The Proverbs 31 Woman pt 2
Mother’s Day 2024 • Sermon • Submitted • Presented
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Welcome
Grace and peace
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My name is Jeff Brousseau and I am the pastor here at Antioch Fellowship and I am humbled and thankful to be called to the role of pastor for this local body.
It is a privilege to be standing here this morning in the grace and presence of God speaking to you all this morning.
I pray that you all have had a wonderful, relaxing and peaceful week.
Please open your Bibles to Prov 31
1 The words of King Lemuel, the oracle unto which his mother disciplined him:
2 What, O my son? And what, O son of my womb? And what, O son of my vows?
3 Do not give your excellence to women, Or your ways to that which blots out kings.
4 It is not for kings, O Lemuel, It is not for kings to drink wine, Or for rulers to desire strong drink,
5 Lest he drink and forget what is decreed, And pervert the justice of all the afflicted.
6 Give strong drink to him who is perishing, And wine to those whose soul is bitter.
7 Let him drink and forget his poverty And he will not remember his trouble any longer.
8 Open your mouth for the mute, For the justice of all those passing away.
9 Open your mouth, judge righteously, And render justice to the afflicted and needy.
10 An excellent wife, who can find? For her worth is far above pearls.
11 The heart of her husband trusts in her, And he will have no lack of gain.
12 She deals bountifully with him for good and not evil All the days of her life.
13 She searches for wool and flax And works with her hands in delight.
14 She is like merchant ships; She brings her food from afar.
15 And she rises while it is still night, And gives food to her household And a portion to her young women.
16 She makes plans for a field and buys it; From the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard.
17 She girds herself with strength And makes her arms strong.
18 She senses that her gain is good; Her lamp does not go out at night.
19 She stretches out her hands to the distaff, And her hands hold fast the spindle.
20 She extends her hand to the poor, And she stretches out her hands to the needy.
21 She is not afraid of the snow for her household, For all her household are clothed with scarlet.
22 She makes coverings for herself; Her clothing is fine linen and purple.
23 Her husband is known in the gates, When he sits with the elders of the land.
24 She makes linen garments and sells them, And gives belts to the tradesmen.
25 Strength and majesty are her clothing, And she smiles at the future.
26 She opens her mouth in wisdom, And the instruction of lovingkindness is on her tongue.
27 She watches over the ways of her household, And does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children rise up and bless her; As for her husband, he also praises her, saying:
29 “Many daughters have done excellently, But you have gone above them all.”
30 Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, But a woman who fears Yahweh, she shall be praised.
31 Give to her from the fruit of her hands, And let her works praise her in the gates.
Last week I preached a Mother’s Day message on Proverbs 31, and because there is a lot of information and it was Mother’s Day, I wanted to keep it a good length and this week, we will finish it up.
Many of you may have heard messages on this chapter before and I know that Mother’s Day was last week, but as you’ve heard me say before, this has been a year of kinda going back to basics and just like other messages I have spoken about such as: sanctification, commitment, courage, justification, joy, assurance, running the race of faith, self-denial, this message on God’s standard for women is not any different.
Sometimes, it’s good to just go back to the basics to prevent ourselves from being complacent.
Many people aren’t a fan of doing that, but based on the state of Christianity in America, maybe they should be.
So, I mentioned last week, that what unfolds in this passage is just six features that we’ll extract.
We saw the first one last week and started feature number 2
Her character as a wife
Her devotion to her family as a homemaker,
Her generosity as a neighbor,
Her influence as a teacher,
Her effectiveness as a mother,
And her excellence as a saint.
What we saw emerging in just the partial study we’ve done is this wonderful picture of the really excellent wife/mother, God’s standard.
Let’s continue in verse 16 and finish the rest of our portrait.
Up to this point, we’ve seen, this godly wife/mother working hard for her family and though it is hard work, she enjoys it because it is worth it because of her devotion to them.
In verse 16 Prov 31:16
16 She evaluates a field and buys it; she plants a vineyard with her earnings.
She finds that a field is for sale, which can add to the productivity of the family, add to the economy of the family, and she buys it.
And you say, “In those times, where did she get the money?”
Well, it says in verse 16, “with her earnings.”
And she plants a vineyard in it.
Where did she get any earnings?
Down in verse 24, Prov 31:24
24 She makes and sells linen garments; she delivers belts to the merchants.
The word tradesman or merchant in Hebrew is כְּנַ֫עַן - Canaan
Canaanites, Phoenicians.
The Phoenicians were the sea going people who literally took the trade from the east and scattered it all over the west in the Mediterranean countries.
And so she was producing goods to sell.
She was producing linen garments and belts or sashes, and selling them.
