Do overs - What do we do when we fail? (Calvary 3/15/24)
Notes
Transcript
A man named Jack was walking along a steep cliff one day when he accidentally got too close to the edge and fell. On the way down he grabbed a branch, which temporarily stopped his fall. He looked down and to his horror saw that the drop below him was more than a thousand feet, and he couldn’t hang on to the branch forever.
So Jack began yelling for help, hoping that someone passing by would hear and lower a rope or do something.
“Help! Help! Is anyone up there? Help!” Jack yelled. No one heard him. He was about to give up when he heard a voice, “Jack, Jack. Can you hear me?”
“Yes, yes! I can hear you. I’m down here!”
“I can see you, Jack. Are you all right?”
“No! I need help. Who are you, and where are you?”
“I am the Lord, Jack. I’m everywhere.”
“The Lord? You mean GOD?”
“That’s me.”
“Oh, God, please help me! I promise that if You get me down from here, I’ll really be a good person. I’ll go back to church and serve you for the rest of my life.”
“Easy on the promises, Jack. Now, here’s what I want you to do. Listen carefully.”
“I’ll do anything, Lord. Just tell me.”
“Okay. Let go of the branch.”
“What?”
“I said, let go of the branch. Trust me. Let go.”
There was a long silence.
Finally Jack yelled, “Help! Help! Help! Is there anyone else up there?”
We’ve all made mistakes and wished that we could go back in time for a do over. We’ve all missed the mark. Basically, if we were honest, we’d have to admit that we’ve failed. Today, I want to walk through many different scriptures that will help us answer the question:
What do we do when we fail?
We are going to start in the book of the Bible that’s devoted to wisdom and the search for wisdom. Proverbs 30
In chapter 30 we find sayings from a man named Agur. What strikes me is his self description.
Proverbs 30:1–3 (CEV)
1....“I am completely worn out!
How can I last?
2 I am far too stupid
to be considered human.
3 I never was wise,
and I don’t understand
what God is like.”
I’ve certainly felt that way and I am willing to bet that you have too. We can identify with feelings of inadequacy. We will could even say, we feel so stupid that we don’t even feel human. Even a monkey seems smarter than us because of the mistakes we’ve made.
The fact is, everyone experiences failure in life. Life is never an unbroken series of victories. We all have setbacks and losses, and sometimes a defeat can seem to overwhelm you. we can even bring defeat on ourselves.
You don’t have to look far to find people in the Bible who felt this way. Poor old Job felt overwhelmed . Look at
Job 17:11 (NLT)
11 My days are over. My hopes have disappeared. My heart’s desires are broken.
Have you ever felt like that? All hope is lost. I guess I go eat worms!
Maybe you aren’t feeling that way right now.
I want to tell you that in life, Do Overs are allowed. If you are alive right now, God will give you a second chance to do your best for Him.
The fact is - you will fail many times in life, but you are never a failure until you give up.
What are some of the causes of failure in our lives?
And what Does God’s Word tell us about getting a fresh start?
We fail to many times simply because we haven’t developed any plans.
12 A prudent person foresees danger and takes precautions. The simpleton goes blindly on and suffers the consequences.
You remember the old saying, “If you fail to plan, you are planning to fail.” You have got to plan ahead.
9 We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps.
We should make plans--counting on God to direct us.
So, one of the reasons we fail is that we tend to be impulsive, and we just don’t plan ahead the way we should.
Being reactive instead of proactive rarely accomplishes what we want because reacting is what happens when we don’t act!
Let me ask you - was it raining when Noah began to build the Ark? Nope! It didn’t rain for 120 years.
Now, that’s I call “Long Range Planning”! One hundred twenty years he worked on that Ark.
Jesus, in one of His parables, said,
28 Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. What is the first thing you will do? Won’t you sit down and figure out how much it will cost and if you have enough money to pay for it?
29 Otherwise, you will start building the tower, but not be able to finish. Then everyone who sees what is happening will laugh at you.
I think first and foremost we fail because we don’t think about the future. If we fail to plan then we should plan to fail.
Here’s another reason we fail: Pride. We fail when we think we’ve made it!
18 Pride goes before destruction, and haughtiness before a fall.
We fail when we think we have it all together. The truth is that we are never going to get anywhere if we think we’ve already made it!
