Matthew 12:43-50: True Family

Introduction

If you have your Bibles turn to Matthew 12:43

I have been the son of a pastor my whole life and I definitely worked to look the part.

I never drank alcohol, I was a student leader for our denomination’s regional student ministries, I helped lead worship at my church, and I even led the youth group as a high school student for a time.

I did my best to never cuss, I led See You at the Pole events, and helped start and lead a Fellowship of Christian Athletes club at my school, and I even wore a purity ring.

And for all these outward appearances I was lost, because inwardly I was a selfish, sinful mess. And I was more lost than even my peers whose outward appearances at least matched their inward appearances, because as I sat back judging them and thinking I was better than them I was actually just as lost as they were, thinking I was on the right track.

But really I was just opening myself up to being in a far worse spiritual condition than I was before I tried to start cleaning my life up on my own.

Jesus warns against an attitude like this many times, but none with such visceral language as he does in today’s passage.

Let’s start reading at verse 42 and pause at verse 45.

Matthew 12:43–50 (ESV)

43 “When the unclean spirit has gone out of a person, it passes through waterless places seeking rest, but finds none. 44 Then it says, ‘I will return to my house from which I came.’ And when it comes, it finds the house empty, swept, and put in order. 45 Then it goes and brings with it seven other spirits more evil than itself, and they enter and dwell there, and the last state of that person is worse than the first. So also will it be with this evil generation.”

If you recall, Jesus is in the middle of a response to the Scribes and Pharisees who have been doing nothing except challenging, accusing, and demanding things of Jesus.

The scribes and pharisees were placing themselves in the position of the elder brothers of the rest of Israel, trying to be an example to their generation in what righteousness is supposed to look like, offering their counsel and recommendations at nearly every opportunity.

But when the true Elder Brother Jesus came, they did not recognize him. They opposed him at every turn, seeking to kill him. And this grew to the point that Jesus responded strongly in verse 39.

Jesus started his response with the statement “an evil and adulterous generation looks for a sign!”

And he gives his response telling them that they will get no sign except the “sign of Jonah,” which was a foretelling of his resurrection

And if you notice here in verse 45, he is closing off that section by repeating his accusation of them when he says, “So also will it be with this evil generation.”

You see that sandwich he made there?

It’s common in Hebrew writing to make a sandwich of statements to illustrate the main point and that everything contained within the “sandwich” is supposed to support that point.

So the sandwich begins in verse 39 with “an evil… generation...” and ends in verse 45 with “this evil generation...”

Everything between there is tied to that main point

So when you’re reading the Bible for yourself, make sure you keep your eyes open for sandwiches like this because they will help you understand the passage more clearly.

I tell you this because, we need that understanding to notice something important,

because, like Jesus’ illustration of the “strong man” in verse 29, this is another passage that gets taken out of context to try to teach demonology.

Though Jesus is stating this matter of factly, what is his purpose in bringing this idea up?

Is Jesus interrupting his response to the Pharisees so he can teach his disciples about what to expect demons to do so that they can cast them out too? Is that the main point of these verses, to teach demonology?

Or is he bringing this up to compare the current generation of Israelites to the delivered person in this section?

Jesus has clearly tied this instruction to the previous section, where he is telling off the Scribes, the Pharisees, and the rest of the generation of Jewish people that he is ministering to.

So then, what is he saying?

Jesus is saying that as he goes around casting out demons, healing diseases and getting rid of evil, clearing out the “house” that is their body and soul, the people he is helping are in great danger if they refuse to fill their house up with something else.

If they just leave the house empty then they’re just asking for something worse to come fill it up! As we know here in our area, empty houses get squatters and it makes the house worse off!

Jesus is saying is that they should be filling their house with righteousness and goodness by hearing, loving, and responding to his message with repentance and faith!

But because they are refusing to fill themselves up with what is good, even after Jesus helped cast out the evil, they will be all the more evil when they are reclaimed.

This is a warning about only seeking Jesus because you’re looking for him to remove something bad from your life instead of seeking him because you want to be overflowing with goodness!

Getting rid of the bad stuff is not enough.

Let’s continue reading with the ending of this chapter and the ending of this third section of narratives in Matthew.

Matthew 12:46–50 ESV

46 While he was still speaking to the people, behold, his mother and his brothers stood outside, asking to speak to him. 48 But he replied to the man who told him, “Who is my mother, and who are my brothers?” 49 And stretching out his hand toward his disciples, he said, “Here are my mother and my brothers! 50 For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.”

