09d) A Leader's Heart - What He Must Not Be
Notes
Transcript
Introduction
Introduction
We will be continuing in chapter 3 of Paul’s letter to is son in the faith Timothy. The man that Paul had left to oversee the church in Ephesus. Paul had warned many years earlier that wolves would appear from among the flock. They were to be on guard for these people to arrive.
Paul’s letter reveals that he has heard that the wolves have come and that there is now issues in the church that must be addressed. There are false doctrines and ideas being taught, there are people wanting to be teachers that don’t know what they are teaching, the worship gathering of the church is filled with people full of dissension and others dressing up in overly expensive and showy ways to draw attention to themselves, to worship their lives instead of gathering to worship God.
The church has moved from honoring God to honoring man. And what happens when a group of people wants only what they want, when my desires, my wants are the most important. There is disunity, trouble and chaos. The conduct of the church is far from honoring to God.
Timothy is charged with righting the ship, to make a correction.
15 But if I should be delayed, I have written so that you will know how people ought to conduct themselves in God’s household, which is the church of the living God, the pillar and foundation of the truth.
The church of God, payed for by the sacrifice of Jesus, his bride, the body of Christ. The church the household of God and the pillar and foundation of the truth.
There is no other entity on the planet in times past present of future that can claim to be the foundation of truth. It is only the church that God has established.
The leaders of the church have a noble task to lead this church of God. To be examples of faith, to be shepherds of the flock, to be overseers of the body, to be elders that protect the truth, teachers to present the truth, to be watchmen over the souls of the people. to be doers of the the noble work.
1 This saying is trustworthy: “If anyone aspires to be an overseer, he desires a noble work.”
In the next sentence Paul gives Timothy 12 characterizations of an overseer of God’s church. These are the qualities and characteristics that should be exhibited in the church leader.
2 An overseer, therefore, must be above reproach, the husband of one wife, self-controlled, sensible, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, 3 not an excessive drinker, not a bully but gentle, not quarrelsome, not greedy.
We have looked at eight of them so far:
He must be above reproach. Charges of immorality cannot be held to him.
He must be the husband of one woman, a one woman man, faithful and loyal to his wife or future wife if he is single.
He must be a sensible and self controlled man, sober-minded, alert and focused on the task that has been set before him. A man who is not lead by emotions and knee jerk reactions.
He must be respectable, an man who has his life put into an orderly manner. A man who’s life as a church leader can merge into his home life.
He must be hospitable and generous in his heart towards other believers including opening their home to those that may need a place to stay.
He must be able to teach. A person that has been gifted with the ability to pass on knowledge and skills in a way that benefits the growth of those that is being taught.
This points to the positive traits and and characteristics that a man must have to lead the church in a way that honors God. This what he must be to lead. He needs to have these to effectively shepherd God’s sheep. They must be there for their benefit.
Just like any job application what is the first thing that is looked at on the resume, it is the skills and characteristics, and experience that must be there to do the job. Those must be there first, I could never get a job as a music teacher.
But One of the questions the we started asking in our interviews was “Is there anything that we should know about that would hinder you from doing well in this position?”
The question really made people think because we only like to promote our positive attributes. We do not like to highlight our weaknesses or areas that we struggle in. It doesn’t matter how skilled a person is in a discipline, there are characteristics and attributes that hinder and undermine the ability to be effective at the tasks set before them.
Paul has given the positive characteristics and now he comes to the what he must not be. He outlines four things that will derail and prevent a man from being able to fulfill the responsibilities of an overseer and shepherd.
He must...
3 not an excessive drinker, not a bully but gentle, not quarrelsome, not greedy.
Not an Excessive Drinker
Not an Excessive Drinker
The bible is replete with references to drunkenness and drinking alcohol in the scriptures. It is a topic that pops up in the beginning of the word and continues throughout. It is a topic that to this day has many different opinions and disagreements on.
