The secret life of a Leader
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The Secret life of a Leader
As leader one of the battles we are battling is time.
One of the things that I feel like I don’t have enough of is time.
If we are honest we don’t have much time. We literally have to fight for time.
Time is precious.
So teach us to number our days, That we may gain a heart of wisdom.
Teach - hoda- meaning to impart knowledge to, to instruct.
The psalmist is saying Lord reveal to us the gravity of our days.
When we number our days we think soberly about the days we have.
We number allot of things offerings, church members, how many cars are in the parking lot.
(BTW please stop worrying filling the seats at your church, just fill the ones who are in the seats. And the church will grow.)
We number allot of things!
But when we number our days we realize how short they really are. And it forces us to look at reality for what it is.
When we number our days we live with an eternal perspective.
Because we are so busy often times we don’t make room for God. But Gods desire if for us to have solitude.
Solitude is not loneliness
Solitude and loneliness are two different things.
Loneliness is inner emptiness. Solitude is inner fulfilment.
Richard Foster
You have two sides of being alone you have loneliness which expresses the pain of being alone, and solitude which expresses the glory of being alone.
Sometimes as leaders we can be very lonely and isolated. We don’t like people to get in maybe because of insecurity. But we tend to isolate.
A man who isolates himself seeks his own desire; He rages against all wise judgment.
When you isolate yourself you feed your own desires and those desires become a center piece of your life.
Your desires become at the center. Instead of you having a Christocentric relationship with God you become the center.
Selfishness is typically the root of all isolation
Selfishness naturally separates you from community and, even worse, makes you unfriendly to those who should matter the most. ( the people that matter the most are the ones you should be leading or Pastoring)
But it gets worsts!! Unfriendliness and unreasonableness, go hand in hand these are the outpouring of isolation. ( You cant reason with an isolated leader. Theres no persuading them.) Sometimes we can be isolated mentally before we are physically isolated.
The one who isolates himself rages against wisdom.
In times of isolation its easy to discard wisdom. You just don’t see the value.
When you isolate yourself essentially what you are saying is that I follow my own counsel.
There’s no submission to authority.
When you isolate yourself the tendency is to create a world that just compliments you and promotes you.
I person who isolates themselves never gets challenged. So therefore they never grow.
As a leader we’re not selective in who we serve and who we are around.
Even as a Pastor we can feel isolated. I’m 30 minutes away from Baltimore and at times, I feel 3,000 miles away. You can even be in your own church and still feel alone. Something I’m learning as a Pastor is to allow the church I Pastor to minister to me.
These are sensual persons, who cause divisions, not having the Spirit.
There will be people in the church that like to cause isolation. The reason why they can cause isolation because they are isolated themselves.
Isolation can be a passive leader.
He who is not with Me is against Me, and he who does not gather with Me scatters abroad.
The gospel doesn’t give room for neutrality
A leader who is indifferent actually scatters.
One who refuses to serve the body scatters.
I remember when I was told that God was calling me to be a Pastor. I honesty didn’t want it. I would’ve preferred to live isolated.
But when I first seen the local Zimbabweans and how much joy it brought the church I was overjoyed.
There are times to isolate if someone has deviated from the scriptures.
To separate from apostasy is right and Scriptural. To separate from what is of God is schism and heresy. H.A. Ironside
Talk to your neighbor
What can you do to become more deeply connected to people in your church?
We are not getting alone for the sake of being alone but we are getting alone for the sake of being with God.
And As leaders solitude can be an after thought because functionally we can be consumed with so many details.
See solitude is not optional and its just not good advice but its a command.
But you, when you pray, go into your room, and when you have shut your door, pray to your Father who is in the secret place; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you openly.
We pray in secret so God will reward us openly.
God wants is to be in a concealed place with no distraction. Find that place.
Jesus is giving direction for our prayers and indicating that our prayer life must be in solitude with a single eye on God, not with a side glance at people who could be impressed.
Thats why solitude is important before theres no one else you are trying to impress. You can just be brutally honest with God.
I don’t have a side glance at others I’m just fixated on God.
I have tunnel vision me and God.
looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.
Jesus had tunnel vision. The secret place cultivates that!
Look to Abraham your father, And to Sarah who bore you; For I called him alone, And blessed him and increased him.”
Abraham discovered God in solitude. He was called by God in solitude.
“The secret of religion is religion in secret” (McNeile).
As leaders we need to have a secret life with God.
It seems like the larger Jesus ministry grew The more Jesus went in solitude.
The secret place will exclude other people but not God; he is there, in the secret place.
Gods presence is in the secret place.
Our devotion to prayer and solitude can carry us through the hardest times. We see that with Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane.
Then Jesus came with them to a place called Gethsemane, and said to the disciples, “Sit here while I go and pray over there.”
Jesus and His disciples went to the Garden of Gethsemane which is believed to be owned by a friend of Jesus.
But this garden Jesus visited frequently.
Jesus had a frequent place that He would pray in solitude.
Thats why Judas was able to lead the soldiers there because of how often they went to this place.
- When it comes to solitude we want to have a frequent place. A place where its known to be quite and you can enter into prayer.
Jesus didn’t come to Gethsemane for a light conversation but these where the last minutes of freedom.
- The same thing with us we don’t set outside time for prayer and solitude for small talk but we are serious when entering to a prayer with the Almighty God. With full attention and reverence!
And He took with Him Peter and the two sons of Zebedee, and He began to be sorrowful and deeply distressed.
Then He said to them, “My soul is exceedingly sorrowful, even to death. Stay here and watch with Me.”
