A Relationship Divided

Proverbs 18:22 KJV 1900

22 Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, And obtaineth favour of the Lord.

Can this be said of David? David had woman problems. One of the biggest problems was that he didn't "find" a wife, she was given to him. Where did David go wrong in this divided relationship?

He was a man after God's own heart and he should have been looking for a woman who was like minded! A good place to find a godly woman, who will be a godly wife, and a godly mother is in a home where God is the priority. The house of Saul was not a good place to find someone who put God way up on their list of priorities. There is a saying that comes to mind when I consider this passage…"The Apple Doesn't Fall Far from the Tree". Look with me in chapter 18: 17-20; 19:8-17…

Proposition: The biggest mistake that can be made in a marriage is failing to make God the ONLY priority.

Interrogative: Where do your priorities lie?

TS: There is a question everyone should ask before entering a relationship with another person "How much of a priority does God have in your life?" The answer to that question should decide on far that relationship goes. Today I want to examine the apple and the tree. If the apple is the fruit of the tree, then we must first examine…

The Tree 18:17-30; 19:1,9-11 (Saul)

Failed to forgive

While there are no "big" sins or "little" sins, we must admit, murder is pretty "bad"

I can't speak for you, but I'd rather someone lie to me, than kill me

Saul was a murderer

He may not have succeeded in killing David, but it wasn't for lack of trying

Don't be too quick to judge Saul, the Bible teaches if we have unforgiveness or anger towards another person, that is the same as murder!

Anger is the emotion which leads to hate

Hate is the state of mind in which murder is committed

At least twice Saul threw a spear at David and tried to "pin him to the wall"

In 19:11 we read that he sent "messengers" to David's house at night

What was the "midnight message"

"Saul sent us to kill you!"

Failed to be honest 18:17-19, 21-25

Saul promised David a wife

Chapter 17 Saul promised that to whoever killed Goliath he would give his daughter to the man as his wife

Chapter 18 Saul has opportunity to fulfill this, but is underhanded about it

"David, I'll give you Merab for a wife as I promised, but there's some more killing which must be done first. Go and fight the LORD's battles."

Saul wanted the Philistines to kill David for him

When David returned a victor, Saul had already given his daughter to another man

This was not only underhanded and deceitful, but hurtful as well

David had done everything, and then some, that Saul had asked of him

No doubt this act was intended to cause David shame

Saul took advantage of David's desire

David couldn't understand why Saul would treat him so badly

He wanted Saul to know he loved him and wanted desperately to please him

David was even willing to do anything to regain Saul's favor

Even if it meant marrying one of his daughters

Even if it meant sacrificing his own life in needless battles, he was willing to do anything to impress Saul

Here's the problem God was addressing:

David was concerned with what Saul thought of him, when he should have been focused on what God thought of him!

He wanted so desperately to please Saul he was willing to join himself to this ungodly family! David was a man after God's heart, he shouldn't have been bothered with what Saul thought of him. David failed to ask of his would-be father-in-law, "How much of a priority does God have in your life?" If he would have asked this question he would have known to walk away, but still he clung to hope that there was a way to please Saul. What about pleasing God?

What place is God in your relationship? Do you love God more than your spouse? More than your child? Let me tell you something parents, your child will put the same priority on God that you do! If you don't believe me, look at Saul's Daughter Michal, Saul is the tree, Michal is…

The Apple 18:20, 25-30; 19:11-17 (Michal)

She was an idolater

You can't deny that she loved her husband

When she hears that her father would send men to kill David, she begged him to leave for his life

The Bible is clear that she concocted a lie so that David might escape

The lie was bad enough, but the method was worse

The Bible tells us that she placed an "image" in the bed

Image = idol

Why did she have an idol?

She was an idolater!

A better question: Why would David marry and idolater?

She may have loved her husband, but she had no love for God

She was a liar

Did you see how naturally lying came to her?

She lied for David vv. 12-14

"He is sick"

No. He was gone! She had lowered down from the window

She lied about David vv. 15-17

Saul asked "Why has thou deceived me so?

Michal said, "David told me if I didn't let him escape he would kill me!"

Lying wasn’t just here second nature, it was her second l

We're not told how long their marriage had been to this point, but we do know that from this point, things were never the same. You can argue that she lied to spare David's life and that's not bad. Romans 3:8 "And not rather, (as we be slanderously reported, and as some affirm that we say,) Let us do evil, that good may come? whose damnation is just."

It's never right to wrong even for the right reason. You show me a person, be it man, woman, or child, who finds it easy to tell a lie and I'll show you a person who has not made God a priority! Where would Michal learn this behavior? At home, from her parents. Her dad? For sure, but not only. Saul was busy with running the kingdom, Michal was home with her mother most likely. Do you know what this tells us? Neither parent bothered making God a priority.

What about you? Can this be said of you, that God is not a priority? I hope not, but be honest with yourself, "How much of a priority is God in your life?"

Conclusion: Through all this mess, Saul trying to kill David, Michal lying for David and about David, through all of this, God was there saying "Trust me". The most difficult job on the planet is being a parent. The most important job on the planet is being a parent. I'm not going to stand here and say that being a mother is more important than being a father, and next month I won't dare say being a father is more important than being a mother. Both are equally necessary to a child's health and wellbeing.

What is most important, what is most needed, is for your children to see you making God a priority. Not just on Sundays, but each day of the week. M

Not all of us are married, Ok, what about it single person, is pleasing and serving God your primary concern in this life? NO? Then what is? Whatever just came to your mind right now is what you need to confess to God today.

Maybe today God is not your priority because you've never trusted His Son as your Savior. You say, "What does that mean preacher?" Let me tell you. Every person who has ever lived has a God-shaped emptiness in their lives. We do a many a good thing to fill this hole, but we can never fill it up. For God to allow us into heave we'd have to meet His standard, which is perfection (Matt. 5:48). NO amount of work or good deeds could ever bring us into God's favor (Ep. 2:8-9) because we're all born sinners Rom. 3:10,23). Because we're sinners we are separated from God and deserving of hell (Rom. 6:23a). If that was all there was to it it'd be bad, but Romans 6:23b tells us "But the gift of God is eternal life through Christ Jesus our Lord". How can we have eternal life? John 3:16, Romans 10:9,13. Faith is the key that opens heaven's door. Faith is trusting in what Jesus Christ did for you on the cross. Faith is understanding that there is nothing you have done which cannot be forgiven, and faith that nothing you can do can earn your salvation. What can save you? The shed blood of the Savior! Won't you turn to Him today?