A study by NIAAA in 2023 showed that 51.6% of people 18 and older drank alcohol in the last month and 23.5%, a quarter of people 18 and older consume what is defined as binge drinking. That is drinking 4 to 5 drinks in a short period of time at least once a month.
An industry that is worth 260 billion dollars. this is a big industry. is nearly as big as the fast food industry definitely has an impact on our lives and the lives of the people around us.
It is a staple in our society. It is portrayed as a right of passage, used for celebration, or for dealing with grief, for relieving stress, present in social gatherings, paired with food.
If alcohol is such a integral part of our society why must a church leader not be and excessive drinker or a drunkard.
We tend to think of youth and collage as being the group that is the most effected by alcohol and we know that it can be abused and create all sorts of problems but the CDC recently estimated that in a two year window that 3/4 of the alcohol poisoning deaths were aged 35 to 64.
Early in the bible we see it cause issues in the families of Noah and Lot.
King David used it to try to cover his sin against Uriah’s wife.
It is spoken of in the wisdom of the proverbs
29 Who has woe? Who has sorrow? Who has conflicts? Who has complaints? Who has wounds for no reason? Who has red eyes? 30 Those who linger over wine; those who go looking for mixed wine. 31 Don’t gaze at wine because it is red, because it gleams in the cup and goes down smoothly. 32 In the end it bites like a snake and stings like a viper. 33 Your eyes will see strange things, and you will say absurd things. 34 You’ll be like someone sleeping out at sea or lying down on the top of a ship’s mast. 35 “They struck me, but I feel no pain! They beat me, but I didn’t know it! When will I wake up? I’ll look for another drink.”
It was abused by the priests
7 Even these stagger because of wine and stumble under the influence of beer: Priest and prophet stagger because of beer. They are confused by wine. They stumble because of beer. They are muddled in their visions. They stumble in their judgments.
Paul tells the Romans to discard the deeds of darkness
12 The night is nearly over, and the day is near; so let us discard the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light. 13 Let us walk with decency, as in the daytime: not in carousing and drunkenness; not in sexual impurity and promiscuity; not in quarreling and jealousy. 14 But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh to gratify its desires.
He tells the Corinthians to not associate with those that claim to be a christian and behave this way.
11 But actually, I wrote you not to associate with anyone who claims to be a brother or sister and is sexually immoral or greedy, an idolater or verbally abusive, a drunkard or a swindler. Do not even eat with such a person.
And that those who behave this way will not inherit the kingdom of God.
9 Don’t you know that the unrighteous will not inherit God’s kingdom? Do not be deceived: No sexually immoral people, idolaters, adulterers, or males who have sex with males, 10 no thieves, greedy people, drunkards, verbally abusive people, or swindlers will inherit God’s kingdom.
He calls it a work of the flesh
19 Now the works of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, moral impurity, promiscuity, 20 idolatry, sorcery, hatreds, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambitions, dissensions, factions, 21 envy, drunkenness, carousing, and anything similar. I am warning you about these things—as I warned you before—that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.
Peter tells the Church to stop behaving like the Gentile
1 Peter 4:3 (CSB)
3 For there has already been enough time spent in doing what the Gentiles choose to do: carrying on in unrestrained behavior, evil desires, drunkenness, ...
Paul tells the Ephesians to refrain from being drunk on wine.
18 And don’t get drunk with wine, which leads to reckless living, but be filled by the Spirit: 19 speaking to one another in psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs, singing and making music with your heart to the Lord, 20 giving thanks always for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ,
The bible does not prohibit drinking of alcohol and it is even appropriate at times to consume it.
26 You may spend the silver on anything you want: cattle, sheep, goats, wine, beer, or anything you desire. You are to feast there in the presence of the Lord your God and rejoice with your family.
6 Give beer to one who is dying and wine to one whose life is bitter.
Though there are times that it was appropriate to consume alcohol for specific reasons at specific times and never to lead to drunkenness, the following proverb is a great summary.
