Daddy Issues Week 1 | Fear of Rejection
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Today we are starting a new series called Daddy Issues.
Some of you are TRIGGERED ALREADY!
We’re not getting too deep into the weeds of our trauma
We are going to spend the next 3 weeks talking about some root issues in our lives,
My goal is that some of us, will experience a time of healing, because no matter how great your earthly dad was, we all have issues that we are dealing with simply because we were raised by imperfect humans. That’s why we all have daddy issues.
And the best way to deal with these issues, is to examine the relationship that Jesus had with God the father.
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Jesus Relationship with His Father
Jesus Relationship with His Father
During Jesus’ 3 years of earthly ministry, we have two moments where we hear God the father verbally speak from heaven to Jesus.
only two mentions of this in the Bible, regarding what God the father speaks to Jesus his son,
This means this is very important.
Both of these moments He says the exact same thing:
The first is the very start of Jesus’ ministry. He is getting baptized and the Bible tells us:
10 And immediately, coming up from the water, He saw the heavens parting and the Spirit descending upon Him like a dove. 11 Then a voice came from heaven, “You are My beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased.”
Notice the chronological structure of this statement.
he is His son, in whom he loves, and is well pleased BEFORE he does anything for him.
We have all made this way too much about works.
It is not our works that garner our standing as accepted and blessed but rather our belief.
We will talk about this a little more as we progress
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Mount of Transfiguration
The 2nd moment is later in Jesus’ ministry.
One of the major milestones of Jesus life called the Transfiguration.
Jesus is shown to be perfect,
God in the flesh to his closest disciples.
During that moment, God the father speaks again:
5 While he was still speaking, behold, a bright cloud overshadowed them; and suddenly a voice came out of the cloud, saying, “This is My beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased. Hear Him!”
This is after Jesus has gained notoriety and has performed a plethora of miracles.
But the statement of the father is the same before the ministry begins as it is when the ministry is almost complete.
It didn’t matter if Jesus was unknown or well known, his father said the same thing over him and it’s the same thing we all need from our fathers:
“You are my Son”- acceptance
“Whom I love”- affection
“I am well pleased”- affirmation
It is within those three ideas that we will spend the three weeks of this series.
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These three concepts are essential to our development of identity and purpose…we all need them.
According to Inc Magazine Everyone has 3 fundamental needs, according to science:
to feel safe, to feel like we belong, and to feel like we matter.”
You need this
Your spouse needs this
Your kids need this
Your company needs this
This series is going to help you experience what every human truly craves, but it is only found partially in man, but perfectly in God.
Our greatest needs are fulfilled partially in those we see but perfectly in the one we serve.
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So we all have daddy issues where our dads didn’t add up in one of these three areas. And we are going to talk about them, not because they are going to be fixed by your earthly father, but we can find find healing and wholeness in your heavenly father.
Lets address a daddy issue we all have..
Week 1- The Remedy of Rejection
This is so huge, because how many know, there is nothing worse than the feeling of rejection.
We have all experienced it
turned down for a job
passed over for a promotion
broken up with,
cheated on
Or there was a relationship that never turned romantic because the other person just didn’t have those feelings for you. Kept you in the FRIEND ZONE. Nothing worse than the friend zone.
STORY OF ARAUNAH AT OZARK YOUTH CAMP
No matter how strong you think you are…REJECTION STILL HURTS
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Rejection is very painful.
I can stand here and be honest with you that I have been rejected a bunch.
Before we planted the church we sent numerous resumes to churches.
Had interviews
Got down to the final three on a church in Louisiana that honestly, I really wanted.
THEY WENT IN ANOTHER DIRECTION.
Church planting is a plethora of rejection opportunities.
Every time someone leaves…and my how many people leave LOL It feels like rejection
We had some of our best friends tell us early on that they were going to be jumping off of the launch team because they wanted us to be their friends not their pastors. (REJECTION)
It hurts!
“The greatest disease in the West today is not TB or leprosy; it is being unwanted, unloved, and uncared for.” – Mother Teresa
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And we have all felt that. This phenomenon makes it easy to make a fatal mistake…
We can begin letting peoples rejection of us begin to paralyze our future.
