Confronting Sin in the Church

Recap

Now that Jesus has taught us about the importance each and every one of His little ones, his spiritual children, Jesus turns to confronting sin. This time though its not in how we deal with our own sin, but how we confront the sin someone else commits against us.

Set it up

Let me start out by saying that it is easier to do the wrong thing & it is harder to do the right thing. Not just in this instance but it most situations. That is until we see the benefit of doing the right thing.

I grew up seeing the church hurt a lot of people, including my parents on a very personal way. It never dawned on me what was actually happening growing up. That came out later really. What I realized later was the path that my parents chose to take. In stead of doing what was easy they chose the path less traveled. They chose to resolve what could be resolved but to not allow anything that was unresolved to sway them from what they knew God wanted to accomplish in them and through them in the church that had caused the hurt.

Church hurt is the reason for so much of the breakdown in the church today. The hard reality is that every one will experience hurt in the church because there are fallen humans in it. So, the goal isn’t to find the perfect church, but to allow God to perfect you, or sanctify you, through the difficulties you experience in the church.

God gave us relationships, not just so we could be “happy” but he also uses them to make us holy. What we need to understand and make a point to do is not add anything intentionally to the fire. How we choose to respond in situations of conflict stems from our hearts. Our hearts are changed and guided by how much we’ve allowed God to change them, and that is totally determined by our walk with the Lord, whether that is a close one of humble submission, or one of association with the Lord, but still filled with a stubborn self-focused heart attitude.

If we bring into moments of conflict a heart that thinks it’s always right and done nothing wrong, that will prove to be an unteachable heart. One not willing to see or even consider that they could have done somehting wrong.

The heart aligned with God is one that will look to His word to guide them through the conflict and look to the greater good of the building up of the body to maturity. A heart aligned with God’s heart is going to desire to work toward’s the healing within the body so as to not destroy what God wants to do with His body for the Kingdom.

Step 1 - 1 on 1

Matthew 18:15 ESV

15 “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother.

It is essential that we go to the offending brother first — not griping and gossiping to others, especially under the guise of sharing a prayer request or seeking counsel. Instead, speak to the party directly.

It would be wrong for anyone to take Jesus’ word here as a command to confront your brother with every sin they commit against you. The Bible says we should bear with one another and be longsuffering towards each other. Yet clearly, there are some things that we cannot suffer long with and must address.

We can say that Jesus gives us two options when your brother sins against you. You can go to him directly and deal with it; or you can drop the matter under Christian longsuffering and bearing with one another. Other options — holding onto bitterness, retaliation, gossiping to others about the problem — are not allowed.

“We must not let trespass rankle in our bosom, by maintaining a sullen silence, nor may we go and publish the matter abroad. We must seek out the offender, and tell him his fault as if he were not aware of it; as perhaps he may not be.” (Spurgeon)

If he hears you, you have gained your brother: You have gained him in two ways. First, the problem has been cleared up. Perhaps you realized that he was right in some ways and he realized you were right in some ways, but the problem is resolved. Second, you have gained him because you have not wronged your brother by going to others with gossip and half the side of a dispute.

It is not to say that your brother MUST agree with you or immediately repent before you. The first real step is that he hears you. This points more to, does he understand you. Do they understand that what they did was sin and that it hurt your relationship. If they really want a relationship with you his heart will be to want to hear you.

It’s interesting that the words hear and heart are one letter apart. When going into conflict, especially involving sin, we must have our hearts being “for” the other person and that only happens when we are allowing God to guide our hearts.

Step 2 Bring Witnesses

Matthew 18:16 ESV

16 But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses.

The circle of people in the situation only becomes wider as the offending party refuses to listen.

Matthew D. Patiently and Truthfully Pursuing the Straying Brother (18:15–20)

At least the following church members should be included: (1) anyone who is likely to be harmed or misled by not knowing about the sin or by failing to recognize its sinfulness and seriousness; (2) anyone who should be warned by the sinning brother’s negative example; and (3) anyone who can be instrumental in bringing the straying brother back to righteousness. The two or three starts with as few as possible for adjudication.

If the stubborn, unrepentant attitude remains, they are to be refused fellowship (let him be to you like a heathen).

It is also true that the one or two more, after hearing both sides of the story, may resolve the issue by assigning responsibility differently than the first offended person had thought.

Proverbs 18:17 ESV

17 The one who states his case first seems right, until the other comes and examines him.

The goal must be the restoration of relationship more than proving one’s self right.

Matthew D. Patiently and Truthfully Pursuing the Straying Brother (18:15–20)

The primary goal of church discipline is not public embarrassment but the recruitment of the entire church to help in the Father’s pursuit of the straying believer.

