Ephesians 5:25-33 (2)

Ephesians 5:25–27 “25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.”

Ephesians 5:28–33 “28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. 33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.”

Intro:

Pigs in animal farm that used authority for selfish gain

Last week we highlighted the importance of the family and highlighted the important mechanism of submission for a healthy and happy family. With this in mind we saw the blessed role of the wife to submit.

And moving to husbands you might think to see “Husbands have authority”

But now we see, that with the wive’s role to submit, the husband does not then have a role of selfish fulfillment.

It is not as if God has determined to give authority to men so that they can use it in a selfish and self serving manner

Instead, with this authority he then serves his wife.

And in this way is the text that began this section fulfilled:

Ephesians 5:21 “21 submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.”

This service the husband is to give to his wife is understood as love.

And our reverence of Jesus is what causes us to understand what love is

And what Jesus teaches and shows us about love is:

Love’s attitude is affection for your wife

Love’s action is what’s best for your wife

And the coming together of these things results in being used as a means for your wife’s sanctification

Ephesians 5:25 “25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,”

Love is perhaps the most famous word in the English language that people will hear and assume they know it but cannot define it or describe it at its essence.

It can be ill-defined and simply understood as I know it when I see it (Justice Potter Stewart in Jacobellis v. Ohio for a proper test of obscenity).

With it so loosely defined, in our society it can be understood as simply a positive feeling we have for another

Especially in the realm of husband and wife, love can be understood as the feeling you get when you first start dating or courting someone.

And if that feeling diminishes too much, one can conclude that they have fallen out of love.

The reaction against this that I have heard from the church is that love is not a feeling, but an action!

Love is what you do for others, not so much how you feel for others.

The fact is, while it is good to react against a love that is understood by feelings alone

It is not good to fall into the other ditch that says love is not a feeling at all

Instead of having an ill-defined understanding of love we should take our understanding from Christ

Ephesians 5:25 “25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,”

Love as understood from Christ is both an affection and an action for the person’s good that we are to love

Love as an affection in Christ and God:

Romans 5:8 “8 but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”

Ephesians 1:4–5 “...In love 5 he predestined us for adoption to himself as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will,”

Ephesians 2:4–5 “4 But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, 5 even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved—”

John 15:13 “13 Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.”

From the affection of love that is God, he then moves to act in love.

Ephesians 5:25 “25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,”

The action of Jesus motivated by love for his bride is to sacrifice himself for the benefit of the church.

This good is delineated in the following 2 verses and it describes what Jesus’ sacrifice for his bride accomplished

26 describes what Jesus has done for his bride in this life now

27 describe what he is to do at the end of the age

Ephesians 5:26 “26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word,”

Sanctify her

Separate the bride for himself.

The bride of Christ at one point was in the world following Satan and was a child of wrath

Ephesians 2:1–3 “1 And you were dead in the trespasses and sins 2 in which you once walked, following the course of this world, following the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that is now at work in the sons of disobedience— 3 among whom we all once lived in the passions of our flesh, carrying out the desires of the body and the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, like the rest of mankind.”

There is no worst condition for someone than to be in this realm of darkness here.

Jesus, in love for his chosen bride, gave up himself as a sacrificial offering to separate his bride from the kingdom of darkness.

Since the workings of the kingdom of darkness is sin, the act of Jesus separating his bride from it is to cleanse her from this sin:

Ephesians 5:26 “26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word,”

Jesus giving up himself as a sacrifice on the cross was the power behind the cleansing of his bride, to rid her of sin and separate her from the corruption of the sinful system.

And then Paul details how its done in this life:

Ephesians 5:26 “26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word,”

Some people think this cleansing that comes with the washing of water is baptism. But it is better to look at what baptism represents:

Water is a fitting physical sign as it not only represents death and resurrection but also thorough cleansing from the defilement of sin.

And such cleansing is not a physical act but a spiritual one that the Holy Spirit does to the chosen bride of Christ.

1 Corinthians 6:9–11 “9 Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, 10 nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. 11 And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.”

