We are Family

SERMON TITLE: We are Family

TEXT: (ESV)

SPEAKER: Josh Hanson

DATE: 1-21-24

TURN MIC ON / WELCOME

As always it’s a joy to be with all of you this weekend at Gateway Church. And there’s one thing I want you to know — and this is true if you’re worshiping with us for the first time or are joining us at our North Main Campus — I want you to know that God loves you and that I love you too.

SERIES INTRO

We’re continuing in our vision series today. If you weren’t here with us a few weeks ago — Matt Heft — one of our elders — kicked off this vision series by introducing our new church mission statement. All of this started about a year ago — when I and the elders began a conversation about God’s vision for Gateway Church. And — this new vision — resulted in the elders taking a look at our mission statement and realizing that it was time for an update — as new vision requires a mission statement that uses supporting language. So that’s what Matt’s sermon was all about and — if you haven’t listened to it — I want to encourage you to go do so.

Now —what I’m about to say is so important that — if you’re new to Gateway or have been here for some time — regardless if you’re a Christian or not — this will give you clarity as to the kind of church that Gateway is aspiring to be. And — this is so important — that I’m repeating this each week int his series.

It begins with this graphic. These four columns represent the key components that drive the life, ministry, and direction of a local church. The first component of a church is the pastor. The second component are its key leaders. The third component of a church is its discipleship process. And the fourth component describes the kind of disciples we hope all of us are becoming here at Gateway.

So component one — the pastor — that’s me — if you’re new to Gateway. Now the Bible has a lot to say about the qualifications, characteristics, and calling of a pastor. There are the characteristics of a pastor found in First Timothy chapter 3. There’s the call to shepherd the flock as found in First Peter chapter five. There’s the mandate to preach the Word — Second Timothy chapter four — as well as the charge to be focused on prayer and the Word as found in Acts chapter six. Those are some examples of my role and responsibilities as your pastor.

‌The next component of a church are the other key leaders in the church. This would include our elders, deacons, staff, and those who serve as Life Group leaders. These key leaders help the pastor move the church along in a certain direction — which leads us to the third component — our discipleship process. Here at Gateway this is our process of Worship, Connect, Serve, and Go — this is how we help you grow as a disciple of Jesus Christ.

Worship is when we gather together to worship our God in a way that’s Gospel-Centered, done with excellence, and is contextual. We connect with each other in Life Groups to discuss how the Bible applies to our lives and to care for one another. We serve each other — the people in our church family — in a variety of ways — from Kidway and youth, to our hospitality and prayer teams, to name a few of the ways you serve each other. And we go into the world by equipping, partnering with, and sending members to proclaim the Good News of Jesus Christ.

‌Are there other ministries we do? Of course. But Worship, Connect, Serve, and Go is our primary way of making disciples here at Gateway.

Now — this series is focused on our vision as a church — and this is where the fourth column comes in — the column labeled “disciple.” In the past, we’ve focused so much on what we want you to do to grow in your faith — our discipleship process — that we failed to clearly communicate to you who we’re wanting all of us disciples to become. Meaning, “what does it mean to be a disciple of Jesus here at Gateway?”

You’ve caught glimpses of what it means to be a disciple through my preaching, the podcast, our conversations with leaders, and so on — but because this component hasn’t been defined like the other three — there’s been some confusion. And this is what I and the elders want to make clear so we all move forward growing as disciples with a clear vision of what we mean by the word “disciple.”

‌And our vision — our spiritual goal for every follower of Jesus here at Gateway — is that we’d be disciples...

‌1. Who are...Word and Spirit Christians.

‌2. Who are…generous.

‌3. Who are...family.

‌4. Who are…disciples who make disciples.

‌5. And who are Kingdom-minded.

And — what we’re doing in this series — is focusing on each one of these characteristics in a sermon to give even greater clarity as to the kinds of disciples of Jesus that we all should be aiming to become together. And — today — we’re going to look at what it means to be a family.

