Part 3 - 02/18/2024 Love Month (A New Kind of Honesty)

Elder Jonathan Lonon Sermon Notes A New Kind of Honesty Based on Principle #3: Communicate from the Heart – from Chapter 18 of “The Relationship Principles of Jesus”, by Tom Holladay Recognition: 1. All honor and glory to our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ 2. Pastor Wayne Mack and First Lady Michelle Mack, and all elders, ministers, and servants of the most high who serve here at Grace Place Atlanta Church of God by Faith, including my lovely wife. 3. The speakers who have preceded me, and that have yet to share, during this 40-day love series! Similar to “The Purpose Driven Church” series that our church experienced many years ago, we are again captivated by the awakening of our church to the simplicity and power of the Gospel on a topic that for many can be a very complex and daunting area: Relationships. We have already learned that the most important thing, above what many might put at the top of their list, is relationship. Now this does not conflict with what God loves the most, according to John 3:16, the world. His whole purpose in sending His Son to die (as a sacrifice in payment for our sins), and to rise (as the defeating blow to death and the grave), is you and me rejoined to Him. If that isn’t about relationship, especially since we could not afford and definitely didn’t deserve this reuniting, I don’t know what is relationship! In fact, I should just step down from this lectern right now… (oh, well, guess I can’t do that!) Now in the process of reading “The Relationship Principles of Jesus”, by Tom Holladay, we have discovered that relationship is something that Jesus was keenly interested in because it is woven throughout the tapestry of His ministry. How do you know this Elder Lonon? Because it’s in the Bible! Because I paid attention in Sunday School, Bible Study, Theology school, class people, class! I didn’t just to learn to read, but to comprehend! Because I admit when I don’t know something as completely as I thought (i.e., I’m not a know-it-all… like some of you… oops)! How do I know it’s woven throughout the tapestry of His ministry? Because I listen to my Creator and my Savior! Because Jesus walked His walk and talked His talk like there was nothing more important than relationships! And if that doesn’t convince you, then notice that the foundation of His teachings were based on building relational activity that would draw souls close enough to God that they could recognize His kingdom (and either accept Him by faith, or decline His offer in doubt). And where the relational aspects of His teaching wasn’t directed at the unbeliever, it was to draw redeemed souls into better connection with one another for the same purpose of ultimately bringing some others to a saving knowledge of Himself. In the past eighteen days we have learned about some relationship principles, such as Principle #1: [to] Place the Highest Value on Relationships, which we found involves us… Loving the Lord with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength Loving everyone and someone as our neighbor Then Relationship Principle #2: [to] Love as Jesus Loves You, which reminded many of us of that 11th commandment that we mostly overlook about loving one another, which means making tough choices like… Acting Immediately and Radically Choosing to Fellowship and Forgive Choosing to Accept and Sacrifice Wow! That was plenty, and it’s been really good (including the food on Thursday’s), but this 7-day period is going to take us over the halfway mark on our journey to God-like relationship as we explore Relationship Principle #3: [to] Communicate from the Heart, which highlights… How hard communication really is! That communication is built upon trust The connection between mouth and heart in communication And more, including honesty, God-inclusion in the conversation, getting heard (you know [if old enough], “when EF Huttin speaks…”), and finding and fixing problems with communication Today, I will highlight from this principle something that makes heartfelt communication a reality: A New Kind of Honesty! I noticed in the teaching on last Thursday, the instructor repeatedly used the phrase "honestly, I…”. She was being transparent about some ways that she handled some situations or that she approaches some areas of her life on a day-to-day basis. This good, as she shared how some approaches may remain, but how others may be modified based on what she had learned from the lessons on Principle #3. Thank you, Sis. Rhonda Whitehead, for making my opening easy! Now, let’s start with a scripture reading from the book. Matthew 12:34 Reading from New Living Translation Bible (NLT). 33 “A tree is identified by its fruit. If a tree is good, its fruit will be good. If a tree is bad, its fruit will be bad. 34 You brood of snakes! How could evil men like you speak what is good and right? For whatever is in your heart determines what you say (emphasis added) 35 A good person produces good things from the treasury of a good heart, and an evil person produces evil things from the treasury of an evil heart. 36 And I tell you this, you must give an account on judgment day for every idle word you speak. 