Spiritual Disciplines - Fellowship

Happy Father’s Day

Happy Father’s day to all the dads here and watching online. Being a father is one of the greatest honors I have. As dads and as men we have many challenges and struggles. We Christian men we fight against ourselves, against sin, against the culture, and for our families. So often we question every choice and second guess ourselves. But let me tell you dads, your families and the world desperately needs us to stand up and be the fathers and men we were created to be.

There are no perfect dads here but we do have a perfect Father in heaven. So men I have an challenge for you this Father’s Day. Keep going, don’t give up, keep fighting, keep loving, keep showing your family Christ!

Spiritual Disciplines - Fellowship

I find it interesting that today we are on this last Spiritual Discipline of Fellowship and I think it is fitting because while we all need fellowship and friends, this is one area that as men we generally struggle. Men are generally pretty horrible about letting other men into their lives. But let’s be honest there is an epidemic of loneliness in our culture. This is a problem and it leads to other problems. When we try and do it alone we have no one to help us up when we fall. No one to protect when we are weak. And we can easily fall into pride which can take down any man or women in a moment.

Prevailing themes in the Bible

There are a few prevailing themes in the Bible. Topics or ideas that run through the whole of Scripture. You can take these themes and read the Bible from cover to cover and see them develop, grow, and build on themselves.

There are topics like:

Grace

Mercy

Salvation

Sin

Missions

Stewardship

and so on.

The one I want us to focus on today is Koinōnia. This is a New Testament Greek word that is loaded with meaning.

Koinonia means fellowship, partakers, partnership, participation, and communion.

The word appears in at least two different forms at least 30 different times but the idea runs throughout the NT.

1 John 1:6–7 CSB

If we say, “We have fellowship with him,” and yet we walk in darkness, we are lying and are not practicing the truth. If we walk in the light as he himself is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin.

Two Relationships in which we have Koinonia

Our relationship with God and by that I mean Father, Son and Spirit who have perfect Koinonia with each other.

Our relationships with other people.

Our Relationship with God.

TRINITY PAINTING

In this painting by Andrei Rublev from the 15th century we see some important things.

There is the perfect and connected Trinity in their fellowship with each other. They are connected and in communion. They have perfect koinonia with themself. My favorites two things from the painting is that the Trinity is complete. They lack nothing but the second is the invitation to us is present. There is a communion cup on the table and if you notice the space that is open is open to us and it too is a cup. We are invited into full fellowship with the Holy Trinity. We are invited into the completion they share.

Jesus says in John 14:19-21

John 14:19–21 CSB

In a little while the world will no longer see me, but you will see me. Because I live, you will live too. On that day you will know that I am in my Father, you are in me, and I am in you. The one who has my commands and keeps them is the one who loves me. And the one who loves me will be loved by my Father. I also will love him and will reveal myself to him.”

Jesus came to invite us into fullness and completion. Into the life He the Father and the Spirit share. This is why Paul writes in Ephesians 1,

Ephesians 1:13–14 CSB

In him you also were sealed with the promised Holy Spirit when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation, and when you believed. The Holy Spirit is the down payment of our inheritance, until the redemption of the possession, to the praise of his glory.

The indwelling of the Holy Spirit now is the promise of what is to come. Full communion with God and the blessed Trinity.

The idea is that we get our life from Jesus and that we are to be connected to Him in Koinonia or full partnership partaking life with Him. Jesus goes on to say,

John 15:17 CSB

“This is what I command you: Love one another.

We are not supposed to just love the ones who are like us, the ones who look like us, the ones who like what we like, the ones who never wrong us.

Our Relationships with Others.

Matthew 5:46–47 NLT

If you love only those who love you, what reward is there for that? Even corrupt tax collectors do that much. If you are kind only to your friends, how are you different from anyone else? Even pagans do that.

We are called by Jesus our Lord and Savior to love other believers and seek their good. In doing this we fulfill the call to love one another.

We are first secure in our koinonia with God and then we have relationships with others out of that first and primary relationship.

Koinonia in Practice?

It is not about everyone being your best friend. We need some of those and we will get there in a few minutes. But not everyone will be your best friend. When my daughter was younger every girl she met was her best friend for about 2 days.

Now don’t get me wrong you can end up with a best friend but that is not the overall point.

We are talking mostly about being in communion, fellowship, and partnership with other believers for the sake of the Gospel and the Kingdom. And for our health and vitality.

How Not to Do It.

John Wesley and George Whitefield both worked preaching circuits in mid-1700s. Together they were part of the Great Awaking. They did so much good and millions have come to Christ because of their work but here is thing, they disagreed on some major theological points. For a while they argued and refused fellowship. They wasted so much time.

These men eventually realized that it was more important to preach the Gospel and for people to see Christ than for them to argue and speak ill of each other.