She probably had some others involved.
So, this is a busy lady.
Up in the morning grinding corn, preparing meals, during the day she’s working for her own family and she’s also working to produce something in this little industry along with the maidens who were there no doubt assisting her, and they were selling it to the tradesman.
Again, as she was using this I might say for capital items, she didn’t do this to contribute to the general flow of the family economy.
The husband was the provider and that was enough, but she was setting this aside and setting it aside and setting it aside, and when enough was set aside and she found a field she bought the field to enhance the economics of the family and purchased the necessary plants and created a vineyard.
Very enterprising woman.
Nothing wrong with being this enterprising; this is wonderful, this is part of the ideal woman.
She wants to assist the family, not only in the tasks that need to be done day by day but in the development of new opportunities.
So she, in making some money, it indicates here, has not enhanced her lifestyle.
She has not used that money made in the industry to somehow raise her standards of living, but rather has set it aside and set it aside and set it aside until enough is there for her to buy a field, and a vineyard can be planted there, making wise investments on behalf of her husband.
This is a lesson to teach future generations.
Just because you have some money doesn’t mean you have to go out and spend it.
The standards of living don’t have to raised to keep up with your friends.
And through all of this, verse 17 says, Prov 31:17
17 She draws on her strength and reveals that her arms are strong.
That then is not to say that she becomes swol by lifting weights.
What you have here is a woman who’s very busy, very enterprising, full of energy, and physically she’s healthy, physically she’s strong.
But it’s not just talking about that.
She becomes a strong woman in the sense of strongly committed to the duties and tasks that are given to her, and I do think there’s an element of physicality in this. You know, the best way to be healthy is to exercise.
The best way to exercise is to devote yourself to those things which are essential and those things which are beneficial to others.
She works for the good of others, that’s how she strengthens herself. Her health is then strengthened by her walks and by her work, by her diligence.
Her strength is the result of giving herself away to her household.
And verse 18 sums it up.
This is motive. Prov 31:18
18 She sees that her profits are good, and her lamp never goes out at night.
The bottom line here is not that she’s seeking something for herself, she’s not trying to elevate her sense of self-worth, she’s not trying to raise her lifestyle.
She’s doing it because it’s good.
We can also say this for that verse “She sees that all the product of this is good.”
She’s motivated by the sheer goodness of it.
It’s good to provide this for the family, it’s good to have the family clothed, it’s good to feed them in this way.
It brings them joy. It’s good to have a husband who trusts in her, this is good.
Spurred on, not by ego, not by self-indulgence; spurred on by the inherent goodness of what she does.
She does what is good, not so much for herself but for others, but she understands the joy of knowing that she’s doing good and receiving the benefit that comes back from it; the love of her children, the love and adoration of her husband.
In fact, she’s so motivated by the sheer goodness of this and the reward from her family and from God for that goodness that at the end of verse 18, it says, “Her lamp never goes out at night.” Prov 31:18
It’s so good that she just does it even after the dark sets in. The dark sets in say at 6:00 or whatever, she still finds work for the hours of darkness, motivated by the sheer goodness of what she does.
Emerging from this text, as we see, is a good and godly woman.
This is a woman who’s doing what is sincere under the Lord.
This is a woman who gives herself away for her husband, who gives herself away for her children.
Someone may ask her:
what does it take to be like this and she’ll reply - everything you have
In verse 19 picks up the idea of the wool and the flax from verse 13, “stretches out her hand to the spinning staff, and her hands hold the spindle. Prov 31:19
19 She extends her hands to the spinning staff, and her hands hold the spindle.
She has to spin that into thread and, of course, then she has to weave it into cloth, then she has to cut it and sew it into a garment.
But she’s motivated by the goodness of all of this.
And verse 21 says, Prov 31:21
21 She is not afraid for her household when it snows, for all in her household are doubly clothed.
She’s not afraid when the winter comes because everybody’s clothed in scarlet.
It doesn’t snow a lot in Israel but it probably snows every other year or so in Jerusalem.
And if you’re in Jerusalem it can get very cold in the winter and it can snow there and does.
She thinks ahead.
The only way they heated their homes in the land of Israel in ancient days was a flat pan full of hot coals just radiating the heat through the house.
And so, you needed something to keep yourself warm.
The cloak that they wore in the cold days would be the cloak that they wore to sleep at night, along with other things.
They would turn that into a blanket on the bed.
She was ready for the snow.
They used scarlet or something very dark, because you know dark clothes, dark wool garments absorb the heat.
But it wasn’t black.
It was scarlet, and scarlet means that she had a little bit of an eye for beauty.
