2024-05-05 What You Say Matters!

Well, we are continuing our series / / Misunderstood where we are talking about some of the ways that we can easily misunderstand what the Bible means, and that one of the reasons that Jesus came was help corrects our understanding, and to really bring a new approach, or lets say, His approach to the law. We talk about biblical interpretation and what it means when we read the bible, how do we understand and how do we interpret the meaning of Scripture, and yet we call the bible the Word of God. There are people who think that the whole of the bible is meant to be read literally, word for word, take it as you read it. But we have to understand that scripture is written in different styles. There is allegory, poetry, history, prophecy, law and instruction. And as I said last week, when it comes to the biblical writers I truly believe that they were as faithful as they possibly could be to interpret however it was that God gave them the words to write, and to the best of their ability they wrote those words for us to have and live by.

But then Jesus comes in and says, “Guys, you misunderstood a few things.” And what’s interesting is that John says, of Jesus, in John 1:1-4, 10, 14, / / In the beginning the Word already existed. The Word was with God, and the Word was God. He existed in the beginning with God. God created everything through him, and nothing was created except through him. The Word gave life to everything that was created, and his life brought light to everyone… He came into the very world he created… the Word became human and made his home among us.

That is important for us to remember, Jesus Himself is the very Word of God. But we also know God spoke to humans and humans wrote the bible. As 2 Timothy 3:16-17 says, / / All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right. God uses it to prepare and equip his people to do every good work.

The Bible is inspired by God, who through Jesus is the very Word of God himself.

So, especially when I read the Genesis account and I hear, “Let there be Light!” I hear John saying of Jesus, “God created everything through the Word….nothing was created except through Him.”

When Jesus speaks there is life. There is creative force. There is power.

And so if he inspired, and spoke to these leaders in the bible. Let’s take the Law for instance. Given to the people of Israel through Moses, considered to be the greatest leader and prophet of the people of Israel, then that law, inspired by God, spoken through Jesus, the Word, to Moses, is both powerful and creative, but also subject to the person, understanding, interpretation and descriptive abilities of Moses himself. He did the best he could with what he had available to him and I truly believe that he was as faithful to God as he could be. Which for me, means Scripture is trustworthy.

Because I understand. I am asking everyone I speak to, when it comes to matters of teaching scripture, to trust that I am handling the word of God with the utmost faithfulness, honesty and integrity possible. James writes in James 3:1, / / …not many of you should become teachers in the church, for we who teach will be judged more strictly.

Those who wrote scripture, although they did not know they were writing the bible, wrote with that same reverence and awe towards God that they were accountable for their words.

All that to say, we can trust scripture, and yet, Jesus comes in and says, “But don’t misunderstand it…”

So we’ve looked at a few topics so far. Anger, Revenge, Adultery, Divorce. And we just have a couple topics left, one this week, and we will wrap this series up next week. This week we are going to focus on Matthew 5:33-37, just a few verses, which are on the topic of vows, or what we say. If I’m giving this message a title this morning it is, / / What You Say Matters!

Let’s read the scripture this morning:

/ / “You have also heard that your ancestors were told, ‘You must not break your vows; you must carry out the vows you make to the Lord.’ But I say, do not make any vows! Do not say, ‘By heaven!’ because heave is God’s throne. And do not say, ‘By the earth!’ because the earth is his footstool. And do not say, ‘By Jerusalem! for Jerusalem is the city of the great King. Do not even say, ‘By my head!’ for you can’t turn one hair white or black. Just say a simple, ‘Yes, I will,’ or ‘No, I won’t.’ Anything beyond this is from the evil one.”

This morning I want to look at three different things here that Jesus is saying through this verse.

/ / Freedom and liberation for women

Reaffirming the third commandment

Reframing how we speak

So, let’s look at those this morning. The first one:

/ / 1. Freedom and Liberation to Women

And you might think. That’s so strange, how on earth do you figure that Jesus is liberating women by saying don’t make vows?

