Ask. Seek. Knock.

Asking is the way of the Kingdom. This is true of our relationship with each other as first modeled by our relationship with God. God creates and divinely sustains free will, yet we constantly attempt to remove it from one another through condemnation, control and manipulation. We are to "ask" one another as our first, primary, and usually only intrusion... and ask the Father concerning one another... just as we wish people would do for us (v12).

Hide and Seek

We’ve had some good times playing hide and seek in the church. Some of the places people have hidden would freak you right out.

Tucked between a shelf and the wall.

How about in the freezer?

Or in the lazy susan corner cupboard thing?

Hayden hiding. Some say he is still there.

At the end of hide and seek, when the “seeker” is ready to give up, there are magic words that you can shout and everyone comes out. Anyone know them?

Olly Olly Oxen Free.

I was curious so I looked this up. No one knows for sure where it comes from or what it means. One theory is that it was originally “all ye, all ye, outs in free.” But everyone can come out without penalty.

So, today, I give you the sweet gnosis. The secret knowledge. The way to Ask for Anything and God has to give it to you! Maybe.

Ask for Anything

Matthew 7:7–8 ESV

7 “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. 8 For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened.

MAN, this sounds like a Promise, doesn’t it???

And it sounds like a promise in asking from God. Because of the next verses:

Matthew 7:9–11 ESV

9 Or which one of you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone? 10 Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a serpent? 11 If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!

So… it sounds like Jesus is promising that God will give us whatever we ask for!

However… anyone who has asked God for some things has some questions for Jesus, here.

What about when we ask for healing and it doesn’t come?

What about when we pray for change, and we see no change?

What about when God doesn’t give… even literally asking for bread or fish, asking for good things, simple things?

This seems like a false promise. How do we reconcile this?

Resolve the “promise”

We could first restrict what is “asked.” If we only ask things God already promises to give, we are safe. Things like “salvation” or “the Holy Spirit” or the gifts of the Holy Spirit. Ask for only things God has promised elsewhere and this is certainly true!

Only challenge is, that’s not quite so clear in the text.

Alternatively, we can focus on the method of “asking.” This is a “present active imperative” which indicates continued regular action. That’s certainly true of prayer, continuous prayer, asking, “Pray Until Something Happens!” There’s a whole lot of truth in there.

But that can be twisted into something almost abusive. If you haven’t gotten what you are praying for, you must not be doing it enough, or praying with enough faith, or there’s sin in your life. All the answers of Job’s friends, right? Jesus doesn’t say that.

So either we water down the promise… or we make it our fault for “doing it wrong?”

Many people come to Jesus Sermon on the Mount and just find it to be an impossible standard, full of idealism that falls short of reality. What’s happening here.

Once again, you know what’s coming. I don’t think this is a stand-alone passage, and we do damage when we cut it out of context. If 7:1-12 is one cohesive thought, one teaching about life together, what changes here?

Judging, Asking, and the Golden Rule

Again, in context, this is about primarily about how we interact with humans.

Jesus has just said: “Stop judging, and get the plank out of your own eye before trying to ‘help’ your brother.”

Jesus has just said, “Stop pushing pearls on pigs.”

And he is about to say “therefore… do unto others

Matthew 7:12 NASB95

12 “In everything, therefore, treat people the same way you want them to treat you, for this is the Law and the Prophets.

(The NASB capture the “therefore”) What’s it there for? It comes straight out of asking.

So if we look at “not judging others,” not fixing others, not pushing pearls on pigs (forcing good things on those we condemn and look down on)...

It’s all one thing, 1-12 at least, but really the whole sermon. Stop judging, stop condemning, stop pushing… instead ask… isn’t that what you would want?

This principle of “asking” comes as the practical application, the underlying principle of the Golden Rule.

Don’t judge. Don’t fix. Don’t push good things on those who aren’t ready...

Instead… ask. seek. knock.

It starts with “how we treat people.” It ends with “how we treat people.” The therefore implies that the part that comes before it is all about “how we treat people.” So the primary application is to “how we treat people.”

Ask… it will be given.

Seek… you’ll find.

Knock… doors open.

Is that a promise of how it will always be… or a picture of how life usually works? Let’s look at Jesus’ examples.

Example of Father and Son

Jesus illustrates this principle in the family first:

Matthew 7:9–10 ESV

9 Or which one of you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone? 10 Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a serpent?