Scarlet was considered a beautiful and rich color and so she makes garments, not just functional but even beautiful, dignified in color.
You say, “Well, a woman who does all this, she must be pretty worn out. Giving herself to her family like that, she must not have time to take care of herself.”
Well, verse 22, Prov 31:22
22 She makes her own bed coverings; her clothing is fine linen and purple.
She doesn’t forget the beauty, the things that make her beautiful, but there’s more there than that.
See that first line? “She makes her won bed coverings.”
That refers not so much to her clothing but to beds in the house, pillows, mattresses, bedspreads, blankets, coverings.
She makes a beautiful bed is really what it says and when those women in those days made a bed, they made a bed.
They made the mattress.
And then they made the cloths, and then they made whatever, the duvet or whatever you call it, or the comforter or the bedspread or whatever.
And then they made the pillows and they made a lovely bed.
And then also, it says that she had “clothing is fine linen.”
It wasn’t the coarse kind of linen; it was that more carefully and tightly spun flax, that fine, fine, almost silky linen, so that when she got up and dressed herself she was refined and she was lovely.
And she made that linen purple because purple is a beautiful and rich color.
She enhanced her own beauty, she understood that God is a God of beauty, and she understood that God has made us to appreciate beauty, and a man may have a diligent and busy wife but he also wants to have a wife that’s caring about her own self in the beauty with which God has graced her.
There’s no pretentiousness here, there’s nothing about overdoing it, but she was refined in the way she dressed.
So here is this amazing woman, who is busy and working with her hands and staying up after dark and getting up before light, and yet with all this labor and all this self-sacrifice she is concerned about presenting herself in the beauty of adornment with which God has so graced women.
She manages it all, and as we saw in verse 24, Prov 31:24
24 She makes and sells linen garments; she delivers belts to the merchants.
She is some homemaker, isn’t she? She is an amazing woman.
Now remember, this is not every woman, this is that woman who is the ideal; this is the goal to which you stretch as a woman.
Thirdly, we want to look at her generosity as a neighbor.
We have seen her role as a wife and a homemaker; thirdly, her generosity as a neighbor.
Go back to verse 20, Prov 31:20
20 Her hands reach out to the poor, and she extends her hands to the needy.
This is like the widow, you remember in the New Testament, described by the apostle Paul who goes on the list in the church, the one who has cared for other widows and orphans.
This is a very great responsibility for godly women.
She demonstrates not only a special devotion to her own home but compassion toward those not fortunate enough to be in her home.
The poor, the destitute, she extends her hand to them.
That is, she gets personally involved in their lives.
Her hand might have a garment, her hand might have food, her hand might have a bed, a blanket. “She extends her hands” – again – “to the needy.
The idea here is of friendliness.
She doesn’t ship things to the poor and the needy, she puts her hands out with them, she reaches out.
She again is unselfish, she is sacrificial, she’s compassionate.
Fourthly, in looking at this ideal woman, we see her influence as a teacher.
Verses 25 and 26 and here’s where teaching begins, Prov 31:25-26
25 Strength and honor are her clothing, and she can laugh at the time to come.
26 Her mouth speaks wisdom, and loving instruction is on her tongue.
If you’re going to be a teacher you start with character, don’t you?
Far more important than what you say is who you are and she is clothed with spiritual strength.
Strength here has to do with an unwavering, uncompromising resolve.
It has to do with that kind of character that is consistent, strong, doesn’t fall to temptation, isn’t decisive, doesn’t waiver, isn’t up and down, in and out, sometimes doing what’s right, sometimes doing what’s wrong.
This is a strong, spiritual character that is being described here.
And the word here - another word that’s very important is the word honor, or your Bible may have dignity or majesty.
That word honor refers to something which is elevated above the common.
When we say a person has honor, we’re saying they’re above the common standard
This is not a woman like every other woman; this woman rises above in terms of her character.
She has a strength, a fortitude in her character that is noble, that is honorable.
This is the power of true character, consistent character.
Her life is above the standard of most.
And verse 25 says, “she can laugh at the time to come” or we can say as the LSB and NASB says “She smiles at the future.”
That’s what character will do for you folks.
You be a woman of character, for that matter, a man of character
– you live in your family in spiritual consistency, in spiritual honor, you live a godly life, and you can look at the future and smile.
You’re not going to have to worry that your spouse is going to leave you.
You’re not going to have to worry that your children are going to turn their back on you and break your heart.
Her character, her virtue, the dignity of her spiritual commitment, the consistency of it means she could look at the future and have no fear.
She could look at the future and know that she could continue to have the love and affection and trust and faithfulness of her husband.
She could look at the future and not fear the loss of her children, the disaffection of her children.