INTRODUCTION

Now — right here at the beginning — I want to acknowledge that we all have very different experiences when it comes to being part of a family. And a caution for all of us is to be aware of how we impose our family experience upon this characteristic of being a disciple at Gateway. For example, none of us have grown up in a perfect family — yours may have been slightly less imperfect than others of us — but none of us have experienced a perfect family. And it’s these imperfections that are easy to impose on a church family. Maybe your family never dealt with disagreements — the unspoken family rule was “don’t disagree with dad” — and any disagreements in your church family — however minor they may be — feels like a betrayal. Or maybe your family prides itself on being critical because — as everyone knows — “complaining is the easier form of conversation.” That can be a difficult habit to not bring into your church family relationships. Or maybe you’ve experienced abuse by a family member making it difficult for your to trust others — you’ve learned to survive by putting walls up between you and others. Those walls — no matter how safe they may make you feel — will be obstacles for you in being part of this church family. Those are just a few examples of what we all are bringing to this big family called Gateway Church. So let’s see what God’s Word has to say about the kind of family I’m hoping that we’ll all work at becoming together.

FAMILY CHARACTERISTICS

So let’s look at what a church family is to be like according to God’s Word. One place to begin is in First Timothy chapter 5. This is Paul’s letter to Timothy who is pastoring the church in Ephesus. Here’s something that Paul mentions relevant to this disciple characteristic. He writes…

1 Timothy 5:1–2 (NLT)

1 Never speak harshly to an older man, but appeal to him respectfully as you would to your own father. Talk to younger men as you would to your own brothers. 2 Treat older women as you would your mother, and treat younger women with all purity as you would your own sisters.

Again — I need to caution all of us about imposing our personal family experiences on Paul’s words to Timothy. Some of our fathers were godly men; others were not. Regardless — in this faith family — what we should all be striving for is to treat men — who are older than us — with a gentleness and respect in our words — in the way we’d speak to our father if he was a godly man. We’re to treat men younger than us as brothers. Be patient with them, instruct them, help them to mature in Christ. This means that the older mean among us need to view themselves as spiritual fathers to the younger men in the congregation. Younger men desire spiritual mentors to help them grow as godly men, husbands, and fathers. Older men — what an opportunity you have — to disciple young men — to pass on the faith to them — to leave a spiritual legacy in the lives of the next generation. This is your role in our faith family.

We’re also told to treat women — who are older than us — like we’d treat our mother. In his second letter to Timothy, Paul says this about Timothy’s mother and grandmother.

2 Timothy 1:5 (NLT)

5 I remember your genuine faith, for you share the faith that first filled your grandmother Lois and your mother, Eunice. And I know that same faith continues strong in you.

This is who Timothy would have in mind — when he read Paul’s words about treating older women like a mother — he would think of Eunice who passed on her faith in Christ to him — what a godly woman. Similar to the opportunity for the men — the older women among us have the opportunity to mentor and disciple the younger women among us. To help them grow as a godly woman, as wives — if they’re married — as mothers — if they have children. An opportunity that only comes with time — so let me encourage you to make the most of the opportunity if this is you. God has blessed you with this opportunity to invest in the next generation of godly women in this faith family.

And we’re to treat women — who are younger than us — as sisters — with complete purity. In an age of church abuse and sex scandals — the church is called to be a family where women are protected and safe — treated with complete purity — a word related to holiness.

Oh how this view of one another would transform us into a godly family! If I’m honest — these verses have done more in shaping my view of the church as a family than any other. It grieves me to see the abuses done by pastors and other leaders in Christian organizations. That the church can be an unsafe place — especially for women and children. And I know that I’m not without sin — none of us are — thus a way we can protect the vulnerable is by submitting ourselves to the authority of God’s Word and become the kind of godly family that God desires us to be.

Here’s another characteristic of being a family that I hope to see grow in us. It comes from Paul’s words to the Christians living in Rome. He writes…

Romans 12:15 (ESV)

15 Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep.