In the name of Jesus is by his sacrificial love, by the Spirit being who he sends to apply his work that separates and washes the sin away

But it is important to note this work of the Spirit does not operate in a vacuum…just randomly without any physical signs

Ephesians 5:26 “26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word,”

The word here is the word of God, or the gospel of Christ.

1 Corinthians 2:12–16 “12 Now we have received not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, that we might understand the things freely given us by God. 13 And we impart this in words not taught by human wisdom but taught by the Spirit, interpreting spiritual truths to those who are spiritual. 14 The natural person does not accept the things of the Spirit of God, for they are folly to him, and he is not able to understand them because they are spiritually discerned. 15 The spiritual person judges all things, but is himself to be judged by no one. 16 “For who has understood the mind of the Lord so as to instruct him?” But we have the mind of Christ.”

John 17:17 “17 Sanctify them in the truth; your word is truth.”

Jesus reveals his love for his bride by sacrificing himself for her which is the power behind the sanctifying work of the Spirit cleansing the bride of her sins and it is accomplished through the receiving of the word.

And there is yet a greater good that Jesus has his eyes on as this work is being done now:

Ephesians 5:27 “27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.”

Paul zooms to the end of the age and Jesus has returned to judge the wicked and throw them in hell, but for his beloved bride, the best is waiting for her as she is presented to him by him dressed in splendor or glory

A great imagery is when you are at a wedding and the bride is presented to the groom as the guests stand up in awe of the brides beauty—glory.

This glory the bride of Christ will be in is described by Paul as:

Ephesians 5:27 “27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.”

Without: spot, wrinkle, blemish

She might be holy

Holy is similar to sanctify in which the person is set apart and what sets them apart is their moral purity.

It is important to see, such a dress is just as foreign to the bride, as Cinderella’s attire was to her when she went to the ball.

This is a dress, glorious and in splendor given to the bride by the husband that is receiving her:

Ephesians 5:27 “27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.”

Revelation 19:6–9 “6 Then I heard what seemed to be the voice of a great multitude, like the roar of many waters and like the sound of mighty peals of thunder, crying out, “Hallelujah! For the Lord our God the Almighty reigns. 7 Let us rejoice and exult and give him the glory, for the marriage of the Lamb has come, and his Bride has made herself ready; 8 it was granted her to clothe herself with fine linen, bright and pure”— for the fine linen is the righteous deeds of the saints. 9 And the angel said to me, “Write this: Blessed are those who are invited to the marriage supper of the Lamb.” And he said to me, “These are the true words of God.””

And interestingly the glory and splendor of the dress of Christ over the bride causes John to be dizzy in vision and mind in which he does a silly thing like:

Revelation 19:10 “10 Then I fell down at his feet to worship him, but he said to me, “You must not do that! I am a fellow servant with you and your brothers who hold to the testimony of Jesus. Worship God.” For the testimony of Jesus is the spirit of prophecy.”

And so important it is to note that this is a dress provided by the husband that Jesus has this warning for those who think they can look glorious without it:

Matthew 22:11–14 “11 “But when the king came in to look at the guests, he saw there a man who had no wedding garment. 12 And he said to him, ‘Friend, how did you get in here without a wedding garment?’ And he was speechless. 13 Then the king said to the attendants, ‘Bind him hand and foot and cast him into the outer darkness. In that place there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.’ 14 For many are called, but few are chosen.””

1 Peter 1:19 “19 but with the precious blood of Christ, like that of a lamb without blemish or spot.”

Hebrews 7:26 “26 For it was indeed fitting that we should have such a high priest, holy, innocent, unstained, separated from sinners, and exalted above the heavens.”

What is the love that Jesus displayed?

An affection on an unworthy, dirty, and ugly group of people

In which he takes her, and makes her beautiful by his sacrifice applied by the Spirit that sets her apart in holiness.

So that as his work presents his bride to himself, the whole room wows at the beauty of Christ the bride is wearing.

The affection of Jesus began on a sinful people, but it is completed on a people he revealed that affection to that made them pure and beautiful.