Remember, the person who gets too big for his breeches, will eventually start to show off! Get it? Those pants can only hold so much before they expose more than you want exposed!
Let’s remember something Paul instructed us in 1 Cor 10:12
12 If you think you are standing strong, be careful not to fall.
We fail when we forget that it’s God’s grace that has brought us to where we are. We need to make sure we check ourselves continuously so we don’t fall into pride.
No plan = failure
Pride = failure
The next thing that pushes us to failure is that we are afraid of what others might think of us.
25 Fearing people is a dangerous trap, but trusting the Lord means safety.
This verse is telling that that the moment you start worrying about what other people think, you are doomed to fail.
You’ll fall into a trap. And the fear of failure can be a cause of failure.
One of the greatest failures is the failure to try.
Sometimes on my social media feed I see these “fail” videos. They show people doing things that I look at and say, “why in the world would they even try that!”.
But one thing I will say, at least they try! Sometimes you’ve got to take risks. Every squirrel does get nuts. They’ve got to keep on digging.
Taking steps in faith even when others don’t understand is ok. When we don’t walk in faith because we are afraid of what others think is a trap and can lead us to failure.
No plan = failure
Pride = failure
Fear of what others think = failure
Here’s the next reason I think we fail.
We give up to quickly. I always wonder when I’ve failed what would have happened if I just held out another second, minute, hour, or day.
Truly, breakthrough in our situations is on God’s time table not our own.
I read this saying while I was preparing for this message and I wanted to share it with you:
“Failure is the path of least PERSISTENCE.”
You just keep on keeping on. You never give up. There is a verse that I hold close too. And I think you should too!
9 Don’t get tired of helping others. You will be rewarded when the time is right, if you don’t give up.
There’s one thing I refuse to do - quit. Don’t ever give up. You can ask my wife. Once something gets in my head, we aren’t doing anything else until we find a way to get it done.
19 Being lazy is like walking in a thorn patch, but everyone who does right walks on a smooth road.
Lazy people have trouble all the time! People who are willing to work and Seek God will eventually succeed.
So, at first you don’t succeed, you are normal! Try again. Many times success is just around the corner. You are never a failure till you quit.
Remember Thomas Edison tried 200 different ways to get the light bulb to work. What if he would have quit at 199 - I’d think it might be a little dark in here with no windows!
This is what he said about the failures:
“Don’t call all those experiments a failure; call it an education; I now know 199 ways that don’t work!”
-Thomas Edison
Here’s a little quote I read that I thought was super cute: “The value of the postage stamp is its ability to stick to one thing until it gets there!”
We need not give up. Trust in the Lord to renew your strength and resolve. Victory is promised. We just need to wait for it to come.
Here are the reasons we fail:
No plan = failure
Pride = failure
Fear of what others think = failure
Giving up = failure
Here’s the last reason I’m going to bring up as to why I think we fail - there are more, this is the last and to me, probably the most important one.
We fail because we fail to listen to God!
12 There’s a way of life that looks harmless enough; look again—it leads straight to hell.
Here’s the simple truth, God’s Word is filled with guidelines and principles to make our lives all that God wants us to be, and all that we want to be.
But most of the time we’d rather listen to our feelings - “Well, I feel that this is the right thing to do, even if the Bible teaches differently.”
And the fact is, God’s Word is often the exact opposite of our natural inclinations.
God’s Word says, “The way to get is to give; the way to be honored is to be humble; the way to greatness is to be a servant.”
The Bible can seem to go completely opposite of our natural way of thinking. But that makes sense because most of the time our way of thinking is wrong!
8 The Lord says: “My thoughts and my ways are not like yours.
9 Just as the heavens are higher than the earth, my thoughts and my ways are higher than yours.
We will fail when we don’t listen to God. In fact, we get into deep trouble when we don’t listen to God. When we fail to read His words and spend time with Him in prayer we are destined to get tripped up and on the wrong path.
Here’s my hit list again for guaranteed ways to fail:
No plan = failure
Pride = failure
Fear of what others think = failure
Giving up = failure
Don’t listen to God = failure
I’m not going to list anymore ways we can miss the mark. It’s too depressing. I want to spend the rest of our time answering following question:
What do we do when we fail?
