Servants and Masters (How to not be a people pleaser)

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Colossians 3:22–4:1 ESV
22 Bondservants, obey in everything those who are your earthly masters, not by way of eye-service, as people-pleasers, but with sincerity of heart, fearing the Lord. 23 Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, 24 knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ. 25 For the wrongdoer will be paid back for the wrong he has done, and there is no partiality. 1 Masters, treat your bondservants justly and fairly, knowing that you also have a Master in heaven.
Context -
Bondservants - Teens / Work
Maturity in Christ
- Launching children
“The customer is always right.”
How do you respond to human authority while still being under the authority of Christ?
Take captive
Let no pass judgment on you
Illustration from Bob Jones Curriculum
Jenny
4. Mrs. Willis asked the girls in her
Sunday school class each to invite one
friend to visit next Sunday. Alyssa
wrote a note to Natalie asking her to
visit. Jenny wrote notes to four friends.
On Saturday evening, she called each
one to remind her to come.

Don’t be people pleasers

Continuum
Their opinion of what you did matters more than what you think of yourself. You have no idea who you are if they don’t like you.
Their opinion of you is tied in your mind to their opinion of your performance. It ruins your day if they don’t like what you did.
You have no limits on what you would do if you knew it would make them happy.
You’ll bend over backward to try and please someone. You resent it when they don’t like it.
Pleasing self - You don’t care what they think of you as long as you get what you want. You don’t even consider how you came across.
Their opinion of you is tied in your mind to what you think of yourself. It ruins your day if they get in your way.
You have lots of limits on what you would do to make someone else happy.
When you do the minimum, you resent them requesting more.
What does it matter?
Passive - aggressive
Blameshift
Attack and slander rather than seek to bless
But we’re still trying to be under God’s authority and please Him

Seek to respect God in everything you do

Sincerity
Respect for God
Working “from soul”
“Do more” - But Colossians 2 argues against that
“Do your best” - Best can be heard perfectively or it can be heard from effort or it can be heard with soul
“Do with excellence”
Parable of the talents
Matthew 25:14–30 ESV
14 “For it will be like a man going on a journey, who called his servants and entrusted to them his property. 15 To one he gave five talents, to another two, to another one, to each according to his ability. Then he went away. 16 He who had received the five talents went at once and traded with them, and he made five talents more. 17 So also he who had the two talents made two talents more. 18 But he who had received the one talent went and dug in the ground and hid his master’s money. 19 Now after a long time the master of those servants came and settled accounts with them. 20 And he who had received the five talents came forward, bringing five talents more, saying, ‘Master, you delivered to me five talents; here, I have made five talents more.’ 21 His master said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant. You have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much. Enter into the joy of your master.’ 22 And he also who had the two talents came forward, saying, ‘Master, you delivered to me two talents; here, I have made two talents more.’ 23 His master said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant. You have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much. Enter into the joy of your master.’ 24 He also who had received the one talent came forward, saying, ‘Master, I knew you to be a hard man, reaping where you did not sow, and gathering where you scattered no seed, 25 so I was afraid, and I went and hid your talent in the ground. Here, you have what is yours.’ 26 But his master answered him, ‘You wicked and slothful servant! You knew that I reap where I have not sown and gather where I scattered no seed? 27 Then you ought to have invested my money with the bankers, and at my coming I should have received what was my own with interest. 28 So take the talent from him and give it to him who has the ten talents. 29 For to everyone who has will more be given, and he will have an abundance. But from the one who has not, even what he has will be taken away. 30 And cast the worthless servant into the outer darkness. In that place there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.’
Do your best illustration story - Pale calf
Pleasing parents - pleasing God. Hearing praise/ Giving praise
Amy at school
Jaidev at soccer

Be motivated by your inheritance

Not people’s praise or fearing their slander
“The inheritance”
Colossians 3:4 ESV
4 When Christ who is your life appears, then you also will appear with him in glory.
Colossians 1:21–22 ESV
21 And you, who once were alienated and hostile in mind, doing evil deeds, 22 he has now reconciled in his body of flesh by his death, in order to present you holy and blameless and above reproach before him,
Colossians 1:12–14 ESV
12 giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in light. 13 He has delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred us to the kingdom of his beloved Son, 14 in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.
Anything I do now ultimately prepares me for ruling and reigning with Christ.
As a slave, as a teen, at work
Even if I mess up in what I’ve been given, Christ’s redemption brings hope. I’m ruled by a different ruler than perfection or success or people’s praise.
People pleasing or fearing God according to the Word of God is all about which reward you’re looking toward.
Remember God is Lord and judge
Submission is not being externally controlled. It’s acknowledging the rank I have and delighting in how I can participate in what God is doing. Maturity for us and the children we launch is making sure they know they live in God’s world and delighting in the good we can do to honor Him. It’s growing in compassion, kindness, patience and humility because of the King you serve.
It’s not simply growing in my ability to handle my own life and make my own decisions without dying.
Whose hands are you in?
Back to Bob Jones illustration
Community Group illustration
When have you felt controlled by requests that seemed spiritual but didn’t take into account who you were/are?
What delight do you find in serving God respectfully? What about God makes you want to respect Him?
Look again at Col 3:1-4, Col 1:21-22, Colossians 1:10-14. What insights into your inheritance do you see? Why would this motivate you to pleasing God and not people?
Some people scoff at using rewards as motivation for good behavior. What’s helpful about this? What’s unbiblical about it?
How did your parents communicate they were pleased with you? What does a reward communicate about the fact that we pleased God?
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