When Rights Are Wrong, Part 1

5 Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, 6 who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, 7 but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. 8 And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. 9 Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, 10 so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, 11 and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.

Explain direction of upcoming studies

Explain why I am bringing some topical studies.

Culturally, we are more than ever in an entitlement mentality, entitlement culture.

People do what people want regardless of how anyone else feels about it.

Anger and depression at life’s disappointments is at an all time high.

The selfishness of man’s inconsiderate actions escalates.

And the church is not exempt.

You and I are NOT exempt from thinking and acting in entitled ways.

Even if we are unaware of it, it is present far more often than we want to think or imagine.

EXAMPLE: Having to wait 30 minutes for my food at Wendy’s the other day. I mean, don’t I have the right NOT to be inconvenienced by having to wait so long? Shouldn’t they be thinking of me first and get their act together?

Body

Big Idea: The life of surrender requires that we yield up our “rights” to God.

Let me begin by explaining the path of demandingness. How do we get on such a path?

The Path of Demandingness

Understand this…

Christ, who is our example, willingly surrendered His divine rights and lived a dependent life drawing on the resources available from His relationship with his Father. Developing a life characterized by humble dependence on God requires that you relinquish your perceived rights that often have become demands you place on your relationships and circumstances.

You must be aware that you can quickly become demanding of God, others and your circumstances.

You begin with desires that may be biblical or unbiblical.

You may have specific desires for your spouse, family and other relationships

that your wife respect you.

that your husband love you.

that your children obey you.

that your boss recognize and affirm you.

These are biblical desires and goals, but can become idols and we can respond sinfully when we do not get them. We can demand them instead of aiming towards them.

You may have specific desires about your circumstances in life

for financial stability.

for good health.

to have a job, enjoy your job or advance in your job.

to be free from painful circumstances or inconveniences of life.

You begin believing that you deserve to have your desires met or fulfilled. This can stem from some of the following sinful beliefs:

You deserve to reach your goals, which usually include expectations from God, people and circumstances.

You can control your world to achieve your goals.

God and others exist to give you what you believe you need to reach your goals.

You add “I deserve” to “I desire,” and it becomes a demand.

Your desire becomes a perceived “need” or “right”.

You believe you must have this “need” met to be fulfilled.

You demand that God and others cooperate to meet this “need”.

You expect your circumstances or the actions of others to meet your demands.

Demands that are not met become disappointment.

People fail to meet your demands; you become angry, critical or judgmental.

Circumstances do not cooperate to meet your demands, so you become fearful, negative and discontent.

You place yourself as judge over your circumstances, other people and even God when your demands are not met.

Disappointment will soon turn into discouragement.

You become self-focused.

You view yourself as a victim or martyr.

You live in self-pity.

You blame God and others for your unmet expectations.

Ungodly sadness/anger

When I am disappointed or angry with God’s plan for my life, I am really disappointed or angry with the planner.

Discouragement can eventually lead to depression.

You are not being given what you believe you deserve.

You have lost hope of having your perceived needs, rights or demands met.

Your anger toward God, others and circumstances continues to compound and is now turned inward as well.

Your failure to deal biblically with these sinful attitudes compounds into sinful depression.

The Path of Surrender

Live for God’s Kingdom

Matthew 6:33.

Matthew 6:33 ESV

33 But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.

God’s solution is that you correct your sinful beliefs about what you really deserve.

You deserve God’s wrath and to burn in hell.

Anything less is grace…

You believe you deserve your desires be met, especially if they are biblical.

God does not promise to meet your perceived needs or rights, which have become demands.

You must utilize God’s resources to align your beliefs with God’s truth.

Renew your mind concerning your beliefs about what you deserve.

Confess how you have sinfully responded to the impact of your unmet demands.

Relinquish your perceived rights.

Find contentment instead of resentment

Philippians 4:13.

Philippians 4:13 “13 I can do all things through him who strengthens me.”

Forgive those who have disappointed you.

Put your hope in God and trust His sovereign plan and provision for your life.

Over the next three weeks, I want to unpack this for us and help us come to a biblical understanding of what our rights are, what we deserve and do not deserve, and how we ought to respond to and live in an entitlement culture.

We need to begin with the fact that….