A great example of this is illustrated in a book the staff and elders read a few years ago — we also discussed it on the church podcast — the book is titled The Compelling Community. Here’s a brief excerpt from the book giving examples of Romans 12:15 playing out in a local church. The author writes…

“If my wife and I are unable to get pregnant, we should rejoice when our fellow church member gets pregnant. If I just got a new job, I should weep with my fellow church member who lost his…I’ve seen…[church] members show up for the wedding of another member they don’t actually know that well. You can imagine the conversation with other guests at the reception: “So how do you know Maurice and Tonya?” “We’re members at the same church.” “OK, but how do you know them?” “I guess I don’t that much — but since we go to church together, I wanted to support them by attending their wedding.” “Really? Even though you don’t know them?” (pg 56)

Think of how countercultural being a godly family would be. When someone else gets a promotion and you don’t — it’s countercultural — to rejoice with those who are rejoicing and to weep with those who are weeping — though this is the way of following Jesus. When someone’s getting married in your church family — you celebrate with them — even if you don’t know them that well — simply because they’re part of your church family. And when people are grieving — because of a doctor’s report, or a wayward child, or the death of someone they love — they’ll be surrounded by us — they’re family — and not have loneliness added to their sorrow. But only if we strive together to be a godly family.

Now — understanding this as a characteristic of the disciples we’re making here at Gateway — the kind of disciples we’re all striving to be together — well this will help clarify why we do ministry the way that we do as a church. Families are different from business organizations — and I want your view of our church to be first as that of a family and then — and much later — as an organization. Are there are some organizational activities that we must do? Yes. Budgets, room reservations, we’ve got a staff org chart, and so on…but I want our default position to be that we view each other as a family.

Rarely do you have to make formal plans in order to connect with each other when you’re family. You’re patient with crazy aunts and uncles — why? Because they’re part of the family. You help carry the burdens of those in your family who are suffering. And — families — healthy ones — Christ-centered ones — they love each other. They’re committed to each other. There’s this idea — in a family — of “we before me.” Everyone has a place and a role in the family. Names matter. So do each of our unique stories.

Viewing ourselves as family will change our gatherings when we worship. The person who shows up late or runs out early will feel like an outsider because family members stick around to talk and hangout. Our Life Groups will feel like getting together with family — not a box we check on our calendar. And whether or not someone is in a Life Group will indicate if they’re part of our family or not. We’ll try hard to make you feel welcome but — if you’re not engaged in our discipleship process — you’ll never quite feel like you’re part of our family.

FAMILY EXPECTATIONS

Which is why I want to make something very clear — all are welcome to be part of our family — but know that there are some expectations — some minimum requirements, so to speak — we expect of family members — which shouldn’t be surprising — all families have expectations. Kids — that’s why you’ve got chores. So let’s talk about our family membership expectations.

First, it begins with membership. Guests are always welcome — but to be part of this family membership is required. Membership is where we — the church and you — make this relationship formal. It’s where we covenant — which means we make an agreement together — to commit to our roles in this family. We expect our church members to be engaged in our discipleship process and to be growing towards becoming Word and Spirit Christians, who are generous, who make disciples, who are Kingdom-minded as members of this faith family. We don’t have these expectations of non-members — even if you’re a believer in Jesus — I mean — why should we have family expectations of people who haven’t committed to being part of our local church family?

Now we live in a world that seems to have “commitment-phobia.” In the words of one pastor, “Commitment-phobia is the fear that in promising to do something good we’ll miss out on getting something even better.” For many of us, we hesitate or fail to make commitments because we want to keep our options open in case something better comes along. The bottom line — for many of us — is we don’t want to be tied down.

So, why — in a world that often frowns on commitment — would we ask you to make a formal commitment to it?

