Father’s Day - A Stumbling Superhero

A Stumbling Superhero

Don’t Waste Your Dad Power

Text: Ephesians 6:4 “4 And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.”

Introduction

Listen…I am pretty new at this thing called FATHERHOOD. However, I think I am like a lot of you dads and feel like I end each day at best having stumbled in the right direction (two steps forward and three back). What are men and fathers to do? NEVER LOSE SIGHT OF HOW POWERFUL THE INFLUENCE GOD HAS GIVEN YOU!!!

There is nothing more powerful than shaping the next generation! The future of the family unit, the local church, our community, our nation, and our world begins with how every man of home uses their God given DAD POWER!

Quote: No culture will ever rise above the character of its men: fathers…. The only hope for stability and the only hope for sanity, the only hope for peace in a society is masculine, virtuous men…. Oh, there are lots of men at the gym, pretty buff, have some muscles, but they’re doing virtually nothing to stop the tide of evil in the world…. Weak, immoral men abuse women, and they produce more weak, immoral sons…. We are in some serious trouble because the current crop of men are infecting the children…. Weak men produce the death of society…. Something has to break the cycle. (John MacArthur “Act Like Men”)

If you are a husband or father, then you are in a war. War has been declared on the family—on your family and mine. Leading a family through the chaos of American culture is like leading a small patrol through enemy-occupied territory. If you doubt such a war now rages in our country, take another look at the casualty list:

Nearly one out of two marriages ends in divorce.[3]

Tonight, enough teenagers to fill the Rose Bowl, Cotton Bowl, Sugar Bowl, Fiesta Bowl, and average Super Bowl will practice prostitution to support drug addictions.

Back in 1960, most teen mothers were married; an estimated 15 percent of births to mothers ages fifteen to nineteen were to unmarried teens.

Today, it has flipped: 89 percent of those in that age group who give birth are unmarried mothers.[4]

Teens and young adults think it is more immoral not to recycle than to view porn.

Farrar, Steve. Point Man, Revised and Updated: How a Man Can Lead His Family (p. 9). Random House Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Barna Survey: (Parent you lead with a Biblical worldview)

12 times less likely to engage in extramarital sex

9 times more likely to avoid adult-only material on the internet

5 times more likely to believe that Satan is real, not just a symbol of evil

5 times less likely to believe the Bible, the Koran, and the Book of Mormon are simply different expressions of the same truths

4 times more likely to reject the idea that a person can reach Heaven through personal goodness or doing good works

Farrar, Steve. Point Man, Revised and Updated: How a Man Can Lead His Family (p. 16). Random House Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

The enemy has effectively removed fathers from their God-appointed positions of leadership and responsibility by aiming at one simple goal: destroy the boys by neutralizing the fathers. Fatherlessness, by the way, comes in many forms. It is not just physical absence or abandonment. It can come in the form of narcissistic bullying and abuse. Or it can come in the far-less-noticed form of relational detachment and emotional distance. All is fatherlessness. Farrar, Steve. Point Man, Revised and Updated: How a Man Can Lead His Family (p. 23). Random House Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

1) Every Man Is A Called Out Man/Father

Society is SCREAMING for the men to return to their God given post!

A. God plan to reach the world began with a dad

Question: What was God’s plan for transmitting His truth to the world?

ANS: Dads were to take the time to pass down all they knew about God, life, and living so their children would then pass it to their children.

Examples:

Who did Adam’s sons learn truth about God from?

Who did Noah’s sons learn truth about God from?

GOD HAD A PLAN (there were no other options)

Then there were no email, phone, google, Encyclopedias, ect.

There was a time when writing was not a reality.

God’s law was given from a Father to another (Moses)

Dad’s had to sit down with their children teach them orally.

Question — Have you ever notice the last verse of the O.T.?

Malachi 4:6 “6 And he shall turn the heart of the fathers to the children, And the heart of the children to their fathers, Lest I come and smite the earth with a curse.”

LISTEN…GOD’S PLAN HASN’T CHANGED!

If I took a survey of how much of the Bible or truth about God have you learn only from your dad, what would the results be?

“Nurture” or “training” = Setting and communicating the expectations, being clear about the consequences, and modeling the expectations yourself.

Deuteronomy 6:6–9 “6 And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: 7 And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up. 8 And thou shalt bind them for a sign upon thine hand, and they shall be as frontlets between thine eyes. 9 And thou shalt write them upon the posts of thy house, and on thy gates.

“Admonition” = cautionary advice

God clearly tells us about things that will only bring death into our lives. TELL YOUR CHILDREN!

B. Only God can fill the void you leave

A new president can be sworn into office within 24 hours.

Any shmoe can fill your position were you work.

You are replaceable in every other position you can think of BUT ONE!

C. Your children first learn about God through you

How you display your anger, what promotes your approval of them, how intentional you are in spending time with them, how well you listen to their hurts and needs…….

Some kids grow up have huge trust issues with God or even have difficulty believing God really loves them.

Dads may take their kids to church every time the doors or open, but them return home with a spirit of defeat.

A lot of misconceptions about God come from what dad has woven into their minds throughout their childhood.

Would it be AWESOME for your child’s testimony to sound like this: “I had less trouble accepting love from Jesus because of how openly loving by dad was to me.”

If your GOD CALLING does not reach your heart, don’t expect to impact the heart of your children in a powerful way!