Judgment Deserved, Mercy Given

What are the two commands which Christ gives that summarizes all aspects of the Law? (Matthew 22:37, 39).

Matthew 22:37–39 “37 And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. 38 This is the great and first commandment. 39 And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.”

Love God. Love Others.

And what is biblical love?

Unselfishly choosing for another’s highest good.

How do we fail to love God perfectly?

We fail to obey His commands.

We fail to follow the Spirit’s leading.

Like Peter, we sometimes deny knowing Jesus…maybe not in word but certainly in deed.

We put other desires before Him.

We do not deny ourselves to put Him and His desires first.

We think we need others to satisfy or fulfill us.

We think we need other things to be satisfied or fulfilled.

How do we fail to love others according to 1 Corinthians 13:4-7. which is God’s standard of love? Be specific.

1 Corinthians 13:4–7 “4 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant 5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; 6 it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. 7 Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.”

We are impatient and ignorant when we do not get what we want. We can get VERY unkind and ungracious when our desires and wishes are not met in the time we want them met.

This is entitlement - we believe we have the RIGHT to a certain level and speed of service…and oh, you just wait and see what happens when we do not get it.

We grow envious of a benefit that another enjoys…and instead of serving them, loving them, celebrating with them, we begin to treat them like the enemy, trying to cheat and steal from them to get from them what they have and that we want.

We fail to humbly encourage and build up another by turning the attention to ourselves and lauding our own achievements and greatness.

We INSIST it is OUR WAY or NO WAY. We never yield. We never back down. We are never wrong. We always must have it our way.

We bear grudges, carrying our resentment around like the extra body fat it is. Instead of choosing forgiveness because of how much we are forgiven, we delight in holding on the hurt.

We are quick to abandon those who disappoint and hurt us instead of struggling through to rebuild and grow.

Do you get the idea?

There are limitless ways (or at least it feels like it) that we can violate this standard of love.

God is love, and our society is eager to embrace the concept. However, throughout Scripture God continually reveals Himself as a God of justice (Deuteronomy 32:4 “4 “The Rock, his work is perfect, for all his ways are justice. A God of faithfulness and without iniquity, just and upright is he.” ). Because of God’s justice, what does He do? (Nahum 1:3 “3 The Lord is slow to anger and great in power, and the Lord will by no means clear the guilty. His way is in whirlwind and storm, and the clouds are the dust of his feet.” ; Ezekiel 18:4 “4 Behold, all souls are mine; the soul of the father as well as the soul of the son is mine: the soul who sins shall die.” )

He punished wrong doing and evil. He will enact perfect justice while at the same time being merciful when truly humility and contriteness is present.

What do you deserve as the “wages” of your sin? (Romans 6:23)

Romans 6:23 “23 For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

Death - separation from God.

God is not only talking about physical death, but also spiritual death. To be spiritually dead is to be separated from God. You, as a sinner, deserve to be separated from God, spending an eternity in hell for your repeated violations of God’s holy law. His justice demands that He judge man by his thoughts, motives, attitudes, and deeds, and every person deserves God’s condemnation (Isaiah 53:6 “6 All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned—every one—to his own way; and the Lord has laid on him the iniquity of us all.” ; Romans 3:10–12 “10 as it is written: “None is righteous, no, not one; 11 no one understands; no one seeks for God. 12 All have turned aside; together they have become worthless; no one does good, not even one.”” ).

What has God done so that some who deserve condemnation do not receive it? (Titus 3:5-6)

Titus 3:5–6 “5 he saved us, not because of works done by us in righteousness, but according to his own mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewal of the Holy Spirit, 6 whom he poured out on us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior,”

He saved us. He sent His son to die, to shed his blood, to wash, regenerate, and renew us with His Spirit.

God’s mercy is great, though undeserved.

Who will receive God’s mercy rather than His justice? (Eph. 1:3-7)

Ephesians 1:3–7 “3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places, 4 even as he chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. In love 5 he predestined us for adoption to himself as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will, 6 to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved. 7 In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace,”

Those whom he chose, predestined for adoption as sons.

To whom does “us” refer in this passage? (vv. 4,5)

Believers, those whom have repented and believed.