1 Wine is a mocker, beer is a brawler; whoever goes astray because of them is not wise.
The few verses that speak of the appropriate times to drink are far overshadowed by the multitude of scriptures that show the sin that occurs and the pain the comes from those that go astray because of wine and beer. The absence of drinking was also a noble thing in bible times as shown by the Nazirite Vow. People who vowed to be set apart for God.
1 The Lord instructed Moses, 2 “Speak to the Israelites and tell them: When a man or woman makes a special vow, a Nazirite vow, to consecrate himself to the Lord, 3 he is to abstain from wine and beer. He must not drink vinegar made from wine or from beer. He must not drink any grape juice or eat fresh grapes or raisins. 4 He is not to eat anything produced by the grapevine, from seeds to skin, during the period of his consecration.
We must also understand that what we call beer and wine is much different that what carries the same name in the bible. Wine was a staple drink in almost all homes and was diluted with water in ratios of any where from 3 to 8 to one. It wasn’t common to drink wine with the percentages of alcohol as we see in today’s industry.
One of the main reasons for this was that the water was very unclean. Without sanitation systems like we have today that take the bad out and the clean in, it was common for water supplies to be contaminates by human or animal waste. Therefore at times it was necessary to use the alcohol content in wine to kill the bacteria found in the water supply.
Due to the strong teaching against drunkeness and the view of drinking as a form of impurity, we even see Timothy being encouraged to drink some wine to help with his constant stomach issues.
22 Don’t be too quick to appoint anyone as an elder, and don’t share in the sins of others. Keep yourself pure. 23 Don’t continue drinking only water, but use a little wine because of your stomach and your frequent illnesses.
Paul is not advocating for him to grab a bottle and start chugging. Timothy was trying so hard to be an example that he was causing himself to be ill.
Drinking and drunkeness has effected people and communities since the beginning of recorded history. But Paul says it has no place in the leaders of the church. Why? There are many but there are two the seem to rise to the top.
The first is that it has continually been shown to be an issue for leaders of the church.
9 All you animals of the field and forest, come and eat! 10 Israel’s watchmen are blind, all of them, they know nothing; all of them are mute dogs, they cannot bark; they dream, lie down, and love to sleep. 11 These dogs have fierce appetites; they never have enough. And they are shepherds who have no discernment; all of them turn to their own way, every last one for his own profit. 12 “Come, let me get some wine, let’s guzzle some beer; and tomorrow will be like today, only far better!”
It effects the mind and thus the ability of the leader to fulfill his responsibilities. It leads men into a stupor without discernment and turns them to their own ways.
Second, church leaders are to be examples to the flock and those that may be tempted to fall into drunkenness should not be lead there by the example of their leaders. There are many things that are permissible for leaders but they cause a hindrance for others when they are lived out in their lives.
Many churches require their Pastors and elders to abstain from all forms of alcohol.
A leader must not only not be a drunkard as that would disqualify him, but he must also not be a lover of wine, he must not be constantly frequenting and participating in activities and places that consume alcohol.
In the end, I simple ask the question is all of the risk, all of the warnings, all of the temptations, worth it. I have seen first hand the power that alcohol has on a parent. The struggle and choices that hurt the ones they love and care for. The conflict in the home and that lasting consequences. Hoping that our loved ones get better. I have spent a spring break as a kid at an alcohol treatment center for family counseling.
I just cannot come to find a beneficial reason today to risk being lead astray by the effects of alcohol. A leader must not be one who is a lover of wine. How is he to be a shepherd to the sheep if he is addicted to a substance that dulls his mind and can easily lead him into sin.
Not a Bully but Gentle
Not a Bully but Gentle
3 not an excessive drinker, not a bully but gentle, not quarrelsome, not greedy.
A leader must not be a bully or violent. The Greek word means pugnacious or a striker or a giver of blows. They must not be men that use their strength and size to force people to follow them. They are not to be men who use physical violence or the threat of physical violence to get their way or make their point.
