At the Movies: Kingdom Rule #5

Good morning and welcome to River Rock Community Church. I am so glad that you made it out today. Hopefully you all received a handout as you came in, if not, let us know and we will be sure you get one. Those are also available on the website at RiverRock DOT CC / Download if you prefer the digital format.

We are continuing in our series…

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At the Movies: Kingdom Rules. What we’re doing is using a variety of movie scenes to help us explore and understand the TEN COMMANDMENTS. We know the TEN commandments are really like KINGDOM RULES.

What we know is that RULES are put in place, not to create a relationship, but they are put in place because a relationship exists. GOD’S KINGDOM RULES are here for our safety and protection. Rules that as KINGDOM CITIZENS guide and protect us and help us live in a way that HONORS GOD…HONORS OTHER PEOPLE…and ultimately helps us to experience life to the FULL.

We also know that as FOLLOWERS OF JESUS, it’s not about keeping the commands or the KINGDOM RULES so that we can be CITIZENS OF THE KINGDOM…we can’t earn our way in…we can’t earn our salvation. We know that salvation is BY GOD’S GRACE ALONE THROUGH FAITH ALONE IN JESUS ALONE. That’s it…there is no other way to be SAVED except through FAITH IN JESUS.

So if that’s true, then why are we looking at and studying the TEN COMMANDMENTS? Why should we explore and better understand these KINGDOM RULES? Because these KINGDOM RULES are in place to help us live GOD HONORING LIVES.

The first few KINGDOM RULES are all about HONORING GOD. How do we honor GOD? By having HIM as our one and only GOD…by not turning things or people into IDOLS or even using IDOLS that we think represent GOD in our worship…by KEEPING HIS NAME HOLY and not swearing by it or using it in profane ways.

And last week, we saw that we are to keep the SABBATH…meaning that we STOP the craziness of life and focus on GOD and all that HE has done for us…we focus on the blessings we have in this life and thank HIM for them.

And now we start to make this turn…we see these KINGDOM RULES shift toward HUMAN RELATIONSHIPS…the way we engage with one another. And look, when we put these KINGDOM RULES into practice and honor one another, we are ultimately HONORING GOD BECAUSE we are called to love one another the way JESUS LOVES US.

Today we are going to focus on KINGDOM RULE number 5. So go ahead and turn in your BIBLE or use the BIBLE APP and navigate over to EXODUS 20…Exodus chapter 20 and we are going to look at verse 12.

Now before we read this, I want us to all recognize and understand that we have broken this KINGDOM RULE…every single one of us has broken this one. Remember, we can’t earn SALVATION because GOD’S STANDARD is PERFECT HOLINESS…and if you break a single KINGDOM RULE, that disqualifies you…it removes you from the ranks of perfection and complete holiness. And that means that our only HOPE is found through faith in JESUS.

So let’s take a look at this verse and see what this KINGDOM RULE is…Exodus 20 and verse 12…

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Exodus 20:1-12 (CSB) 12 Honor your father and your mother so that you may have a long life in the land that the Lord your God is giving you.

This KINGDOM RULE was illustrated in our movie clip we saw earlier right.

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NEMO thought he knew better than his father so he ignored the guidance his father was giving him and led to consequences…it led to hardship and pain. It led to him not being connected to his father or his community.

But this KINGDOM RULE is complicated because our relationship with our parents changes with different stages of life.

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As little children we tend to honor our parents by doing what they ask of us. And then we grow up a little and we think, like NEMO that we know more than our parents, so we start to ignore them here and there. And of course we face the consequences of that disobedience. And hopefully we come back around and honor them by listening to them and obeying again.

Then we hit the young adult stage of life and we are making decisions based on our own understanding of the world, but we still need to honor our parents. And then we may get married and have our own children but that does not release us from this KINGDOM RULE of honoring our parents.

And then at some point we recognize that our parents are aging and not as physically or even mentally capable as they used to be. So we start adjusting to this stage and caring for them while we are raising our own kids or maybe parenting our adult children. And then they reach the end of their lives and need serious assistance and eventually they pass. And even though they are no longer present with us in this physical life, we are still called to HONOR THEM.

So this KINGDOM RULE is complicated…it’s challenging…and yet it’s one of the most important commands that we have pertaining to human relationships. It’s foundational and every other KINGDOM RULE we have around personal engagement with others builds on this one.

Honoring our parents guides us to honoring others where we live, learn, work, and play. Honoring our parents leads us to honoring other people and honoring those who are in authority over us.

This KINGDOM RULE is unique too because it comes with a promise. Honor your mother and your father so that you may have a long life in the land that the Lord your GOD is giving you.

Now I have heard some people talk about this promise as if it’s a personal promise for the individual. Honor your parents and you will live to be 100! But that’s not the case. This promise was made to the ISRAELITES as a collective community.

GOD IS SAYING, honor your parents because this is the most important relationship you will have outside of your relationship with ME. And if you HONOR THEM, you will build a good and strong foundation…you will be a person of good character…you will develop a good habit of honoring people in authority and other people in your life too. And if everyone HONORS each other, the community will thrive…there will be peace and unity.

