Pastor Michael's Testimony

Introduction:

Tonight is a really exciting night for me.

Tonight, I am sharing my testimony with you.

And some of you might be thinking, “wait, didn’t he share his testimony with us when he first got here?”

“And hasn’t he brought up aspects from his testimony on a frequent basis?

Which yes, that is technically true, but that was just a quick Cliff Notes version for you.

Tonight we are going to get into the weeds of it all.

I’m gonna put everything on the table, and we are going to talk about it.

I think that this is important for you to hear, because it is important for us as Christians to share our lives, struggles, and stories with each other.

I want to let you in; to let you get to know me better, and to tell you all of the ways that God has been faithful in my life

And read, set… go!

Body:

I grew up in a Christian home with my parents and older brother.

When I was around 1 year old or so, I ran into some developmental issues

I had been doing fine up until this point, but suddenly, I went from talking a lot to not talking at all.

I would also have a meltdown whenever there were bright lights or anything like that, so my parents really couldn’t take me anywhere.

I also was having really severe stomach issues at the time.

And with the help of some doctors, they put me on a gluten free diet;

My stomach issues cleared up, along with a lot of the other symptoms, and we never really thought much about it again until much later.

When I was around 5, I asked my mom about what it meant to be a Christian.

My mom began to share the Gospel with me.

And she explained everything accurately:

How God created us and loves us

How our sin separates us from God

How Jesus came to bring us back to God by dying on the cross for our sins and rising from the grave three days later.

And how we can go to Heaven to be with God when we die by giving our hearts to Jesus.

Then my mom prayed a prayer of salvation with me.

But this wasn’t when I truly gave my life to the Lord.

When I was around seven, we started going to a church called Osborne Baptist Church

Shortly after this, I started going to Awana at this church and began to memorize my first verses.

Life was great!

But unfortunately, it was around this time that my parents began to openly argue a lot, and my dad got kicked out of the house

My dad had been unfaithful.

Like it would be for any kid, this experience was really hard for me to go through.

It was during this time that a life-long struggle of mine began; anxiety.

I began to feel so anxious, overwhelmed, and depressed during this time that I wasn’t able to get through a school day on many occasions.

But I was able to get some help through counseling, writing in a journal, and being prescribed medication.

But I did still struggle with anxiety even after that.

It was around this time that I thought back to when I had prayed that prayer of salvation with my mom.

And I just felt far from God.

But I remembered what my mom had said about God, how he loves me, and wants me to have a relationship with him.

So that night, I got on my knees in my room, and I prayed a prayer.

I knew that only God could provide the stability and structure that my heart craved.

I didn’t know this passage at the time, but as I think back to this moment, I think of the last part of Romans 8.

Romans 8:38–39 ESV

38 For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, 39 nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

When I gave my life to the Lord, he secured my in the palm of His hand that night

And I knew that my life was forever changed.

Fast forward a little bit, and my parents got back together.

They are still together to this day.

A couple of years later, and I am old enough to be in youth group

I LOVED being a part of a youth group

Eventually, I began to play guitar and sing at church

This was the first time that I had ever really served in the church, had any leadership opportunities, or anything like that.

It was a really formative experience; I don’t think that I would be where I am at today without this.

Eventually and I graduated from high school.

My best friend Luke goes off to Liberty University, but I decide to stay home and go to community college first.

After my first full year of community college, I had the opportunity to go and work for a Centrikid camp in Kentucky over the summer.

I was going to be playing in the worship band with Luke and some friends he met at college.

So that’s what I was looking forward to the most; getting to jam with my friends all summer long.

But one of my other responsibilities was teaching a Bible study for 3rd graders.

And I enjoyed doing that more than anything else that I had ever done in my entire life.

It was through this context that the Lord began to call my heart into ministry.

Around that time, Acts 20:24 became one of my life verses:

Acts 20:24 ESV

24 But I do not account my life of any value nor as precious to myself, if only I may finish my course and the ministry that I received from the Lord Jesus, to testify to the gospel of the grace of God.

This is my mission that God wants me to accomplish through church ministry.

And this is the mission that God wants you to accomplish, too; regardless of what your career ends up being!

I worked camp for a couple of more Summers (transitioning from Centrikid to FUGE), and then I finished my associate’s degree and transferred to Liberty, where I majored in Biblical Studies before getting to work on my Master of Divinity.