So, we know that interpreting scripture has to take into account time, influence and surrounding. At the time of Jesus, and even more so at the time of the law that Jesus is referencing, women were not given equal place, and actually, more treated like property than anything else. Again, we know that’s wrong, but also, we have to be careful in our judgement of past generations based on today’s moral and ethical understanding.

So, in referencing the Old Testament Law, Jesus is actually referencing multiple passages of Scripture. I’ve mentioned this before, but the Pharisees had come up with a set of 613 laws. I always remember that number because my area code growing up, where my parents still live, is 613. So it’s just stuck there.

But, that set of 613 laws isn’t found in one passage of scripture, like the 10 commandments are, it’s pulled FROM the breadth of scripture and put into what is called the Mitzvot, or each individual Mitzvah. Imagine trying to memorize 613 commandments, split into two categories of what you have to do, and what you are not allowed to do, and keep them all organized in your mind.

Oh, and don’t forget, James says in James 2:10, / / For the person who keeps all of the laws except one is as guilty as a person who has broken all of God’s laws. I mean, that’s the nature of having a set of rules, there are really only two options, you keep them, or you’ve broken them. And breaking one makes you a rule breaker, a law breaker. If that’s what it takes to be a sinner, then you are a sinner.

All of that to say, When Jesus says, “You have heard your ancestors were told…” For some people who know all the rules it would’ve been like a rolodex flipping through, “The law said that here, and here, and here…”

So, we have a few different places that there are similar things being said in the Old Testament law and depending on your bible, it might reference one, or two, or all of them. Some will mark what they feel is most relevant, others will put all of them.

As a thought, you might not have known this, but your bible will most likely have either in the margins, or at the bottom of the page, a reference to the other place that scripture is found. So, in one of my bibles at the end of verse 33 there is an asterisk, and at the bottom of the page there’s a whole list of what are called “Translation Notes”. If you go through that list and find 5:33, it says, “Numbers 30:2”. Meaning, what was said in that verse is referencing the Old Testament passage of Numbers 30:2. Now, when I look at my ESV translation on my computer, it not only references Numbers 30, but also Leviticus 19, 1 Timothy 1, Deuteronomy 23 and Ecclesiastes 5. So, depending on the extent of the reference and translation tools within your bible, you may see more or less of that. So, that’s just some food for thought in your bible reading time if you didn’t already know that.

Now, Numbers 30 is exactly why I am saying that Jesus is bringing freedom and liberation to women. When Jesus says, / / “You must not break your vows.” One of the scriptures that he is obviously referencing is Numbers 30:2, which says, / / “This is what the Lord has commanded: A man who makes a vow to the Lord or makes a pledge under oath must never break it. He must do exactly what he said he would do.”

But, as is often the case, there is more to the story. If we read that again we see that Numbers says / / “A MAN who makes a vow.” But Jesus says, / / “YOU must not break your vows.” Not speaking directly to men or women, but I would suggest, to both. He’s telling everyone this. Numbers 30 actually has just that 1 verse about a man keeping his vows, but then has another 13 verses describing all the ways a woman has to keep vows, but not just keeping her vows, but in relation to the men in her life.

If a woman is not married and living at home, her dad has to approve the vow. If dad doesn’t approve, the vow has no power, it doesn’t stand.

If she’s married and she makes a vow, her husband has to approve. If he doesn’t approve. The vow is not binding. The father or the husband have to either confirm or can nullify the vows made by the women in their lives. Not saying that’s right, just saying that’s what it was.

But, what does Jesus say? / / You’ve heard it said… “But I say, do not make ANY vows!”

I would strongly suggest, by taking vows and nullifying them entirely, in this area of their lives, where women would have been subject to a man’s approval, Jesus is liberating women.

Think about it. Jesus is standing in front a crowd and says, “You’ve heard that your ancestors were told: You must not break your vows.”

All the men shake their heads, “Yes, rabbi, we should not break vows. We know this well. It’s in many of our Scriptures.”

All the women beside their husbands or fathers are like, “I’m not even allowed to make a vow without him confirming it. I can’t even decide for myself…”

And then Jesus says, “But I say, do not make any vows!”