And in Deuteronomy 5 where we see this list of commands repeated, there is an additional benefit listed. He says that the community will PROSPER. The community will see and experience success together.

Because here’s the thing…as the family goes…so goes the community. When families are healthy and there is honor and respect in the family, then the family is strong. And when families are strong, the community in which they live is strong too.

So GOD communicates with the ISRAELITES, if you honor your parents, your families will be strong and united and that will make the community strong and united too. And that will lead to success and a long existence in the land that I am giving you.

See GOD was leading them to the promised land and if they maintain strong families…that would lead to a strong community and that would lead them longevity in the promised land. It would lead to them being there for generations to come.

Think about that in our context today. Think about how strong our communities would be if people honored their parents. There would be strength and harmony and unity and success in families and that would lead to strength and harmony and unity and success in our communities.

And we have talked about this before. The family is always under attack. Satan and his minions are always going after families, because he knows that if he can create chaos in the family, it will lead to chaos in the community at large.

God handed out this KINGDOM RULE to create peace in the home and build a strong personal foundation for every person to be honorable and respectable with other people…and especially with authority figures…and all of that leads to strong unified successful communities. And future KINGDOM RULES that we will study in the coming weeks build from this command to HONOR YOUR FATHER AND YOUR MOTHER.

This KINGDOM RULE was not exclusive to the ISRAELITES for this specific moment in time. All of the KINGDOM RULES we see still have practical application for us today as we live under the NEW COVENANT that JESUS established. And JESUS brought this one up as HE was teaching and engaging. Check out this in Matthew 15…

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Matthew 15:3-6 (CSB) 4 For God said: Honor your father and your mother; and, Whoever speaks evil of father or mother must be put to death.

JESUS viewed this KINGDOM RULE as a priority…HE took it seriously. He reminded people that if you break it…not just with your actions but in your words…you should be put to death. You should be cut off from the community at the very least and even perish because of it. That’s the penalty that one deserves for breaking this command.

And the Pharisees…I almost feel sorry for them sometimes because JESUS is always up in their grill about how they have things so jacked up…but they had this command going sideways. They had put giving to the Temple above honoring parents. So people were neglecting this command to HONOR and care for their parents and using the excuse that they were doing the LORD’S WORK…they were committing their resources to the TEMPLE and JESUS called them out for it in the rest of this passage.

And they were missing out on real blessings because they were breaking this KINGDOM RULE by attempting to get different blessings for doing different things. People were saying that they were serving GOD and giving to the TEMPLE in hopes of building their own reputation in the community…in hopes of getting the praises of men.

But what they were doing was missing out on the blessings that GOD had for them by HONORING THEIR PARENTS. They were sticking to the manmade traditions instead of living by GOD’S KINGDOM RULE to honor GOD by HONORING THEIR PARENTS. JESUS wants us to HONOR OUR PARENTS because when we do, we HONOR HIM.

And look, JESUS gave us the example…HE modeled this with HIS own life. In Luke 2:51 we read…

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Luke 2:51-52 (CSB) 51 Then he went down with them and came to Nazareth and was obedient to them. His mother kept all these things in her heart. 52 And Jesus increased in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and with people.

He honored JOSEPH and MARY by being obedient to them even though HE was GOD in human form. And of course HE honored HIS HEAVENLY FATHER with HIS ENTIRE life and death on the cross. HE was surrendered to HIS HEAVENLY FATHER’S will and direction. The very night HE was arrested this happened…Matthew 26…

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Matthew 26:38-39 (CSB) 39 Going a little farther, he fell facedown and prayed, “My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will.”

So we see that this KINGDOM RULE was given BY GOD and it was reinforced by JESUS, not just in HIS teaching but also with the way HE lived. So we need to follow HIS example…we need to honor our father and mother and when we do, we will HONOR HIM with our actions and attitude and as a result we will experience GOD’S BLESSINGS.

But now let’s shift gears a little for just a minute. Let’s look at the flip side of this same coin. Yes, we are to honor our parents, but parents are called to teach their children to do this. Again looking at Deuteronomy we see this command…

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Deuteronomy 6:5-9 (CSB) 6 These words that I am giving you today are to be in your heart. 7 Repeat them to your children. Talk about them when you sit in your house and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 8 Bind them as a sign on your hand and let them be a symbol on your forehead. 9 Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your city gates.

The LORD wants us as parents to teach our children HIS KINGDOM RULES…it starts by pointing them to HIM. From there we then teach them about honoring us as parents. We give them rules to follow, we instruct them, we speak wisdom and truth into their lives and coach them as they grow.

Proverbs gives us this direction…

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Proverbs 22:6 (CSB) 6 Start a youth out on his way; even when he grows old he will not depart from it.

There are things that I still do today because of my parents. Things they taught me as a child and throughout my life…I still have those things present in me and they guide me even now as an adult. And they set rules and guidelines and when I stepped out of line…when I rebelled they corrected me and punished me.