Jesus mind was so overwhelmed with sorrow and emotional distress.
It was so bad that at that moment he was at the point of death. Thats how great the distress was .
He went a little farther and fell on His face, and prayed, saying, “O My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from Me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as You will.”
Jesus went about a stones throw away from His disciples.
He fell on His face which means He adopted the lowest posture for this significant prayer.
When Jesus prayed He said “O My Father, if its possible” meaning that Jesus isn’t pressing for anything that is against the Fathers will.
The kind of death and humiliation Jesus would face the human naturally would shrink from that kind of death.
But also we see Jesus determination to do the Fathers will despite of outward circumstances.
So He prayed for the avoidance of death on the cross but only if its within the Fathers plan.
Let this cup pass from me- In the OT the cup has associations with suffering and the wrath of God.
Upon the wicked He will rain coals; Fire and brimstone and a burning wind Shall be the portion of their cup.
Awake, awake! Stand up, O Jerusalem, You who have drunk at the hand of the Lord The cup of His fury; You have drunk the dregs of the cup of trembling, And drained it out.
You will be filled with drunkenness and sorrow, The cup of horror and desolation, The cup of your sister Samaria.
Jesus death meant suffering and because it was for the sin of the entire world the wrath of God was associated with this death.
“Not as I will, but as You will.”
Jesus is not trying to oppose His will on God, But this is Him actually accepting the will of The Father.
It is the will of the Father is the chief concern of Jesus.
These words were utter in alone time with Christ. In solitude.
Then He came to the disciples and found them sleeping, and said to Peter, “What! Could you not watch with Me one hour?
Watch and pray, lest you enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.”
Jesus is calling out to His disciples can you just stay up for only one hour to pray.
Can you be in solitude for one hour?
Jesus disciples where so far from understanding the situation at hand that they went tot sleep.
I believe Jesus is still calling out to a sleeping church governed by other agendas.
He’s saying wake up to the church!
- Watch and pray unless you enter into temptation.
We can be overwhelmed by temptation because theres no life of solitude.
How may we benefit from solitude?
When Jesus heard it, He departed from there by boat to a deserted place by Himself. But when the multitudes heard it, they followed Him on foot from the cities.
After Jesus heard about the death of John the Baptist. He went into a quite place to grieve.
Solitude can be time to deal privately with pain. Jesus sought solitude after the news of John’s death. Sometimes we may need to deal with our grief alone. Jesus did not dwell on his grief, but returned to the ministry he came to do.
Side note: how many of you have a team in your church to handle grief and trauma? If you don’t have anything like that you will be the one doing all the grief counseling.
How you deal with grief is how you minister to others about there grief.
It took solitude for Jesus to process the grief to return back to the mission.
As leaders we do have to find away to grieve properly.
Thats one of the stumbling blocks of most leaders, we are so use to dealing with everyone else's grief we forget to deal with our own.
Solitude prioritizes God in the issues and allow God to do the healing.
And when He had sent the multitudes away, He went up on the mountain by Himself to pray. Now when evening came, He was alone there.
But the boat was now in the middle of the sea, tossed by the waves, for the wind was contrary.
Solitude can be time spent in the presence of God. What you value is what you persue. You being in the presence of God is worth everything.
Seeking solitude was an important priority for Jesus. He made room in his busy schedule to be alone with the Father.
As leaders we have very busy schedules. We have to prioritize God. We make room for other things that matter. Why not God.
Spending time with God in prayer nurtures a vital relationship and equips us to meet life’s challenges and struggles.
Being in solitude helps us to win the day. Helps us to properly engage life with Gods mind!
Develop the discipline of spending time alone with God—it will help you grow spiritually and become more and more like Christ.
Spiritual growth is in solitude.
Early the next morning Jesus went out into the wilderness.… (Luke 4:42 )
Luke 4:42 (NKJV)
Now when it was day, He departed and went into a deserted place. And the crowd sought Him and came to Him, and tried to keep Him from leaving them;
Early morning solitude.
Psalm 63:1 (NKJV)
O God, You are my God; Early will I seek You; My soul thirsts for You; My flesh longs for You In a dry and thirsty land Where there is no water.
Psalm 5:3 (NKJV)
My voice You shall hear in the morning, O Lord; In the morning I will direct it to You, And I will look up.
Schedule your time for solitude.
I love what PR said “I have a team schedule, a church schedule, and a personal schedule.”
Making a schedule for solitude was the best thing I’ve done.
My schedule on a normal week is I work from 6:00am - 2:30 Pm I study from 2:45-5:00pm then pick up my kids by 5:30 pm and travel home and I’m with my family through the night.
Solitude is important for prayer and refreshment, but will only be possible if we make it a priority. Jesus had to get up very early just to get some time alone. If Jesus needed solitude for prayer and refreshment, how much more is this true for us? Don’t become so busy that life turns into a flurry of activity leaving no room for quiet fellowship alone with God. No matter how much you have to do, you should always have time for prayer.
So I want us to do an execerise.
I want you to write out your schedule Monday - Sunday and see when you have time for solitude.
Some of you already have time for solitude.
Some of you need to make time.
So lets just take a couple minutes to do that.
Ask yourself how can I work out solitude in my schedule.
There is warfare against solitude
The number one attack on the Christian is an attack against time.
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ,
which He worked in Christ when He raised Him from the dead and seated Him at His right hand in the heavenly places,
and raised us up together, and made us sit together in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus,
to the intent that now the manifold wisdom of God might be made known by the church to the principalities and powers in the heavenly places,
For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.
Story of the Johnny upstairs