140-116 Faithful Fathers

Selected Scriptures

The Perils of Parenting (Source Unknown)

What in the world is happening with our kids today? Let's see ... I think it started when Madalyn Murray O'Hair complained that she didn't want any prayer in our schools, and we said OK. Then someone said you'd better not read the Bible in school. And we said, OK. Remember Dr. Benjamin Spock, who said we shouldn't spank our children when they misbehave, because their little personalities would be warped and we might damage their self-esteem? And we said, OK, we wouldn't spank them. Then someone said that teachers and principals had better not discipline our children when they misbehave. And school administrators agreed, insisting that no one in their school could touch a child or else we'd all be sued. Then someone insisted we provide abortions to our daughters without parents' knowledge. And we said OK. Then someone else said, let's give our sons all the condoms they want without telling parents. And we thought it was another great idea. Then Hollywood decided to establish a new set of standards for our young people, taking our nation's morals to sodomic levels. Everyone said, "Well, I guess it's all right as long as we put letters on the advertisements, like PG, PG-13, and R. And in the process, everyone decided to ignore the old rule about reaping what you sow. And now we're wondering why it's so hard to raise kids.

Every Xn is in a spiritual battle and not surprisingly, the enemy is waging a full frontal assault against the family—that blessed institution designed by God for the good of creation. The attacks continue to be progressive and we’re left to wonder what will become of the family, culture, society, our nation—even the world? It doesn’t seem promising unless we recognize that the victory belongs to the Lord. So how can we find stability for the family today? The answer is in part—faithful fathers.

If the family is to find stability, fathers must understand their role in the home, to the family and undertake the critical responsibility dictated in God’s Word. Families need faithful fathers, our church needs…our society needs…the world needs…faithful fathers.

In the Bible, we are hard pressed to find good, godly, faithful fathers who are exemplary for us (few but not many).

Adam—nothing is revealed about Adam’s relationship with his children. We could infer that he spoke of his relationship with God before he sinned and the consequences of his disobedience. He likely gave them instruction regarding sacrifices (Cain killed Abel over that). Beyond this, there is nothing else said.

Enoch—walked with God and his children likely witnessed a righteous man who was taken from earth.

Noah—not until Noah do you have the description of a man being “righteous.” Here you have a bit of an idea of the relationship between a father and his sons. Though we speculate a bit: they most likely assisted in the construction of the ark. They no doubt had questions about why they were doing this. His example after the flood was tainted however when he became intoxicated after they left the ark.

Abraham—He didn’t fare much better than Noah. His 1st son was born to a woman who was not his wife. b/c of his wife, that mother and child had to leave the influence of Abraham being cast out into the wilderness.

Aaron—Aaron led the nation in the 1st act of idolatry following the Exodus and the only reason he lived was b/c Moses prayed to God to spare his life. 2 sons (Nadab and Abihu) offered strange fire to the Lord and b/c of their irreverence they were immediately struck dead. From that day—I think Aaron got the message about raising his other sons.

Eli—priest of Israel during the days of Samuel’s upbringing had worthless sons who lived impure and immoral lives. But Eli gave them Egyptian names—blurring the cultures.

Samuel—His sons grew up and took on leadership within Israel but they were wicked.

Saul—He was so angry at his son Jonathan that he threw his spear at him tried to murder him.

David—had at least 8 wives who gave him 19 sons, 1 daughter. That doesn’t account for all the children of unnamed concubines. God called David “man after my own heart”—yet the example he set for his children wasn’t necessarily good.

Solomon—when given the opportunity to have anything—he asked God for wisdom which God granted. The wisest man on earth had 700 wives and 300 concubines. He had unnumbered children. Solomon realized at the end of his life that a life lived for the pursuit of pleasure was worthless and so he left 3000 proverbs most to his son to instruct him in the ways of the Lord.

Job--in all the OT, Job is perhaps the one who didn’t have glaring faults in his parenting. Job was a righteous man and concerned about his 10 children and their relationship with the Lord. He would even sacrifice on behalf of his children in case they had cursed God in the midst of their parties. He did this continually. His daughters were more beautiful than any other women in the land—describing inner righteousness.

