The Christian and Boundaries

Thesis Statement: As Christians, it is important to understand and establish healthy boundaries in our relationships in order to honor God and protect ourselves and others.

OBJECTIVES

What is a boundary?

Is it God’s Will for You to Have Boundaries?

How do you know if you have a problem with Boundaries?

1. What is a boundary?

Established limits/lines that are not to be crossed.

Relationship boundaries can be built around repercussions and rewards. When a friend crosses the line with you by using angry, inappropriate and explosive words, you respond by enacting a repercussion … you disengage and leave.

Boundaries are about us … not about controlling another person. They require us to take responsibility for our own attitudes and beliefs, thoughts and choices, feelings and needs, time and talents–ours … no one else’s.

Romans 12:18 ESV

If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.

Question: To become the Christian God wants us to be, do we need boundaries with firm and fair repercussions and rewards?

God defines these boundaries in His Word so that we don’t have to wonder, feel guilty or struggle to figure them out. His will for each of us is to …

Boundaries help us to be clear about what we’re for and against … and what we will and won’t tolerate in our relationships.

2. Is it God’s Will for You to Have Boundaries?

Yes, because we all need boundaries with fairly administered repercussions and rewards … principles of right and wrong to give us freedom.

God has established these boundaries in his word. His will is for each of us to:

Be treated with respect

1 Peter 2:17 ESV

Honor everyone. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honor the emperor.

Express anger appropriately toward one another—when justified

Ephesians 4:26 ESV

Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger,

Be heard and taken seriously

James 1:19 ESV

Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger;

Be allowed to make mistakes and then take responsibility for them, and for others to take responsibility for their own mistakes.

Philippians 3:12 ESV

Not that I have already obtained this or am already perfect, but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own.

Be able to say “No” without feeling guilty

Titus 2:12 ESV

training us to renounce ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in the present age,

3. How do you know if you have a problem with boundaries?

Is your life really your own, or is it controlled by someone else?

Do you find yourself easily taken advantage of by others?

Do you think everyone else’s needs are yours to meet?