. John 3:16-18.

God gave us His only Son

Favouritism would never have allowed Jesus to come down to our level

God sent His only Son to die on the cross

Favouritism would never have allowed Jesus to suffer unjustly

God did this all, not to condemn, but to save the world (those lost in darkness and hostile to Him)

Favouritism would have left us condemned and in darkness

So as we seek to live Gospel-centred lives, we need to view all people with the perspective of God:

ALL people are loved by God, to the point where He is willing to sacrifice His one and only son

There is no favouritism greater than that love

Therefore, no one is worth more or less than the shed blood of Jesus Christ

Let us treat the world with the respect that Jesus’ love demands

Pray