37 The words you say will either acquit you or condemn you.” Topic: A New Kind of Honesty! Background on Scriptures and Today’s Message This lesson will focus primarily on the honesty element of the principle of communicating from the heart, but I wanted to look at the entire scripture surrounding Part B of Verse 34 so that we have added context and can maybe learn more lessons from Christ about this principle. These few verses still don’t capture the essence of why Jesus launched into this discussion and began to communicate from the heart as we hear. You must step even further back to at least verse 22 of chapter 12 where He heals the demon possessed man, amazing the crowd, but only causing the true hearts of the proud Pharisees to be uttered when they opened their big mouths. Do you have a big mouth? Ok, never mind… do you have a big mouth with nothing worth saying? They prove their senselessness about the truth by declaring Jesus to be empowered by Satan. This was in their minds – which Jesus was reading – because they had not even spoken it yet! Yes, He knows what’s in your mind and your heart before it comes out. What kind of words are about to come out of your mouth from your mind, oh revered teacher of the Jewish people (or titled one of the mighty saints of the most high God)?! After clearing that up, and making it known to all that they better stop rejecting and start listening to the Spirit, since that was the only way to be forgiven, Jesus moved on, lowering His tone for a brief sentence. Before we look at that sentence, notice that within the conversation with the Pharisees, Jesus injected one of the most important lessons about communication that we could ever hear as men who need relationship with God. You must hear the Spirit. You must listen to the Spirit. You must obey the Spirit. You must not grieve the Spirit. As One, the Father, the Son, and Spirit are communicating the same message. Upon His departure from this earth, Jesus promised, and soon after delivered on that promise, the indwelling of His Spirit to the ones who believed on Him and accepted His sacrifice of love. This Spirit will never leave you nor forsake you. You can rely upon Him for guidance, direction, comfort, help, and for what to say when you need to communicate!! Now, did you ask him to speak for you, or did you rattle-off like these Pharisees with their “know-it-all” attitudes? Now that we got that straight (well, Jesus got that straight), that brief sentence where Jesus lowered His voice for a moment is found in verse 33, where He uses a tree to illustrate how to identify good or bad communication. Is the fruit from the tree, or from the life of the person sharing it, good or bad? It is easily measured by what comes forth. The interesting thing here is that Jesus does not sugarcoat His communications back to them. He calls them what they are (snakes), and tells them that what they are saying is not surface half-talk, but is what they have established as part of their own wayward growth and thinking – it is from their heart that they are speaking evil things. What makes it so bad is that they don’t likely know how evil what they are saying is: that is, to equate Jesus, the Son of the living God, with Satan, whom God had cast out of heaven long before! You would know this! When your fruit is righteous because you have been nourished by the Spirit from the Words of God Himself (i.e., the Bible), your conversation will be righteous. But not only that, your conversation will sometimes be brutally honest! Sometimes, you’ve got to say what you mean, and mean what you say! That means that all communication won’t be peachy and rosy! Something that was revealed even more clearly to me during this 40-day series is that building a relationship with anyone, including with God, is not easy – at least not for the times when the growth part must happen! For God to allow us to “slide” and do what we wanted, when we want and how we want, would not be truth or honesty, and would surely lead (or mislead) to our own demise. If for every trial and challenge, He stepped in and banished the woe, saying, “Awe, baby! I love you so much, I won’t let you feel the pain and struggle of growth. I’ll take you gently across the chasm – no walking on water for you! Hang on now, you comfortable? Here we go!”, if He did that, you would be a wimp, a loner, a sorry excuse for a … oh, I’m sorry, you would just NOT be bearing the fruit that leads to a great relationship with God and others. You would either be afraid to serve and then say or do nothing. Or you would be proud to serve, but be saying and doing all the wrong things. We need the refreshing, striking, and wonderful honesty of Jesus! Whether we are right in our communications, or wrong, we must welcome his loving assessment. Yes, it’s loving, even when it may surprise us! Yes, he still loved Peter when he had to be checked on several occasions, such as the “little faith” incident on the water, the “we’ll protect you from death” speech where he was rebuked to get behind Jesus, and even later when he would not eat the unclean thing! And speaking of the unclean thing, the Jews were quite rejecting of the unclean people, the Gentiles (and Samaritans too), while Jesus was walking among them. Imagine their surprise when the most honest Jesus “praised the great faith” of Roman guard who took Him at His word alone, not even needing the religious fanfare that we so often seek to inspire us! He didn’t need Pastor Jesus to come over to his house! This was honesty from the heart on both sides that connected in a way that brought rich relationship. I often wonder about those who Jesus ministered to with such honesty, and whether they became a part of the early church. I could imagine that their personal experiences with Christ, as with the apostles, brought a realness to the building of relationships in the Ekklesia (the church), in the community, in the home, and in the marketplace. To see the transformation