BETTER TO BEST: RESTORING THE FOUNDATION
BETTER TO BEST • Sermon • Submitted • Presented
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Leaning tower of Pisa. Many find beauty in the architectural design. The design looks great on paper. However, though beautiful to the natural eye, it had two substantial weaknesses. The foundation is only 9 feet and the soil is soft and unstable. So we see the result, the tower leans and must constantly have interventions to hold it up. The engineers and builders attempted to compensate for the problem by making one side shorter than the other.
What’s the point, when we don’t start with a firm foundation and proper support, we set ourselves up to fall apart. The Bible tells us that Abraham “was looking forward to the city that has foundations, whose designer and builder is God.” Hebrews 11:10
10 For he was looking forward to the city that has foundations, whose architect and builder is God.
26 Then God said, “Let us make man in our image, according to our likeness. They will rule the fish of the sea, the birds of the sky, the livestock, the whole earth, and the creatures that crawl on the earth.”
27 So God created man in his own image;
he created him in the image of God;
he created them male and female.
28 God blessed them, and God said to them, “Be fruitful, multiply, fill the earth, and subdue it. Rule the fish of the sea, the birds of the sky, and every creature that crawls on the earth.”
When we follow God’s blueprint and design for family and life, He desires to bless us and strengthen us.
When we have strong families, we raise kids in strength, and we build from a solid foundation that the culture and country can rely upon. When we do it our way or ignore key parts of God’s plan, we start to tilt just a little bit until it crumbles.
I believe it was representative Jeff Thompson of the ways and means committee shared that much of legislation and budget goes to government trying to fix bad decisions that could be mostly avoided by healthy families.
I. God’s Blueprint for Family:
a. Humans as Earthly Representatives. (26)
b. Equally valued. (27)
c. team rule. (28)
Every team has a captain and a coach. Jesus is our coach and we will see He designed it so men captain the family.
d. Differing roles.
If two people are exactly the same, there is redundancy and not efficiency. There would also be no way to serve graciously.
Why do I say that? Well serving graciously also means receiving graciously.
We can give things and receive things. However, receiving something you need, but could not create or do on your own requires receiving gracefully and also gratefully.
What do I mean. Well, if I can supply all I need on my own, I don’t have to learn to relate to others. I don’t need to learn gratefulness. However, if there is something in my nature that needs or relies on others to receive or become all I am intended to be, then I must learn to rely on others and to give as well. We were designed to need God and each other from the beginning. And when you receive something you need but could never produce on your own, you can never say, well, “I’ll pay you back.” When you have someone willingly serving you in that way out of love, such a service will truly be priceless to the receiver.
There are certain things that men and women can both do, certain things that men and women can’t do. Woman’s greatest super power is being able to carry, birth, and connect with a new imager of God.
There are a number of things that men and women naturally do at a higher quality in general than the other. You know it when you experience it and often it’s taken for granted and it’s often an unseen process.
But when you see it, you know it’s beautiful. Just think about when you see a female gymnast or ice skater, there is something about the power and fluidity of their movements and control that creates a sense of awe.
Men’s gymnastics have similarities but do not appear the same nor do they share all the events the same.
Men tend to take greater risks, not that women cannot, but they are willing to dig deep in the earth to bring out beautiful rocks or useful metals that get used to make life easier when applied to technology. Women can create things just as easily as men with raw materials. But there’s a nature in men more so to explore and gather raw materials especially when it’s a dangerous activity.
Jesus—the author, creator and sustainer of both old and new creations—affirmed, confirmed and restored the original created order so that, as His new creation, men are to lead by loving service and women are to joyfully support that leadership in their home and in the church.
7 Then the Lord God formed the man out of the dust from the ground and breathed the breath of life into his nostrils, and the man became a living being.
8 The Lord God planted a garden in Eden, in the east, and there he placed the man he had formed.
II. God’s Structure for Family:
a. He created the man first. (2:7-8)
Genesis 2:21–23 (NET)
21 So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep, and while he was asleep, he took part of the man’s side and closed up the place with flesh. 22 Then the Lord God made a woman from the part he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. 23 Then the man said,
“This one at last is bone of my bones
and flesh of my flesh;
this one will be called ‘woman,’
for she was taken out of man.”
b. Adam’s primary responsibility for Eve, the family. (2:21-23)
i. Ability and capability are not the issue here.
ii. Not about superiority, but division of responsibilities.
Timothy’s mother and grandmother very capable teachers when the Father did not lead spiritually.