If we survey the NT—you don’t see too many fathers at all. There may be a passing mention but really no descriptions of a father’s relationship with his children.

Zecharias and Joseph—both appeared to be humble, righteous. Both visited by angels and they worshipped God at the announcements of the births of their sons.

12 disciples—some of the disciples were likely married but the Bible is silent on whether any of them had children.

Jesus—of course Jesus we neither married nor fathered any children

Though good examples are rare, God did not remain silent when it comes to the picture of a faithful father. I want to show you 3 features of faithful fathers today.

1. Faithful Fathers Assume Their Duties

Spheres of duties:

A. Your Duty Toward Your Creator

Genesis 1:27 NASB95

27 God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.

For what purpose did God create man and woman?

Colossians 1:16 NASB95

16 For by Him all things were created, both in the heavens and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities—all things have been created through Him and for Him.

You were created by God for His good pleasure and for you to glorify Him. The life you live ought to reflect that purpose.

1 Peter 4:11 NASB95

11 Whoever speaks, is to do so as one who is speaking the utterances of God; whoever serves is to do so as one who is serving by the strength which God supplies; so that in all things God may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom belongs the glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen.

Psalm 119:1–2 NASB95

1 How blessed are those whose way is blameless, Who walk in the law of the Lord. 2 How blessed are those who observe His testimonies, Who seek Him with all their heart.

Worship God by forsaking the idols of the heart (security, material things, knowledge, control, wealth, good health, other gods, other people, pleasure, comfort, good opinion of others, physical appearance)—these things will hinder your relationship with God. Worship God alone—that is your duty to the creator.

B. Your Duty Toward Your Companion

1st priority is duty toward God; 2nd—toward your companion-wife. What is your duty?

Love

Ephesians 5:25 NASB95

25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her,

This is unselfish, sacrificial love—modeling Christ’s love toward your wife.

Leadership

Ephesians 5:23–24 NASB95

23 For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. 24 But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything.

The home is designed by God in such a way that the husband has leadership over the home—including the wife. Now that authority is limited to that which God has entrusted to you. By fulfilling this duty you ultimately bring glory to God. Now what does that leadership look like?

Dr. Stuart Scott (The Exemplary Husband)

To help others see how God leads his people

To develop humility and obedience in all those concerned

To guide the family in righteousness

To give a sense of order and stability in the home

To provide what is needed for the family

To protect the family

To accomplish ministry for God more effectively

To help the family be a good witness to the world

C. Your Duty Toward Your Children

The responsibility for training children falls mostly on fathers (in Bible).

Deuteronomy 6:7 NASB95

7 “You shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up.

Deuteronomy 11:19 NASB95

19 “You shall teach them to your sons, talking of them when you sit in your house and when you walk along the road and when you lie down and when you rise up.

Ephesians 6:4 NASB95

4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Fathers are primarily responsible for training and raising the children, brining them up in the instruction of the Lord. Of course moms play a crucial role in this area also but fathers will be held accountable by God. The home should be a place of biblical instruction, modeling christ-likeness, interaction and intimacy with children.

Melvin Worthington "The father is a verbal teacher. That is, he instructs or speaks the truth to his children as he gives the precepts and principles of God's Word to them. The father is a visual teacher. What he teaches verbally he puts into practice. By his daily life, he becomes a model and pattern for his children to imitate. The father is a vital teacher. Faithful fathers teach their children with consistency and competency. His effective teaching must be coupled with compassion for the children and a comprehension of the children's needs. Fathers will give an account to God for the training and teaching of their children."

2. Faithful Fathers Avoid Hidden Dangers

You wouldn't knowingly place yourself or your family in danger's way but many of the things that fathers do put them and their families at risk spiritually/morally.