of our environments into relationship havens of hope, joy, and peace through Christ, we must adopt this honesty in communication that Christ exhibited. We must go beyond the niceties and do hard honest work as spoken in Ephesians 4:15 of “speaking the truth in love”. This is not easy, especially today when to love you means to tell you the truth – a truth you probably don’t want to accept. It hurts. As the saying goes, “It’s tight, but it’s right!” The author of the book we’re reading in this series explains how some folks “aim” the truth like a weapon at others, versus using the truth as a salve to heal. Verus personally administering soul-saving care and guidance through refined and informed conversation. You know, finding a hurt and healing it, finding a need and meeting it. Not tearing down others with our prideful words or rhetoric (i.e., filthy communication), but building others up as we serve and say what is representative of a tree bearing good fruit. You ever noticed how a good, ripe, juicy, tasty, wholesome, fresh, clean, luscious fruit will stir up a lively conversation? Child, where did you get that from? What store? What vendor? What farm? What region? If you have good fruit, you will have good conversations! You will find that building or having good relationships (including new ones) is not as difficult as you may think. When you are doing right by God, He has a way of clearing the path for you to be His witness and light. As you are spreading the truth in love, always maintain the balance of honesty. You may be right and you may be sincere, but did you also share your heart (the bad part)? Did you let the other person know you have sinned too, or that you have fears, or needs, or hurts? Well, if you didn’t, the communication is still lopsided. Either you are sharing or they are sharing and even if what somebody is saying is truth, it’s still only half the truth! Until the other half of the conversation is exposed, we don’t really know how to address the need(s). So we know we need to be loving and truthful, and honest in our communications, but what is the right time to do it? Maybe when the other party is bearing good fruit (they’re all right with me!)? Maybe when the other party is so down, they need my love to pick them up (Super Saint to the rescue!)? Maybe when I know if I don’t say something, things are going to get to the breaking point (the last possible minute!)? Those times could work, but the right time to be honest is always right now! Don’t we just love setting up a meeting “down the road”! Let me put you on my calendar. We are thinking that maybe this will clear up and go away. Maybe they will come across the thing I know they need to know from another source – in fact, Lord I pray right now that you “send” them the answer! I’d rather not take it to them! Let’s close with the rich young ruler, and how Jesus took the “right now” approach to honesty in communication. This is especially important today, because the church today tends to cater to the culture or the elite to gain traction for influence (although we don’t need to do so). We have a message of truth, it is paramount and unwavering, and it is capable of bringing all the hope and healing necessary for all nations. Why do we need to pander, just tell the truth – NOW! Just be straightforward about right and righteousness according to the gospel of Jesus Christ unapologetically. When done in love, from the heart, and with honest intent and purpose, the result will be what it needs to be. We should ask for that Spirit of Truth to guide us for each unique encounter where honesty will be needed. For this particular case, the YRR needed to hear a few lessons BEFORE the opportunity to reveal the Adam-to-Jesus-to-Heaven narrative. First, he needed to honestly know that you can’t flatter Jesus (or a believer connected to the true vine)! Don’t let your title, or your “blessings”, or your “personal” faith, or anything else cause you to easily be persuaded to accept accolades and be drawn into an unhealthy relationship. Jesus saw right through this dishonest communication and so should we. Next, when you are inquisitive with the other person with regard to the truth, don’t be so excited just because they can quote a few scriptures, sing your favorite song, or pray till thunder and lightning is aroused! Ask God for wisdom in how to instruct them. If they are humbly willing to do what you have instructed, it may be a true sign that continuing the conversation is worthwhile. Sometimes you must know when to drop the conversation and come back to it at another time. This time, Jesus saw right through the pride and religiosity of the YRR. Sure you know the law (you can quote some word), but can you sell all you have? Can you speak to the person who is homeless? Can you apologize to your wife or children? Can you give back that money you stole from those vendors, or from your government, or from your company, or from your church? Uh huh! The hard honest truth will force a decision of yea or nay. After that yea, the next level of the communication can occur, but not until then, or else it won’t be real and things could actually be getting worse. For the YRR, Jesus’ responses to him were unexpected but yet revealing. It was his decision to walk away. When you stick to the Word and you humble yourself, be honest, and show heartfelt love, you may not get the reaction you ought to get (although, sometimes God will use you to draw or revive a soul – hallelujah!), but you can rest assured that you labor is not in vain in the Lord! Altar call Return to Service Leader