***WHOOOOOOOSH*** instantly freedom for every woman who felt under the thumb of their husbands and fathers about even making a promise to God to serve him.

Jesus is actively removing something from society that was used to oppress women, to keep them in that place of ‘owned property’ - “You can’t make decisions without my approval!” - gone!

/ / 2. Reaffirming the Third Commandment

The third commandment from Exodus 20:7, / / You must not misuse the name of the Lord your God. The Lord will not let you go unpunished if you misuse his name.

Now, Jesus isn’t referencing that scripture specifically, but remember that I mentioned Leviticus 19? Well, verse 12 says, / / “Do not bring shame on the name of your God by using it to swear falsely. I am the Lord.”

So, again, in this rolodex of rules and regulations, this is going to spring up on the category of making vows and falsely using the Lord’s name.

Now, we’ve seen this before, the Pharisees and religious leaders were pretty crafty. They were constantly trying to game the system. Of even in their conversations with Jesus, they would try to trap him into saying things, answering questions wrong, to try and get him into trouble with the law of Moses, which meant they would be able to punish him - they tried to stone him a few times. Or maybe they could get him in trouble with the laws of their Roman occupiers and then the Roman soldiers would deal with their problem with Jesus.

There was always this shifty business going on.

Well, it was the same with the law of Moses for themselves. Last week we were talking about divorce. They had used those laws to their advantage to divorce for whatever reason they wanted, and yet when we saw that Jesus was affirming marriage and saying, This was not what God intended.

No different with this idea of making and breaking vows. After saying, / / “But I say, do not make any vows!” Jesus continues and makes four statements:

/ / “Do not say, ‘By heaven!’ because heaven is God’s throne.

/ / And do not say, ‘By the earth!’ because the earth is his footstool.

/ / And do not say, ‘By Jerusalem!’ for Jerusalem is the city of the great King.

/ / Do not even say, ‘By my head!’ for you can’t turn one hair white or black.”

Now, to us, that doesn’t make all that much sense, does it? But to the people listening, especially the pharisees and religious leaders, this would have been very revealing to their own intentions and motives.

The people had gotten into a habit of making vows on anything other than God. “I swear by the heavens. I swear by the earth. I promise you, by Jerusalem. Listen, I’ll even swear on my own head, if it makes you feel better!”

Today we might say, “I swear on my grandmother’s grave…” or “Scouts honor, I’m telling the truth, you have to believe me!”

And the assumption was that if we’re swearing on this (heaven, earth, jerusalem, your head, your grandmother’s grave), we’re not swearing on God and as such we’re not breaking the law if we break the promise. Because what was important for the pharisees, and what did they as a result teach the people by their actions? Appear as holy as possible. Be righteous in everyones eyes. Flaunt your goodness in front of people.

So, to say, “I’ve never sworn on the name of the Lord!” maybe makes you seem more holy than you actually are.

Because what are they really trying to do? This gave them permission to break the promise. Because they didn’t swear by the name of the Lord, which would be breaking the law if they broke the promise. But because they are swearing on something else, if they break that vow, it doesn’t affect them with the law of Moses.

Or so they thought. This is where Jesus brings in the, “Don’t misunderstand…” when he says “But I say…” and to each thought he brings correction.

/ / Don’t swear by heaven, because heaven is God’s throne, they’re connected, the heavens are the Lord’s, so you’re still swearing by God.

/ / Don’t swear by earth, because that’s his footstool, they’re connected, the earth is the Lord’s, so you’re still swearing by God.

/ / Don’t swear by Jerusalem, without saying it, he’s saying that’s my city…

And you can’t even say, / / “By my head”, because who has providence over your head? You? Are you God? Can you turn even one of your hair back to black once it’s gone grey? No, of course you can’t. But do you know who can? That’s right. God.

Augustine wrote about this passage and said, “Now, what could anyone believe to be more truly his own than his head? But how is it ours, since we have no power to make one hair white or black? Therefore, if anyone wishes to swear even by his own head, he is bound to fulfill his oath to God, who eminently contains all things and is present everywhere.”

