Flesh vs Spirit

Intro

this morning we are kicking off a brand new series, 9 Keys to Better Relationships. I’m sure you’ve noticed that something is very wrong in this world. It feels like every time I turn around, another marriage is in crisis or falling apart. A lifelong friendship is disolved. I was even told recently that brothers who had been in business together had recently gone their separate ways over a disagreement. I’m speaking really vaguely, and maybe some of you are wondering, “Is he refering to this situation?” The problem is, in my vagueness, I could be refering to a number of different situations because this story is not a rarity, but in fact it is becoming more and more common place.

How do we protect our relationships? How do we prevent our friendships and marriages from becoming just another stat, following what seems to be the common trend?

Well, I think I have discovered 9 things in scripture that might be the solution we are looking for. I believe that if we understand and implement these 9 things to the extent that God’s word unpacks them, our marriages will be stronger. Our relationship with our kids and parents will be better. I honestly believe that you will be a better friend to those God has put into your life. At the end of the day, that is the one our society needs. People need better friends that are going to have positive influence in their lives and guide them through the challenges that come their way.

So with that, if you have your bible, turn to Galatians 5. If you don’t have your bible it will be on the screen and in the app if you want to follow along.

Galatians 5:16–18 NLT

So I say, let the Holy Spirit guide your lives. Then you won’t be doing what your sinful nature craves. The sinful nature wants to do evil, which is just the opposite of what the Spirit wants. And the Spirit gives us desires that are the opposite of what the sinful nature desires. These two forces are constantly fighting each other, so you are not free to carry out your good intentions. But when you are directed by the Spirit, you are not under obligation to the law of Moses.

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Flesh vs Spirit

Paul kicks off this passage by reminding the reader that there is a war going on in each of your lives. There is the sinful nature, the thing that each of us has inherited from Adam and Eve when they sinned against God in the Garden of Eden; and there is the Spirit, which wants the things of God.

Paul says these two forces want what is contrary to the other. The sinful nature wants what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit wants what is contrary to the sinful nature.

In Romans, Paul says that this is the reason that you know the good you must do and don’t do it. This is why you know what is wrong and you shouldn’t do, but you do it anyways. There are these two forces fighting each other, and every moment you are faced with which side you are going to follow.

Paul then goes on to unpack specifically what each side desires.

Galatians 5:19–21 NLT

When you follow the desires of your sinful nature, the results are very clear: sexual immorality, impurity, lustful pleasures, idolatry, sorcery, hostility, quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambition, dissension, division, envy, drunkenness, wild parties, and other sins like these. Let me tell you again, as I have before, that anyone living that sort of life will not inherit the Kingdom of God.

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Selfish vs Generous

I want to start by looking at the first list. In case you are wondering, when Paul talks about something like sexual immorality, that is a very broad term. Sexual immorality is anything that falls outside God’s design for sex. Just so we are all on the same page here, this is what God’s design is, in picture form.

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This is where the gift of sex is acceptable. Anything outside of this is outside of God’s plan.

but there is something more that unites everything that is on this list. Everything on this brings momentary, personal pleasure. Let’s look at outbursts of anger. Who here hasn’t just needed to blow off some steam? Who hasn’t needed to get something off their chest, regardless of how the other person feels when you’re done? Even idolatry in those days. You could find any god or goddess that would help satisfy some kind of desire within you. Your commitment to any particular god hung on whatever the flavor of the month was. It is still the same today.

The other thing that each of these have in common is that the momentary pleasure usually leads to long term destruction of something else. Sexual immorality will destroy your marriage, your perception of intimacy, and devalue the opposite sex in your life. Quarreling and jealousy fuel the desire to be number in life and making sure everyone else knows it. In fact, you often end up stepping on others in order to get to the top. Drunkenness and wild parties often lead to loss of control and any number of people getting hurt as you live out your fantasy. It also leads to long term feelings of guilt, physical illness, etc.

The sinful nature is out to satisfy me, and it doesn’t matter who gets hurt in the process, as long as I feel good in the moment. It doesn’t even matter if I get hurt, as long as I get that momentary release. But not only do these lead to destruction in the here and now, they also lead to

Galatians 5:22–23 NLT

But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things!

