Who's the Man?

Discussion notes

Who Defines Biblical manhood? What is the Biblical definition of marriage?

First, I just want to say thank you to the men’s ministry for allowing me to be a part of this. They didn’t have to; the fact that I’m a Pastor that happens to be male doesn’t mean that I am an expert on either.

It light of this, before I answer the question, I have a confession of sorts. My first impression of manhood came from my father, who became a father at 15…married my mother, joined the army to provide for his family. From him I learned the concepts of committment…sacrifice…protection & associated it with manhood. Important lessons, but none that were formal. And this is the confession: I have wrestled with this my whole life- and I’m still wrestling with it.

So for me, if you want to understand the purpose of a thing, you it’s Creator or to the owner’s manual- we have access to both

Genesis 2:7 “Then the Lord God formed the man of dust from the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and the man became a living person.” God makes the man

Genesis 2:15 “Then the Lord God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to cultivate it and tend it.” God gives Him a job. In the verses that follow, the man is given a mate; he is later told to be fruitful & multiply, and children. Okay, so it would seem that God intends for man’s purpose to be viewed in the context of family

Even before we exit the creation account some clear indications of man’s purpose emerge: he is to work, he almost immediately has a responsibility towards his family…but there is something else that I think gets overlooked. After the fall, Adam & Eve cover their nakeness and HIDE THEMSELVES. THe indication here is that they expected God’s visitation in the cool of the day. God spent time with His man…and His man spent time in His presence. This is the very essence of worship- to simply dwell in the presence of God. From this I see God’s call for men to worship, and to find purpose in serving their family. Now you might say, what if I’m not married? The family is the most basic component of a COMMUNITY. Men are called to serve their community.

What are our roles in the different “spheres” of life” (home, Church, community)?

How do we reclaim what was lost- if anything- and maintain it? (Discuss he challenges to manhood, the push for feminism and so called “toxic” masculinity)

Let me just state plainly that I believe- because I personally observe & experience it constantly- that there is war on masculinity. Traits that one has associated with a man over nearly all of human history- with the last 5 minutes of it being the sole exception- are considered toxic. Even in the Church, we have allowed a lack of understanding regarding our God given roles to open us up to attack, and allowing our roles to be diminished. Abusers are on both extremes; you have those who try to water down essential aspects of manhood- excusing us for personaly accountability & responsibility for others; we accept weakness and confuse it with vulnerability; because we are still meant to seeking something to fill the void that’s left when we abandon God’s design, we pursure our appetites instead of our purpose. The other side of this are those among us who try to use scripture in order to justify becoming abusive dictators.

I want to read a small section of Paul’s 1st letter to the church in Corinth, to point out the symetry of the relationship between the two sexes:

1 Corinthians 7:2“But because of sexual immoralities, each man is to have his own wife, and each woman is to have her own husband.”

1 Corinthians 7:3 “The husband must fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise the wife also to her husband.”

1 Corinthians 7:4 “The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; and likewise the husband also does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.”

So what about Paul’s other letter to the church in Ephasus, and the famous “submission” verse? Let’s talk about it!

Ephesians 5:22–23 “Wives, subject yourselves to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body.”

Fellas, don’t get to excited…because the same God that spoke to Corinth is speaking to Ephasus and to us today. tHe next few verse are for YOU:

Ephesians 5:25–31 “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless. So husbands also ought to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church, because we are parts of His body. For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”

Part of that sacrifice is to be prepared to defend. Defend in prayer, in declering God’s Words, and yes…prepared to use these hands if the situation calls for it. I think every man should be a beast- tamed by the Holy Spirit.