Because the truth is, we are going to fail. We are going to forget to plan, we will walk in pride, we will care what others think, we will give up too soon, and we will forget to spend time with the Lord.
What should we do when we mess up?
First you need to understand something about God.
God is way more interested in your future than your past.
A person’s past has never influenced whether or not God loves them or has a future for them. Let’s get that over and done with. You matter to Him. You always have and always will.
Here’s what I think: Do overs are allowed.
What’s a do over?
As a kid, we would play all sorts of games. In my life I was Charlie Brown in the flesh. I remember playing kickball on the playground. They’d roll the ball to me, I’d run up and kick as hard as I could, but totally miss the ball!
I’d yell, “Do over!”.
I wanted another chance. I knew what I did wrong and I wanted a shot at making it count.
Because you’re here in this room, or you’re watching online, I’m telling you you can yell “Do over!” in your life.
You can get a fresh start.
There are a few things you need to consider when calling for a do over.
The first is that you need to accept responsibility for your failures or mistakes.
13 If you don’t confess your sins, you will be a failure. But God will be merciful if you confess your sins and give them up.
How amazing is this truth? It’s opposite of what we might think is true. We think if we admit our faults then we will receive judgement, but the opposite is true. We receive grace and mercy.
Solomon is saying, “If you have made a mistake, admit it” - “I blew it, I was wrong.” Face up to it. Be honest with yourself and with others.
Most of us are experts at passing the buck. It’s in our natural sin nature. Adam blamed Eve, and he blamed God - “The women You gave put here with me gave me the fruit, and I ate it.” Losers are pros at blaming other people.
Blaming things comes so easy to our minds. We blame the economy, we blame fate. Many people blame their parents, or their spouse, or the government.
But wisdom says, if you want a do over, just admit your mistakes and move on. People might not forgive, but God will and that matters most.
This crazy idea that we have to be perfect in the eyes of other people is in fact crazy!
Here’s a secret, people know we aren’t perfect. There’s no reason to play the blame game. We should own our failures because when we do, we will receive mercy.
How do you get a do over?
Admit your mistakes = do over
The next way to get a do over is to stop regretting and start repenting!
Repent seems like a heavy idea. It’s really not. In the new testament when you read the words of John the Baptist, Jesus, and Paul they used a word called “metanoia” with means a change of mind. It means to look at something in a new way and change the direction you were going.
Repentance means that you recognize the error, and you go in a new direction.
To many times people get caught up in their past and let it define who they are now. They say, “I’ve done so much wrong, I’m a complete loser, I could never be used by God. I’m worthless.”
They regret their actions. This is ok. But regret must move us to repent! It’s how you get a do over!
10 For the sadness that is used by God brings a change of heart that leads to salvation—and there is no regret in that! But sadness that is merely human causes death.
See that here are two kinds of sadness mentioned in this verse: godly sadness, and worldly sadness - godly sorrow and worldly sorrow.
What’s the difference? Well, godly sorrow, it says, brings a change of heart. It motivates you to do something - “By the grace of God I’m going to change, I’m going to be different; I’ve learned a lesson.”
Worldly Sorrow is just demoralizing and depressing, and it causes death -“Oh, poor me!” One of the most devastating emotions in life is self-pity - “Poor me! Nobody likes me.” You never learn anything at a pity party. That’s worldly sorrow.
Godly sorrow leads to repentance - a change of heart.
The truth is that almost every success in life is built on a failure. So you learn from it.
I’m convinced that some things are learned only through failure. The greatest lesson’s I’ve learned have come from doing the wrong things.
I can remember the day I stuck a butter knife into a live electrical outlet. Lesson learned. I only have to do it once to know I never wanted to do it again! In fact, even to this day, I am very hesitant to plug anything into an outlet!
Remember the wisdom of Solomon - one of my favs that I’ve already shared in this series!
30 A severe beating can knock all of the evil out of you!
Now, isn’t that truth?
Can I encourage you with something you might need to hear?
Stop regretting . Regretting doesn’t change anything. It only keeps you looking in the past. It’s like looking in the rearview mirror while driving down the highway. If you keep doing it you’re going to crash.
How to we get a do over in life?
