Authentic, Apostolic, Eucharistic

“Wisdom has built her house, she has set up her seven columns; she has dressed her meat, mixed her wine, yes she has spread her table. She has sent out her maidens; she calls from the heights out over the city: ‘Let whoever is simple turn in here.’”

“Men don’t know how to be men anymore.” [Repeat.] To me, it feels like I’ve heard that constantly for close to a decade. “Men don’t know how to be men anymore.” And I hear it from two warring factions. On one side, we’ve got 2017’s #MeToo. Now, please don’t misunderstand me: If you feel like you’ve been abused or harassed, my office is a safe space; you and I can figure out the next steps together as best we can. But in general, this side for the last 7 years has told men everything that’s wrong with them—from toxic masculinity to perpetuating systemic misogyny—but, from what I’ve seen, has provided little to no alternative to what it thinks authentic masculinity looks like.

But then on the other side, we’ve got what’s known as the “Red Pill Manosphere.” It’s really a response to the fallout of 2017. The “red pill,” for you Zoomers and Gen Alphas out there, is a Matrix reference to an awakening of a difficult but hidden reality. “Manosphere” describes this online community as a safe space for men to be themselves and learn how to be real men. What does it propose as authentic masculinity? In short, it pretty much leans into every accusation from #MeToo. The alternative to #MeToo, to the Red Pill Manosphere, is the kind of man #MeToo stands against. Between these two factions, there’s really no new trait that’s proposed for what makes authentic masculinity. In sum, men don’t know how to be men because no one has suggestions on what is an authentic man.

That’s what was on my mind as I read today’s first reading. From the author of Proverbs, we see that Wisdom has prepared a place for people to come and enjoy the banquet she’s gathered. Her task now is to send her maids out to invite people to this banquet. But this selection isn’t the whole chapter, and I honestly wish the whole chapter was read.

The rest of Proverbs 9 contrasts Wisdom’s house, Wisdom’s banquet, with the woman of Folly. Folly has also prepared a banquet to invite people over. But she’s the antithesis to Wisdom. Where Wisdom has built her own house, Folly lives in the city heights, which implies she’s the inheritance kind of wealthy. Where Wisdom sends out servants to the streets to invite people to her banquet, Folly just sits at her door and invites whoever happens to pass by. And where Wisdom has actually prepared her own food, Folly fully admits that “stolen water is sweet, and bread taken secretly is pleasing.” And in admitting this, Folly, whether knowingly or unknowingly, admits she is a parody of Wisdom. That’s essentially what these two factions between #MeToo and the Manosphere present: they present parodies of authentic masculinity—one of accusing men of having certain toxic traits, and the other for doubling down on those toxic traits.

But the real foil, the real alternative in presenting an authentic masculinity is none other than our Lord Jesus Christ. These last few weeks, you and I have explored John 6 with this being our second-to-last installment. If you need more detailed refreshers, please go to our website, follow our podcast, and give my homilies another listen. But in summary, we presented God as the one who handfeeds us, and that what’s actually in that hand of God is nothing but a nail hole, that is, the flesh and blood of Christ, the free and total gift of himself. And by feeding us his very flesh and blood, he teaches us what authentic masculinity looks like, because he, like Wisdom, has built his house with seven columns.

If you want to learn what authentic masculinity looks like, look to these seven columns: “On the day before he was to suffer, he took bread in his holy and venerable hands, and with eyes raised to heaven to you, O God, his almighty Father, giving you thanks, he said the blessing, broke the bread, and gave it to his disciples, saying.” Take. Raised eyes. Thanksgiving. Bless. Break. Give. Say. These are the traits of authentic masculinity.

The first take refers to recognizing who we are now—with all our gifts, talents, and even shortcomings and sins—and making the effort to be better Christian men and women, to be more virtuous men and women. But we have to do this with eyes raised to heaven because we know we can’t succeed in that effort without asking for God’s grace and God’s help. And we receive that grace to persevere first and foremost from the Eucharist, which actually means thanksgiving; so when we give thanks, we’re “eucharisting,” we’re doing a eucharist. And by receiving the holy Eucharist, by coming to holy Mass as we ought, we should be growing in evangelical joy, such that instead of uttering curses, we utter blessings. Because at the end of the day, the greatest blessing we can bestow is the free, generous, and total gift of ourselves, our very lives; just as Christ was broken and will be broken in the Eucharist to give that gift to us, so too are we called to experience some hardship, some breaking to train us in our level of generosity. And it’s at that point, and only at that point, can we dare to utter the words of Christ to others: “Take and eat; this is my body, given for you.” Take. Raise. Give thanks. Bless. Break. Say.

Because St. John Neumann used to be run by the Augustinians, I used to hear them say all the time, “As St. Augustine said, ‘Be what you see, and receive who you are.’” In other words, when we receive the most holy Eucharist worthily, we become what we receive: We become eucharistic people; we become the Body of Christ, broken in love for others. Authentic masculinity is encapsulated in that tiny host.

Brothers and sisters, that’s the Gospel, that’s the good news we’re called to share this week. Do we have the faith to believe these things about something that looks like bread and tastes like bread? Do we have the hope to believe that everything we need to be the best sons and daughters that God is calling us to can be found in that wafer? And do we have the love not only to love and adore that wafer, but to invite and bring people to this banquet that the Divine Wisdom has prepared for all of us? Because if we really believe in these words, if we really hope in those promises, and if we really love the people in our lives, we’d bring them here, not just sit at the doors of this church hoping they just show up.

Let’s therefore today ask for that grace to be authentic men and women, to be apostolic men and women, to be eucharistic men and women.