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On the other side, we have the fruit of the Spirit. Some of you probably had to memorize the fruit of the Spirit in Sunday School growing up and could probably recite them by memory.

we are going to get into each of these fruits specifically over the next number of weeks, but there is something significant I need to point out this morning, and I want you to be mindful of it as we go through the series. Paul says the fruit of the Spirit. One of the biggest analogies the New Testament uses when describing the family of the God or the kingdom of God the image of a tree. Jesus said in John 15:5-8

John 15:5–8 NLT

“Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing. Anyone who does not remain in me is thrown away like a useless branch and withers. Such branches are gathered into a pile to be burned. But if you remain in me and my words remain in you, you may ask for anything you want, and it will be granted! When you produce much fruit, you are my true disciples. This brings great glory to my Father.

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Paul says in Romans that Gentiles are branches from the wild olive that have been grafted into the vine. This plant analogy is strong in the New Testament.

It is important that you see this because of what that should bring to mind. If you were to plant an apple tree in the backyard, the purpose of said apple tree is not so you give it apples, right? You plant an apple tree because it gives you apples. You plant an orange tree because it gives you oranges.

The Spirit within you produces these fruits that Paul describes so that you give them to others. Love is produced in you so that you can give it others, in a world starved of true love. Paul talks about peace that surpasses understanding so that you can give peace to others. I worked for a pastor who always taught his staff that in the midst of chaos, the leader must bring the calm. If I walked into a situation with the peace of God, it didn’t take long for everyone else to calm down.

Kindness, faithfulness, these are all things that you give the people in your life. Even self-control. It can easy to see self-control as something I need more of so that I can be in better shape or I’m not being lazy. You actually give self-control to others when you resist the urge to lash out or lose control.

When the first lost list is often things that give momentary pleasure at the cost of others, this list often entails being a blessing to others at cost to ourselves, and that is often why what should be an easy decision between the two difficult. It is why you know that your spouse needs some love and patience, but it would just feel better to get something off your chest to great pain to them. It is why you know that your coworker really just needs some kindness right now, but it feels better to pick a fight and get a rise out of them.

There are two forces at work in your life. One creates momentary pleasure, though results in long term pain and destruction. The other may require short term sacrifice, but results in long term life and fruitfulness. Sometimes you just need to see past the moment.

Galatians 5:24–26 NLT

Those who belong to Christ Jesus have nailed the passions and desires of their sinful nature to his cross and crucified them there. Since we are living by the Spirit, let us follow the Spirit’s leading in every part of our lives. Let us not become conceited, or provoke one another, or be jealous of one another.

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So much of scripture talks in terms of relationships, in terms of the whole. You are part of something bigger then yourself, and you have been given the Holy Spirit to help you be a lifegiving part of the whole.

This week, I want each of you to put something called STAR into practice. Here is what STAR is:

Stop

Take a breath

Appreciate who Jesus is and what’s done

Respond in a Christ honoring way

as you interact with people, you will be faced with the option of satisfying some desire within you, or giving life to the other person. Even if you think you know what the right thing to do is, I want you to stop, take a breath, appreciate who Jesus is, and respond in a way that honors Him.

Give the Holy Spirit space to lead you in everything this week, and you will find yourself taking a star moment by default and seeing the fruit more abundant in your life.

Invitation

now one of the things that this passage assumes is that you are a follower of Jesus, and that His Holy Spirit dwells within you. Maybe you are here this morning and you are not sure if the Holy Spirit is a part of your life. Maybe you’ve never made Him your Savior, or you did, but it was years ago and you haven’t really lived it out.

I want you lead you in a short prayer. You can say it quietly in your heart.

Jesus, I admit I am far from You. Today, I want to make You my Lord and Savior. I repent of my sins, and I invite your Holy Spirit to come and dwell in my heart. Thank you for dying for my sins, and coming back again three days later. I commit to live for you for the rest of my life. Amen

if you prayed that prayer with me, tell someone at your table or come tell me. You just made the best decision of your life. It may not always be easiest, but it will certainly be the best.

Everyone else, let’s pray!

Discussion Questions

1. What stood out from today’s message?

2. Which desire of the sinful nature would you say you struggle with most?

You don’t have to get into specifics, just share and be open to receiving prayer for victory.

3. Which fruit of the Spirit do you want to share more of this week?

Why that one? Who are you going to try to share it with?