Detecting and Yielding Perceived Rights

Outline

Introduction

Whatever perceived rights you expect or demand come between you and your relationship with God. You may wrongly view some of your perceived rights as “needs.” They can become your idols because you seek them to be your security and satisfaction, rather than seeking complete dependency on God when your perceived rights are denied.

This is your line of service - to see that there is nothing between Jesus and Yourself. Oswald Chambers

Review studies 1-4. Write a short paragraph explaining what Christ expects you to do with your perceived rights and why.

I am to relinquish them to him because he knows what my needs are better than I. I need to trust him with what I really need.

You may realize intellectually that you have no rights in your relationship with Christ. However, you may continue to react sinfully to unpleasant situations and/or pursue self‐ gratification and happiness as though you still believed you have certain rights. It is recommended that you seek the help of a friend or a discipler in detecting the following warning signs of your unyielded rights.

Body

Warning Signs that You have Unyielded Perceived Rights

Warning signs are present when you still believe experientially that you have personal rights. Check the ones that are frequently manifested in your life.

Being angry, tense or irritable when my way is thwarted

Being self-pitying

Being depressed

Withdrawing from others when I do not get my way or when people do not please me

Repaying evil for evil

Having negative, critical, ungrateful attitudes

Suppressing and ignoring problems rather than dealing with them

Being judgmental and/or viewing others as inferior to me

Viewing myself as inferior to others

Comparing myself to others or to their accomplishments

Shifting blame to avoid personal responsibility

Not being willing to suffer emotional pain, inconvenience, and/or having my plans thwarted

Unwilling to give up sinful dependencies on spouse, parents, children and/or friends

Trying to control and/or manipulate people or circumstances

Unwilling to go to uncomfortable places God may want me to go

Being irresponsible and/or uncommitted in relationship to others

Disobeying human authority

Being lazy; procrastinating

Unwilling to get involved with or to witness to unsaved people

Seeking personal pleasure, happiness and/or self-gratification (setting goals to find personal pleasure rather than giving of myself to God and others)

Thinking I don’t “deserve” to have painful trials or difficult people in my life

Fearing failure, the future, rejection and/or consequences of sin

Unwilling to trust God to take care of me in my areas of difficulty

Not persevering in obeying God because I think God’s way won’t yield the results I want; losing hope in God; giving up

Expecting that God “owes” me something because of my obedience

Pleasing others rather than taking difficult stands to obey God

Hiding my sin in order to appear to be a strong Christian

Believing God should work in my time rather than in His time (impatience)

Trying to convince others of my rightness rather than merely presenting my viewpoint in a loving way, releasing the outcome to God

Being jealous, covetous, envious

Not accepting and loving difficult people unconditionally

Being self focused, self-centered and self absorbed

Unwilling to have others intrude upon or interrupt my schedule and/or my “private time” (may include family members, friends or those in need)

Placing too great an importance on material possessions, money or saving for the future

Placing too great an importance on power, success or achievement

Unwilling to give generously of my financial resources to God

Unwilling to acknowledge God as the rightful owner of my body, my family, my possessions, my money, my future

Unwilling to repeatedly give thanks for my difficult situations

Refusing to practice renewing my mind when I am controlled by sinful thoughts

Unwilling to forgive those who offend me

Unwilling to remove anything that is a barrier between me and full obedience to God

Excusing complacency and/or lack of spiritual growth in my life without repentance

Unwilling to accept and to submit to God’s plan for my life

Being prideful in not wanting to accept scriptural help or admonishment from those whom the Lord wants to use for growth in my life

Unwilling to regularly seek forgiveness of God

Unwilling to regularly seek forgiveness of those I sin against

Unwilling to give up “pet” sins because I enjoy them

Unwilling to give up lusting, pornography, masturbation and/or other sexual sin

Unwilling to face, to acknowledge and to repent of my own sin toward God and others

Being angry and self-pitying when I am not respected and/or my reputation is maligned

Unwilling to be hospitable on a regular basis

Not having biblical priorities (God, spouse, children, outreach to others, job)

Unwilling to be vulnerable and accountable to others

Refusing to minister to others

Unwilling to be alone (to live alone, go without a boyfriend/girlfriend, give up friends that lead me astray and/or ungodly activities)

Unwilling to accept my singleness

Unwilling to accept physical problems

Unwilling to pray and/or to read the Bible regularly

Unwilling to accept the probability of my death because of a terminal illness or the death or illness of a loved one

Unwilling to risk my life for the cause of Christ

Rejecting others before they reject me

Retreating into fantasy to avoid emotional pain and/or expecting the ideal in situations or people

Being a perfectionist; being performance-oriented

Seeking to “feel good” about myself through trying to build or to maintain my self‐ esteem

Continuing to focus on my sin after I have confessed it to God and after I have sought forgiveness of those I offended

Indulging in excessive behavior to escape/avoid what God really wants me to do with my time (examples: too much TV, computer time, sleeping, eating, shopping, exercising, working, ministering, etc.)