That’s a great question! First, we must have a right understanding of the church, and then we can gain insight into why commitment to the church is important. In the New Testament, we see that the church is a local gathering of a group of people who are disciples of Jesus. In the Greek language, a local church is called an assembly of people who are committed to following Jesus together. The Bible also describes the church as the bride of Christ. The church is Jesus’ bride — individually we’re part of the bride, but collectively we are the bride. The same is true for us as God’s temple or the body of Christ and all the other metaphors used in Scripture to describe the church. Individually we’re all part of — but together we are the bride, the temple, the body, and so on.

So — to be a Christian who isn’t a member of a local church — is to be a non-attached member of the body of Christ. You’re a hand not attached to the rest of the body — and that’s weird. Or you’re a stone of the temple but — instead of being attached to the rest of us stones — you’re off on your own. Again, are you really part of the temple if you’re not together with the rest of the stones who are part of the temple? Are you really part of this family if you haven’t made the same commitment the rest of us have?

And I know what some folks will think at this point: But Josh, I’m part of the universal church — so there’s no need for me to be part of a local church. Did you know that the Bible says far more about the local church — and its importance in our lives — than it says about the universal church? Now I don’t want to downplay the beauty that is God’s universal church — but in our independent culture that has commitment-phobia — we should all recognize how vital the local church is in the New Testament.

Did you know that nine of Paul’s letters were written to local churches? His other four letters were written to leaders of a local church. Yup, all of Paul’s letters are written to local churches. It’s believed that Hebrews was written to several local churches in Rome. Peter’s two letters were written to local churches — John’s three letters were as well. And the book of Revelation — also written by John — was written to seven local churches. That’s twenty of the books in the New Testament being written to local churches. So — if you’re not formally committed to a local church — for that’s what membership is — it’s going to be hard for you to put into practice the majority of what you read in the New Testament because it was written for people who were members of a local church.

And this brings us to something important to remember — and that is — membership in a local church is for disciples of Jesus Christ. A disciple is someone who professes Jesus as their Savior and Lord and desires to follow him in obedience. And there are certain beliefs we expect all members of this faith family to hold to — they’re called the Essentials of our Faith. I want to read them to all of us as a reminder of what we all — who are members of this church — believe.

All Scripture is self-attesting, and being Truth requires our unreserved submission in all areas of life. The infallible Word of God — the 66 books of the Old and New Testaments — is a complete and unified witness to God’s redemptive acts culminating in the incarnation of the Living Word, the Lord Jesus Christ. The Bible, uniquely and fully inspired by the Holy Spirit, is the supreme and final authority on all matters on which it speaks. On this sure foundation, we affirm these additional essentials of our faith.

1. We believe in one God, the sovereign Creator and Sustainer of all things, infinitely perfect and eternally existing in three Persons: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. To him be all honor, glory, and praise forever!

2. Jesus Christ, the living Word, became flesh through his miraculous conception by the Holy Spirit and his virgin birth. He who is true God became true man united in one Person forever. He died on the cross a sacrifice for our sins according to the Scriptures. On the third day he arose bodily from the dead, ascended into heaven where, at the right hand of the Majesty on High, he now is our High Priest and Mediator.

3. The Holy Spirit has come to glorify Christ and to apply the saving work of Christ to our hearts. He convicts us of sin and draws us to the Savior, indwelling our hearts. He gives new life to us, empowers and imparts gifts to us for service. He instructs and guides us into all truth, and seals us for the day of redemption.

4. Being estranged from God and condemned by our sinfulness, our salvation is wholly dependent upon the work of God’s free grace. God credits his righteousness to those who put their faith in Christ alone for their salvation, and thereby justifies them in his sight. Only such as are born of the Holy Spirit and receive Jesus Christ become children of God and heirs of eternal life.

5. The true Church is composed of all persons who through saving faith in Jesus Christ and the sanctifying work of the Holy Spirit are united together in the body of Christ. The Church finds her visible yet imperfect expression in local congregations where the Word of God is preached in its purity and the sacraments are administered in their integrity, where scriptural discipline is practiced, and where loving fellowship is maintained. For her perfecting she awaits the return of her Lord.

