No Greater Love
Notes
Transcript
Handout
Introduction
Introduction
What is love?
When most people think about love, they tend to dwell on romantic love between a husband and wife or a significant other.
This is especially true today. . . for today is the popular holiday of valentines day. . . the day in which “love is in the air” and those who have a “significant other” are supposed to show their love and appreciation for one another.
But is love only for those in a romantic relationship? Is this how the Bible defines love?
If we want a proper definition of love, we must start with God, for Scripture testifies that God himself is love, and love flows from his very being.
Some verses that clearly describe how love originates and flows from God are found in 1 John 4:7-12. . .
Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love. In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; if we love one another, God abides in us and his love is perfected in us.
So, this passage clearly tells us where we should get our understanding of the definition of love and how we should also love others.
But, tonight, I want us to press in on a form of love that has been neglected both in our culture and even in the church. . . and that is the love that we should have between friends.
A good friend is hard to come by. . . and today it seems that we are only concerned with having a romantic love with the opposite sex as opposed to brotherly love with close friends.
But if we read the Bible, especially the New Testament, we will find that when the word “love” is used it refers more often not to the romantic love a husband and wife share. . . but to the love we should show to one another. . . to our friends. . . to our brothers and sisters in Christ. . . to our neighbor.
Now, let me make a clarification. I am not downplaying marriage and the beauty of the romantic love a husband has with his wife. The Bible hold’s marriage very high and it is a picture of Christ’s relationship with his church to help us to see how much Jesus loves us.
However, as 1 Corinthians 7 teaches, singleness is also very important and is a good gift along with marriage.
All of us are will go through seasons of singleness (both before marriage, after one’s spouse dies, or for some, their entire earthy life) and most of us will go through a season of marriage. . . but all of us are called to practice biblical friendship and love our brothers and sisters in Christ for the entirety of our lives. . . regardless if we are married or single.
So, if the Bible upholds love between friends so high and mentions it much more than romantic love, why have we as Christians neglected to be friends with one another?
Why can’t we find good friends? Why are we often hurt by one another and do not love others as we love ourselves?
I think the reason for our truncated view of love stems from us using the world as our example of how to love and experience being loved by others. . .
But instead, tonight, I want to offer a different approach. . . when it comes to love. . . instead of taking our cues from the world, we need to take our cues from the word made flesh. . . and the example Jesus set for us in the way he loved his friends.
Key Point: By trusting in the self-sacrificial love of Jesus, we will have the grace to self-sacrificially love others in our friendships.
The Self-Sacrificial Love of Jesus: John 15:12-17.
The Self-Sacrificial Love of Jesus: John 15:12-17.
During the upper room discourse in John 13-16, Jesus gives his final instructions and admonitions to his disciples.
In John 15:12-17, Jesus gives his followers “his commandment”. . . to love one another as he has loved them.
But how has he loved them? He gives the answer in verse 13. . .
Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.
Jesus defines the greatest love one can show to a friend is by laying down his life for them.
So, love for our friends should be characterized by self-sacrificial love that is championed by Jesus who gave his life for us.
The definition of the love we are to have with our friends is ultimately a picture of the gospel. . .
Rebecca McLaughlin says, “Jesus’ linking of deep friendship love to His own sacrifice for us means friendship is a vehicle of the gospel. . . Friendship is a vehicle for the gospel in the sense that its cross-shaped: formed for life laid down in love for others, just as Jesus laid down his own life for us.”
Therefore, it is through looking to the example of Jesus’ self-sacrificial love on the cross for us that we can have the grace to give this same self-sacrificial love to others.
What do your friendships look like right now? Are they characterized by the self-sacrificial love of Jesus or by self-promoting pride of Satan?
Sacrificial love is the definition of true biblical friendship.
So what are some aspects of this self-sacrificial love that is displayed through biblical friendship?
Show me your friends and I will show you your future.
1 Corinthians 15:33. . . “bad company corrupts good morals.”
To have good friends, you must be a good friend.
True friends serve one another.
Jesus demonstrated this in chapter 13 when he washed his disciples’ feet.
He was willing to humble himself to the lowest task of washing the feet of his friends.
Another example of self-sacrificial service can be seen in the life of Paul in his willingness to suffer on behalf of the saints in Ephesus.
True friends encourage one another.