Unwilling to be “broken” by God; to “die to self,” to daily surrender to God’s control over my life

Believing I should live a long life

Unwilling to experience sinful emotions so I can deal with them biblically

Pursuing my unbiblical goals

Being angry, self-pitying over being married and/or my spouse

Unwilling to reach out and be lovingly involved with people who are unlovable and/ or who are facing difficult situations

Being angry, self-pitying when I do not receive affirmation, love, approval and/or attention I desire from others

Believing God does not love me because He doesn’t give me what I expect or want

Believing I can question God repeatedly about why He allows trials in my life; believing I deserve an answer from Him

As inhabitants of this earth, without being aware of it, we claim certain rights and take certain things for granted. We have an illusion of being in control of our world. It is only when that control is snatched from us that we realize that the situations we take for granted and the things we claim as rightS are in fact, only rights we perceive we have.

In His wisdom and love, the Lord often intervenes to remove your perceived rights so that you will realize your need to depend more fully upon Him and His Word to be the source of your security, strength, comfort and contentment rather than your environment. God never guarantees that your earthly existence in this sinful, fallen world will be free from trouble. Your guarantee of security is to be found in your relationship with Christ, who provides all you need to deal biblically with the loss of your rights and the loss of control over your world. (2 Pet. 1:3) Find peace and fulfillment by abiding in Christ, who is The Blessed Controller of your imperfect world.

John 16:33 ESV

33 I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”

‘If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself.’ The surrender here is of myself to Jesus, myself with His rest at the heart of it. ‘If you would be my disciple, give up your right to yourself.’ Oswald Chambers

Perceived Rights

In Study 5 you checked the sinful behaviors and attitudes which indicate that you have notrelinquishedcertainperceivedrightstoChrist. Nowlookateachnumberyouchecked in Study 5 and check the corresponding number in Study 6. The corresponding number indicates the right you must surrender.

Some of the numbers list more than one right as possibilities that may or may not be applicable to your situation. After you check the appropriate line, circle or highlight the right(s), which apply to you.

Right to have things go my way

Right to feel sorry for myself because things are not going my way

Right to be depressed because circumstances or people in my life are not what I want them to be

Flight to withdraw when I am not pleased with others to punish them and/or to protect myself from further hurt

Right to repay evil for evil; to retaliate

Right to focus on the “negatives” in others’ lives or in my circumstances

Right to not acknowledge and/or to not biblically handle problems

Right to feel superior to others and to judge their actions or attitudes; right to not allow those I view as inferior to teach me

Right to focus on my inadequacies and low self-esteem

Right to compare myself to others and thus, feel superior or inferior to them

Right to not admit I’m wrong (when l am) and to blame others for my sin and my sinful responses

Right to avoid being inconvenienced and/or experiencing emotional pain and suffering

Right to place my primary security and dependency in a person rather than God

Right to have people doing, thinking or being what I want them to do, think or be; right to control my circumstances

Right to not have to go places I don’t want to go in obedience to God .

Right to not have to do what I should do in relationship to others; right to break promises; to pursue my own ends at the expense of someone else

Right to not have to obey my human authorities (government, elders, teachers, parents, husband, employer)

Right to not do things when they should be done; right to put my personal pleasure first

Right to not have to be rejected when sharing the Gospel; right to not be uncomfortable or inconvenienced by witnessing

Right to seek the goals that will bring pleasure rather than seeking God’s goals

Right to have painful trials and difficult people changed or removed because I believe I don’t “deserve” them

Right not to fail; right to not be rejected; right to try to control my future; right to not have to reap what I have sown

Right to try to take care of the difficulty myself without yielding control of the situation to God

Right to put time limits on God and then decide, “I’ve had enough;” right to not persevere; right to lose hope in God

Right to expect things to go my way because I have obeyed God

Right to have people love and accept me; right to not give needed admonishment; right to not risk rejection in obedience to God

Right to hide in my sin in order to appear to be a strong Christian

Right to be impatient or demanding when God expects me to wait for an answer or change

Right to convince others I am right; right to be understood; right to have people agree with me

Right to have material possessions, appearance, marriage, family, spiritual walk, less difficult life, etc. that others have

Right to not love others because they don’t do what I want them to do

Right to focus on myself and not on God and others

Right to not be inconvenienced by family members, friends or those who are in need; right to complete all I want to do in the time I want to do it

Right to have possessions I desire, a savings account, spending money, a retirement plan, benefits, etc.

