The Urgent Need For Friendship Evangelism
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Explain history of church- talk about being an assistant pastor and scratching our heads on how to be an effective witness in our community. “Why don’t you call around and see what other pastors are doing.”
What are some common methods we use for evangelism today? If I would have called you up and asked, “How are you reaching the unsaved people in Hillsdale?” What would you have said?
16 years ago in Oconomowoc, our situation seemed hopeless. We had a hold the fort mentality.
16 years later- God has graciously allowed me to learn an effective way to reach people with the gospel in our culture in our context— and it is the idea of friendship evangelism.
Highlight Book- Evangelism for the Fainthearted by Floyd Schneider
Floyd introduces this section of the need for friendship evangelism with an example of Jesus.
Again the next day after John stood, and two of his disciples;
And looking upon Jesus as he walked, he saith, Behold the Lamb of God!
And the two disciples heard him speak, and they followed Jesus.
Then Jesus turned, and saw them following, and saith unto them, What seek ye? They said unto him, Rabbi, (which is to say, being interpreted, Master,) where dwellest thou?
He saith unto them, Come and see. They came and saw where he dwelt, and abode with him that day: for it was about the tenth hour.
Floyd says this, “When John the Baptist told two of his disciples that Jesus was the Lamb of God, they asked Jesus where he lived. He answered, “Come and see.” He didn’t whip out the Old Testament and prove to them on-the-spot that he was the Messiah. For three years Jesus demonstrated his messiah-ship through his actions. The disciples came to faith in Christ by observing how he lived as a human being, day and night for two to three years.”
How does the example of Jesus in John 1:39 teach the need for friendship evangelism?
Floyd’s answer: People’s openness to the gospel may occur only through our involvement in their lives.
“Simply putting a welcome mat at the front door of our church building is not enough. We need to become interested in something that they are interested in, for their sake.”
Agree/Disagree?
How is simply becoming interested in something that they are interested in evangelism?
Illustration:
My wife, Christine, demonstrated this principle when she asked Martha, a young university student, if she would help Christine learn German. After a few weeks she began helping Martha with her English. They developed a friendship and met together together weekly for many months. Martha would take no payment for her tutoring, so we made it a habit to invite her for supper each week. During one of these meals, we began talking about the Bible and why we read it. That conversation lasted for three hours.
As she prepared to leave, I asked, “What do you think of us?”
“Well,” she began slowly, “if we had had this conversation eight months ago, when we first met, I would have thought you were both crazy.”
“Are we crazy?” I asked.
Her answer was surprising, “No, I’ve gotten to know you and you’re normal, just like everyone else.”
Discussion:
Contrast friendship evangelism with other methods of evangelism we have used in the past:
Along this same line, a Swiss missionary I know says, “If people get to know you as a nice person and then they discover that you’re a bit odd about religion, they won’t mind. But if all they know about you is that you’re a fanatic about religion, they probably won’t ever make the effort to discover that you’re a nice person.”
What are the main reasons for becoming involved in people’s lives?
1). So people will know we care about them
2). So we can get to know them
And needed not that any should testify of man: for he knew what was in man.
Jesus has a leg up on us. We can’t read hearts, so we need to spend time with our unsaved friends.
How will this help our evangelism efforts? We will be able to understand how they think!
How long can this take?
“This may take a few days or even months of letting them see us live Christianity, before we talk to them about it.”
How can we make friends with our unsaved acquaintances?
Making friends means exhibiting an interest in others. They need to know that you have something in common with them, and that you enjoy spending time with them. This can become fun.
Think of things that you enjoy doing. For example:
✓ Go sailing or fishing or clothes shopping;
✓ Sports – either playing or watching – football, basketball, soccer, etc.;
✓ Clubs – amateur radio, computer, photography, astronomy, a sewing circle;
✓ Sign up for a class at a local college, whether a hobby, craft, or serious study;
✓ Offer to babysit for a mother with young children (or older children –
“Above all, be hospitable! Schedule times to invite unsaved people to your home for a meal, coffee, or for an evening of board games.”
One word of warning: beware of the temptation to view non-Christians as only potential converts, whom you will cast off if they do not get saved.
Why is this such a danger?
It can be easy and enjoyable to make friends, but you will probably have to spend less time with your Christian friends. What are some reasons that your Christian friends may not understand this?
1). We already spend much of our time in the world (example, at work). It is wonderful to gather around believers so we can be refreshed to get back into the fight.
How would you answer this objection?
2). Some Christian circles have built up a false sense of spirituality in which separation from the world means no interaction whatsoever.
Objections:
“How can you go to the student cafeteria to meet her? They serve beer there!”
“How can we invite our neighbors over? They smoke and our house will stink for days!”
“What if they invite me to go somewhere with them, like to a movie that I don’t think I should see? I might offend them if I turn them down.”
“But what if I do go out with a friend, or I am invited over for a meal, and they offer me a beer or a glass of wine?”
“You need to think these questions through ahead of time, so that you are not caught off-guard. Make sure that your convictions are based on Scripture, though, and not upon some unwritten laws of spirituality.”
“It is imperative to get involved in the lives of those we want to reach for the Lord. God did not sit in heaven and demand that we come to him, but he became one of us, yet without sin (Heb. 4:15). We need to “become one of them,” yet without sin.”
For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin.
I wrote unto you in an epistle not to company with fornicators:
Yet not altogether with the fornicators of this world, or with the covetous, or extortioners, or with idolaters; for then must ye needs go out of the world.
“On the contrary, we need to open up our lives and invite an unsaved friend to “come and see” Christianity as we live it every day. This may be hard at first, especially since unbelievers can be very unlike those in our circle of Christian friends.”
Let me close by showing the disposition necessary for every mature believer that can lead successful friendship evangelism.
But we were gentle among you, even as a nurse cherisheth her children:
So being affectionately desirous of you, we were willing to have imparted unto you, not the gospel of God only, but also our own souls, because ye were dear unto us.
For ye remember, brethren, our labour and travail: for labouring night and day, because we would not be chargeable unto any of you, we preached unto you the gospel of God.
Ye are witnesses, and God also, how holily and justly and unblameably we behaved ourselves among you that believe:
As ye know how we exhorted and comforted and charged every one of you, as a father doth his children,
That ye would walk worthy of God, who hath called you unto his kingdom and glory.
Why is all this so critical? Why must you determine to implement this into your life as soon as possible?
Because of vv. 17-20.
But we, brethren, being taken from you for a short time in presence, not in heart, endeavoured the more abundantly to see your face with great desire.
Wherefore we would have come unto you, even I Paul, once and again; but Satan hindered us.
For what is our hope, or joy, or crown of rejoicing? Are not even ye in the presence of our Lord Jesus Christ at his coming?
For ye are our glory and joy.
