The Comparison Trap of this Crazy Life

INTRODUCTION

Open your Bibles and join me in 2 Corinthians 10.

**SCHEDULE CHANGE**

We are tempted every day—no matter who we are—by the trap of comparison. I call it a trap because, a lot of times, it’s happening in our minds/hearts before we even realize it.

If you’re a young mom, you may see a mom doing it “better” than you. You see someone wearing things you can’t afford that supposedly gives you some kind of social status. You see someone who is more successful than you. Maybe they made the team/got better grades/a better voice/got the accolade/promotion…

And, we compare ourselves (our identity, our worth) to them—what we don’t have, what we don’t do, what we AREN’T, and the end result is…

COMPARISON ROBS US OF JOY

Comparison is measuring ourselves (our worth, our identity, our status, etc) up against a standard of someone or something.

>>TRANSITION<<

CONTEXT: Here in 2 Corinthians 10, the Apostle Paul is defending himself/his ministry/calling against being compared to a group within the church of Corinth known as “super-apostles.”

This group had come into the church in Corinth claiming to be “super-gifted apostles.” They were turning the believers in Corinth against Paul. They were accusing him of being two-faced (timid and bold) — the equivalent of a keyboard warrior. They were claiming that his apostleship was insufficient. They were saying that Paul wasn’t as gifted or as eloquent of a speaker as they were.

2 Corinthians 10:7–18 (ESV)

Look at what is before your eyes. If anyone is confident that he is Christ’s, let him remind himself that just as he is Christ’s, so also are we. For even if I boast a little too much of our authority, which the Lord gave for building you up and not for destroying you, I will not be ashamed. I do not want to appear to be frightening you with my letters. For they say, “His letters are weighty and strong, but his bodily presence is weak, and his speech of no account.” Let such a person understand that what we say by letter when absent, we do when present. Not that we dare to classify or compare ourselves with some of those who are commending themselves. But when they measure themselves by one another and compare themselves with one another, they are without understanding.

But we will not boast beyond limits, but will boast only with regard to the area of influence God assigned to us, to reach even to you. For we are not overextending ourselves, as though we did not reach you. For we were the first to come all the way to you with the gospel of Christ. We do not boast beyond limit in the labors of others. But our hope is that as your faith increases, our area of influence among you may be greatly enlarged, so that we may preach the gospel in lands beyond you, without boasting of work already done in another’s area of influence. “Let the one who boasts, boast in the Lord.” For it is not the one who commends himself who is approved, but the one whom the Lord commends.

The trap of comparison has three roots:

Insecurity (We’re insecure about who we are—“I’m incomplete without…”)

Discontentment (We aren’t satisfied with what we have — “I’m unhappy without…”)

Envy (We “I’ll do whatever to get/be…”)

How can we be freed from the comparison trap? Well, here are three things, I think Paul shows us in this text.

Identity

Now, I think it might be easy to read this text and assume that Paul is insecure. I mean, he’s writing very strongly to defend himself.

Paul knows who he is in Christ. All you’ve got to do is read any of his letters in which he shares his testimony/story.

Paul’s whole life story BEFORE HE WAS RADICALLY SAVED ON THE ROAD TO DAMASCUS is about how he THOUGHT much of himself, MADE much of himself, and lived with a whole lot of pride. That’s because, again if you know his story, Paul was a self-made religious leader. He excelled in the OT law. But Paul says in Galatians that all of that is rubbish/trash/garbage compared to knowing and being known by Jesus.

And, then, after he got saved, he became the greatest missionary the world has ever known—planted churches all over Asia Minor…wrote most of the NT.

Now, there’s nothing wrong with pursuing excellence in your field…or your vocation…or what God has called you to be.

Students—you should want to strive to make the best grades this year that you can make.

Adults—you should want to be promoted/be the best.

Being a parent…

Your identity is not in these things! Paul’s identity was NOT in being an apostle or a preacher or a church planter. His confidence was in who had loved him and called him.

Because Paul placed his identity “in Christ,” his worth as not found in the ever-changing things of this world. His identity was found in who he was in Jesus as a child of God adopted into the family of God.