What’s Scripture say? Psalm 24:1, / / The earth is the Lord’s and everything in it. The world and all its people belong to him.

Even swearing by your own head is an oath before God.

So Jesus challenges all the ways that people have been swearing by something other than God’s name, and saying, “Listen, you’re still misunderstanding things here. This doesn’t get you off the hook.”

And using the Lord’s name, which is really what you’re doing if you’re doing these things, is as important as the third commandment. And no one would have wanted to use the name of the Lord falsely.

This is what we have to understand about this commandment. When Scripture says, “Do not use the Lord’s name in vain.” or how it’s written in the NLT, “You must not misuse the name of the Lord your God.” I believe it’s NT Wright that says, not using the Lord’s name as a swear word is the kindergarten lesson of this commandment. The true lesson is how we live our lives in relation to what we say we believe about God.

If I say that I am a follower of Jesus, what’s my life look like? Could someone tell that I’m a Christian by the way I act without me using my words?

There’s the joke, How do you know someone does crossfit? Because they’ve already told you.

How do you know someone’s a vegan? Because they brought it up 10 times in conversation. “Avacado toast, so gooooood.” come on, you’re lying to yourself. Just Kidding!!!

But / / what does your life look like in relation to what you believe without you having to say it out loud?

I think I’ve shared this before, but when I was in my early 20s I had to go back to my high school to get a copy of my transcript. I met with the guidance counselor who had been there when I was there and she asked what I was doing with my life and I said I had gone to a Christian Ministry School and was studying to be a minister. And her response was, “Oh, wow, I didn’t even know you were religious.”

And here I was thinking I had done a decent job by going to youth group and not being out drinking with my friends all of high school.

My life didn’t show what I believed. Admittedly I don’t know how much I actually knew what I believed then. But the thought remains.

If I say I believe the word of God.

If I say I’m a follower of Jesus.

How does my life represent that? Because by attaching the name of God to my life, and living in a different way, I am using his name falsely. I am misusing, or misrepresenting His name. One of the areas I probably see this the most is with “Christian” self-employed people that are willing to subvert the government and take cash under the table. Why? Do you really think you’re getting ahead by not showing integrity and honor?

Sure, none of us like paying taxes, but I figure, if I’m doing things right, and I have a good tax accountant, if I’m paying more taxes, that means I’m making more money. I would rather do it right and rely on God’s good grace than try to take matters into my own hands. “But everyone does it, Pastor Rob.” Not true. I don’t. And I know plenty of others who don’t either. My integrity isn’t worth it.

That’s just one example. But people that go out clubbing on Saturday and church on Sunday. Church on Sunday, drunk on Monday.

This isn’t meant to bring condemnation, but meant to bring into perspective what our lives are truly meant to embody. The very fact that none of us is perfect is the point. We all need a savior. So it’s not a matter of being perfect or getting it all right. But Jesus even said to his disciples in John 13:34-35, / / “…I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.”

We have a saying, the proof is in the pudding. Which means you realize the truth of something in your experience with it. “This is the best pudding ever!” only means something if I taste it and agree…

Multiple commentaries on this passage of scripture say that Jesus is also linking back to this commandment and how we represent, or use the name of the Lord in how we speak. So, don’t make vows. But also, don’t use the Lord’s name falsely.

And with that let’s go to our next point:

/ / 3. Reframing How We Speak

So, Jesus says, But I say, do not make vows! not to heaven, earth, Jerusalem or your head. And he then says, / / “Just say a simple, ‘Yes, I will,’ or ‘No, I won’t.’ Anything beyond this is from the evil one.”

A few points here this morning:

First, Jesus doesn’t just say that we have to say / / “yes” to everything. If you’ve ever heard a teaching about having boundaries, you know that boundaries mean you have to be able to say ‘no’. There are some people who would say that Jesus never said no, and if we are to be like Him, then we have to be willing to do whatever comes to us. That is bad belief. I would throw that right in there with Jesus saying, Anything beyond that is from the evil one.

