Wednesday, January 31, 2024

Ephesians 4:25-32

Tonight, we are going to finish up chapter four of Paul’s letter to the church in Ephesus. In our discussion last week, I presented you with a lots of scripture references in regards to how we as believers should walk differently now that we have received a new nature, a new self.

Tonight, Paul finishes up this similar discussion by talking about how we as believers can be improperly dressed. Now, this is not talking about the clothing we have on, but the actions and the responses in our lives. There are certain pieces of the life of a non-believer that we need to get rid of or remove from our lives.

There are certain times or functions when our dress should be evaluated as being appropriate or not. Being that I’m a male and sometimes don’t see matching clothes well, I have to ask my wife, “Does this look ok?” Sometimes she will say, change the pants, or change the shirt, they don’t match.”

The scripture for tonight tells us the same thing, take that off, put this on, let’s get you appropriately clothed in the Christian life.

Ephesians 4:25-32 (NASB)

25 Therefore, ridding yourselves of falsehood, speak truth each one of you with his neighbor, because we are parts of one another. 26 Be angry, and yet do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, 27 and do not give the devil an opportunity. 28 The one who steals must no longer steal; but rather he must labor, producing with his own hands what is good, so that he will have something to share with the one who has need. 29 Let no unwholesome word come out of your mouth, but if there is any good word for edification according to the need of the moment, say that, so that it will give grace to those who hear. 30 Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. 31 All bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and slander must be removed from you, along with all malice. 32 Be kind to one another, compassionate, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.

Paul gives us

Six things to take off and one thing to put on:

For each of the things we should rid ourselves of, Paul lists alternate actions for our lives.

The first one is found in verse 25,

Ephesians 4:25 (NASB)

25 Therefore, ridding yourselves of falsehood, speak truth each one of you with his neighbor, because we are parts of one another.

I. Strip away the garment of LYING (v 25)

The word that is used here for

- Lying: falsehood, untruthfulness, being deceptive, misrepresenting the truth, or exaggerating the truth.

I had a friend in school who was a habitual liar, but he would never admit to that. He always said that he didn’t tell a lie, he just stretched the truth a little bit. But to stretch the truth or to be intentionally deceptive is the same thing.

- By telling a lie, we do three things.

1. Lying misrepresents the truth or camouflages the truth.

- The person who is lied to has to live and act upon that lie because they don’t know the truth.

This impacts their life. We may see this in some situations as not being a big deal, but it can be very serious.

Someone who lies in a business deal can cause great harm to a business and its profitability. Someone who lies on something like a resume or application can cause great loss to the organization that places their trust in that person who lied.

People will even lie about their salvation stories. They may even embellish the story to make it sound more impressive. That can be extremely costly because it could cost someone their eternal life.

And of course, lying in a relationship, and lying about loving someone to avoid conflict can eventually lead to destructive emotions. So, even a little white lie can have a dramatic impact on someone else’s life.

2. Lying deceives a person.

- A person who lies, deceive someone so that they can get what they want (Selfish)

for themselves at the expense of someone else. They deceive to seduce someone or to cover up something.

- A person who lies, deceives to intentionally harm others.

3. Lying builds the wrong type of relationship.

- A relationship built on lies is a relationship that is built on sinking sand

, it cannot last. Have you ever heard George Strait’s song, “The Chair.” The entire song is about a man who lies to a woman about her sitting in his chair. He does so to pick her up at a bar. At the end of the song, he says, “Oh, and to tell you the truth, that wasn’t my chair at all.” I’ve often thought about that song and the type of relationship that grows when starting with a lie.

Two people cannot live in a strong relationship built on a lie. Lying destroys confidence and security in your partner. Lying makes it extremely difficult to trust someone and be assured that they will tell the truth. Lying destroys relationships.

- The second half of the verse tells us one strong reason to speak the truth, we are members or part of one another.

- We are all part of the Body of Christ, therefore, we must all function on the premise of truth.

- Who we are should be who we are (if that makes sense). We are not to hide or create a pretense for ourselves. We are not to be one person before man and another in private before God.