A. Selfishness

Quite often fathers push their children into vocations or lifestyles which please them rather than freeing the child to do God's will. What does Eph 6:4 tell us "Father's make sure your sons can throw the perfect spiral, or the fastest curve ball, have the best GPA?" Bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. As parents we love to see our children excel but we shouldn’t drive them b/c of selfishness or pride.

B. Slothfulness

1 Samuel 3:11–14 NASB95

11 The Lord said to Samuel, “Behold, I am about to do a thing in Israel at which both ears of everyone who hears it will tingle. 12 “In that day I will carry out against Eli all that I have spoken concerning his house, from beginning to end. 13 “For I have told him that I am about to judge his house forever for the iniquity which he knew, because his sons brought a curse on themselves and he did not rebuke them. 14 “Therefore I have sworn to the house of Eli that the iniquity of Eli’s house shall not be atoned for by sacrifice or offering forever.”

Eli's house was judged b/c he was unwilling to restrain his sons from wickedness. In today's permissive society it is all to easy to allow your children to run with the crowd. Many fathers are just too lazy to fulfill their scriptural duty. They neglect the responsibility until one day it is too late. Fathers who are too lazy to be involved with his children while they are young often live to regret that perilous mistake.

C. Severity

This is the opposite of slothfulness. "Do not provoke" (Eph 6:4; Col 3:21). It is possible for fathers to so impose regulations and restrictions on his children that they find it impossible to live up to his expectations. Caution must be exercised so that we do not lose sensitivity toward our children. It is important to allow children to grow up and to allow them to make mistakes as their responsibilities increase.

3. Faithful Fathers Anticipate Honorable Dividends

Being a faithful father is not without rewards. That is true in all areas of our spiritual life.

Hebrews 11:6 NASB95

6 And without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is and that He is a rewarder of those who seek Him.

Faithfulness to the calling of fatherhood reaps several rewards:

A. Spirit of Contentment

When we discover all that God would have us do as husbands and fathers we can expect contentment in our lives. There is satisfaction in knowing that we are living out God's will in our lives.

B. Commendation

The father who effectively leads his family/children in the ways of the Lord will receive

commendation from many:

1) From God the Sovereign

Psalm 5:12 NASB95

12 For it is You who blesses the righteous man, O Lord, You surround him with favor as with a shield.

Psalm 84:11 NASB95

11 For the Lord God is a sun and shield; The Lord gives grace and glory; No good thing does He withhold from those who walk uprightly.

2) From the Saints

The faithfulness of the countless men and women who have gone before us having carried out their God ordained responsibilities serves as an example of how the saints honor those who are truly faithful.

3) From Society

We’re not seeking the praise of men but when we follow God's pattern for leading our families God's way, society will take notice and when they do, God is honored.

Matthew 5:16 NASB95

16 “Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven.

There is nothing as refreshing as seeing a family whose goal and purpose is to seek to glorify God. Believe me, society takes notice-they realize something is markedly different and the world will long to have that stability that comes only thru Christ.

C. Compensation

Money cannot buy what the faithful father enjoys as he views the godly life of his wife and children. These are the rich blessings that come from God the supreme example who is our heavenly Father.

Joshua was a man who followed the Lord's instruction as it pertained to his family. At the end of his life, having led some of the greatest conquests known in Israel’s history, he summarized the nation's responsibility to serve God and live for him. He had just recounted the many ways God had blessed the nation by delivering them from her enemies and Joshua exhorts that people:

Josh 24:14-21;

Joshua’s commitment that his family would serve God was part of the fabric of his life and the life of his family. He was compensated by God with his promised inheritance. Our compensation goes far beyond satisfaction of our family when they pursue godliness…for we will reap the ultimate reward:

Matthew 25:23 NASB95

23 “His master said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful slave. You were faithful with a few things, I will put you in charge of many things; enter into the joy of your master.’

There are no greater words that we could hear than those.

The motto of the faithful father is "but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord." Every father, grandfather, mother, grandmother here should ask these questions: Am I the father/mother I want to be? Am I the father/mother God wants me to be? Am I the father/mother my family expects me to be? At the end of the day, I trust we will all hear those words ... well done good ....