This happened to Paul and Barnabas in the Bible. Acts 15. Barnabas wanted to bring along John Mark, also known as Mark. But he had previously deserted the two men on a previous trip. Paul just couldn’t bring him and the two men had to part ways. But about 10 years later Paul says this in Colossians,

Colossians 4:10 CSB

Aristarchus, my fellow prisoner, sends you greetings, as does Mark, Barnabas’s cousin (concerning whom you have received instructions: if he comes to you, welcome him),

Sometimes we just need to realize that the arguing over non-essential issues is not worth it. That holding onto our pride or unforgiveness is just not worth it. Wesley said at Whitefield’s funeral,

There are many doctrines of a less essential nature with regard to which even the most sincere children of God…are and have been divided for many ages. In these we may think and let think; we may ‘agree to disagree.

Sometimes you just need to agree to disagree and move on for the sake of the Gospel and the sake of koinonia.

Sometimes It means working with people you dislike

I have been in ministry in some form or fashion for about 20 years. I assure you there have been times when I worked with people I did not care for or get along with. People that I disagreed with but for the sake of the Gospel, for Koinonia sake we put that aside and worked together, partnered together, had communion with each other because the work was and is worth it. Npw don’t get me wrong. Some of those times I have gotten it wrong and had to receive correction.

Romans 12:18 CSB

If possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

Sometimes we are asking God to change a person and we just need to deal with the situation. We need to learn how to live at peace with them. Sometimes we are the person who needs to change.

Again, means

Koinonia means fellowship, partakers, partnership, participation, and communion.

It is important that we look at all of that because we don’t just want to look at the fun part, the good part, the make me feel warm and fuzzy part. We have to be honest that some times we have to work with people for the sake of the Gospel that we would rather not work with and sometimes we are the one the one who is the problem.

But now we can shift gears.

Wounds From a Friend

When someone corrects or speaks something difficult in love it can sting but,

Proverbs 27:5–6 CSB

Better an open reprimand than concealed love. The wounds of a friend are trustworthy, but the kisses of an enemy are excessive.

Sometimes we are so quick to break fellowship because we don’t like something when maybe we might be wrong. Sometimes the wound we feel from a friend struck in love helps us learn and grow.

I had a friend sit with me one time and tell me some hard things. He told me in love and it gave me a new perspective. He wounded me but sometimes we need to set the wound right in order of healing to come. If we are so fixated on not being hurt or offended we can never grow.

When I was in 7th grade a teacher pulled me aside after class and gently told me I smell. I was crushed because I was the smelly kid. It hurt, but I vowed that day never to be too far from a stick of deodorant.

We need People we can do battle with

It is important to not just surround ourselves with people we like and get along with but we also people we can do battle with. People we can call on when times are tough and we need help.

The great musical genius Bill Withers sang,

Lean on me When you're not strong And I'll be your friend I'll help you carry on...

For it won't be long Till I'm gonna need somebody to lean on

And King Leonidas says in 300,

No retreat, no surrender; that is Spartan law. And by Spartan law we will stand and fight... and die

Men, women, we need friends around us who we can lean on and who will stand with us to the end. We need that. We are so weak alone but together we are Christ’s Body and as His body we are strong.

1 Corinthians 12:24–26 CSB

which our respectable parts do not need. Instead, God has put the body together, giving greater honor to the less honorable, so that there would be no division in the body, but that the members would have the same concern for each other. So if one member suffers, all the members suffer with it; if one member is honored, all the members rejoice with it.

We are supposed to be working together. Together we are strong. We are called to stand together, to fight together, to defend each other. We all fall at times but when we have others around us to lift us up we can minimize the fall and the damage.

We need people around us who will fight for us and help us when we need it and we need to be that for other people.

We are to be a different Community

Acts 2:42–47 CSB

They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching, to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread, and to prayer. Everyone was filled with awe, and many wonders and signs were being performed through the apostles. Now all the believers were together and held all things in common. They sold their possessions and property and distributed the proceeds to all, as any had need. Every day they devoted themselves to meeting together in the temple, and broke bread from house to house. They ate their food with joyful and sincere hearts, praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. Every day the Lord added to their number those who were being saved.

The early church was different from others around them. They had care, concern, and love for all believers. Two of the biggest complaints the people outside had about the early church was they treated slaves like equals and they treated women like equals. This was shocking and appalling to people. The church is a place where everyone is welcomed, accepted, loved, changed, and given a suit of amor. We teach and prepare our people for battle. Both the ones they will face and the ones others will face so they can have victory together.

I want to share one last story.

When my family lived in Georgia at one point the lease was up on a house we were renting. We thought about renewing the lease because we could not afford to move or pay deposits on a new place. Then they decided to sell the house. All of the sudden we had to find a new place to live with little time and no money. A couple from our church helped us get into a place and move. We did not have to ask they just did it and told us to allow them to bless us. It was one of the most humbling experiences of my life. It was on my mind a lot the next couple of years but you know what, they never spoke of it again. They never said anything about it. They never lorded it over me or made me feel like I owed them. They showed us Koinonia in a powerful way that changed us. Their love first for God and then us humbled us.

We Are Not Alone

We are not alone. We have Jesus and if you do not have a relationship with Jesus then let this Father’s Day be the day you are reconciled to your Father in heaven.

Let God in, walk into the fullness of the Trinity that you are invited into.

And Let others in. Do not do it alone. Community, fellowship, partnership, participation is worth it.

Yes there are times of pain and struggle but it is worth it. Koinonia is worth it.