We often allow their rejection to become our resume.
They said no last time, so I won’t try again,
I won’t trust again
Some of us won’t
apply for the job…
pursue the relationship
even jump onto a serve team
We won’t reach our potential because we just stopped trying.
What dreams have you stopped pursuing?
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Often the most paralyzing part of rejection is the belief that we are the only ones dating with it…
But rejection is a universal part of life:
There will be doors that do not open for us.
There will be people who won’t like you.
There will be a team or a band that you wont make.
Someone isnt going to show up to your party, or worse, someone isnt going to show up to your kids birthday party. (NAMELY ME)
Someone is going to leave your small group.
They might even like their mothers cooking over yours.
You are going to be rejected. but when you are rejected…you aren’t the first…in fact you are in good company because because Jesus also was rejected.
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20 Remember the word that I said to you, ‘A servant is not greater than his master.’ If they persecuted Me, they will also persecute you. If they kept My word, they will keep yours also.
Jesus was perfect.
And yet the crowds rejected him,
the religious community mocked him,
his family didn’t believe in him,
2 of his close friends turned their back on him when he needed them most.
If you feel like you deal with a lot of rejection, you are in the same boat as Jesus.
So HOW, how did Jesus overcome rejection? He offers us the remedy
I believe it is found in that passage below. That the two times he heard his father speaking to him, his father said the same thing.
11 Then a voice came from heaven, “You are My beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased.”
Jesus knew the trick to overcoming man’s rejection and I want to give it to you here:
We overcome man’s rejection by embracing God’s acceptance .
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When you know what God thinks about you, it always trumps what people think about you.
So if people have left you, guess what?
That is ok when you understand that God will never leave you nor ever forsake you.
You need to know you are accepted by God.
If he believes in me, I don’t really care what anyone else says.
So how do we overcome rejection. Let me show you it one more time:
We overcome man’s rejection by embracing God’s acceptance .
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So I want to spend the rest of this sermon not focusing on your rejection,
Let me talk to you how you walk in victory by embracing God’s acceptance found in Jesus.
And if you are here today and don’t have a relationship with Jesus, well you are going to hear some of the best parts of it, and at the end I am going to give you an opportunity to surrender your life to Christ, and I promise you, everything will be different once you do that.
It all starts with this..
My acceptance by God came at a price
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Let me let you in on a secret, and this isnt popular but you need to know it. You are not automatically accepted by God.
Just because you are his creation, and just because you have purpose, doenst mean that you and God our buddies.
In fact, it’s an error to say “we’re all the children of God.”
12 But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, to those who believe in His name:
You arent born into acceptance.
The way we are born is actually fallen, broken.
That is why the “I was just born this way” isn't really an excuse; everyone is born fallen and separated.
If you don’t believe me, go hang out with a 2 year old.
I was a clepto as a child…right environment doesn’t atone for wrong intention.
I stole from the Christian book store.
Nobody taught me that…it was simply a natural occurence because I was born into sin.
21 And you, who once were alienated and enemies in your mind by wicked works, yet now He has reconciled 22 in the body of His flesh through death, to present you holy, and blameless, and above reproach in His sight—
Don’t let anyone sell you that “god accepts me just the way I am” business.
Our natural position isnt accepted, its alienated.
Separated because of sin..
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So what happens?
We arent accepted automatically, we are accepted at a price.
It cost us something. Our acceptance is costly.
The price was high…it was so high in fact, that we could not pay it…BUT GOD DID!
The price God paid for our acceptance was the sacrifice of Jesus.
Don’t ever say you arent worthy.
God didn’t die for some trash.
What he did on the cross made you worthy.
He thought you were worth it.
Stop calling trash what God has called treasure.
You are worth the sacrifice.
The price that Jesus paid was significant and ultimately the most important.
But that isn’t the only price that is paid
because if it were…everyone would be in heaven
unfortunately, not everyone puts their faith in the sacrifice that Jesus paid on the cross for their sin and their acceptance from God.
There is something we need to do. A price we pay, and I just want you to know ahead of time.