A. Lying or falsehoods is one of the Ten Commandments. (Exodus 20:16)

Exodus 20:16 (NASB)

16 You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.

B. Lying or falsehoods is one of the gross sins that defile man. (Matthew 15:19)

Matthew 15:19 (NASB)

19 For from the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, unchastity, theft, false witness, blasphemy.

C. Lying or falsehoods takes it stand of the father of lies, Satan. (John 8:44)

John 8:44 (NASB)

44 You belong to your father the devil and you willingly carry out your father’s desires. He was a murderer from the beginning and does not stand in truth, because there is no truth in him. When he tells a lie, he speaks in character, because he is a liar and the father of lies.

D. Lying or falsehoods are associated with idolatry. (Revelation 21:27)

Revelation 21:27 (NASB)

27 and nothing unclean, and no one who practices abomination and lying, shall ever come into it, but only those whose names are written in the Lamb’s book of life.

E. Lying or falsehoods or deceiving men is a characteristic of the antichrist. (2 Thessalonians 2:9)

2 Thessalonians 2:9 (NASB)

9 that is, the one whose coming is in accord with the activity of Satan, with all power and false signs and wonders,

F. Lying or falsehoods are not who we profess to be. (1 John 2:21)

1 John 2:21 (NASB)

21 I have not written to you because you do not know the truth, but because you do know it, and because no lie is of the truth.

II. Strip away the garment of ANGER (v 26-27) (James 1:19, Psalm 37:8)

Ephesians 4:26-27 (NASB)

26 Be angry, and yet do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, 27 and do not give the devil an opportunity.

- Anger is a natural emotion

Here is the interesting thing about this verse, we DO get angry, that is a natural emotion.

- Sometimes anger is called for and justified, and other times it's not.

What we are to do is to guard against those times when it’s not, and our behavior and actions when it is. Anger can cause us to react in such a way that we lash out at others and hurt them, or it can cause us to be motivated to right whatever wrongs have angered us. Let’s look at the

- Two types of anger.

1. Wrong anger – unjustified or selfish anger

A. Anger that broods is selfish.

It harbors anger and will not let go. It seeks and wills revenge. “I will not forget, and I will get even.” “I don’t get mad, I get even.”

B. Anger that holds contempt.

It despises the other person, ridicules them, and arrogantly exalts oneself over that person. It is prideful, and arrogant, and produces wrath. This anger will trample over the other person because they deserve it.

C. Anger that curses and seeks to destroy someone.

This destruction can be his reputation, his business, his family, his lifestyle, or his spiritual state.

2. Righteous anger – justified anger (Romans 12:18, John 2:13-16)

When we think about the

- Injustices and hate in the world, as believers, this SHOULD make us angry.

But righteous anger is always controlled and exercised with discipline.

- Justified anger is NEVER selfish and is ALWAYS purposeful.

- Seeks to right the wrongs and to do so in a peaceful manner.

Romans 12:18 (NASB)

18 If possible, so far as it depends on you, be (live) at peace with all people.

John 2:13-16

13 The Passover of the Jews was near, and Jesus went up to Jerusalem. 14 And within the temple grounds He found those who were selling oxen, sheep, and doves, and the money changers seated at their tables. 15 And He made a whip of cords, and drove them all out of the temple area, with the sheep and the oxen; and He poured out the coins of the money changers and overturned their tables; 16 and to those who were selling the doves He said, “Take these things away from here; stop making My Father’s house a place of business!”

I’ve seen someone say, “Just remember, when you ask the question, ‘What would Jesus do,’ flipping tables and making whips is not out of the question.”

The best way to

- Deal with righteous anger promptly and with love.

Paul writes, “Do not let the sun go down on your anger.” Get it taken care of, and let it go. Some of the best marriage advice I got from my dad was, “Never go to bed angry.” There’s so much truth to that. Take care of what needs to be taken care of, and do not let it leak over to tomorrow. I know some married couples that follow this advice and they haven’t slept for years.

Note at the end of verse 27, Paul says, “Do not give the devil an occasion.”

- Do not allow the devil to sow discord or selfishness into your righteous anger.