According to whose will have you been saved? (v. 5)

God’s

Who took the punishment that the believer deserved? (Is. 53:5)

Isaiah 53:5 “5 But he was pierced for our transgressions; he was crushed for our iniquities; upon him was the chastisement that brought us peace, and with his wounds we are healed.”

Jesus - Son of God

It is clear that, although you deserve nothing more from God than to burn in hell, He gives you a gift you do not deserve. What is that gift? (Rom. 6:23)

Romans 6:23 “23 For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

Eternal life

See John 17:3 - Eternal life is MORE than just living and enduring forever.

John 17:3 “3 And this is eternal life, that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom you have sent.”

Because of God’s love and mercy toward you, from what are you set free? (Rom. 8:1)

Romans 8:1 “1 There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.”

Condemnation.

Instead of getting what you deserve, God’s judgment was poured out on Christ, who was condemned in your place. Through this act of infinite love, He willingly bestowed His mercy upon you. How incomprehensible that your Sovereign Lord chose you to be a vessel of His grace! “In love, He predestined” you to be His own child. (Eph. 1:4,5) Christ was condemned in your place. These verses have explained why you deserve nothing from God but His judgment. Therefore, you should not expect God to fulfill all your desires, expectations and demands, which you may view as rights. A “right” is what you have a just claim to. Therefore, as a sinner, deserving God’s wrath, you do not have the right to “good things” in your life, such as a nice home, a good-paying job, good health, a happy marriage, respect of friends and family or an easy, trouble-free life. Your sinful responses to life’s unpleasant circumstances usually reveal that you wrongly believe you have a right to a pain-free life and all that should accompany it. These studies do not address the “rights” that God chooses to freely grant you, though they are undeserved, such as the right to become the sons of God (John 1:12) or the right to the tree of life. (Rev. 22:14) Nor do these lessons address the rights that are ordained for human authorities, such as the God-given right of the husband to be the leader in the home or the right of the elders to have authority over the flock. Though God grants these positions of authority to some, it does not mean that a husband has a right for his wife or children to obey him nor does an elder have the right to have his flock obey him. Since He gives believers the choice to obey or to sin, God, who is all powerful, does not claim the right to have His children obey Him at all times. The “world system” and even much of Christendom teaches that you have many rights and that you deserve a happy, carefree life. The “world” asks, “Why do bad things happen to good people?” The true question from God’s point of view is, “Why do good things happen to bad people?” You don’t deserve good things, beginning with your salvation. Remember all“good things” and every gift are bestowed from the Father and should not be considered rights. (Jas. 1:17)

Not only did Christ bear your sin upon His body to present you with the gift of eternal life, but also He gave you another precious gift. Christ became sin on your behalf and transferred His righteousness to you. What have you become in God’s sight? (2 Cor. 5:21)

2 Corinthians 5:21 “21 For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.”

We become righteous

How does Christ’s finished work on the cross present you to God, the Father? (Col. 1:21,22; Eph. 1:4)

Colossians 1:21–22 “21 And you, who once were alienated and hostile in mind, doing evil deeds, 22 he has now reconciled in his body of flesh by his death, in order to present you holy and blameless and above reproach before him,”

Ephesians 1:4 “4 even as he chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. In love”

Holy, blameless, above reproach

Through Christ’s death and resurrection, from what have you been freed? (Rom. 6:4-6; Eph. 1:4)

Romans 6:4–6 “4 We were buried therefore with him by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life. 5 For if we have been united with him in a death like his, we shall certainly be united with him in a resurrection like his. 6 We know that our old self was crucified with him in order that the body of sin might be brought to nothing, so that we would no longer be enslaved to sin.”

Ephesians 1:4 “4 even as he chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. In love”

Sin and Death

Are you grateful for the gifts discussed in this lesson, or do you take them for granted and demand more?

Intellectually - Grateful

In practice - at times I live like it means very little.

Although you will continue to be disciplined and pruned, the blood of Christ has set you free from all condemnation, as well as from the bondage of sin. What a glorious gift is yours to be loved unconditionally by your Heavenly Father, to be forever His. Your Father, who purchased you at great cost, now wants to delight in your fellowship, to instruct you, to surround you with His love. Make this your prayer:

Psalm 51:10–12 ESV

10 Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me. 11 Cast me not away from your presence, and take not your Holy Spirit from me. 12 Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and uphold me with a willing spirit.

