Week 6: Supporting Singles and Single-Parent Households (2)

Introduction

Objective: To provide biblical guidance and support for singles, single-parent households, those recovering from divorce, and young adults who are not yet married. This session will also address societal pressures and challenges specific to the Black family, including issues related to single parenthood and cultural attitudes towards marriage.

Overview:

Review of the previous week's discussion on countering societal challenges to biblical family values.Focus on the unique challenges and opportunities for singles and single-parent households within the church community.

Biblical Support for Singles and Single-Parent Households

God's Plan for Singles

Scripture Reference: 1 Corinthians 7:32-34 - "I would like you to be free from concern. An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord’s affairs—how he can please the Lord. But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world—how he can please his wife—and his interests are divided. An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord’s affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world—how she can please her husband."

Discussion Points:

The benefits of singleness for serving God wholeheartedly.Emphasize that singleness is a valid and valuable state for serving the Lord.

Scripture Reference: Isaiah 54:5 - "For your Maker is your husband—the Lord Almighty is his name—the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer; he is called the God of all the earth."Highlight God's provision and care for singles.

Supporting Single-Parent Households

Scripture Reference: James 1:27 - "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world."Discussion Points:

The church's responsibility to support and care for single-parent families.Practical ways to provide support, such as child care, financial assistance, and emotional support.

Scripture Reference: Psalm 68:5 - "A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling."Emphasize God's special concern for single-parent families and His provision for them.

Recovering from Divorce

Healing and Forgiveness

Scripture Reference: Matthew 6:14-15 - "For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins."

Discussion Points:

The importance of forgiveness in the healing process after a divorce.Steps to forgive oneself and others involved.

Scripture Reference: Psalm 147:3 - "He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds."Highlight God's promise to heal emotional wounds.

Building a New Life

Scripture Reference: Jeremiah 29:11 - "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

Discussion Points:

Encouraging a hopeful outlook for the future.Practical steps to rebuild life after divorce, including seeking community support and focusing on personal growth.

Scripture Reference: Philippians 3:13-14 - "Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."Emphasize moving forward with hope and purpose.

Guidance for Young Adults

Biblical Principles for Relationships

Scripture Reference: 2 Corinthians 6:14 - "Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?"

Discussion Points:

The importance of seeking relationships with shared faith and values.Practical advice for maintaining godly relationships.

Scripture Reference: Proverbs 3:5-6 - "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight."Encourage reliance on God's guidance in relationships.

Embracing Singleness and Preparation for Marriage

Scripture Reference: 1 Corinthians 7:8 - "Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I do."

Discussion Points:

Embracing singleness as a time for personal growth and serving God.Practical ways to prepare for a potential future marriage.

Scripture Reference: Proverbs 31:10 - "A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies."Discuss the qualities to develop in oneself and to seek in a future spouse.

Addressing the Impact of Societal Challenges on the Black Family

The Diminishing Role of the Black Man

Scripture Reference: Ephesians 5:23 - "For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior."

Discussion Points:

The societal factors that have contributed to the diminishing role of Black men in families, including systemic racism, mass incarceration, and economic challenges.The importance of restoring the biblical role of Black men as leaders, providers, and protectors within their families.

Scripture Reference: 1 Timothy 5:8 - "Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever."Emphasize the responsibility of Black men to provide for and protect their families.

The Independence of the Black Woman

Scripture Reference: Genesis 2:18 - "The Lord God said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.'"

Discussion Points:

The shift in attitudes among Black women toward independence and the belief that they do not need a man.The impact of this attitude on family cohesion and the importance of mutual support and partnership in marriage.

Scripture Reference: Proverbs 31:10-12 - "A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life."Highlight the virtues of a supportive and trustworthy wife and the need for mutual respect and cooperation in fulfilling their roles.

Sexual Impurity and Single Parenthood Among Black Men and Women

Scripture Reference: Hebrews 13:4 - "Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral."

Discussion Points:

The prevalence of sexual impurity and single parenthood among Black men and women and its impact on family stability.The importance of promoting biblical principles of sexual purity and the sanctity of marriage.