But there was something else that was a priority at this time other than my education; dating.

I wanted to find a girlfriend really, REALLY bad.

And other than one unhealthy relationship in high school, nothing ever worked out.

The entire time that I was at Liberty, my heart was broken several times.

I went on some first dates; sometimes, I didn’t even make it that far.

A couple of them had second dates, but nothing really ever lasted longer than that.

I was finding my identity in this; I felt pretty worthless at this time.

I would go through this stuff, and my friends would always tell me, “It’s okay. God loves you; find your identity in that.”

And I was really struggling at this time, because, I knew that God loved me, but my thought process at the time was, “well, yeah, of course God loves me; He loves everybody.”

The fact that God’s love is universal made it feel like God’s love wasn’t super personal at the time.

But over time, I realized that God’s love really is personal.

Here is a parable that comes to mind when I think of this:

Luke 15:3–7 ESV

3 So he told them this parable: 4 “What man of you, having a hundred sheep, if he has lost one of them, does not leave the ninety-nine in the open country, and go after the one that is lost, until he finds it? 5 And when he has found it, he lays it on his shoulders, rejoicing. 6 And when he comes home, he calls together his friends and his neighbors, saying to them, ‘Rejoice with me, for I have found my sheep that was lost.’ 7 Just so, I tell you, there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance.

I can identify with this; Jesus left the 99 to find “me.”

He does love me personally.

And he loves you personally, too.

He left the 99 to find you.

Don’t ever forget that.

Fast forward a few years, and I end up being a part time interim youth pastor at a church in Lynchburg.

There had been some massive moral failures at the church; it was a really difficult situation.

But I felt called to it.

Me taking this job led to me going on a church mission trip to Guatemala, which is where I met Samie.

She was there for the Summer with a group of Spanish students from Liberty, doing her Spanish internship.

She was assigned to our group as a translator.

I felt like I connected with her more than anybody that I had ever chatted with in my life.

You see, I have always found it difficult to connect with people

Navigating conversations is really hard for me.

I had a few really close friends, but beyond that I found it difficult to connect.

This is especially true when it comes to the world of dating.

But with Samie, it felt different.

Samie ended up getting sick and having to go to the hospital, so I never got a chance to say goodbye while I was still in Guatemala.

I thought I would never see her again.

But then I found her on Facebook.

I was so happy; so I sent her a friend request, and after she accepted it, she messaged me!

It was all up-hill from there.

Once we both got back to Liberty for the semester, we went on a few dates and made things official in August of 2019.

But there was something difficult that happened shortly after this.

You see, the situation at my church hadn’t gotten much better.

My position was terminated along with several others.

This was obviously really hard; this was the first church I ever worked at.

And suddenly, I needed another job, and fast.

I ended up getting a janitorial job at Liberty.

And you know what department of facilities I was responsible for cleaning? The athletic buildings.

And if you’ve ever seen me try to do anything athletic, you’d know that this is hilarious.

I have always really struggled with physical motor skills.

In the Summer of 2020, while on vacation with my family, Samie and I got engaged!

It was really awesome.

And there was something else really exciting that happened earlier that day.

A random church near Richmond that I had never heard of called me.

They were looking for a full-time youth pastor.

This was really exciting, and I applied for the position immediately.

It felt like, on that day, God was setting the stage for my and Samie’s life together.

The process of interviewing with that church lasted a couple of months, but eventually everything worked out and I put in my 2 weeks notice at my janitor job.

This was really exciting, as this would be my first ever full time job in ministry.

I moved up there in September of 2020 by myself.

And then we got married at the church in November of that same year!

Everything was coming together.

I loved my wife and I loved my job.

Things were off to a really great start.

After being therefor over a year, though, I began to notice some red flags in the leadership.

Ater this became a pattern, Samie and I made the difficult decision for me to start applying to other churches.

I began having conversations with several, with one of our top prospects being here at Ebenezer.

But then, the pastor at the church in Richmond told me that he was going to resign.

And the Sunday eventually came for him to give the announcement.

It was the Sunday that he was to announce that he was resigning.

He provokes an emotional response from the congregation.

And he eventually says, “well, I’ll reconsider and let you know in a couple of Sundays.”

“But if you’re with me, I need you to be with me… so stand if you’re with me!”

This whole scenario was like a scene from a horror movie.

Right then and there, he caused a church split, because the people that didn’t stand were singled out.