Being able to smile at the future, that is a very, very great thing, isn’t it?
She’s pure, she’s faithful, she delights in giving away her life for those in her family, and she looks at the future and smiles because she knows what the return is going to be on that investment.
She’s planned well.
And then having that character as a foundation, verse 26 says, “Her mouth speaks wisdom.”
And I’ll tell you, her family listens, they listen, yes, even her husband
Her character is her credibility; she opens her mouth in wisdom.
“Her mouth speaks wisdom, and loving instruction” – in Hebrew, instruction is תּוֹרָה Torah, the law – “is on her tongue.
What does she teach?
She teaches, חֶ֫סֶד chesed in Hebrew, loving kindness, grace, mercy.
The father teaches theology and principles and business practices, et cetera, and the mother teaches kindness and mercy and graciousness and gentleness, and compassion.
She teaches it because she lives it.
This is the balance.
It’s a wonderful balance and she teaches the things that are manifest in her character.
Fifthly, you come to her blessedness as a mother.
We’ve seen her as wife, homemaker, neighbor, teacher, and here is her blessedness as a mother.
Quickly, verse 27 and 28, Prov 31:27-28
27 She watches over the activities of her household and is never idle.
28 Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also praises her:
That’s just rehearsing again the fact that she’s not lazy; she takes care of her house and here comes the blessedness back.
In verse 28, “Her children rise up and call her blessed. Her husband also praises her.”
You see that’s why she can look at the future and smile; she’s made the kind of investment that brings that return.
Her children rise up, as her children grow, as they get older, as the years go by, they reverence her, they honor her, they hold her in higher and higher esteem.
Is there a greater reward for a mother then that?
And her husband also, because she has so trustingly given her life to him, praises her.
He praises her by saying in verse 29 - Prov 31:29
29 “Many women have done noble deeds, but you surpass them all!”
You are the greatest honey, you are the greatest.
You’re better than any I’ve ever seen.
As she becomes older and the children grow and have their own children, they endeavor to raise them the way she raised them.
She is constantly before the eyes of her children.
Her tender guidance, her wise counsel, her loving discipline, her holy example, her hard work, her unselfish giving, they never forget and they live it out in the next generation.
And her husband rejoices in her and praises her above all others.
And finally, her excellence as a saint.
The underpinning of all of this is her spiritual life.
It comes at the end but it belongs at the beginning.
As I said times have changed and the role of the wife/mother have also changed, and many of these things we read in these verses aren’t done anymore, so there is some latitude on how you apply these verses, but verse 30 is is straightforward and non-negotiable:
Verse 30, Prov 31:30
30 Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord will be praised.
That’s face and features.
They mean nothing in the big scheme of things.
Beauty of form, graceful form can be deceptive.
Beauty of face can mean absolutely nothing in terms of character.
Charm and beauty have no real value, “but a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.”
Look for a woman who fears the Lord, be a woman who fears the Lord.
This is to be a true worshipper. “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.”
Proverbs 9:10.
This means reverencing God, reverencing His revelation, His Word, His Son.
That’s the core of her character.
She is a pure, true, worshipper of God.
And out of her love for God and out of her reverence for God is fidelity to her mate, is commitment to her home, is love for the needy, is wisdom taught to her own and is the fulfilling of the calling of a mother.
She seeks no praise, but she gets it, “She will be praised.”
Finally verse 31 - Prov 31:31
31 Give her the reward of her labor, and let her works praise her at the city gates.
In other words, give her back the good that came out of her hands to others and let her receive the praise she deserves.
This kind of woman almost seems impossible if not ridiculous in our day, but God’s standard never changes and this is that which every Christian mother and wife needs to set as the ideal and ask God for the grace to pursue it.
By the way, if you’re looking at your life and saying, “I’ve been going the wrong direction,” well, today’s a good day to start in the right direction.
God is the God of new beginnings, isn’t He?
And this is the path for you to walk in.
Let’s pray
Father, we thank You for Your Word. It is such a clear and concise and practical and helpful description of what You want. And how glad we are, oh God, that you have given us Your Holy Spirit to strengthen the women, the women who belong to Christ so that they can set this as a goal and move toward it. It is the prayer of our hearts, Lord, that You would raise up such godly women by Your Holy Spirit’s power, by the work of the Word in their lives. Father, we thank You for this Word to us this morning in Christ’s name, Amen.
Let’s pray.
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For our benediction this week, I would like to read from Num 6:24-26
24 “May the Lord bless you and protect you;
25 may the Lord make his face shine on you and be gracious to you;
26 may the Lord look with favor on you and give you peace.” ’
This week, love Jesus, love people, and love life
I love and there is nothing any of you can do about it.