This is already a contrast to where we usually take these verses. Is the son asking for one Billion dollars? No. Could the father give that? No, probably not. It’s already clear that Jesus isn’t giving a usual promise, he is illustrating normal life. The son asks for a “normal” good thing, and the father delivers.

And we can easily navigate the principle in the weird cases. What if the son asks for a poisonous serpent? No, that’s bad for you. What if the son asks for bread and the father is out of bread? Here’s a muffin instead.

It isn’t a law. It isn’t a secret way of getting everything you want. It’s a principle of how we are to interact with each other.

Then that is illustrated with God.

Example of God

Matthew 7:11 ESV

11 If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!

Asking in Life

Here we have a general principle. The “ask” works. It works. In most of life, in most things. In fact, the “ask” is so powerful some of us hesitate to ever ask because we don’t want to “put anyone out.”

I remember dating KK, ordering a steak medium rare, and getting this crispy piece of meat. I didn’t want to ask… because I didn’t want to bother them. KK convinced me, “don’t you want to give them a chance to make things right? Guaranteed the waiter wants to fix that.”

I asked, the waiter took one look, apologized, was back in 30 seconds with the most delicious medium rare steak… oh man. That’s a different meal.

The ask is powerful.

As a life principle, the one who asks very, very often gets what they ask for.

Especially in this context where the context is a desire to help, a desire to serve, a desire to give good things, ultimately a desire to love.

If you search, if you keep searching, you usually find. Except for Hayden. It’s been 10 years, I don’t think he’s okay.

When you knock, literally, on someone’s door… what usually happens? Especially if you knock persistently. The door opens. They may then tell you to go away… but this is true the vast majority of the time.

Asking and Giving in the Kingdom

This is even more true inside the Kingdom, because Jesus has given us an earlier picture of Kingdom righteousness. Again, not a law, that isn’t what Jesus is doing here. He is showing us what the Righteous life looks like in picture after picture.

And he paints the other side of this picture in Matthew 5:40-42.

Matthew 5:40–42 ESV

40 And if anyone would sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. 41 And if anyone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles. 42 Give to the one who begs from you, and do not refuse the one who would borrow from you.

That command is unreasonable as a “law”… but it isn’t a “law.” It is a picture of the righteous life. It is typical behavior,

Now, in the Kingdom, you have folks who are looking for opportunities to give wherever possible.

And you have folks who are asking to help, seeking to help, respectfully knocking on the door to help.

Those two meet each other? Giddy-up! It’s on! Striving to outdo one another in showing each other honor. (I read that somewhere).

The Profound Ask

Why is this profound? Why does Jesus even bring it up? This “asking” thing is profound, and it is no accident that he uses our relationship with God as an example.

It is God who creates and actively sustains the human “free” will. That isn’t a thing we just have intrinsically. Can God at any time abrogate, remove our free will by His action? Absolutely.

I can pick up a small child and they no longer get to choose which way they go. I choose for them. God can and does direct us at times, physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually...

But by and large, in a thousand ways every day, He invites us to choose. From the Garden to the 2nd Coming, He invites us to Choose Him. There is a hyper-Calvinism that would diminish God’s creative act here in the name of omniscience and omnipotence… but God has it all figured out. Just as a hyper-Arminianism would make our will Sovereign and God powerless.

We have a choice simply for this reason alone:

God asks. God seeks. God knocks.

From Genesis in the Garden, God gave humanity a choice. And then another choice. And then choices after that. Follow me… or choose not-me.

Jesus, to each disciple, follow me. It’s an ask. And they did or didn’t.

He is the shepherd seeking after the lost sheep.

He is knocking on the door:

Revelation 3:20 ESV

20 Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat with him, and he with me.

There he is. Now, he is speaking to a church here, but the principle remains. Here is Jesus, asking, seeking, knocking. He sets the standard.

This is how free-willed persons navigate the free-will of others. This is profound and foundational in how we are to honor what God has created in other persons. The moral foundation of freedom and democracy… it’s all borrowed from this Judeo-Christian truth:

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.

Anyone know that quote?

We have “unalienable” rights because God gave them to us, gives them to us. And we navigate that God given free will through the ask.

INSTEAD of manipulation, passive-aggression or aggression, coercion, condemnation, judgment, pushing, fixing, or any other thing.