/ / The fastest way to burnout and broken relationships is to say ‘yes’ to every thing and every one.

I want you to hear me very clearly here, because Jesus, without saying it specifically, is making a very big point here.

/ / Without the ability to say ‘no’, our ‘yes’ does not mean anything!

If you can’t say ‘no’, and you feel like you have to say ‘yes’ to everything, then your yes means nothing. It’s not out of love, out of service, out of compassion, or anything else, it’s out of demand and essentially making you a slave. You really don’t have choice.

And we know that God is a god of choice. In our Christian doctrine we believe that God displays both wisdom and patience. What that means is that in His wisdom we are given space and time to develop our own existence and to respond freely to His love. God’s wisdom is exercised both in righteous judgment and in patient love.

Peter actually says in 2 Peter 3:9, / / The Lord isn’t really being slow about his promise, as some people think. No, he is being patient for your sake. He does not want anyone to be destroyed, but wants everyone to repent.

So, if God wants everyone to repent, but he does not FORCE a yes out of us, then he has to be supremely patient toward us as we work through life and eventually come to a point where we are willing to say yes to his love and redemption.

But, we need to remember this for our own relationships as well. Not only is this an encouragement to think about what we say, let our yes be yes, our no be no, but what do we invite in our relationships? Do people actually feel like they can say ‘no’ to you? Do you react to people when they give you an answer you don’t want?

Are you married and instead of asking questions, you say things in a way that doesn’t even leave room for a yes or no. Obviously this has to be within reason. But we should be thinking about this. In our relationships, are you someone who honestly can receive a ‘no’?

Think about why Jesus is giving this sermon on the mount. He’s introducing the kingdom way of living. He’s inviting people to follow him, the king of the kingdom, as he teaches them how to live in the kingdom that will be, but is not yet.

This kingdom is yet to come. Jesus will return, and he wants to return to a people who are being faithful to the way of living that his kingdom invites.

So, if God is patient toward us, and allows us to say ‘no’ to him, he does not demand servitude, even to our own peril, how much more do we, as his followers, as those who are learning to live in His kingdom, need to learn how to respond in our relationships to those who say ‘no’ when we want them to say ‘yes’, even when we know it’s maybe not what’s best.

Second, one of the Old Testament scriptures, in that rolodex of scriptures and laws was from the book of Deuteronomy.

Deuteronomy 23:21-23 says, / / “When you make a vow to the Lord your God, be prompt in fulfilling whatever you promised him. For the Lord your God demands that you promptly fulfill all your vows, or you will be guilty of sin. However, it is not a sin to refrain from making a vow. But once you have voluntarily made a vow, be careful to fulfill your promise to the Lord your God.”

So, some of these verses that we’re reading in the Old Testament deal specifically with vows toward God, others involve vows or promises toward people. In the overall thought process here, because of how Jesus is framing his teaching, we can understand this to be true of both. Vows to God, vows to people.

If God wants us to keep our vows to Him, and he thinks this highly of it, then it is reasonable to think the same of vows toward each other. And although that might be a decent point, “make sure you follow through with your vows.” once we listen to Jesus, does it really matter, because what does he say?

Just don’t make vows at all.

I read this statement a couple years ago, and it’s stuck with me. It was someone teaching on integrity and honesty and he said, “Do you ever wonder why some people say, ‘Can I just be honest with you?’ or, ‘Now, I’m being honest with you when I say…’ like they aren’t usually honest, but for the next few moments they are going to be?”

And that has just stuck with me, I find I say it a lot less, because honestly….wait….let me remove that. Because, I want to be honest. I do my best to be honest. I don’t need to pre-empt what I’m saying is going to be honest if I am living my life to BE honest.

It’s kind of like Jesus saying, “Hey, they’re going to know that you’re my disciples if they watch how you guys act around each other.”

People will know you are honest if they look at your life and see that you act honestly, that you act with integrity. You won’t need to qualify that you’re being honest in the moment.