The Master and The Servant

Christ refers to Himself as “Lord,” which means He is your Master. Christ has purchased you with the cost of His very life because you are so precious to Him. He desires you to willingly commit your life to Him as His bond-servant. A bond-servant or bond-slave is one who voluntarily gives himself up to the will of another. As you were once a bond-slave to sin and Satan, you are now to offer yourself as a slave of Christ and righteousness. (Rom. 7:18,19) The Apostles Paul and Peter clearly define their new identity when they declare themselves “bond-servants” of Christ. (Rom. 1:1; 2 Pet. 1:1) The disciples James and Timothy also describe themselves as bond-servants. (Jas. 1:1; Titus 1:1; Phil. 1:1) As you can see from their own declarations, the early church fathers understood their new identity as servants of Christ who forfeited all rights to themselves and pledged obedience to their Master, who now owned them.

“ THE PASSION OF CHRISTIANITY IS THAT I DELIBERATELY SIGN AWAY MY OWN RIGHTS AND BECOME A BOND-SLAVE OF JESUS CHRIST.” OSWALD CHAMBERS

With what did Christ “purchase” you? (Acts 20:28)

Acts 20:28 “28 Pay careful attention to yourselves and to all the flock, in which the Holy Spirit has made you overseers, to care for the church of God, which he obtained with his own blood.”

His Own Blood

Who has the right of ownership over you as a believer? (1 Pet. 2:9; 1 Cor. 6:19-20)

1 Peter 2:9 “9 But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for his own possession, that you may proclaim the excellencies of him who called you out of darkness into his marvelous light.”

1 Corinthians 6:19–20 “19 Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, 20 for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.”

God. We have been purchased by Him with Jesus Blood

What did Job recognize that his Lord and Master had the right to do with his life? (Job 1:21)

Job 1:21 “21 And he said, “Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked shall I return. The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.””

Anything He wanted

What did Job realize he must receive from God? (Job 2:10)

Job 2:10 “10 But he said to her, “You speak as one of the foolish women would speak. Shall we receive good from God, and shall we not receive evil?” In all this Job did not sin with his lips.”

Both the good and bad.

Therefore, whatever you lack in this life or whatever you desire that is taken from you, cannot be demanded as a right. Whatever trial you are called to face, cannot be considered your right to have removed. A loving God has ordained the difficulties for your ultimate benefit. With deep compassion, the One who knows you intimately selects each trial to teach and to instruct you so that you may grow to be more like Him. Each form of suffering is also designed to create an opportunity for you to grow closer to God by becoming more dependent upon Him. Though deserving God’s condemnation, you, as a believer, are given many gifts: salvation, eternal life in Him, fellowship with Him, His Word to guide and direct, and the power of the Holy Spirit to overcome sin and to comfort. How are you utilizing these gifts in your daily life?

Spending unhurried time daily with Him and reflecting/meditating on these truths wen facing temptation.

Read 1 Peter 2:20,21.

1 Peter 2:20–21 “20 For what credit is it if, when you sin and are beaten for it, you endure? But if when you do good and suffer for it you endure, this is a gracious thing in the sight of God. 21 For to this you have been called, because Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example, so that you might follow in his steps.”

What does Jesus tell you He has done for you?

Suffered for us.

What does He expect you to do as His follower?

Suffer joyfully for Him.

What does He call you to do and for what reason? (Phil. 1:29)

Philippians 1:29 “29 For it has been granted to you that for the sake of Christ you should not only believe in him but also suffer for his sake,”

Suffer for his sake

Luke 9:23 tells you what you must do as a follower of Christ. command means to you. Explain what each

Luke 9:23 “23 And he said to all, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.”

“Deny yourself.”

Deny my wants/desires, “rights” and will to submit to His.

“Take up your cross daily.”

Die to self. Put to death all my desires and sinfulness.

“Follow Me.”

Imitate Him. Follow His example and do as he does.