This happens when it is not taken care of; when we allow things to fester; we become madder and madder to the point that Satan now can just walk right in the front door.

James 1:19 (NASB)

19 You know this, my beloved brothers and sisters. Now everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger;

Psalm 37:8 (NASB)

8 Cease from anger and abandon wrath; Do not get upset; it leads only to evildoing.

III. Strip away the garment of STEALING (Matthew 6:19-21, Luke 3:13, 1 Timothy 6:17-19)

The word used here for

- Steal: cheat, to take wrongfully from someone either LEGALLY or ILLEGALLY.

The law of the land is not the determining factor in whether someone is stealing or not. Someone can use the law to steal. Someone can take something from someone without breaking the law. Someone can wrongfully store up or horde something keeping it away from someone else who might need it.

Our typical thought on

- Stealing is taking something that belongs to someone else

; that would be one case.

But

- A person can also steal by hoarding more for themselves than what they need or can use.

We can call it whatever we want, but God calls it stealing.

Matthew 6:19-21 (NASB)

19 “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. 20 But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys, and where thieves do not break in or steal; 21 for where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

Luke 3:13 (NASB)

13 And he said to them, “Collect no more than what you have been ordered to.”

1 Timothy 6:17-19 (NASB)

17 Instruct those who are rich in this present world not to be conceited or to set their hope on the uncertainty of riches, but on God, who richly supplies us with all things to enjoy. 18 Instruct them to do good, to be rich in good works, to be generous and ready to share, 19 storing up for themselves the treasure of a good foundation for the future, so that they may take hold of that which is truly life.

IV. Strip away the garment of FILTHY & FOUL TALK (v 29) (Romans 3:13, Matthew 12:34, Psalm 141:3, Ecc 10:12)

Ephesians 4:29 (NASB)

29 Let no unwholesome word come out of your mouth, but if there is any good word for edification according to the need of the moment, say that, so that it will give grace to those who hear.

The word translated here as

- “Unwholesome:” rotten, foul, putrid, or polluting.

Why we may think of this as

- Cursing, foul language, and worthless conversations.

Romans 3:13 (NASB)

13 “Their throat is an open grave, With their tongues they keep deceiving,” “The venom of asps is under their lips”;

Paul compares people with unwholesome talk as an “open grave.” An open grave is foul, offensive, and obscene. This can range from off-colored humor to immoral suggestions.

- A man with a foul mouth stinks like an open grave.

- It kills a person’s character and honor, it is unattractive and offensive.

Matthew 12:34 (NASB)

34 You offspring of vipers, how can you, being evil, express any good things? For the mouth speaks from that which fills the heart.

Instead, the believer should only have speech that is good and wholesome.

- Our words should build up others, share good things, and help others plow through life together.

I’ve mentioned this before, I will say to our kids, before you speak, ask yourself “Is it nice or necessary,” if not, don’t say it.

Psalm 141:3 (NASB)

3 Set a guard, Lord, over my mouth; Keep watch over the door of my lips.

Ecclesiastes 10:12 (NASB)

12 Words from the mouth of a wise person are gracious, while the lips of a fool consume him;

V. Strip away the garment of being CONTRARY or GRIEVING The Holy Spirit (v 30)

Ephesians 4:30 (NASB)

30 Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.

- To grieve the Holy Spirit is to pain, offend, vex, or sadden the Holy Spirit.

EXAMPLE: when our kids act contrary to our commands, they grieve us.

1. This is a forceful command. Paul uses not only the term Holy Spirit but the Holy Spirit of God.

1. Four ways to grieve the Holy Spirit:

A. When believers allow impure things to penetrate their lives or thoughts. (Romans 8:5-7)

Romans 8:5-7 (NASB)

5 For those who are in accord with the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who are in accord with the Spirit, the things of the Spirit. 6 For the mind set on the flesh is death, but the mind set on the Spirit is life and peace, 7 because the mind set on the flesh is hostile toward God; for it does not subject itself to the law of God, for it is not even able to do so,

B. When believers behave immorally. (Romans 8:12-13)

Romans 8:12-13 (NASB)

12 So then, brothers and sisters, we are under obligation, not to the flesh, to live according to the flesh— 13 for if you are living in accord with the flesh, you are going to die; but if by the Spirit you are putting to death the deeds of the body, you will live.

