The Funeral of Alan Merlin Schafer

§ Words of Welcome

Good morning, and welcome. On behalf of the family, I want to thank you for being here. We’re here today to honor and reflect on the life of Alan Merlin Schafer. As a son, a brother, a husband, a dad, an uncle, a grandfather, a Sunday School teacher, and a hard worker, Alan left a legacy for each one of us to remember and follow. And it’s good for us to pause today to do just that: to reflect. To remember.

I want to encourage you to give yourself the time you need today. Slow down and be honest with yourself. Mourn, process, grieve, laugh, reflect, and sit in whatever you are feeling. There is indeed a time for everything under the sun: A time to weep, and a time to laugh. A time to mourn, and a time to dance. Even a time to be born, and a time to die. And I pray that the Lord will comfort us as we process Alan’s passing today.

§ Prayer

So, as we begin this time of remembrance and celebration, please join me in a word of prayer.

Eternal God, our heavenly Father, who rules over all things and love us with an everlasting love, we come to you today confessing that we are a needy people; in need of your forgiveness, and today, in need of your comfort. We pray that in your goodness, and for the sake of your Son Jesus, you might enable us to remember Alan’s life, to celebrate his legacy and testimony, and to receive the comfort that you offer us in Your Word and by Your Spirit. Draw near to us this morning we pray in Jesus’ name. Amen.

§ Scripture (John Jindra)

Motion to John

[On the day that Alan passed away, a dear friend was sitting by the side of his bed reading Scripture to him. And at the time of his passing, this friend, John Jindra, was reading out of the Gospel of John, Chapter 14, and I wanted to share that Scripture with you all. Starting in verse one, Jesus is talking with His disciples just before He was betrayed unto death, and He said,

John 14:1–3 “Do not let your heart be troubled; believe in God, believe also in Me. In My Father’s house are many dwelling places; if it were not so, I would have told you; for I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself, that where I am, there you may be also” (LSB).]

§ Song (Sheltered in the arms of God)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ioJ5Ev2l6oQ

Play song

§ Eulogy Alan Merlin Schafer was 94 years old when he passed away peacefully at Lifecare in Elyria on January 7, 2024. Alan was born to Arthur Adam Schafer and Ruth Maybell Fye on October 27, 1929, in Oberlin, Ohio. He had a happy childhood on the family farm in Wellington, Ohio. His childhood was spent playing in the creek behind his home, helping his parents on the farm, and playing Pinochle with many close friends. He would often recount his many happy memories with anyone who would take the time to listen. He and his parents left the farm in 1955 to live in Kipton, Ohio. He married Charlotte Lenore Howser shortly after that, on June 1, 1956, and raised three boys: Alan Leonard Schafer, Michael David Schafer, and Charles Marc Schafer. In his younger years, Alan played the guitar in many dance bands in the early 1950s, where at one of them, he met a girl from Grafton, Ohio, whom he later married. He came to know the Lord in 1955 at LaGrange First Baptist Church, where he was a member and fourth-grade Sunday School teacher until 1965, when he and three other families joined to form Oberlin Calvary Baptist Church in Oberlin, Ohio. He always made it a habit to be involved in the church, come rain or shine, and has passed that legacy on to his children. In 1981, Alan and Charlotte moved from Kipton, Ohio, to Elyria, where he made his home until July 2021, when he went to live in Lifecare with his wife, Charlotte, due to their declining health. After leaving the farm, Alan got a job at Ridge Tool Company in 1956, retiring in 1991 after 35 years of service. He was affectionately known as “Peanuts” at the shop, working first as a fireman, then in the assembly department. Everyone he worked for commented on his work ethic and honesty on the job. Alan was a man of integrity who passed that legacy to his three sons. He was a devoted husband, caring for his wife, who suffered from chronic migraine headaches for many years, never wavering from his marriage vows to care for her in sickness and in health. He was a model of faithfulness to all who knew him. Alan was preceeded in death by his father, Arthur Schafer, in 1965; his mother, Ruth, in 1971; a sister, Evelyn Schafer More, in 1990; a brother-in-law, Alex More, in 2002; a nephew, John More, in 2014; and a daughter-in-law, Donna Sue Porter Schafer in 2018. He is survived by his wife of 67 years, Charlotte; sons Alan Leonard Schafer of Grafton, Ohio, Michael David Schafer (Lisa) of Summersville, WV, and Charles Marc Schafer (Sharon), of Mountain Home, ID; three grandchildren, Kelly, Nikole, and Courtney, one step-grandson, Michael Scott, two great-grandchildren, and many nieces and nephews.

