The Family

Ephesians 5:22-6:4

It wasn’t until 1998 that an article concerning the family was added to our statement of beliefs. In fact, most denominations did not include a statement on the family because there was very little controversy surrounding it. Historically both Christians and non-Christians have defined the family the same way.

We live in strange times. The world has redefined the family. It’s important that we are clear in what we believe the family is. As with all our other doctrines, the Scripture is our authority.

It is not easy for pastors to speak on this:

1) We are a family of families. That means people in our church family will have close relations with people who are:

Divorced

Living with people they are not married to

Homosexual

Transgender

A man of God loves his people. He doesn’t want to hurt anyone. But he is bound by Scripture to speak the truth.

2) It makes it difficult to grow a church. It would be a lot easier to grow a church if we ignored the attack on the family. If we just kept our mouths shut on the issue lots of people would be happy and many would not feel uncomfortable in the church.

3) Many pastors are dealing with issues in their own family as well.

1. Marriage.

“Marriage is the uniting of one man and one woman in covenant commitment for a lifetime.”

A. It is a picture of our relationship with Christ.

The man represents Christ.

The woman represents the church.

This is the reason the man is to lead, and the woman is to submit.

Both are equal in worth, intelligence, and both are equally created in the image of God. The order of the marriage is for the purpose of pointing people to Christ.

This is why the bible does not say women should submit to men. It says the wife is to submit to her husband.

The husband is to:

Love the wife

Protect the wife

Provide for the wife

The wife is to:

Submit to the husband (graciously)

Respect the husband.

B. It is a framework for intimate companionship.

Sexual intimacy is the most intimate part of a marriage relationship. It is reserved only for married couples. They are to enjoy this intimacy only with one another. God designed marriage so that this intimacy could be experienced.

We are sexual beings. There is nothing wrong with that. God has given us a channel to express ourselves sexually. That channel is the marriage relationship.

Hebrews 13:4

Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.

C. It is the means for procreation of the human race.

Children should be brought into this world through a man and a woman who are married. Children need a family. God ordained that marriage:

1) Be between a man and a woman.

2) Sex only be experienced by a man and woman who are married to one another.

He did this so that children would be brought up in a family. Children need a mother and a father. When we abandon God’s model we will see devastating consequences.

Far more likely to:

Live in poverty

Be on drugs

Go to jail

Not graduate

2. The Family.

“God has ordained the family as the foundational institution of human society. It is composed of persons related to one another by marriage, blood, or adoption.”

A. There is confusion surrounding the family. The world is now saying the family is a social construct developed to oppress certain people. Many universities are teaching this. If you hear your children or grandchildren using language like “the family is a social construct, gender is a social construct, etc.” beware. They are being brainwashed.

The family is God’s design. It is God’s building block of society. A healthy society is the result of healthy families. If you look back, you can see how the family has been slowly torn down through the years.

It was broken through divorce. Divorce has gone from rare to common.

It was abandoned through feminism. “We don’t need a man!”

It has been redefined through homosexuality. Family is now two moms or two dads.

B. Our country is conducting a social experiment that will have devastating consequences.

Children who are confused about who they are.

Lonely people.

People who have no one to help them in their golden years.

A hatred for men.

Poverty that results in overcrowded nursing homes and homelessness.

C. Family God’s way.

1. A married man and woman.

2. People related by blood (children, grandchildren, cousins, aunts, Uncles, etc.)

3. Adopted children.

3. Children.

A. They are created at the moment of conception.

Abortion is murder.

IVF is the creation of children.

We are not far from:

Using children in labs to create body parts.

Justifying the creation of life to save existing life.

Small children are the most helpless among us. They should be protected.

B. They are to be raised by a man and a woman who are married to one another.

Two men cannot properly raise a child.

Two women cannot properly raise a child.

I am aware that God has used single parents to raise children. But this does not mean it is the way it should be. God can work all things for good. But the standard is a mother and father raise their children together.

C. They are to be raised in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

Theya re not to find their own way.

They should be taught the Word of God.

They should be urged to give their life to Christ.

They should be disciplined in work and responsibility.

Men should teach their sons how to be men of God.

Women should teach their daughters how to be women of God.

The children have a responsibility to honor and obey their parents in the Lord.

4. Gender.

A. There are only two genders.

Scripture makes this clear.

Science makes this clear.

We affirm that gender is determined by biological sex not self-perception.

This is not difficult.

This is not scandalous.

This is common sense.

Gender is another one of the things our young people are being taught is a social construct. To teach that gender is fluid is an attack on the family.

B. You are your gender for life.

If a man transitions to what he perceives is a woman, he is still a man. He is not free to marry a woman. A marriage is:

A biological woman

A biological man

This should not be difficult, but this is where we are in America. Many of us warned this was coming once homosexual marriage was legalized.

We have men dominating in women’s sports now.

We have men using women’s locker rooms/restrooms now.

We have men dressed as women in high positions in our country now. We are becoming a laughingstock to the world.

We are allowing people to play make believe. We are going along with it. We will soon reap the fruit of our ridiculousness.

You might wonder what’s next. I think I know. I can see it clearly. I believe the next big attack on the family will be polyamory (not polygamy). This is the idea that a family can consist of two dads and two moms, three moms and one dad. There is no limit to the number of women and men in the relationship.

You’re not going to like what I say next. Some of you love shows like The Bachelor/ The Bachelorette. These shows are desensitizing us to the idea of polyamory. We are growing accustomed to the idea that a person can be in more than one intimate relationship at a time.

It is very likely some of you will know people who have a granddaughter that has a wife and a husband or something like that. Just as people caved on homosexual marriage they will cave on this as well. Don’t be one of those people. Stand strong on the Word of God.

The family is not a social construct. It is ordained by God.

Sexual intimacy is to be enjoyed only by a man and woman who are married to one another.

Children are to be raised in the Lord and in a Biblical marriage.

We are male or female and that is determined by biology not perception.

This is what we believe about the family. This is what Scripture teaches.