Jesus is essentially saying the same thing about how we talk to God and each other in the way of vows, promises and commitments. You don’t need to promise if you always follow through when you say ‘yes’. And in a world where we aren’t perfect. IF one a certain occasion you aren’t able to follow through because of extreme circumstances, that will actually make sense to the person. Unless you are dealing with young children that are still learning.

But even in that. Wouldn’t we want our children to grow up learning to be honest and to follow through with what they tell us ALL the time, not just the times they made a promise to do so?

So, / / our simply “yes” should be as powerful as if we say, “I promise…”.

But ALSO:

/ / You can’t break a promise if you never make it.

The law, which I think Jesus is really driving home here, says, / / “…it is not a sin to refrain from making a vow.” meaning - if you don’t make a vow, you can’t break it.

Deuteronomy is saying this: Vow, Don’t Vow…it’s voluntary, but if you vow, understand you are now bound to it.

Jesus is saying, Don’t put that pressure on yourself. Stop vowing. And stop using the heavens, earth, Jerusalem as an excuse like you promised but you think you can break it without consequence.

That’s foolish. Ever end up in an argument with someone and they say, “I said I would try, but I didn’t promise…”

Is it helpful? Not really, right?

In one commentary I was reading it said this, “One’s life should be sufficient to back up one’s words. A yes should always mean yes, and a no should always mean no.”

James actually picks this thought up and says while he’s writing about how to get along with each other, / / “But most of all, my brothers and sisters, never take an oath, by heaven or earth or anything else. Just say a simple yes or no, so that you will not sin and be condemned.”

It might sound foolish, but I deal with my 10 year old on this. She’ll ask, “Can I have….” And I say, “no” and she says, “So, does that mean yes?”

Remember where we started this morning. By the WORD, God created the heavens and the earth.

God takes our words very seriously because he’s given us power in them. Proverbs 18:21 says, / / Death and life are in the power of the tongue (ESV); those who love to talk will reap the consequences (NLT).

NT Wright says of Jesus’ words, / / “Better think before you speak, mean what you say, and learn the lesson that, in speaking, less is often more. Extra words, especially ‘strong’ ones, call into question the speaker’s basic truthfulness. If you need to add them, maybe we can’t rust you at all.

Throughout this chapter, Jesus is not just giving moral commands. He is unveiling a whole new way of being human.”

Is it any wonder that this topic comes right after the topic of divorce? Marriages rely on good communication, don’t they?

And the last thought here on Jesus saying, / / “Anything beyond that is from the evil one.”

Augustine seemed to think that this was in reference to the person who would demand of you to take an oath. That they won’t believe you unless you swear on something. And in that they are inviting you into this sort of word contract. He says, “The Lord’s prohibition of swearing is to be understood, therefore, as meaning that no one is to desire an oath as if it were something good…let a man restrain himself as much as he can, since he understands that swearing is not to be counted among the things that are good…This is the import of the saying, / / ‘But let your speech be, “Yes, yes”; “No, no.”’ This is good, and desirable.”

In the way of the Old Testament law, God was inviting Israel to live a certain way that would produce life. We really saw that last week. This is what God desires for his people, to live a certain way and live a good life. In that sense there is an invitation to vow to follow that way so that you live in life. Remember, Deuteronomy 30:19, Oh that you would choose life!

Choose the way God has intended for you to live and you will experience life.

Choose to follow your own way, your own desires, doing your own thing, and the consequences ultimately lead to death.

But in Jesus’ invitation to follow him rather than follow a law, a set of rules, his invitation is to be honest, true, trustworthy, full of integrity. So let’s not get caught up on vows to fulfill rules, but let’s honestly live and love and let our yes be a true and honest yes, and our no be ok, because we’re allowed to have that conversation in relationship.

God’s desire is for you and I to have life. So, use your words carefully. Speak less. Think more. And most certainly, like the pharisees, don’t make promises you don’t even intend to keep. Moreover, don’t make promises at all.

Just learn to live a life where your yes is yes because you work on being an integral person, and let your no be no, because you work at being honest and true, following the way of Jesus in His kingdom.