So while Jesus is finishing up his address to the people, his mother and brothers come up, asking to speak with him.

Now, quickly, you might notice there is no verse 37 in the ESV translation of this passage.

It reads “Someone told him, ‘Your mother and your brothers are standing outside, asking to speak to you.’”

This was a choice made by the translators because it is not in most of the earliest manuscripts and it is redundant. It appears to be a later insertion by a scribe.

You are free to disagree with the choice of the ESV translators if you wish, but nothing is changed in meaning by inserting or removing the verse. We can rest confident in the important part, which is understanding clearly what Jesus is saying, whether we have verse 37 or not.

Now, who does Jesus say his family is?

Is it his blood mother and brothers who are asking to speak with him?

No!

His family is comprised of those who do the will of the Father in Heaven are Jesus’ brother and sister and mother.

Two quick notes here that stand against some Roman doctrines

First, we should notice that Jesus has brothers. This demonstrates that the Roman doctrine of the perpetual virginity of Mary is false. Mary was the wife of Joseph in every way.

Second, we should notice that Jesus rejects his mother’s request for an audience. This demonstrates that the Roman doctrine of praying to Mary because she is a mediator between us and Christ is also false.

They developed that doctrine based off on the account of Jesus turning water into wine at the wedding feast. Mary requests that he would do a mighty work, and though he verbally refuses, he does what she requested.

So then, they reason, Jesus listens to his mother’s requests and we should go to her if we need something.

But here we see the opposite happening. Jesus rejects her request and even goes so far as to call the people in front of him his family instead.

and please don’t read this as Jesus standing against his family, rejecting them outright. Jesus is making an example, showing something of eternal significance, that must be read in context.

And what is the context?

Jesus is standing up against the Pharisees and their actions as the supposed elder brothers, showing that they are leading people astray into spiritual situations that are going to leave them worse off!

He is saying, “I am the true elder brother! Follow me into the Family of God where there is life, love, and peace everlasting!”

And there is a really important concept here that we have to grasp:

Though all humans are God’s creation, they are not all His children

Because who is it that Jesus claims as his family?

Matthew 12:50 ESV

50 For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.”

So then, in contrast, who are not his brother, sister, and mother? Those who do not do the will of the Father in Heaven

And what is the will of the Father?

John 6:40 ESV

40 For this is the will of my Father, that everyone who looks on the Son and believes in him should have eternal life, and I will raise him up on the last day.”

That everyone would look on Jesus, and believe in him as the Son of God who can grant them eternal life.

And so many people are quick to say that they believe Jesus is the Son of God, but their actions prove otherwise! It is not enough to simply say you believe! Again, in verse 50, Jesus says whoever does the will of the Father is his family!

Right belief requires right action!

Put your money where your mouth is! Actually do the things that God has said is his will! Like seeking to love YHWH your God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength!

Can you honestly say you have ever loved him with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength for ever one second? NO!

1 John 1:8 says you’re a liar if you claim to have perfectly loved and followed God

Until Christ resurrects us and gives us glorified bodies at his return, we strive on! Seeking to destroy sin! First in us! Then in the world!

And if we are not doing that, if we’re refusing to do the Will of the Father, why are we so quick to claim the right of being heirs for ourselves or for our loved ones?

So often it is an excuse to get out of difficult conversations about the state of our souls and their souls.

We shouldn’t enjoy telling people that they are in danger of facing the judgement of God Almighty.

But we must do it if we care for them!

Our evangelism efforts are drastically weakened if we buy into an idea that all people are God’s Children!

Our theology of salvation, our theology of God, our theology of the church is powerless if we do not realize that every single verse that talks about being a child of God is talking about Christians!

And we have to be willing to confront when people who claim to be part of our family are acting in ways that we know we are not supposed to act!

And the goal in confrontation should always be repentance and restoration, not “winning” the argument.

But we also must understand, that God invites and desires for all his human creation to know him as their Father.

So then, an understanding that not every human is a Child of God should drive us to relentless evangelism, which evangelism ultimately is an invitation to being adopted into the greatest family ever.

(Application)

Now in reflection and response to this passage, we see that We must not only remove the bad, we must also fill up with the good!

We are so quick to plead with God to remove hard things from our lives, but we are so slow to do the righteous work of following the will of the Father!

We want the benefits of being a Child of God without the responsibilities!

It’s like marrying someone for their money!

How many times have we tried to remove something bad from our lives on our own strength?!

