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Words of Comfort:
What can I say to this family to give them comfort. One of the things that I learned about being a preacher is that when a family has lost a love one, we have the duty number one to speak well of the deceased (eulogize), secondly we have to speak words of comfort to the family, thirdly, we have the responsibility not to proselyte someone during a funeral, not to try and convict them of their sins during a funeral.....most people are aware of their sins and they don’t need us to hammer them and make them feel worse because it turns from what the family needs to what we think they need and to me that is a bit insensitive.
I believe that majority of the eulogist responsibility should be 40% speaking well of the deceased, 40% speaking comfort to the family, 10% or concluding with an invitation to those who do not know Christ to know Him and accept Him as savior. Ideally speaking of course....there are times where the preacher may not know the deceased.....so the percentages may change depending upon the person.....but really depending on how the Lord leads one.
I. Eulogy:
What good can I say about Mother Elizabeth Ann Conner? Well, yall gonna have to forgive me today because I’m going to be myself. This family knows their pastor.....and they know that this pastor is serious but has a humorous side.
What good can I say about Mother Ann Conner.....SHE WAS MY ACE! I LOVED HER! I didn’t really get to know Mother Conner until she used to come to Victory Chorus rehearsal with Hope. When she would see me, she always said something that had me laughing and I thought that was strange because I thought that most mothers in the church were of serious business.
But Mother Conner, is my type of people....she was one of the few that I could legitimately be myself.
When I became pastor, I not only became her pastor, but she became my friend.
When she got to the point that she was unable to attend services I would go visit with her. And Fern always knew when I was in the house....because she would hear us cutting up in the room. Can’t do that with everyone....but with her....I allowed her to be herself and she allowed me to be myself.
There is a lesson to be learned there.....hear this lesson from Mother Ann Conner.....STOP PROJECTING ON PEOPLE WHAT YOU THINK THEY OUGHT TO BE AND HOW THEY OUGHT TO ACT AND LEARN TO LOVE THEM WHERE THEY ARE AND LOVE THEM FOR WHO THEY ARE!!! BECAUSE THAT’S HOW JESUS LOVES US!!!
Even the nurses, when I went to see her in the hospital....was scratching there head.....because it was quiet on the unit until I walked in the room and then they heard laughter to speaking in tongues. It was nothing for us to be laughing and cracking jokes, me, my wife, Mother Conner, Fern, Toni, and then go in to prayer and the glory of the LORD hit the house and the Holy Ghost would move her in the bed, and everyone in the house would begin to speak in tongues and praise the Lord!
Before she passed, I received a phone call during church Fern, asked me to come pray for Mom because she had taken a turn for the worse. I immediately left the service went to Vinton, went in the house and laid hands and the power of the Holy Ghost filled the room and touched her. Toni told me the next day, Mom is doing much better and seems more like herself.
She was in the hospital, got a call again, went and laid hands and it was the same result she got better.
This time I got the call while I was on vacation. Two day before I was to come back from vacation. I said “Lord.....keep her until I can get there......if I can just lay hands on her and pray the prayer of faith....I believe she will recover. I dispatched Basham to Vinton since I couldn’t be there. I thought she’d be fine until I could get there....but then Toni called because she wanted the Bishop to pray over the phone.
I prayed, I had faith.....but some kind of way I prayed “Lord let your will be done.” Sunday I got the call that Mom was gone.” I said Lord “why” and the Lord told me.....I honored your request twice......twice I extended her life.....this time.....I took her because she was tired and it was her time to go.
And the only thing I could say was “Yes Lord”. In the flesh it is hard to say “Yes Lord” because sometimes when you say “Yes Lord” it hurts. And this is a moment in which the family is hurting, this a moment in which her church family and her friends and those whom she impacted is hurting......BUT IS THERE ANYONE IN HERE THAT STILL HAS A “YES LORD IN THEIR SPIRIT?” CAN YOU LIFT YOUR HANDS RIGHT NOW AND SAY YES LORD!?
HOW CAN YOU SAY “YES LORD AT A TIME LIKE THIS”?