6. Jesus Christ will come again to the earth personally, visibly, and bodily—to judge the living and the dead, and to consummate history and the eternal plan of God. “Even so, come, Lord Jesus” (Revelation 22:20).

7. The Lord Jesus Christ commands all believers to proclaim the gospel throughout the world and to make disciples of all nations. Obedience to the Great Commission requires total commitment to “him who loved us and gave himself for us.” He calls us to a life of self-denying love and service. “For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them” (Ephesians 2:10).

If you want to learn more about our Essentials of the Faith, I’d encourage you to go listen to episode 165 of our church podcast where we discuss the essentials.

Now — if you’re not a member of Gateway — you may be wondering, “Well how do I become a member?” Great question! You first step is to take our membership class. And it just so happens that registration is open for our next membership class which begins on February 19th. The deadline to register is February 8th — so you still have time to sign up for the next class — which I want to encourage you to do so. Even if you don’t end up becoming a member — I promise you’ll know more about Gateway than you do right now — by attending the class. And you may just find the faith family you’ve been looking for.

BENEFITS OF BEING PART OF THE FAMILY

Now — let’s talk about the benefits of being part of this church family. In addition to some of the benefits we’ve already discovered — having folks to rejoice and weep with you, for example — as members of this church family you have one of Gateway’s elders assigned to you as your shepherding elder. Now — before I explain exactly what that means — here are some passages that explain to us the role of elders in a local church. Peter writes…

1 Peter 5:1–5 (NLT)

1 And now, a word to you who are elders in the churches. I, too, am an elder and a witness to the sufferings of Christ. And I, too, will share in his glory when he is revealed to the whole world. As a fellow elder, I appeal to you: 2 Care for the flock that God has entrusted to you. Watch over it willingly, not grudgingly—not for what you will get out of it, but because you are eager to serve God. 3 Don’t lord it over the people assigned to your care, but lead them by your own good example. 4 And when the Great Shepherd appears, you will receive a crown of never-ending glory and honor. 5 In the same way, you who are younger must accept the authority of the elders. And all of you, dress yourselves in humility as you relate to one another, for “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.”

And the author of Hebrews writes…

Hebrews 13:7 (NLT)

7 Remember your leaders who taught you the word of God. Think of all the good that has come from their lives, and follow the example of their faith.

As well as…

Hebrews 13:17 (NLT)

17 Obey your spiritual leaders, and do what they say. Their work is to watch over your souls, and they are accountable to God. Give them reason to do this with joy and not with sorrow. That would certainly not be for your benefit.

As a member of Gateway Church, you’re assigned an elder who will care for you. Who — in being eager to serve God — will watch over your soul knowing they will give an account to God. They’ll give you an example of how to follow Jesus — of what it means to be a disciple who’s a Word and Spirit Christian, who’s generous, who’s Kingdom-minded — as they disciple and lead you as a member of this family. What an intimate relationship between the members of this family and the elders — the shepherds — called to lead and protect this faith family. If you’re not a member, the elders don’t have responsibility to shepherd and care for you in this way because you’ve not given us the authority to be your shepherds through church membership. And we don’t want to force ourselves — as shepherds — on anyone. Membership is a choice — being part of this faith family — isn’t forced on anyone — it’s a benefit for those who choose to be part of the family.

The folks who are part of my shepherding group could tell you of monthly emails they get from me — keeping them up to date on what’s going on at Gateway and asking them for prayer requests to making sure they know they can come have Thanksgiving lunch with the Hanson family if they’re spending the holiday alone. And folks in Matt Buttermore’s shepherding group got an invitation to spend Thanksgiving with me because Matt forwarded my email to his shepherding group — and he didn’t even tell me! And if that doesn’t let you know that we’re really a family around here I don’t know what will convince you.

Other benefits to becoming a member would include serving opportunities that are reserved for members only. Now — just because you are a member doesn’t necessarily mean you will serve in these ways but — if you’re not a member — you don’t even have the possibility. This would including serving as an elder, or deacon, or as a Life Group leader. These are key roles in our church family so being a member of our family is required.