The price we pay for our acceptance is the surrender of our will.
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There can only be one God in your life.
There is a cross and a throne in every life.
We step on the cross and place Jesus on the throne through the act of repentance. Meaning turning from our way, and turning towards God.
9 The Lord is not slack concerning His promise, as some count slackness, but is longsuffering toward us, not willing that any should perish but that all should come to repentance.
What we give up is so insignificant in comparison to what we gain following Jesus.
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My acceptance by God came with perks
Oh there is nothing like having some loyalty perks. You follow Jesus, you give him your life, you get some perks that I just need to remind some of you guys about.
Because if we arent careful, you will make this about works, and not about perks.
I go to starbucks often just because they have made it accessible for me to enjoy a free drink.
It’s the perk of being on the team.
And let me remind you. As followers of Jesus, we are accepted by God and that acceptance comes with some major perks.
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Perks of being accepted by God:
Forgiveness
Can I remind you that you are forgiven?
What Jesus did on the cross forgives us of our sins.
I don’t walk around with shame, because I am not my mistakes.
I am not seen through the lens of what I have done but I am seen through the lens of what Jesus did for me.
I am a son of God. Completely forgiven.
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Let me just say it this way, I cant be more forgiven than I am right now.
So stop punishing yourself.
Christians do the weirdest stuff on this.
Hockey illustration. We put ourselves in a penalty box.
Ok I cant pray. I cant go to church. I definitely cant serve right now. Im punishing myself.
Where does this come from?
You cant be more forgiven than you are right now. No more saved than you are today.
1 There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, who do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit.
Im not going to beat myself up. Jesus was beaten for me.
Hebrews 10:35
So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded.
I am forgiven, and I will remember that.
Freedom
Freedom is a perk of being accepted by God.
The cross was about more than forgiveness…it was about freedom…meaning I DON’T KEEP LIVING THE SAME WAY!
John 8:36 So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed
Im free in Christ, and guess what I am getting more free every day.
Im constantly being moved from where I am to where God wants me to be.
Don’t settle with yesterdays freedom, God is just getting started. Im his project, he is making me more and more like Jesus.
Let me give you one more perk.
Family
God’s plan is that you not only get forgiveness and freedom, but you get a family. This is HUGE. Scripture tells us that:
Psalm 68:6 God sets the lonely in families
This is the church. We are a group of people who have been accepted by God, we have this in common. We didn’t before, but we do now.
1 Peter 2:10 Once you were not a people, but now you are the people of God; once you had not received mercy, but now you have received mercy
We overcome man’s rejection by embracing God’s acceptance .
The family of God is reaching the hurting, the widows, taking care of orphans, freeing people out of sex trafficking, giving people the hope of the gospel.
We care for each other Love each other Believe in each other Pray for each other Speak life to each other Challenge each other Cry with each other Laugh with each other
We don’t quit on each other,
Don’t judge each other
We don’t gossip about each other
We don’t bash each other online
Don’t assume the worst in each other
We are the family of God. And I am proud to be part of it.
See how little your rejection affects you when you compare it to the acceptance God has shown you.
It came with a price, it came with some perks. And lastly.
My acceptance by God came with purpose
You have been created on purpose and for a purpose.
You are weird on purpose.
God accepted you, brought you in, and he has a motive, a plan, its simply this:
Romans 15:7 Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God.
We should love people so radically, that they will want to say yes to the acceptance that Jesus offers them.
I wonder how many people see our lives and say, if that is what it means to be a christian, im out.
If that is what it means to follow Jesus, I will do my own thing.
You might be the only Bible people will ever read
You might be the only picture of Christ people ever look at
You might be the only answer to prayer that people are praying, and if we arent careful we will miss our shot.
People are not the problem; people are the purpose.
Let me say it loud and clear. This is not the season to divide, to unfriend, to get offended.
This is the season to point people to Jesus.
Who you vote for is a lot less important
What you post on your Instagram is a lot less important
If you protest or don’t protest, is a lot less important
What is more important is have you been accepted by God by accepting the work that Jesus paid for on the cross.
I didn’t get accepted to boast, I got accepted to BRING.