C. When believers act unjustly. (Acts 5:3-4)

Acts 5:3-4 (NASB)

3 But Peter said, “Ananias, why has Satan filled your heart to lie to the Holy Spirit and to keep back some of the proceeds of the land? 4 While it remained unsold, did it not remain your own? And after it was sold, was it not under your control? Why is it that you have conceived this deed in your heart? You have not lied to men, but to God.”

D. When believers participate in anything contrary to the nature of the Holy Spirit. (Romans 8:8-10)

Romans 8:8-10 (NASB)

8 and those who are in the flesh cannot please God.

9 However, you are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God dwells in you. But if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he does not belong to Him. 10 If Christ is in you, though the body is dead because of sin, yet the spirit is alive because of righteousness.

The reason we are told not to grieve the Holy Spirit is because He has sealed us for the day of redemption. (Ephesians 1:13-14)

Ephesians 1:13-14 (NASB)

13 In Him, you also, after listening to the message of truth, the gospel of your salvation—having also believed, you were sealed in Him with the Holy Spirit of the promise, 14 who is a first installment of our inheritance, in regard to the redemption of God’s own possession, to the praise of His glory.

VI. Strip away the garment of UNKINDNESS (v 31)

The last thing we are to strip off is the garment of unkindness.

Ephesians 4:31 (NASB)

31 All bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and slander must be removed from you, along with all malice.

In this last category, Paul gives us a long list of things that are included.

- BITTERNESS is resentment or harshness.

A bitter person is someone

a. Cynical, resentful, cold, unpleasant, and stressful.

We are to be filled with love, joy, and peace; fruit of the Holy Spirit, not bitterness.

Wrath (Proverbs 29:22) is used also in Paul’s letter to the Galatians, but translated as “fits of rage.”

- WRATH is fits of anger; violence; or an explosive temper.

Wrath comes from someone who has a short fuse that is lit by boiling emotions.

Proverbs 29:22 (NASB)

22 An angry person stirs up strife, And a hot-tempered person abounds in wrongdoing.

- ANGER

- We’ve already looked at this one.

- CLAMOR – or brawling: the person who will argue all the time.

They fuss about everything and are always looking for someone to insult or quarrel with.

- SLANDER – or evil speaking. This is to insult someone, to speak maliciously against them.

And finally,

- MALICE. This is also hurtful, slanderous, and injuring speech.

Paul says we are to rid ourselves of all these things, but then we are to robe ourselves in the NEW PERSON.

VII. Put on the garment of the NEW PERSON (v 32)

Ephesians 4:32 (NASB)

32 Be kind to one another, compassionate, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.

This is the opposite of everything we are to take off.

- We are to be KIND (Romans 12:10, Colossians 3:12).

This requires us to

A. Consider others before ourselves.

Romans 12:10 (NASB)

10 Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor,

He says the same thing in the book of Colossians.

Colossians 3:12 (NASB)

12 So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience;

- We are to be COMPASSIONATE.

to someone means to

A. show love, understanding, and tenderness toward others.

We are to be aware of other’s hurts and sufferings and to be concerned for them.

Finally, Paul says to be

- We are to be FORGIVING.

A. To pardon someone for their wrongs against you.

And

B. WHY?

should we be this way (Luke 17:4, Colossians 3:13) because no matter what someone has done to you, you have been forgiven greatly by

- Your Heavenly Father has forgiven you much more.

For even when we were yet sinners, Christ died to forgive our sins and give us eternal life. How much more forgiving should we be toward those who have wronged us in a much smaller way than our sins have wronged God?

Luke 17:4 (NASB)

4 And if he sins against you seven times a day, and returns to you seven times, saying, ‘I repent,’ you shall forgive him.”

Colossians 3:13 (NASB)

13 bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so must you do also.

When looking at these passages, we need to ask ourselves,

CONCLUSION:

- What do I need to take off, and what should I put on.

- Where can I be better as a child of God.