Scripture Reference: 1 Corinthians 6:18-20 - "Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies."Discuss the need to honor God with our bodies and the benefits of living according to biblical principles.

Marriageability and Societal Standards for Black Men

Scripture Reference: 1 Samuel 16:7 - "But the Lord said to Samuel, 'Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.'"

Discussion Points:

The societal standards that affect the marriageability of Black men, including income, height, and perceived status.Address the issue that many Black men who want to be married are deemed unacceptable mates because they do not meet these superficial standards.

Scripture Reference: Proverbs 31:30 - "Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised."Emphasize the importance of character, faith, and integrity over superficial qualities.

Pew Research Data and Current Challenges

Pew Research Findings:

According to a 2015 Pew Research Center report, Black children are significantly more likely to live in single-parent households compared to other racial and ethnic groups.The report highlights the economic and social challenges faced by single-parent Black families, including higher rates of poverty and lower educational attainment.

Current Challenges Faced by the Black Family:

Systemic Racism and Economic Disparities:

Systemic racism and economic disparities contribute to the instability of Black families, leading to higher rates of unemployment, underemployment, and financial stress.

Scripture Reference: Psalm 82:3-4 - "Defend the weak and the fatherless; uphold the cause of the poor and the oppressed. Rescue the weak and the needy; deliver them from the hand of the wicked."Emphasize the church's role in advocating for justice and supporting the oppressed.

Mass Incarceration:

The mass incarceration of Black men has a devastating impact on Black families, leading to the absence of fathers and husbands and perpetuating cycles of poverty and instability.

Scripture Reference: Isaiah 1:17 - "Learn to do right; seek justice. Defend the oppressed. Take up the cause of the fatherless; plead the case of the widow."Highlight the importance of prison ministry and reentry programs to support incarcerated individuals and their families.

Cultural Shifts and Changing Family Dynamics:

Cultural shifts and changing family dynamics, including the acceptance of single parenthood and the devaluation of marriage, have negatively impacted the Black family.

Scripture Reference: Romans 12:2 - "Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will."Encourage adherence to biblical values and the transformation of minds to align with God's will.

Marriageability and Societal Standards for Black Men:

A significant number of Black men who desire marriage are considered unacceptable mates due to societal standards focusing on income, height, and status rather than character and integrity.

Scripture Reference: 1 Timothy 6:6-7 - "But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it."Emphasize the importance of godliness and contentment over material wealth and superficial qualities.

Current Events Impacting the Black Family:

Economic Challenges: Ongoing economic instability disproportionately affects Black families, necessitating increased support and resources from the church.

Mental Health: The mental health crisis, particularly among Black men and single mothers, calls for greater awareness and support from the church community.

Social Isolation: The impact of social isolation due to the COVID-19 pandemic has exacerbated feelings of loneliness and disconnectedness, particularly among single-parent Black families.

Testimonies on Overcoming Societal Challenges:

Activity Format: Invite members of the Black community from the congregation to share their experiences, challenges, and successes in overcoming societal challenges.

Discussion Points:

The impact of systemic racism, economic disparities, and mass incarceration on their families.How faith and church support have played a role in their journey.

Scripture Reference: 2 Corinthians 1:3-4 - "Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God."Highlight the importance of sharing and comforting one another.

Developing Practical Support Plans:

Activity Format: Facilitate small group discussions to develop practical support plans for addressing the unique challenges faced by Black families within the church.

Discussion Points:

Identifying specific needs and challenges.Developing actionable plans for providing support, such as mentorship programs, financial assistance, and mental health resources.Scripture Reference: Galatians 6:2 - "Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ."Emphasize the importance of bearing each other's burdens within the church community.

Scripture Reference: 1 Thessalonians 5:11 - "Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing."

Highlight the importance of mutual support and encouragement within the church community.

Conclusion:

Reaffirm the importance of supporting Black families within the church community.Encourage individuals to actively seek support from the church and to participate in programs designed to strengthen and support their unique family situations.

Scripture Reference: Philippians 4:13 - "I can do all this through him who gives me strength."Stress the reliance on Christ’s strength in navigating the challenges faced by Black families.