Right to be in control of others and/or to have position or power I want

Right to rob God and do what I want to do with “my” money and resources

Right to not have physical pain, disease, impairments, etc.; right to have the physical appearance I want; right not to experience the loss of loved ones, possessions, money; right to control my future

Right to grumble, complain and feel sorry for myself; right to cling to those sinful attitudes rather than obeying God by giving thanks and accepting His sovereign control

Right to wallow in sinful thoughts; right to not discipline my mind to godliness

Right to bitterness and malice; right to suppress rather than releasing the offender through forgiveness; right to be prideful saying, “I will not forgive.”

Right to hang on to my idols, my indulgences, escapes, wrong priorities

Right to be a complacent and/or an uninvolved Christian; right to not grow spiritually or change sinful patterns or attitudes

Right to design my own plans and expect God to carry them out; right to rebel against God’s plan with sinful actions or attitudes

Right to not be accountable to any person for spiritual growth; right to not heed godly counsel

Right to not humble myself by seeking God’s forgiveness when I sin

Right to not humble myself to seek forgiveness of those I sin against; right to pretend everything is okay after I offend someone

Right to hold on to “pet” sins because they bring pleasure

Right to fleshly indulgences in my mind and/or body

Right to deceive myself about my sin through rationalizing, ignoring, shifting blame, denying; right to not obey God

Right to respect; right to a good reputation; right to defend my reputation

Right to not use my home for ministry; right to not be inconvenienced; right to have priorities in my order rather than God’s order

Right to spend time on what I believe is important rather than what God views as important

Right to superficial relationships in which no one will call me to accountability or question what I do or think

Right to not reach out to others; right to not meet the needs of others; right to ignore those who are hurting around me

Right to not be alone; right to a boyfriend or girlfriend; right to friends who are a bad influence on me; right to activities that are ungodly rather than being alone

Right to a marriage

Right to be free of physical pain, disease, impairments

Right to ignore Bible reading and prayer; right to not be inconvenienced or to not give up other pursuits rather than giving God time

Right to my life; right to the lives of my loved ones

Right to not risk my life in a stand for Christ and/or on the mission field

Right to avoid or emotionally eliminate someone from my life who might hurt me

Right to avoid emotional pain, to deny reality by retreating into fantasy; right to expect the ideal in situations or people

Right to have the unbiblical goal of being perfect and/or expecting others to please me; right to “perform” to please God, others, myself

Flight to “feel good” about myself; right to be self-focusing; right to the goal of building self-esteem

Right to “feel guilty,” to minimize Christ’s finished work and to refuse to accept God’s forgiveness

Right to not turn to God for satisfaction and to indulge in excessive behavioral escapes instead

Right to not be humbled; to not “die to self,” to not fully surrender to God’s control over my life

Right to a long life

Right to not experience sinful emotions and confess them to God

Right to foster and pursue self-life goals rather than adopting God’s goals

Right to not accept God’s sovereign plan of my marriage and/or spouse

Right to not be involved with people who influence me to feel uncomfortable

Right to receive affirmation, love, approval and/or attention from others

Right to believe God doesn’t love me because He didn’t do what I wanted Him to do

Right to expect that God tell me why I’m going through trial(s)

Steps to Relinguishing Perceived Rights

Praying with a witness, give each right which you have previously claimed, to God. You should say one of the following:

“I give up the right to

“I surrender the right to

“I renounce the right to

“I relinquish the right to

Ask God to forgive you for claiming these rights and for your sinful responses when your perceived rights were violated. (1 John 1:9)

Practice an attitude of thanksgiving and acceptance of God’s will.

In the future, handle the violation of your perceived rights in the following ways:

Realize that when you are upset, angry and/or self-pitying about a person or circumstance in your life, you are probably unconsciously claiming perceived rights.

Practice repeatedly saying, “I do not have a right to (be specific). I accept your will, Lord, in this matter.”

Thank God on a repeated basis for not allowing you to have rights because whatever deprivations you are experiencing are for your benefit. (Rom. 8:28)

Accept that this is one way of suffering for Christ’s sake. (Phil. 1:29; 1 Pet. 2:21)

Remember God’s sovereign plan includes the violation of your perceived rights. He will test you often to strengthen your relationship with Him and to build your character.

Meditate on how Christ gave up all His rights when He had just claim to them. Remember that He gave them up for your sake!

Keep your list of relinquished rights in a convenient location as a reminder to you. Add to the list as God reveals to you new areas in which you are manifesting sinful responses to what you perceive to be your rights.

Conclusion

Application