Alan was a great man. I have so enjoyed the time I had in the last few months to get to know him through the stories that his family members shared with me at his bedside.

As a father, he accomplished what every man should strive after. He faithfully led, provided for, and protected his family. Through each of the jobs he held, he was a faithful and hard worker—never missing a day, never getting laid off. He put his family first, working diligently to give them a good life. As one family member recalled, “they could’ve had more, but they never went without.” And that was a testiment to Alan’s persistent sacrifice as the breadwinner.

But even at that, Alan also was a sensitive father. I was told that one year during Christmas, since money was tight, Alan and his wife Charlotte had decided to forego buying a Christmas tree. But then, seeing how it affected his children, Alan immediately shifted course, and went out and got one. He paid attention to his kids, and he was willing to sacrifice so that they would know that he loved them. He was a selfless, caring, good-hearted man, and as a result, his sons have shared with me that they wouldn’t trade their childhood for the world. Alan always said that he had the best kids, and remained interested in them into their adulthood. From living on the farm, to eating sugared cereal, to constructing church buildings by hand, to running a church-bus ministry out of their family volkswagon beetle, Alan led his family well.

And even though Alan didn’t amass a great fortune during his career, it’s clear to me that he passed on the most important things. He enjoyed serving his family, and sharing with them about the faith that he found in Christ all those years ago. On more than one occasion, he dropped into the house of a nearby relative just to clean the house (and maybe to take a nap in their bed!). He was always looking to fill a need, and would do anything for anyone. He would hardly let his kids leave the house without a gift box in hand to provide to their friends and loved ones upon arrival. I was also told he often sat the young ones down to listen to him as he read out of the Bible, in spite of their constant protests. I guess he wanted them to come to know the Lord that walked with him and talked with him in those pages. In all, Alan lived what he taught. He taught his family to do what was right, and they knew what to do was because they saw him living it day in and day out.

For my part, I felt that I also got to know Alan in the months leading up to his death. You see, men are not known by their highest mountains, but how they respond to their deepest valleys. And late in his life, Alan began to struggle with a deep depression. And even though he lived a wonderful Christian life, like many of us, he had moments of doubt. When I would go and visit him, Alan was calmed and comforted by old hymns that sang of God’s faithfulness. I’ll always remember one night in particular when I went in to sing and pray with Alan at his bedside, he was feeling a sense of doubt. After sharing some Scripture with him, I asked if he wanted to pray with me, and without saying anything, he set out in some of the most fervent prayer I’ve ever heard. He clung to me, and I realized in that moment that even though it was me he was clinging to in the body, it was his Savior that he was clinging to in the Spirit. We prayed, we sang, and we cried together that night, and he fell asleep in peace.

But there is plenty more to share, and so we’re going to hear from some of those who knew Alan best, starting with his oldest son.

§ Memories and Stories

Alan *come up after the obituary* (and setting up the video)

Video

Shaphan reading letter from Mark

Open the floor to anyone who would like to share *Find two people other than those who are listed who are willing and ready to share.

§ Message

We’ve heard already so many stories and memories; and the sweetness of the memories can make the pain of loss more pronounced. We loved Alan, and so our hearts ache at the loss that his death means for us. But in times of grief and sorrow, we find that the Scriptures contain many words of comfort, some of which we’ve already heard this morning. Through them God speaks to us directly and brings healing to the pain we experience at the loss of those we love.

2 Corinthians 5:1–4 “For we know that if the earthly tent we live in is destroyed, we have a building from God, an eternal house in heaven, not built by human hands…For while we are in this tent, we groan and are burdened, because we do not wish to be unclothed but to be clothed instead with our heavenly dwelling, so that what is mortal may be swallowed up by life.”

As a believer, Alan did not go into the dark night of death. Rather, he was swallowed up by the light of life, and he is celebrating that life right now in the presence of Jesus and all his glory.

One of my favorite moments as I prepared for this day was hearing about Alan’s involvement in church, and his love for reading and teaching the Bible. His Bibles are out in the lobby today, and I had the opportunity to leaf through them and see all the highlights. Alan didn’t just read the Bible; he dug into the Bible. He walked with God in those pages. And I believe that if Alan was here today, he would want to hand every one of us a Bible and invite us to know the Savior that he got to know in these pages. In addition to all the things we’ve heard today, Alan was a man who walked with God, and who believed he heard from God as well.

