Phileo

1 Peter 3:8 ESV

Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind.

A Friend’s Love.

What does love for a friend look like? We see an example of this love in the story of David and his friend Jonathan.

1 Samuel 19:1–7 ESV

And Saul spoke to Jonathan his son and to all his servants, that they should kill David. But Jonathan, Saul’s son, delighted much in David. And Jonathan told David, “Saul my father seeks to kill you. Therefore be on your guard in the morning. Stay in a secret place and hide yourself. And I will go out and stand beside my father in the field where you are, and I will speak to my father about you. And if I learn anything I will tell you.” And Jonathan spoke well of David to Saul his father and said to him, “Let not the king sin against his servant David, because he has not sinned against you, and because his deeds have brought good to you. For he took his life in his hand and he struck down the Philistine, and the Lord worked a great salvation for all Israel. You saw it, and rejoiced. Why then will you sin against innocent blood by killing David without cause?” And Saul listened to the voice of Jonathan. Saul swore, “As the Lord lives, he shall not be put to death.” And Jonathan called David, and Jonathan reported to him all these things. And Jonathan brought David to Saul, and he was in his presence as before.

Jonathan loved David and so he helped David by warning him of the plot, and even talking Saul out of his murderous rage (at least temporarily)

A friend’s love is strong and sacrificing.

A Godly friendship will attempt to lead each of you closer to Jesus.

Misconception: My friends Don’t Define Me

I’ve heard students over the years talk about thier friendships. and often they mention the idea that they can be friends with people even if they aren’t christians.

1 Corinthians 15:33 ESV

Do not be deceived: “Bad company ruins good morals.”

Proverbs 22:24–25 ESV

Make no friendship with a man given to anger, nor go with a wrathful man, lest you learn his ways and entangle yourself in a snare.

Proverbs 12:26 ESV

One who is righteous is a guide to his neighbor, but the way of the wicked leads them astray.

Each of these verses show us the reality

Illumination: You will become like the people you spend time with.

The Gospel mission calls us to spend time in the world to reach them with the good news of Jesus. Meaning we aren’t supposed to be monks living in seclusion so as to remain holy. But you have different levels o friendship. Levels include general public, aquaintences, friends, Inner Circle.

Proverbs 13:20 ESV

Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.

Tonight we are talking about being careful about who you let into your friends and most importantly your inner circle. Because those people are the ones with the most influence in your hearts and mind because that is how God has wired us as people.

Proverbs 27:17 ESV

Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.

Illustration: Joy has picked up phrases from her coworker this year...

We are built for community, and as such we will become like those whom we spend time with. That truth comes as both a warning and as encouragement. Be careful who you let into that inner circle. The ones that you take advice from. The ones that you depend on. Someone can be a great aquantance fun to be around and share intrests in, but not be a great friend like Jonathan was. He sacrificed for David.

In this story he tried to save David from Saul. Later in life when it became clear that David was God’s annointed destined to be king after Saul, Jonathan supported his Friend David saving his life again and even told David to remember his family when David becomes King. Mind you Jonathan was the “heir to the throne of Saul” There was no reason for him to support David beyond friendship.

Ecclesiastes 4:9–12 ESV

Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken.

Friendship in important, and a True loving Godly friend will try to make you better. And if you are a true friend you will try to help make them better. Friends don’t try to one up eachother. Josh and his buddy enjoyed playing B-ball. They wanted to win the game, yes, but not at the expense of the friendship.

Friends lead eachother to be like Christ.

Proverbs 12:26 ESV

One who is righteous is a guide to his neighbor, but the way of the wicked leads them astray.

So the question becomes... what are the kinds of people you should bring into that inner circle of friendship?

2 Timothy 2:1–2 ESV

You then, my child, be strengthened by the grace that is in Christ Jesus, and what you have heard from me in the presence of many witnesses entrust to faithful men, who will be able to teach others also.

These couple verses make a great map to follow.

Find a Mentor.

Find a someone who will help you grow closer to God. No one knows everything about being a Christian, but there are people who’ve been on this journey longer than you. Let them share the knowledge of years of expereance. And take it to heart. Your path is your own, it will have its own struggles. But these relationships will give you wisdom beyond your own experance.

Find a Partner.

Surround yourself with peers who are seeking to follow God. Promise eachother that you will help encourage them in the faith. Call each other out on sins and mistakes. and pray for eachother as you journey together in Christ.

Find someone to pour into.

Just as you are learning from the mentor and depending on your peers, find someone that you can help grown in Jesus. It isn’t too early to lead by example and help younger Christians on thier journey.

(if you are afraid of not knowing what the answer to their questions are, then you will more likely seek the answers for yourself… There is no better way to learn than teaching someone else.)