My family and I have loved watching the Olympic Games over the last two weeks. Our living room has turned into a cheering section as we’ve been rooting for the American athletes. One of those athletes is a young female diver named Alison Gibson. Alison first competed in the Tokyo Olympics a few years ago and so badly underperformed that she quit diving and swore she’d never return. Well, the people close to her convinced her to start training again and she qualified for the Paris Olympics. A couple of days ago, in her first Olympic dive since returning, her feet clipped the diving board and she scored a ZERO. Here she is on the world stage. She’s mentally come back from a really dark place and is trying again…and she fails in front of millions of people. I was crushed for her. Listen to what she wrote on social media:

“I asked God why so many times. I was called back into diving a year ago. I won nationals. I qualified the Olympic quota spot at Worlds. I qualified for the Olympics. I made it this far. Just to have it end with a crushing heartbreak. I poured my heart and my soul into training. I sacrificed so much. I’ve asked myself what I did to deserve this. I have walked diligently and faithfully every step of the way. It doesn’t feel fair,” Gibson wrote. “Over the past 24 hours, I’ve cried, and I have been angry. I’ve asked, ‘why would a good God let me make it all the way to this stage just to allow me to get crushed in front of the world?’ This is hard, and my faith has been tested.” “Even though my competition didn’t go the way I wanted. And even though I feel like the world is trying to tear me down piece by piece and leave me shattered, I will keep my chin up because I know that my value and worth come from God.”

Paul says, in vs. 12…

2 Corinthians 10:12–13 (ESV)

Not that we dare to classify or compare ourselves with some of those who are commending themselves. But when they measure themselves by one another and compare themselves with one another, they are without understanding.

By what standard are you measuring yourself? Are you measuring yourself against what the trending things are on TikTok or Instagram—the people who are making much of themselves? Or, is your identity found in Christ and who he has made you and saved you to be?

If we’re going to avoid the trap of comparison, the second thing we’ve got to remember is that we’ve got to live with…

Gratitude

Gratitude is the antidote for discontentment. Discontentment, again, says “I’m unhappy without _______…I’m not satisfied with who I am/what I have.”

Some of you are discontent with the way you look. You’re unhappy because you don’t have the brand name clothes or the brand new car (students), you don’t take all of the extravagant vacations…maybe you’re just barely scraping by…some of you are young adults who are looking at friends your age who are getting married/having kids and you are not. You’re discontent.…maybe you’re looking at other families…parents with other kids and you’re thinking, “We would just be happier if our kids were like theirs…”

Paul is being attacked by these guys who, by his own admission, are more eloquent speakers than he is.

2 Corinthians 10:10 (ESV)

For they say, “His letters are weighty and strong, but his bodily presence is weak, and his speech of no account.”

Get the picture here, Paul apparently was not a big stout guy and this incredible preacher. But he was used mightily by God. Why? Because of God’s grace in his life…all because of His grace. Paul even says, here, all I did among you was by God’s grace.

Philippians 4:11–13 (ESV)

Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me.

Paul is always aware of who he is—always aware of his weaknesses…his inadequacies.

In chapter 12, Paul writes about what God taught him in the midst of weakness/worldly insufficiency— “My grace is sufficient for you.”

In Greek, the words “gratitude” and “grace” share the same root. In other words…gratitude is our response to God’s grace. And, Paul says, God’s grace is sufficient. It’s what matters most. It’s enough.

Humility

(Vs. 17-18)

Not only are our “inadequacies” intended, by God, to lead us to gratitude, God intends them to lead us to a place of humility and dependence.

Paul talks a lot in this passage about “boasting.” He also talks about it in chapters 11 and 12, too. It seems kind of strange that Paul is defending himself and his supposed “inadequacies” and boasting. That’s kind of the opposite of humility, isn’t it? But, here’s what Paul boasted about.

Look at verses 13-18. Paul says, “I’m boasting in what God has given to me. I’m boasting in what God has called me to. I’m boasting in what God has done in me and through me. I’m not looking to others for approval or applause. I’m looking to Jesus!”

Listen—when we find ourselves in the comparison trap, we lose our joy. When we find ourselves in the comparison trap it means that our eyes are not on Jesus. They’re on someone/something else—and it might just be that we’re guilty of idolatry.

Turn your eyes upon Jesus Look full in His wonderful face And the things of earth will grow strangely dim In the light of His glory and grace

CONCLUSION

Believer, break free from the comparison trap by anchoring your identity in Christ, practicing gratitude, and embracing humility.

Let me ask you this question—forget what others may say about you..or what you would say about yourself. What does God say about you? Don’t compare yourself to other people that you consider good Christians. It’s not about how you measure up to others. Paul says, it’s about what God says. Our biggest need is forgiveness of our sin.

God is holy. We can’t measure up to His standard of righteousness. That’s why Jesus—why the cross.