We try to stop sinning in our own strength, working and working and working until we think we have freedom!

But then, when we least expect it, the sin pops back up with a vengeance!

Lust, gossip, hatred, bitterness, over-indulgence in God’s good gifts, legalism, judgement, or whatever other sin you are struggling with, will never be overcome until you are filled with new life in Christ!

And if you find yourself running to anything instead of Christ when the stress of life is overwhelming then that is a sinful dependence that you have on something.

Whether that’s a substance like alcohol, drugs, tobacco, or even food!,

OR if it is an action like exercise, sex (including looking at porn), or aggressive outbursts

OR if it is verbal or emotional like anger, gossip, or judgement!

And you can work your tail off trying to kick it!

You will seem to get a little bit of freedom, enough to make you think you’ve done it! You’ve finally beaten it!

But then a time comes when you are stressed out, exhausted, and weak.

And temptation comes knocking.

And if you have have spent all your energy just removing wickedness from your life and not in learning to love Christ more than you love the pleasures of your sin, when the going gets tough you will fold.

Because no matter how strong you try to make yourself, you are weak and you need your Elder Brother to strengthen you.

Is it any wonder why generations are leaving the church?

We’ve spent decades making anything more important than Jesus!

We have been satisfied to only get rid of the bad stuff and not fill up with Christ!

Instead, we have filled ourselves up with all sorts of worldly advice and entertainment and we taught our children to do likewise.

We listen to news stations that only exist to stoke sinful anger within us, causing us to be quick to hate other people instead of seeking to be Christlike in our interactions with the world.

We listen to podcasts that promote worldly unbiblical ideas of manhood and womanhood that appeal to our sinful nature, whichever direction they pull you.

Because, listen, there are sinful unbiblical teachings about how we are supposed to act as men and women on all sides, and we’re letting people who don’t know Christ or the Scriptures speak into our lives about how we should be acting. This is foolishness and it’s just asking for trouble.

We choose to fill our lives with stuff that reinforces our sin instead of filling our lives with Christ.

And we teach our children through our actions (or through our lack of action) to do the same thing!

We abdicate our responsibility to teach our children how to worship God through daily times of family worship, choosing instead to watch television until it is time to go to bed.

We let a government do the majority of the teaching in our childrens’ lives, then send them to secular colleges and expect them to pop out as followers of Jesus.

We have a responsibility to our children to fill their minds with the glories of the LORD and we are content to leave that to an hour on Sundays, letting them fill their minds with video games, shows, and a secular school system for every other hour of the week.

We also make our competitions, sports, and vacations more important than gathering weekly with other members of the blood-bought bride of Christ.

And I’m not saying to never travel or take a break, but please, don’t make it an acceptable practice to regularly miss the weekly assembly of Christians in any period of your life.

And when you do travel for vacation, make sure you find a church that is truly a church, proclaiming the same Good News as Jesus, gather with them, joyfully greet them as an ambassador of Pleasant Hill Baptist Church, and join them in their worship of our Creator.

But please don’t so devalue the weekly Sunday worship gatherings that you’re willing to miss it in order to get an early start or to get an extra morning at the beach. And if we’re willing to do this, I think it shows how little we understand the importance and beauty of the Church.

I know I’m on a tangent, but this is so important that I’m not going to stop just yet.

A couple weeks ago I was asked the question, “what makes the church beautiful?”

How would you answer that question? Take a moment and consider it. Do you even think that the church is beautiful?

What makes the church beautiful?

Christ makes the church beautiful!

He makes it beautiful by...

Do you wish to defeat sin in your life?

Fill yourself with CHRIST -

Through studying the Scriptures to understand them more clearly,

Through Praying for more knowledge and love for him and his ways

Through Listening to wise counsel whether that is from your pastor, a fellow church member, a book or audiobook by a great christian author throughout history, or through podcasts or youtube videos put out by faithful brothers and sisters.

If you need help with finding any of that, please come ask me for some recommendations and I would be overjoyed to point you in the right direction. And please remember that there are people who claim to be pastors proclaiming the Word of God and they are ultimately promoting human ideals and not the Will of the Father in Heaven.

This passage also helps us see that Evangelism Without Discipleship is Dangerous

And finally, this passage shows us how to follow Christ our Elder Brother into being sons and daughters of the Father!

Time of Response (Confession)

Scriptural Assurance

Romans 5:6–8 ESV

6 For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. 7 For one will scarcely die for a righteous person—though perhaps for a good person one would dare even to die— 8 but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.