Jesus constantly encouraged his disciples.
John 16:33. . . “take courage for I have overcome the world.”
John 6:20. . . “It is I, do not be afraid.”
Jesus was also lovingly warned his disciples and spoke truth into their lives.
Luke 12:1. . . “beware of the leaven of the pharisees.”
John 8:24. . . “if you do not believe that I am he, you will die in your sins”
Paul was also constantly encouraging and building up his brothers and sisters in Christ.
1 Thessalonians 5:11. . . “encourage and build one another up in love.”
Paul was willing to go back to the cities where he was stoned just to encourage the elders of the churches where he planted.
Proverbs 27:17. . . “Iron sharpens Iron, as one man sharpens another.”
Ephesians 4:25. . . we must lay aside falsehood and speak truth to our neighbor, FOR we are members of one another.
If true friends encourage one another. . . lift them up. . . this also means that they do not tear one another down with their words.
Ephesians 4:29–31 “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice.”
True friends pray for one another.
Jesus prayed for us in John 17 and intercedes for us daily before the Father as our great high priest.
In every letter Paul wrote he discussed how he constantly was remembering the church in his prayers.
Ephesians 1:15–16 “For this reason, because I have heard of your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love toward all the saints, I do not cease to give thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers,”
In fact, he even says to the Corinthians after listing all the ways he was persecuted for the faith that he has “the daily pressure and anxiety on him from all the churches” in his prayers for them.
When was the last time you were so concerned over a friends walk with Jesus that the amount of time you prayed for them brought pressure and anxiety in your life?
True friends spend time with one another.
For three years, Jesus spent each day simply living life with his disciples.
There were many instances that he invited Peter, James, and John to take part in special events in Jesus’ ministry.
Brent Crowe says, “True friends prioritize presence over productivity.”
True friends trust one another.
True friends make themselves vulnerable with one another.
Notice what Jesus says in John 15:15. . .
No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you.
Jesus no longer calls the disciples his servants. . . but calls them his friends. . . and the reason he calls them friends is because he does not hide anything from them.
Instead, he says that all the Father has told him he has revealed to them.
Jesus had an intimate relationship with his disciples. Jesus KNEW his disciples and his disciples KNEW him.
Paul also speaks of the intimacy he shared with his brothers and sisters in Christ.
He calls Onesimus his “very heart” (Philemon 1:12).
He says he cares for the Thessalonians like a mother cares for their young. . . and that he has not only shared the gospel with them but “his very life” because they have become so dear to him (1 Thess. 2:8).
Consider the intimacy the Son has with the Father and Spirit in the Godhead. There is perfect unity.
Being made in the image of God, we were also created for that same community, not only with God but with one another.
Therefore, for us to truly live the life God intended when he created us. . . we MUST pursue intimate, personal, and intentional community with others.
How many people do you do this with? How many people truly KNOW you?
Followers vs. Friends. . . Explain
How many people know the specific places where you are susceptible to temptation?
How many people know the responsibilities that tend to overwhelm you?
How many people know the idols that war on the turf of your heart?
How many people know the secrets of your past that still haunt you?
How many people know the places where you try to find substitute identities?
How many people know the reasons why you might doubt the goodness and power of God?
The answers to these questions will tell you how many friends you really have.
True friends love the least of these and even their enemies.
“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven. For he makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? And if you greet only your brothers, what more are you doing than others? Do not even the Gentiles do the same? You therefore must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect.
Do you only love those who love you?
Think about some people you know in your school who no one wants to be around. . .
Think about some people in the student ministry who may be neglected or left out of the circle. . .
True friendships are not transactional. . . it is not about what you can get from the person but what you can give to the person.
Seek to be friends with all people. . . especially those who are often left out.
True friends apologize to and forgive one another.
Ephesians 4:32 calls us to be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another just as God in Christ forgave us.
Have you hurt anyone with your words? Repent and Apologize.
Have you been hurt by anyone? Forgive them.
So to summarize. . . all of these characteristics of Biblical friendship can be summarized in following the example of the sacrificial love of Christ.
To Be a Friend, You Must First Have a Friend
To Be a Friend, You Must First Have a Friend
The only we can have the strength to love others and be true friends in the way Christ has loved us. . . is if we have experienced his love and become his friends through repentance and faith.