I have been reminded of your sincere faith, which first lived in your grandmother Lois and in your mother Eunice and I am persuaded, now lives in you also. For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands. For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.” II Timothy 1:5-7 NIV
Concerning our translation from the Greek word, Interestingly when John wrote his gospel, he used the same Greek word used for Eve in the Septuagint. John uses this word 4 times and specifically for Jesus side. Luke uses it 1 times when the angel wakes Peter up striking his side.
It could be very reasonable be translated from Genesis, God took half of Adam or he halved Adam to make Eve. That would then mirror the statement that the TWO become ONE once again when God describes the union of husband and wife.
Make no mistake, the Bible never denigrates a woman's’ ability or contribution. But just as with men, the foundation of Biblical principles is as it supports worshipping and serving God and then priority to the family.
24 This is why a man leaves his father and mother and bonds with his wife, and they become one flesh.
III. The Purpose: Oneness.
Walking and working together.
1 In the same way, wives, be subject to your own husbands. Then, even if some are disobedient to the word, they will be won over without a word by the way you live,
7 Husbands, in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with a weaker partner, showing them honor as coheirs of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered.
Many mistakes come as couples assume you both want the same things. You both have the same background. You both have the same needs. Again as above there are needs that God designed only a man can truly meet for a woman and vice a versa.
God gave woman the super power of carrying another human being in their body and ultimately bringing the Savior Jesus to the world.
That doesn’t mean God can’t fulfill a person in singleness nor that they can’t be a valuable member of God’s plan but there will be certain things such a decision will make available to them that a married person cannot do (as Paul mentions) and vice a versa. It is simply God’s overall intention for humanity is to experience oneness in marriage.
b. It is not about control.
for one spouse’s convenience.
c.Communication, Consideration, and Care are the context, not our culture or experience.
Culture or bad experiences are not an excuse to argue against God’s design. You might as well as argue with the wind. When we ignore God’s design, we will see structural flaws that will spread to society and ultimately topple and fall. You can choose to do it your way but you will get your results.
What has been the result of making marriage meaningless in our culture? The rise of radical feminism where women have been pushed out of sports?Biological males now hold a number of women’s world records. Biological men have been awarded college scholarships that were originally created for women.
Where First Wave feminism called for equal standing and desired to curtail power hungry people? Now women are told to ignore the family and chase a career to the detriment of family? What has been the result emotionally and psychologically for a number of women in their 30s that were told career will fulfill them? A sense of loss and anxiety.
It’s similar to the problem men who put their all into their career faced at 40 or 50 when they realized all they had was their career and money. The world called that success, but they feel and emptiness.
The problem in Western society is not men excluding women, We now see boys falling behind girls.
Then there is the going it alone in children rearing we see encouraged by our culture. Single parenting by choice or cultural corruption:
In his book, Dr. Farrell points out that in 70 of the world's largest developed nations, boys have fallen behind girls. And he calls attention to two categories of boys that are now emerging in today's psychological literature: dad-deprived boys and dad-enriched boys.
Farrell writes, "dad-deprived boys are less likely to display empathy, be less assertive, depressed, have nightmares, talk back, and be disobedient. These boys hurt, and boys who hurt, hurt themselves and us."
But in the age of "toxic masculinity" and gender confusion, many would argue that fathers aren't necessary. To counter this point, one example Farrell cites is the role a traditional father plays in developing a sense of delayed gratification, especially in boys. And this trait becomes a critical building block for boys' mental health.
Boys with no father involvement and who don't have an opportunity to develop delayed gratification are prone to be addicted to things that provide a sense of immediate gratification. And Farrell suggests that kids with limited or no father involvement are at an increased risk for video game addiction, ADHD, and bad grades. They also tend to lack empathy, be less assertive but more aggressive, have fewer social skills, and are more likely to be obese. They experience more alienation and loneliness, drug addiction, anger, drinking problems, delinquency, depression, suicide, and prison.
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her
But after the Fall, conflict and strife was instituted into human interaction, and God’s grace was unveiled—a Messiah would come. Today, Jesus Christ offers grace to our troubled families.
d. Christ is the model for leadership and unity in the family.
The church and God’s family models is the antidote to our societies crumbling institutions for the family is the blueprint of a healthy society and Christ is the foundation.
What hinders spouses from viewing their needs and desires as one?
How can you be more considerate of your family's needs?
Have you developed good conflict resolution habits?
How do sinful desires affect your relationship with your spouse?
What can we say to those experiencing marital troubles?
Does your family need healing or revival?
What actions can you take to pursue God's design for your family?