Ask

There is freedom in the ask. There is honest curiousity. And the true test of the spirit in which we “ask” is what happens when someone says “no.”

When I “ask” the kids to take out the trash… am I really asking? I am using a polite form of command… and then I’ll make them do it. There are absolutely times and places where that is appropriate… but I don’t think that’s what Jesus is saying here.

That’s really clear in the summary in verse 12. “Do to others as you wish they would do.” When someone gives me an Ask-In-Name-Only I bristle. I feel belittled and bullied.

This is a “real” ask, a real choice. It is in the context of helping someone get a speck out of their eye, of offering heavenly treasure, of offering holy things, of an act of love.

Hey… can I help you? And, life principle, most times folks will let you. But if they don’t, that’s okay. Back off… and maybe you get the opportunity to ask again.

Seek

Seek and you shall find. There is effort there, there is intention, there is the searching. How does this work with people?

Jesus could search out the heart of folks, see where they were hurting, and then gently offer healing, or repentance, or whatever it is they truly needed. It takes most of us more effort to seek and search out the need, the hurt.

We have to be very gentle here, we can do damage in the searching, just like kids breaking the church playing hide and seek.

And that’s where “knocking” comes in.

Knock

Isn’t it crazy that “knocking” has been a thing for thousands of years? What is that? It is a gentle pressing on the barrier, on the boundary, asking permission, seeking to go in.

This is a pressing in. You could see that the door is closed and just back away. This is non-confrontation in me… and Jesus pushes against that too. He isn’t content with sitting in place waiting for everyone to come to him.

He asks. He seeks. He walks up to the closed door, and he makes his desire to enter in known. It is gently and respectfully pressing in for intimacy.

We can go to far here, for sure. Anyone felt a bit panicked when someone “knocked” on the door to your heart like the SWAT team busting down a door? AAAAH, back off, not ready, go away!

That isn’t love. Jesus doesn’t do it that way, neither should we. This isn’t intimacy on my terms when I demand it.

Again, the spirit is really measured in the “no.” What happens when we press in for a little more “real” and someone pushes back. “Nope, nobody home, go away!”

Okay. Maybe I get a chance to come back later. To persistently ask, seek, and knock.

So the picture we get is this:

Curious, intentional, persistent seekers respectfully testing the boundaries.

Curious, intentional, persistent seekers respectfully testing the boundaries.

Rest and Peace

If this isn’t a new “law”… how are we to hear Jesus’ commands here?

Jesus invites us into a new way of being, into a new way of relating with one another.

It is the gentle, steady way of Christ. It pursues love with those around us, it seeks and searches... but it doesn't press it push. It speaks curiosity, it invites in all kinds of ways. We are invited to be like Jesus.

We are invited to lay down striving and control, and to love as He loves... as He has first loved us. Especially with regard to those we condemn...

Those we look down on as “lesser.” Maybe the friend or relative we so desperately want to “fix.”

Who are you asking? “Hey… how are you?” “Hey, anything I can do to help you?”

Who are you seeking? Paying attention, seeking out their needs, their hurts.

And gently, carefully, respectfully, knocking on those boundaries. “You up for some real talk?”

I had one of these with my friend Ryan, not a believer, friends for years and years. Last time we talked on the phone, “Can I pray for you?” A VERY awkward and reluctant “yes.” But I prayed with him. And then we didn’t talk for a long time, and that’s okay.

I can ask again. I can seek again. I can knock again. I need to text that guy, right after church, hold me accountable.

But there’s no fear involved… because God has him. I don’t have to judge, condemn, fix or push. God has him, and loves him more than I do.

Jesus is asking, seeking, knocking. And as He gives me opportunity, I get to be a part of it.

Who’s on your heart? You might need to text someone. Right now, I’m not offended. If God is nudging you… Obedience is the greatest act of worship. You can text first, then sing it out, get the conversation started :D.

That isn’t a new law, it is a beautiful invitation. It is freedom in Christ. It is love for God and love for others… no wonder he is going to sum up verse 12 with “this is the Law and the Prophets.”

Disciples of Jesus, let’s listen to the words of the Master, and walk in the footsteps of the Master. This is discipleship.

Let us abandon judgment, condemnation, fixing and pushing.

Let us be Curious, intentional, persistent seekers respectfully testing the boundaries… seeking ways to love and serve those around us.

Loving as He has first loved us.