“Although it is a very unwise thing to interfere in quarrels, yet from this text it is clear that we should be willing to be one of the two or three who are to assist in settling a difference.” (Spurgeon)

Step 3

Matthew 18:17–18 ESV

17 If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector. 18 Truly, I say to you, whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven.

If the straying believer is still resistant to listening even to the leaders of the church, then the final step of church discipline is put into place. This is the hardest and most grievous step for everyone involved. The decision has to be based on scripture and the united consensus of church leadership.

This drives home the importance of nominating and voting in leadership who will be men after GOd’s own heart and be dedicated to carrying out His will. Men in leadership because they are anything other than that is a grave mistake and has lead to much of the destruction of churches all over the world.

This is also a testimony of God’s greatness! That He can still accomplish His will despite our blunders.

That said, We must trust our leaders.

Hebrews 13:17 ESV

17 Obey your leaders and submit to them, for they are keeping watch over your souls, as those who will have to give an account. Let them do this with joy and not with groaning, for that would be of no advantage to you.

The unrepentant one must be treated just as we should treat a heathen and a tax collector — with great love, with the goal of bringing about a full repentance and reconciliation.

Matthew D. Patiently and Truthfully Pursuing the Straying Brother (18:15–20)

“Church discipline” is commonly thought to refer only to those “official” cases in which the sin is extremely serious and the entire church becomes formally involved in the effort to correct the sinning brother or sister. In reality, church discipline is more biblically understood as covering every effort by any individual or group of individuals in the church to turn a straying believer back to righteous living

Once every effort has been made, there is only one thing left to do. Excommunicate the unrepentant believer from the fellowship. On the surface this sounds like a drastic step. Too many churches have looked at this process as a way to get rid of anyone that sins so they won’t have to deal with having sinners in the church. The problem is, there will always be people with sinful natures in the church.

What inevitably happens is this unrepentant person or persons ends up breeding descension within the church and descension tears churches apart.

Titus 3:10 ESV

10 As for a person who stirs up division, after warning him once and then twice, have nothing more to do with him,

So if the matter cannot be resolved, then one unrepentant is to be regarded like a heathen and a tax collector.

This sense of being refused full standing and participation in the body of Christ is what Paul In 1 Corinthians 5.

1 Corinthians 5:11–13 ESV

11 But now I am writing to you not to associate with anyone who bears the name of brother if he is guilty of sexual immorality or greed, or is an idolater, reviler, drunkard, or swindler—not even to eat with such a one. 12 For what have I to do with judging outsiders? Is it not those inside the church whom you are to judge? 13 God judges those outside. “Purge the evil person from among you.”

There is a sense in which the unrepentant one is chastened by their being placed outside of the blessing and protection of fellowship.

If this process is done humbly and according to the Word, this is quite binding in the eyes of God, even if the unrepentant ones just go to another church.

Step 4 Binding and Agreement

Matthew 18:19–20 ESV

19 Again I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. 20 For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them.”

There is real power in agreement in prayer and in the presence of Jesus. This is exactly what the unrepentant ones miss out on.

In the ancient Greek, agree is literally “to symphonize.” Jesus wants us to complement each other like a great orchestra. “It is a metaphor taken from a number of musical instruments set to the same key, and playing the same tune: here, it means a perfect agreement of the hearts, desires, wishes, and voices, of two or more persons praying to God.” (Clarke)

It’s not about the number it’s about the unity with each other as we agree with what God’s word says.

Where two or three are gathered: Jesus here indicated that meetings of His people — indeed, meetings full of power and authority connected to heaven — do not need to be large gatherings. They can be of two or three of His followers at a time.

“Two or three are mentioned, not to encourage absence, but to cheer the faithful few who do not forget the assembling of themselves together, as the manner of some is.” (Spurgeon)

I am there in the midst of them: This means that Jesus isn’t up front, closer to the minister or the leaders. He is in the midst, there to be close to all. It means that he should be proclaimed and revealed to all.

“Our meeting is in the name of Jesus, and therefore there he is; near, not only to the leader, or to the minister, but in the midst, and therefore near to each worshipper.” (Spurgeon)

Ultimately this passage is pointed not at getting the sinner out of the church, but to see Jesus’ church unhindered, unleashed, and unstoppable! So much so that the gates of Hell will not prevail against it.

Jesus’ church will always stand. Individual churches will struggle, faulter, or even close down, but Jesus’ church will never fail! He is the head, we are the body. Our job is to be a part of what Jesus wants to accomplish with His body, not to cause dicension and destruction. To be in agreement together, seeking and praying to Jesus to be glorified in all we do, including how we confront conflict and sin!