In this room we might not all agree about the Bible that Alan loved to read, or about the Savior that he trusted in. But we can all agree that whatever is out there, on January 7th, at around 3:00 PM, Alan found out. Just seconds after he died, he came face to face with ultimate reality. And if he could come back and speak with us, I believe there are a few things that he would want us to know.

The first thing is that death is common. The death of those we love forces us to face our own mortality. Death is real. Death is terrible. In the midst of a world that God called “good,” death is not good. And yet every person who has ever lived dies. There’s no guarantee about when it will be, but the Scriptures say that it has been appointed for men to die once, and after this comes the judgment (Hebrews 9:27). God made us to be precious to one another. And Alan was a precious gift to many of us. And when we’re separated by death there’s an ache left in us, pointing us to the fact that this is not the way it should be. Even though we’re grateful that Alan is no longer struggling or in pain, it’s like that pain gets passed along to us to carry for a little while.

And actually, that ache that we feel is the tension at the center of the story of all creation. We were created to know and to be known. We were created to belong to God and to each other. But a long time ago, at the beginning of Creation, sin entered into the world through one man named Adam, and death entered the world through sin, and so death spread to all men, because all sinned (Romans 5:13). So not only is death common to all men; but we also find that death is caused. Sin is the cause of all the death, the separation, and the brokenness in our world. And one day, it will be the cause of our death as well.

There’s this book called the Jesus Storybook Bible that I love reading to my kids, and at the beginning when they’re talking about sin coming into the world, they say, “In any other story, it would all be over, and that would have been the end.” And the page ends with a period. No hope; No light; No escape; Just sin and death. And this is where many people believe the story ends. You may be here today, and you may believe that sin and death is the end of the story. But let me read to you what it says next.

Because when you turn the page, the story of creation continues:

“In any other story, it would all be over, and that would have been the end. But not in this Story. God loved his children too much to let the story end there. Even though he knew he would suffer, God had a plan—a magnificent dream. One day, he would get his children back. One day, he would make the world their perfect home again. And one day, he would wipe away every tear from their eyes.

You see, no matter what, in spite of everything, God would love his children—with a Never Stopping, Never Giving Up, Unbreaking, Always and Forever Love. And though they would forget him, and run from him, deep in their hearts, God’s children would miss him always, and long for him—lost children yearning for their home.

And in that moment, God whispered a promise to Adam and Eve: ‘It will not always be so! I will come to rescue you! And when I do, I’m going to do battle against the snake. I’ll get rid of the sin and the dark and the sadness you let in here. I’m coming back for you!’ And he would. One day, God himself would come.”

The stories we tell matter. I read this story to my children for the same reason I believe Alan would want me to read it to you today: Because God did come back! And death may be common to all of us, and death may be what we deserve because of sin, but death has been conquered by the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ. And today and every day, Alan found all of his hope, and all of his comfort in the cross of Jesus Christ. And by His grace, Alan has found his way home.

And so as the Scripture says, “Where, O death, is your victory? Where, O death, is your sting? The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.” Because “the wages of sin may be death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

What is a present reality now for Alan is our great and living hope. And it can be your hope starting today. Like Alan, we will all die. But there’s one man who came back. And if you put your trust in Jesus, sin and death does not have to be the end of your story either. I stand here today knowing I will see Alan again in glory. And I only pray that I’ll see you there too.

PRAYER

Our loving father, we come to you today sensing deeply our loss. We lay up on you today our burden, the pain of death. Yet father, we would pause to give you thanks, thanks for your many blessings in our lives, and the life of our dear departed Alan. Thank you for the blessing of family and loved ones who cared in life and remember in death. Thank you for your grace and for loving us through Jesus Christ Our Lord. And thank you that Alan knew Christ and now enjoys a wonderful home in heaven, under Your wings.

We pray that in your grace, you would minister comfort to those left behind, a comfort that springs from a hope, and a hope that springs from knowing life eternal in Jesus Christ. We pray that we might know the intimacy of your presence, and in your presence, peace. We thank you that you are ever near us and ever able to minister to our deepest hurts. We thank you that you walk with us through this valley in your love. Shed Your love abroad in our hearts today for it is in Jesus name that we pray, amen.

§ Song (Under His Wings)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qeHcf_EtZ6A

§ Closing Remarks

At this time, we will be dismissed by row to come forward and greet the family, and to say a final goodbye to Alan, after which the family would like to invite you to linger for some light refreshments out in the church lobby.

Now may the Lord bless you and keep you,

May He make His face shine upon you.

May He lift His countenance upon you,

And give you peace.