And some people these days see this as horrible, but I can tell you that I am thankful that my parents corrected me and punished me because that shaped me into the person I am today. They taught me respect and honor…and they did it because of the love they have for me. And look it’s biblical!

When children disobey and they act out and rebel, as parents we have to discipline them. Proverbs says…

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Proverbs 19:18 (CSB) 18 Discipline your son while there is hope; don’t set your heart on being the cause of his death.

Proverbs 23:13-14 (CSB) 13 Don’t withhold discipline from a youth; if you punish him with a rod, he will not die. 14 Punish him with a rod, and you will rescue his life from Sheol.

As parents we are called to train up our children…to teach them and point them to JESUS as Savior…to teach them how to live GOD HONORING lives. To teach them to HONOR us as parents and other people around them. And part of that process includes correction.

Now, this is not a call for abuse. And I know people who have a hard time showing honor to their parents because of abuse…they have a hard time honoring their parents because they were neglected and ignored. A parent left the family and didn’t fulfill their obligation as a parent and leader in the home.

And look, if that’s your story…I want to say that I am sorry that you experienced that. I know people who have a hard time seeing GOD as HEAVENLY FATHER because of the trauma they experienced from their earthly father. And they have a hard time trusting GOD because of trauma that was experienced at the hands of their mother. And listen, if that’s you…if that’s part of your story and you have this struggle I want to share this truth with you.

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Psalms 27:10 (CSB) 10 Even if my father and mother abandon me, the Lord cares for me.

GOD, your Heavenly Father, will never turn HIS back on you. HE will never abuse you. HE loves you more than you can even imagine and HE wants to heal you…HE wants to heal your heart and give you the love that you have not experienced from your earthly parents.

And look, HE wants you to forgive them…HE wants you to forgive them for their failure. In doing so, you will experience healing and you will experience GOD’S GRACE at work in your life. And in your forgiveness you will obey GOD’s command and show them honor, even though they don’t deserve it.

And that brings us to some very practical application points for today. How do we live out this KINGDOM RULE to honor our parents in this life? First what we need to…

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Honor with obedience.

Paul states in Ephesians 6:1 and Colossians 3:20 that children should obey their parents because this is the right thing to do and that it pleases the Lord. Obeying the directions and following the rules and guidelines put forth by our parents shows them honor.

Now, the only caveat here is that if parents give direction that is in direct conflict with what GOD says, then and only then do you need to NOT obey them. If your parents tell you to steal or to worship a false god or break some other KINGDOM RULE that GOD has put in place, then you need to OBEY GOD first and not your parents. But this has to be something that is in direct conflict with something you know GOD has commanded. Otherwise, obeying the direction and rules set by parents will honor them.

Another practical thing we can do to honor parents is to praise them.

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Honor with praise.

Just simply thank them for caring for you…thank them for providing for you and meeting needs. Just simply saying thank you to your parents shows them honor. Saying thanks to them and also praising them to others…sharing with others the things that your parents do or have done for you…speaking kindly about them to others. This honors them.

And finally,

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Honor with forgiveness.

Parents are human and therefore are not perfect. You and I can honor them by extending forgiveness to them when they mess up.

There are plenty of times when I have messed up with my kids…when I overreacted to something or handled a situation in not so great of a way. And I have had to apologize to my kids. There are other times when I have offended or hurt my kids unintentionally and didn’t even know it. And there are times that my parents hurt me and didn’t realize it.

In those situations there needs to be forgiveness. When we forgive, we honor them. And look, extending forgiveness does not mean that we say what happened was ok or right. It just means that we release them from the punishment we think they deserve. This might be a one time thing and it might be a process of forgiving over and over again until we truly release the hurt that was caused.

And look, not extending forgiveness does not hurt them, it only hurts us. We think we are getting them back for what was done to us, but that’s not the case. Unforgiveness only hurts us! Not forgiving someone is like drinking poison and hoping it affects someone else. It doesn’t do anything to them but it does hurt us.

So extend forgiveness…release that hurt and forgive them and when you do you HONOR THEM and you can move forward and begin to heal from the heartache and pain you feel. And don’t wait for them to ask for it…extend it before they ask. That is what GOD has done for you and me through JESUS.

God extends us grace and forgiveness before we ever ask for it…before we even knew we needed it. God sent JESUS so that when we put our faith and trust in HIM, we experience full forgiveness of every sin we commit.

If you are here today or watching online and you have not accepted the forgiveness GOD extends to you through a relationship with JESUS, I want to invite you to do that today. Just confess your sin, ask HIM to forgive you and become LORD of your life and walk in the freedom and newness of life in relationship with JESUS. Just say this simple prayer today…

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Friends, let’s do everything we can to honor our parents. GOD has called us to do this and when we do, know that GOD will honor and bless us in the process. HE will bless us with a strong family and that will lead to the blessing of a stronger, GOD HONORING community. This KINGDOM RULE is one that truly impacts every relationship we have in this life. It is foundational for every one of us and guides us to have healthy relationships with our parents, our children, and with others.

Let’s pray.