As you can see, Christ says that following Him is a “heavy-duty” commitment. As your Master, He is not calling you to an easy, trouble-free life. Instead, He is calling you to a radical life of denying self-will, self-absorption and self-pursuit. He clearly calls you to give up your perceived rights and to become like Him through sharing in His sufferings. What a privilege to follow Him in denying self so He is able to lead you to emotional and spiritual freedom! God does not expect you to follow Him in your own power or through your own resources. Therefore, as a believer, He lives inside you, in the person of the Holy Spirit, to enable you to overcome sin and to obey Him. Philippians 2:13; 4:13 are promises of certain help. Philippians 2:13 “13 for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure.” Philippians 4:13 “13 I can do all things through him who strengthens me.” What does he promise to do for you in these two verses?

God works in us both to give us the will/desire AND the ability to obey. He also enables contentment in suffering.

Laying aside self-will to follow Christ should not be a frightening task. His ways of obedience are skillfully designed to help you, rather than to hinder you. If you hold to His Word (meaning to live biblically), what does He promise to do for you spiritually and emotionally? (John 8:31b,32)

John 8:31–32 “31 So Jesus said to the Jews who had believed him, “If you abide in my word, you are truly my disciples, 32 and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.””

Set us free.

Galatians 2:20 ESV

20 I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.

Crucify means to put to death by nailing or binding to a cross. To be crucified with Christ means“self”is put to death so that Christ’s power can reign within you. Having been crucified with Christ, you now have the ability to overcome the sins of unbelief, self-trust, self-sufficiency, self-gratification, fears and controlling strategies. You possess the nature of Christ, which gives you the ability to obey God. Death to self is death to your self-will and the acceptance of God’s will for you. The result is a broken spirit and heart that is pleasing to God.

Psalm 51:17 ESV

17 The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.

2 Corinthians 5:15 ESV

15 and he died for all, that those who live might no longer live for themselves but for him who for their sake died and was raised.

Psalm 51:12 ESV

12 Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and uphold me with a willing spirit.

Conclusion

Big Idea: The life of surrender requires that we yield up our “rights” to God.

The Path of Demandingness

The Path of Surrender

Judgment Deserved, Mercy Given

The Master and The Servant

Do you see now, why I say (so frequently) that the gospel is NOT just for unbelievers, but for us DAILY too?

Do you see why daily reflection upon the cross will foster humility and intimacy with Christ?

Application

How are we often guilty of being demanding of God?

We pray with expectation of God taking our problems and struggles away.

We get angry with God when our trials and struggles do not go away.

We fall into depression when our trials persist. (depression flows from our disappointment and discouragement which flows from the reality that believe we are entitled to a certain treatment, thus we make the demand, consciously or unconsciously, for that treatment)

How do biblical desires become wrong? When do they become wrong?

They become wrong when they mean more to us that God Himself; when they become idols.

When we respond sinfully when we do not get them.

How do our desires turn into demands?

When we listen to the wrong counsel and are led to believe that we deserve the desires we have.

When the desire becomes so strong that we think we cannot live without them, or cannot be happy without them.

When we are trapped in disappointment, discouragement, and depression, how do we change trajectory? How do we change our perspective?

We have to renew our mind on truth. We have to change our thinking regarding what is an actual right and what is not.

We have to change our expectations, change what we believe our “rights to be.”

We meditate and reflect upon the cross and what we rightfully deserve.

How does meditating and reflecting upon the cross help give us a proper perspective of our “rights?”

It reminds us that our sin rightfully deserved eternal death and separation from God in Hell. Our sin deserved THE WORST punishment possible.

It was only mercy that stepped into spare us that fate.

We have no “rights” considering that what we deserved was death.

In what way(s) does an honest evaluation 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 reveal our inadequacies of love? What does this evaluation reveal about what we rightfully deserve?

It reminds us of our shortcomings still.

Even after salvation, with the Holy Spirit, we still fight with the flesh in which we live and we fall short of God’s standard. It reminds us that though we are being sanctified and that God promises to finish what he began, we are still imperfect and we rely upon God and His grace to walk worthy.

THUS, we still cannot claim any rights of God. We remain dependent on His grace and mercy.

How does a reflection upon God’s mercy through Jesus help us keep a right perspective of our “rights?”

It reminds us that all we have is given on the goodness of God, not because we have earned it or deserve it.

What implications about our “rights” rises out of the reality of Jesus being our master?

He is lord of our lives. We are servants/slaves. We have no rights. We are owned by another and under another’s will.

How can you be purposeful about reflecting on the gospel this week? How will reflection help you to keep proper perceptive on your “rights?”

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