Finally, one last benefit of church membership — and know that this has been the informal practice for the vast majority of us at Gateway — but recently the elders made the decision to make this more formal — and I’m sharing this so none of us are surprised or caught off guard. Baptism and child dedications are a family benefit. In the book of Acts, the apostle Peter stands up and preaches the first sermon about the resurrection of Jesus to a large crowd. And…

Acts 2:37–39 (NLT)

37 Peter’s words pierced their hearts, and they said to him and to the other apostles, “Brothers, what should we do?” 38 Peter replied, “Each of you must repent of your sins and turn to God, and be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. Then you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. 39 This promise is to you, to your children, and to those far away—all who have been called by the Lord our God.”

Those who believe are to be baptized. A sign of what Christ has done on behalf of all who turn to him in faith — sealed by the Holy Spirit who is given to all who believe — a promise to believers and their children. And some may question, “Well why would connect baptism and child dedications to church membership? They believed and they were baptized — there’s nothing here about their membership in a local church.” And that’s because we haven’t gotten there yet. In verse 41 we read…

Acts 2:41 (NLT)

41 Those who believed what Peter said were baptized and added to the church that day—about 3,000 in all.

Do you know what we just saw? The first church membership rolls being recorded. In the Old Testament we see all kinds of examples of what we’d equate to church membership rolls — all of those lists of names we love to read — but those who believed and were baptized weren’t left to be independent Christians. They weren’t Christians who were members of the universal church only. They were added to the church that very same day. Which church? The church in Jerusalem. A local church who went from around a hundred members to over three thousand on one day. And if the Word of God — which we’re committed to submitting ourselves under its authority — if the Word of God makes it clear that baptism and local church membership were inseparable — well — then we want to keep them inseparable as well. And I know that — just like we all come from different family backgrounds — that there are many different church backgrounds and experiences among us — some of us coming from churches that didn’t even practice membership. But — in this faith family — we see baptism and child dedications as a family benefit. It’s our way of living out Acts 2 — where all who are baptized at Gateway are added to Gateway. Might there be some exceptions that we run into, of course! But we’ll figure those exceptions out as we allow our regular practice to be in the footsteps of the early church as we see in Scripture.

All that to say — if you hear us bring up church membership pretty regularly — know that it’s because membership is your first step in becoming part of our church family.

CONCLUSION

Gateway Church exists to glorify God by making disciples of Jesus Christ. And — specifically — we’re making disciples who are part of a faith family. Who understand what it means to be part of this family — the characteristics and expectations of our family members — and who are also blessed by receiving the benefits of being part of this family. And in a world that’s plagued with loneliness and being unknown, we have the opportunity to display something that’s compelling, intriguing, and alluring — what it means to be a godly family. And many of them will be so curious that we’ll be given the opportunity to invite to join us. Let’s pray.

PRAYER

Heavenly Father, we thank you for adopting us into your family. Though we believe — there’d be no belief if you hadn’t first chosen us to be your children. You created us. You called us out of spiritual darkness and death. You raised us to new life and gave us new family names and new brothers and sisters.

Holy Spirit, give us eyes to see each other as fathers and mothers — as sisters and brothers. With respect and purity — with patience and love. Help us to rejoice with those who are rejoicing and to weep with those who are weeping — to neglect neither — for being a godly family means we’ve been empowered by you to do both.

And — Jesus — to you our Savior, Lord, and Older Brother, thank you for being a faithful Son to our Heavenly Father. Thank you for showing us what it means to be a faithful family member. And thank you for giving your life so that we could be adopted into your heavenly family. If today there’s anyone wondering, “What must I do to be saved?” May they believe in you, Jesus. And we pray all of this in your name. Amen.

BENEDICTION (Prayer teams available / I Believe Now What? resource)

May you go with a commitment to being a member of this faith family. Amen.

God loves you. I love you. You are sent.