I can say Yes Lord because Jesus said “Yes Lord”......Jesus said not my will but thine will be done. He was getting ready to die and although he was God manifested in the flesh, he was both human and divine. His human nature didn’t want to suffer and our human nature doesn’t want to suffer. The bible said “He feared” that’s in the book of Hebrews. Hebrews 5:7
Who in the days of his flesh, when he had offered up prayers and supplications with strong crying and tears unto him that was able to save him from death, and was heard in that he feared;
The scripture then says that God heard Him because of his deep reverence and that Jesus learned obedience from the things that he suffered, and because of this it qualified him to be our Great High Priest.
Then Hebrews 12:2 says:
Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God.
IN ORDER TO GET TO JOY.....JESUS HAD TO SUFFER.....JESUS HAD TO DIE......AND JESUS HAD TO SAY “YES LORD”. And in order for you to reach joy.....you’re going to have to suffer in this life.
But I got good news for you family......Because Mother Ann said Yes Lord......because Mother Ann went through suffering......SHE REACHED JOY!!!!
Paul told Timothy in 2 Timothy 2:12
If we suffer, we shall also reign with him: if we deny him, he also will deny us:
But the God of all grace, who hath called us unto his eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after that ye have suffered a while, make you perfect, stablish, strengthen, settle you.
Mother Conner may have suffered, but AFTERWHILE......COME ON HELP ME PREACH THIS MORNING AND TELL YOUR NEIGHBOR SAY “AFTERWHILE”........GOD IS GOING TO MAKE PERFECT.......SAY “AFTERWHILE”.........GOD IS GOING TO STABLISH.....MOTHER CONNER WAS WEAK.......BUT AFTERWHILE......GOD IS GOING TO STRENGTHEN........SHE MAY BE IN TRANSIT RIGHT NOW.....SHE MAY BE RESTING IN THE LORD......BUT AFTERWHILE.....GOD IS GOING TO SETTLE HER!
AND THAT’S WHY YOU CAN LIFT YOUR HANDS AND SAY YES LORD!
BECAUSE WEEPING MAY ENDURE FOR A NIGHT.....BUT JOY IS COMING IN THE MORNING......IT’S NIGHT TIME RIGHT NOW.....YOUR GOING TO HAVE SOME DARK DAYS....BUT ENCOURAGE YOURSELF WITH THIS WORD.......JOY IS GOING TO COME IN THE MORNING!!! IF YOU BELIEVE IT.....CAN YOU LIFT YOUR HANDS AND SAY YES LORD!!!!
I CAN SAY YES LORD BECAUSE:
We are confident, I say, and willing rather to be absent from the body, and to be present with the Lord.
FAMILY AND FRIENDS, BROTHERS AND SISTERS.....I’M JUST TRYING TO HELP AND ENCOURAGE YOU TO LET YOU KNOW THAT ALTHOUGH DEATH HAS STEPPED IN......WE STILL HAVE THE VICTORY. ANN HAS THE VICTORY......WE CAN SAY YES LORD BECAUSE SHE NEVER LOST HER FAITH!!!
WE CAN LIFT OUR HANDS AND SAY YES LORD......BECAUSE SHE SAID YES LORD!!!! WE CAN CELEBRATE BECAUSE ANN SAID YES LORD......SHE SAID YES LORD WHEN SHE REPENTED, SHE SAID YES LORD WHEN SHE WAS BAPTIZED IN JESUS NAME’ SHE SAID YES LORD WHEN SHE RECEIVED THE HOLY GHOST!!!!
BEFORE I TAKE MY SEAT......IS THERE ANYONE IN HERE THAT CAN STAND TO THEIR FEET, LIFT THEIR HANDS, AND SAY YES LORD......I MAY NOT UNDERSTAND BUT YES LORD, IT MAY NOT FEEL GOOD BUT YES LORD........I SAY YES LORD......BECAUSE:
But I would not have you to be ignorant, brethren, concerning them which are asleep, that ye sorrow not, even as others which have no hope. For if we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so them also which sleep in Jesus will God bring with him. For this we say unto you by the word of the Lord, that we which are alive and remain unto the coming of the Lord shall not prevent them which are asleep. For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the trump of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise first: Then we which are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds, to meet the Lord in the air: and so shall we ever be with the Lord. Wherefore comfort one another with these words.
YES LORD!!!