His love in action provided for our greatest need.

Ephesians 5:28 “28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.”

Husbands have a deep affection for your wife:

Proverbs 5:18–19 “18 Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth, 19 a lovely deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight; be intoxicated always in her love.”

Let this affection bring you to action for the betterment of your wife

Affection and Action go well together and it is a good that God gives us that acting in love would feel good.

But in our corrupted state, sometimes affection is not there, and yet we are called to still act.

This can happen for a time but much prayer needs to be had that affection would return, for it can only last so long.

Like a plan with its engines gone that can coast for a time.

Love is a feeling of affection that fuels the action of good for another.

Love is not just action: love is not just feeling: love is both.

God in his goodness has made doing good for others feel good to us with the feeling of affection.

Because of the fallen state, sometimes we don’t feel love, yet we should still act in love. But as God has made it, love is both action fueled by feeling.

Lie of Satan: Love is simple feeling

Lie of reactionary church: Love is only action

Truth: Our Good God has made loving others to feel good. Thus, the good feeling love gives us should be used and directed not for self but for service to the object of our affection.

Thus, that very good feeling that we get when the affection of love is growing at the first for someone is a good thing and to be celebrated. But it needs to be focused on a deep rooted action oriented love that is to serve that person.

As that happens, love develops and matures and turns into something even more beautiful.

But if the initial feeling of love does not get devoted to the action of service of love then it becomes stunted and dies—which people call falling out of love.

So the imperative from Paul here:

Ephesians 5:25 “25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,”

Husbands he is telling you to have both affection for your wife—and he is telling you to serve your wife from those affections.

How do I know?

Because he provides a perfect example in Christ for his church

Ephesians 5:25 “25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,”

Love of affection:

Song of Solomon 4:9–10 “9 You have captivated my heart, my sister, my bride; you have captivated my heart with one glance of your eyes, with one jewel of your necklace. 10 How beautiful is your love, my sister, my bride! How much better is your love than wine, and the fragrance of your oils than any spice!”

Song of Solomon 5:1 “1 I came to my garden, my sister, my bride, I gathered my myrrh with my spice, I ate my honeycomb with my honey, I drank my wine with my milk. Eat, friends, drink, and be drunk with love!”

And so we are to have an affection for our wives

Proverbs 5:18–19 “18 Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth, 19 a lovely deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight; be intoxicated always in her love.”

And this affection is meant to propel and make our acts of love enjoyable to our souls

Ephesians 5:25 “25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,”

Thus love is an affection that fuels action.

It does not mean when the affection is gone because of sin we no longer can have action

We still strive to act in love but we do it with prayer that affection will return

Like a plane whose engines go out, you can still fly for a bit, but you pray that the engines turn back on

The submission of the wife is followed by the service of the husband in his leadership role

This service to the wife is called love

Love is defined within the bounds of Christ’s service for his church

Gave himself for her

so that he would sanctify (separate for holy use) her (first reason for his death is this present age)

Sanctify her looks like a cleansing by the washing of water with the word

So that she would be presented to him in splendor

Splendor (the second reason for his death is rooted in the end of the age: Revelation 19:6-9 for a good image of it

Negative: without spot or wrinkle or any such thing

Positive: holy and without blemish

Ephesians 5:25 “25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,”

love is perfect always in Christ. However our love grows overtime. The feelings at the first are not the fully bodied love that builds overtime.

Wives—husbands

Child—parents

Slave—Master

The former is told to submit, the latter is told to revere Christ and submit to him as they serve the former

25-33 Two illustrations used:

1.25-27 Christ’s love for his bride

2. 28-33 Christ’s care for his own body

Use the analogy of as Eve came forth from Adam’s body so the Church comes forth from Jesus

Ephesians 5:28 “28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.”

Hodge: It does not indicate the measure off the husbands love, as though the meaning were, he should love his wife as much as he loves his own body. but it indicates the nature of the relation which is the ground of his love. He should love his wife, because she is his body.