Deuteronomy 6:5 “5 And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might.”

2) Every Father Is Called To Remove Wrath

Colossians 3:21 “21 Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.”

“to lose heart”; become discouraged and give up

A. Your children are in need of your TIME

There was a time in history that a man’s work bonded him with his son.

History — Men worked at home, women worked at home, and so did the children. Their jobs were different, but everyone worked. Moms nurtured the children until they were somewhere between five and seven, and then the boys would work alongside their fathers, and the girls would work alongside their mothers. Farrar, Steve. Point Man, Revised and Updated: How a Man Can Lead His Family (p. 29). Random House Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Author Weldon Hardenbrook gave insight to the change that took place in late 1700 to early 1800’s; Industrial Revolution — “This dramatic transition literally jolted the role of men in America. Once farmers, and the children of farmers, these men exchanged work around their homes and families for new occupations in factories. And in most cases, this new situation required men to leave their homes for long periods of time.”

Quantity Time

This can be described as simply BEING THERE!

Illustration: My kids just want to be around us. I’ll try to get off by myself to do something or practice music…think again!

YOU KIDS JUST WANT TO BE NEAR YOU!

Question: How many believers today just want to near their Heavenly Father?

LISTEN…I am not saying you need to feel guilty for having a job. I just saying BE AROUND FOR THEM.

Not being around provokes them to anger.

Quality Time

The key to this is WHAT YOU DO in the quantity time.

It is your kids asking you, “Dad, can you stop what you consider very important to you and start doing with us what we think is really important?”

It’s about give your children the BEST OF YOUR TIME…it is usually the most inconvenient time.

Examples: riding bikes, playing catch, swinging, taking a walk, camping in the backyard, catching lightning bugs, shopping, getting ice cream, praying together.

B. Your children need your AFFECTION

Question: How many of you dad have allowed your parent set the stage of how you display your affection toward your children? DONT’ RAISE YOUR HAND.

EVERY CHILD NEED LOVED, HUGGED, AND TOUCHED.

Example: How many kids come through church and you learn real quick they get very little affection at home?

Studies have shown:

Girls who go without a father’s touch often look for boys to fill that need.

Homosexual men often got very little affection from their fathers.

Sons often fall into a destructive and sinful lifestyle.

EXCUSE — I am just not a toucher by nature…YOU BETTER START BECOMING ONE!

A lack of touch provokes children to anger.

C. Your children need you to listen

Illustration — Our boys demand us to look at them for it to be considered as really listening to them.

You really have to focus both on what they have accomplished and on them. YOU CAN’T FAKE IT!

Question: How do you respond when they want your attention during your favorite show, working on a project, piddling in your favorite hobby?

Your children will find someone to listen if you won’t.

Here are some great car starters:

What foods do you like?

Who is your best friend?

What do you want to be?

What is your favorite song?

What really makes you angry?

What do you like most about your family?

D. Your children need your approval

Quote: “Children need our praise and approval as much as they need air and water. A child who feels his father’s approval will be forever secure in his love, And not only that he will feel secure in God’s love. — Todd Wilson “The Family Man”

For some of you…it is time to break the family curse of withholding praise from your children.

Your approval should never be in what they have accomplished, but rather who God has made them to be!

Not school grades

Not in behavior

Approval is not something anyone outgrows!

Illustration: There was a story of a girl who went to the extent of suicidal acts to get her daddy’s attention and to finally hear the words, “I love you.”

Quote: “Approval doesn’t come naturally. Approval only happens because a dad determines to give it. You must decide to cheer when they win and cheer even louder when they fail.” — Todd Wilson “The Family Man”

E. Your children need your discipline

Every child craves boundaries and your discipline. WHY?

There is comfort and security in knowing there are consequences when they go beyond your boundaries.

Illustration: James and the fireplace

Discipline is your way of loving them. You are helping them keep the standards you have set for them.

This is something that must be proven daily.

DADS, don’t pass this off to the wife!

Illustration: The movie “Catch Me If You Can”

F. Your children need your protection

Illustration: Sometimes there is a sign when a lifeguard is off duty “swim at your own risk.”

DAD, you are ALWAYS ON DUTY!

You are to shield their eyes from as much filth as you can.

Teach them how to “look away.”

Warn them where danger often occurs.

Dad needs to know what the kids are watching, reading, playing.

Illustration: Then seeing explicit pictures or hearing explicit language is like a rip tide; it will take them to deeper and more dangerous water.

G. Your children need unconditional love

The kind of love God gives us!

It is not a love based on performance.

Do you give love to your children outside the times they are acting lovable?

What about the bad grades, fight, behavior problem, hateful words, makes a huge mess?

VERBALLY REMIND YOUR KIDS!

While love is something to be SEEN, the seen DOES NOT replace it being HEARD!

John 3:16 “16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.”

Conclusion

You might be here today and say, “I never had a real father” or “I have been without my dad for many years now.” Listen to what God’s Word says to those without a dad — Psalm 68:5 “5 A father of the fatherless, and a judge of the widows, Is God in his holy habitation.”

When you turn to God in repentance and confess a trusting faith in Jesus as Savior and Lord of your soul, YOU NEVER ARE WITHOUT A FATHER!!! HE IS A GOOD GOOD FATHER to all who come to him through Jesus Christ!