He was causing division in the church, which is a sin.

That’s why it was like a scene from a horror movie.

And on Monday morning, after being in the office for a little bit, the pastor gave me a call.

He asked me, “do you support me 100%?”:

“No,” I said.

Again, because he was causing division in the church.

And then he said, “we’re gonna have to part ways.”

The conversation ended with him telling me to pack up my office and be gone by the end of the day, so I did.

On the one hand, let’s remember that I was going to leave the church anyways, so the outcome is the same regardless.

But I really hate the way that things ended; I wanted to say goodbye to everybody, but I wasn’t afforded that opportunity.

Suddenly, I’m jobless, and I start playing Xenoblade Chronicles 3 as my full time career.

But at the same time, things continued to progress at Ebenezer; Samie and I visited the church and I eventually accepted the call.

So I moved here in September of 2022 and got straight to work!

One of my biggest takeaways from all of that is that God is in control

It felt like I was stuck in a bad situation and that I would never be able to get out.

But God worked everything out and provided for us during that time.

I can’t help but think about Romans 8:28

Romans 8:28 NLT

28 And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.

He worked these things out for our good, and we knew that we could trust him.

And you can trust Him with the difficult situations in your life as well.

With this in mind, we have finally made it to the final chapter of my testimony.

I am going to share something with you that I have never shared in a group setting before..

So buckle up your seat belts.

Throughout my testimony, I have mentioned my frequent struggles withn anxiety, how I have always felt different from other people, and how I struggle to communicate.

I also talked about the developmental issues I went through when I was very small, which is something that I never really had answers for.

Samie and I start to go down some YouTube rabbit holes, which led me getting an appointment with a neuro psychologist.

So on August 1 of 2023, I go, get tested, and am diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder.

Now, this might be the sort of thing that you hear and think, “Wait, but I thought that autism looked like this,” or “I just thought Michael was just awkward.”

And yeah, unfortunately, our media presents one of two extremes with autism.

You are either non-verbal and unable to take care of yourself, are you are a genius with what they call Savant syndrome.

But there hasn’t been many depictions of people between these two extremes.

My autism presents itself in some pretty unique ways.

Obviously, I’m pretty awkward, and that can make having conversations difficult sometimes.

I also feel really overwhelmed a lot, which forms the backbone of the way that I most frequently experience anxiety.

I am also have dyspraxia, which means I have trouble with coordination and motor skills

So yeah, if you’ve ever seen me try to play basketball at open gym… that’s what’s going on there.

I also really struggle with eye contact, so if I am talking with you and struggling with eye contact, don’t think I don’t like you or that I have something to hide, because I don’t; I just have autism.

But here I am, with a new diagnosis, and it honestly feels like a breath of fresh air.

This might sound weird to you.

“How could being diagnosed with autism be a good thing?”

Well, it gives answers to things that I never had answers for before.

I don’t feel different from everybody else because I’m weird and not good enough; I feel different because I have a different type of brain.

I have found it much easier to be kinder to myself and show myself grace since my diagnosis, so this is some really good news.

And guess what?

A couple of months after that, and Samie finally got diagnosed too.

No wonder I felt like I could connect with her in a way that I couldn’t connect with any other person in the past!

Now, we are in the process of trying to stop hiding from who we are; from who God made us to be.

We are loved by Him, made in His image, and we don’t have to be ashamed of the way that our brains works.

There is a verse that frames this new season of my life for us.

Here it is:

Psalm 139:14 NLT

14 Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.

I thank God for making us the way that we are.

And he wants to use our testimony for his glory, which is why I am telling you about this tonight.

One thing I want to make sure that you take away from this is to never doubt yourself or what God can accomplish through based on anything relating to who you are or what you have done.

I literally have a social/communication disorder and teach the Bible and speak publicly all of the time.

Likewise, Samie is a teacher at a Christian school

This is a testament to God’s faithfulness in our lives.

Now, I know that not everybody here is on the spectrum like me, but we all do have things about ourselves that we struggle to accept and that make us think we aren’t good enough and that God could never use us.

But that’s just not true!

God can do great things through you, and I am proof of that.

Don’t let anyone ever hold you down or keep you back from doing great things for the Kingdom of God.

Thank you for listening to my testimony; I know that this was long, but it was necessary in order for you to know your youth pastor better and for me to testify about how faithful God has been in my life.

Q. Does anyone have any questions before we close?

PRAY