Admit your mistakes = do over
Stop regretting and start repenting = do over
Here’s the next thing we need to know if we are going to have a do over:
13 My friends, I don’t feel that I have already arrived. But I forget what is behind, and I struggle for what is ahead.
14 I run toward the goal, so that I can win the prize of being called to heaven. This is the prize that God offers because of what Christ Jesus has done.
Paul is saying don’t let your defeats, defeat you.
What memory comes back to haunt you? Is there something that the enemy throws back in your face and you say: “I really wish I never did that, it’s the biggest mistake of my life”.
Let me tell you again what I’ve already said in different words.
Your past is past; it’s water under the bridge.
You can’t change the past by worrying about it, so let it go, and focus on the future.
It’s not so much where you have been, but what direction your feet are headed now that counts. The past doesn’t have control of you any more if you have accepted the forgiveness that Jesus offers.
Peter and Judas are two people who had pretty massive failures when it came to serving and loving Jesus. How they reacted to their mistakes is very telling of how we should react. Their reactions teach us how to get a do over in life.
You know what they did: they both denied Jesus.
Peter denied his Lord three times -
75 Suddenly, Jesus’ words flashed through Peter’s mind: “Before the rooster crows, you will deny three times that you even know me.” And he went away, weeping bitterly.
It’s not hard to imagine how Peter felt. Here’s a man who had lived with Jesus for three years, and he didn’t have the courage to admit he was a follower.
He felt like a complete failure; and he must have prayed. “O God, how could You ever use me? I’ve disgraced You, and I feel miserable and wretched and ashamed.” He felt genuine remorse and godly sorrow. Here’s what he did:
Admit your mistakes = do over
Stop regretting and start repenting = do over
Not so with Judas. He didn’t have the same type of sorrow.
3 When Judas, who had betrayed him, realized that Jesus had been condemned to die, he was filled with remorse. So he took the thirty pieces of silver back to the leading priests and the elders.
4 “I have sinned,” he declared, “for I have betrayed an innocent man.” “What do we care?” they retorted. “That’s your problem.”
5 Then Judas threw the silver coins down in the Temple and went out and hanged himself.
Peter repented. Judas committed suicide.
Dealing with our mistakes is understanding God’s grace. Judas took his own life because he didn’t understand that God could have restored him.
Peter had to feel like a loser. His weeping was a significant sign that he regretted and repented.
On Easter morning remember that Jesus told them to go tell the disciples AND Peter that He was alive.
Why did He single out Peter? I think it was because Peter probably felt as though his work with Christ was over. He had gone too far.
But God allows Do overs in life.
Admit your mistakes = do over
Stop regretting & Start repenting = do over
Forget the Past = do over
So Peter repented, and changed, and the man who denied his Lord three times was the man whom Jesus used 40 days later to preach on the Day of Pentecost, when 3,000 people committed their lives to Christ.
I don’t care what your failure is in life. You are not washed up unless you choose to quit and reject the grace of God.
So, accept responsibility for your failure; stop regretting and start repenting; forget the former and focus on the future; and there’s one last thing we need to understand for a do over in life.
We need to Trust God to work out the details.
I’m going to use the verse you’ve heard thousands of times because it’s imperative that you understand how God works.
28 And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.
Our lives can sure look ugly sometimes. Like a big ol mess of extension cords that seem like they will never get untangled.
Have you ever said to yourself “I don’t know how anything good could ever come from this”
Here’s the deal, we don’t have to know HOW we just need to know WHO.
Another famous verse coming your way:
11 For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.
Do you need a do over?
17 Anyone who belongs to Christ is a new person. The past is forgotten, and everything is new.
There it is plain and simple. Christ is what you need. Being born again truly means that you have another shot at this thing called life.
Admit your mistakes = do over
Stop regretting & Start repenting = do over
Forget the Past = do over
Trust God = do over
God is the expert when it comes to do overs. Trust Him. Take Him at His word and you’ll be able to walk in a freedom that you’ve never felt before.
Jesus said if you want to be free, truly free, then you need to trust in Him.
36 So if the Son sets you free, you are truly free.
You see, God specializes in turning crucifixions into resurrections. And Jesus Christ was nailed to the Cross so that you could have a second chance - a new beginning.
Here’s the question are you in need of a do over?
Admit your mistakes = do over
Stop regretting & Start repenting = do over
Forget the Past = do over
Trust God = do over.