Boundaries of Relationships

Introduction

Would you say that rules and boundaries are smart/helpful? Can you imagine a football game with no rules?

Asa vs Parker

Only goal is to make a touchdown

There are no rules

Both of these guys are too kind to show how crazy it could be. Give me 2 football teams with a deep rivalry ______ & _____.

Imagine the chaos between the two teams when there are no rules and boundaries. The team would keep running out of bounds, into the stands with a full on war!

Go ahead and turn in your Bible to Titus 2.

We are going to address the Boundaries of Relationships. Before we get to the passage, I have one more illustration to share.

CUP STACKING

2 Contestants from each section

Be the first to stack the cups according to the picture on the screen

The boundaries you have in your relationship are like a wall around you. They are there to protect you, guard you, secure you. Satan is going to come along and try to tear down your wall of boundaries.

He’s not going to come with a big hammer and knock them all down at once. It will be taking one brick at a time.

The first brick will not be from the foundation.

He’s going to find an easy brick that doesn’t mean much. Then another that’s easy. Before you know it, there is a hole in your wall of boundaries.

One characteristic of satan that many people don’t realize is that he is patient. He can wait for your weakest moment and attack.

Today I want to help build or strengthen your boundaries. The building blocks of your boundaries do not need to be from me. The blocks do not need to say made by Pastor Noah. The building blocks need to say “Made in Christ.”

Let’s read Titus 2:11–15 “11 For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation for all people,

12 training us to renounce ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in the present age,

13 waiting for our blessed hope, the appearing of the glory of our great God and Savior Jesus Christ,

14 who gave himself for us to redeem us from all lawlessness and to purify for himself a people for his own possession who are zealous for good works.

15 Declare these things; exhort and rebuke with all authority. Let no one disregard you.”

LET”S PRAY TOGETHER

Foundation of Boundaries are Built on Salvation

What good are walls without a foundation? The plastic cups that were up here had no foundation and they were knocked over with no problem.

Think about the large sky scrapers. They have deep foundations full of steel, rock, and concrete. What are your foundations built on?

Whether you are in a relationship or not, it is vital you start building your boundaries. You need to set where you can fully honor God in a relationship. The foundation is the most important! The foundation is Christ’s salvation.

Do you currently have a relationship? Are both of you FOUNDED on Christ?

Have you thought about your future relationship? Are you going to ensure both of you are founded on Christ? HOW DO YOU KNOW SALVATION IS THE FOUNDATION?

~VS. 11 “grace of God appeared … training us to renounce…” The grace of God has given us salvation to build the boundaries in verse 12. It starts with salvation.

Before you build a boundary YOU MUST KNOW THAT YOU ARE SAVED and THEN KNOW THE OTHER IS SAVED. Without Christ, that relationship is a sinking ship.

Listen to these words of Christ: Matthew 7:24–27 24 “Everyone then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock. 25 And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock.

26 And everyone who hears these words of mine and does not do them will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand. 27 And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell, and great was the fall of it.”

Where is the foundation for your boundaries? Do not rely on the other person’s boundaries to hold for both of you. You need your foundation for your boundaries. You need Christ as the foundation and build on Him. ~~As you build your foundation on Christ, know that…↓

Building Boundaries are Active

I don’t always share about the original language of the Bible during the sermon, but it is very important to me when I study. I want to share today.

The word “training” in Greek is “paideuo” and it is present tense and an active verb. That is very important for us. Since the verb is present tense and active, that tells us that we are to be actively training right now! Building Boundaries are Active!

It is the grace of God that is actively training us. It is training us in 2 specific ways:

RENOUNCE

~ Renounce ungodliness and worldly passions. In our flesh, we want to forget every boundary that was up and enjoy the sin. Christ calls every one of you to renounce ungodliness and worldly passions. A strong definition for renounce is “declare one's abandonment.” What do you need to abandon today so that you can build strong boundaries in your life?

LIVE

~Live self-controlled, upright, and godly. Building boundaries involves removing obstacles and then it calls to build up by living it out. Want to know the strongest boundary? One that is built on a strong foundation and regularly maintained. We maintain strong boundaries by living it out daily.

Building boundaries are active. When you build boundaries for your relationships, you are setting up your current or future relationship to honor God. What better person to honor in your relationship, than the one who is the creator of relationships?!?

As you build your foundation on Christ, know that building boundaries are active. As you build, notice that boundaries are anticipation.

Building Boundaries are Strengthened by Anticipation

We saw that the foundation is salvation. Then building boundaries are anticipation for Christ. The first relationship in all of history was Adam & Eve. They were created to worship God and have a relationship with Him. Scripture records that the sinless relationship between God and man was broken when Adam and Eve sinned. God still longs for that relationship. He calls men and women to come together and build a relationship that honors Him. Every relationship is to be ready/anticipate the coming of Christ.

Imagine your relationship, both of you are running after Jesus and living a full life for Him. The boundaries you have placed in your life will be strengthened because you are longing for the day of His return!

Closing

Do you have any boundaries built in your relationship?

Do you need to prepare some boundaries in your life today?

The boundaries you have in your relationship are like a wall around you. They are there to protect you, guard you, secure you. Satan is going to come along and try to tear down your wall of boundaries. One characteristic of satan that many people don’t realize is that he is patient. He can wait for your weakest moment and attack.

The first question you need to ask yourself, “is Christ your foundation?” Not focusing on the relationship. Just you!

Second, are you actively building boundaries for your your current or future relationship? This will mean renouncing sin and any bad habits. It also calls for bold living for Christ!

Your boundaries can always be strengthened when you live waiting for Jesus. This is a common saying but carries deep truth - “The health of your relationship should be so God honoring that Jesus could show up on a date and you not fear what He might bring up.” Think about Adam and Eve when they sinned. They went and hid from God. COME TO GOD - (vs 11) - for the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation to all people.