24 The Lord’s servant must not quarrel, but must be gentle to everyone, able to teach, and patient, 25 instructing his opponents with gentleness. Perhaps God will grant them repentance leading them to the knowledge of the truth.
Gentle, moderate, patient with those that are under their care. Always focused on each person in their care to move forward from where they are at and not focused on the evil that may have transpired in the past.
This issue may be less obvious in today’s world as there has been a focus on violence and abuse in the past decades but we still hear and see stories and testimonies of Pastors who have treated their people in this way.
A person who uses physical violence or the threat of violence has no place in leading the church of God. The mind is consumed with controlling the flock instead of watching over it. They are willing to hurt the sheep in order to get their way.
This is a distortion of the church as Christ is the head of the church and not the pastor. He is the one who leads and the Pastor helps to that end.
Not Quarrelsome
Not Quarrelsome
3 not an excessive drinker, not a bully but gentle, not quarrelsome, not greedy.
He is also to be not quarrelsome or unhostile. Not only do they not use their strength or size to win disagreements, here they are actually inclined and dispositioned to peace.
Their first inclination is a peacemaker. In the Greek it means he is peace able. When there is a conflict in the school yard, this is the kid who’s first instinct is to make peace to remove the hostility.
Why must an overseer be a peace maker?
14 Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. 15 Rejoice with those who rejoice; weep with those who weep. 16 Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud; instead, associate with the humble. Do not be wise in your own estimation. 17 Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Give careful thought to do what is honorable in everyone’s eyes. 18 If possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. 19 Friends, do not avenge yourselves; instead, leave room for God’s wrath, because it is written, Vengeance belongs to me; I will repay, says the Lord. 20 But If your enemy is hungry, feed him. If he is thirsty, give him something to drink. For in so doing you will be heaping fiery coals on his head. 21 Do not be conquered by evil, but conquer evil with good.
All Christians are to strive to be at peace with one another. Each and every sheep has an opinion. Who here has an opinion? Who here has more than one opinion of things? As a pastor this is probably the part that consumes my mind the most. How do I take each and every opinion and want and desire that gets presented, many times that are in opposition of other people in the church, and then come to a conclusion on how to lead.
There are very few opinions at least in my experience that are blatantly against God’s will for his people. These are usually easier to confront head on with the word. But what about all of the other preferences that are not against his word but must be navigated as a community of believers.
Some want to do this, other want to do that. Some one wants this to change another doesn’t want anything to change. None of them are wrong answers but in the end any decisions a leader makes has the likely hood to make someone unhappy. That is just the nature of group dynamics.
A leader must not be naturally inclined to choose sides or to quarrel. To inflame the tension that comes from disagreement. They must be known to be a person that is
19 My dear brothers and sisters, understand this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger, 20 for human anger does not accomplish God’s righteousness.
If the leader is running around creating his own conflicts how is going to be able to navigate through the different issues that arise in the church. They must not be inclined to join a side. but must be willing to take all of the information and sit before God to point people in the right direction.
A contention and quarrelsome Pastor will do nothing but create chaos where ever they go. The pastor is to not lead people into conflict with each other and taking their focus off of Christ but pointing people to reconciliation and brotherly love by pointing them to Christ. Reminding them of the gospel and the work of the cross and the spirit in their lives.
A man who pits himself against the sheep, will also pit the sheep against the sheep and is not fit to be an overseer of God’s church.
Not Greedy
Not Greedy
And finally he must not be greedy or a lover of money. Not covetous. Greed was something that Paul strived to never be charged with.
5 For we never used flattering speech, as you know, or had greedy motives—God is our witness—
It was something that should never be a motive for a church leader.
2 Shepherd God’s flock among you, not overseeing out of compulsion but willingly, as God would have you; not out of greed for money but eagerly; 3 not lording it over those entrusted to you, but being examples to the flock.
There will be those that will use the church for their own selfish gain. It is a common theme among false teachers.
1 There were indeed false prophets among the people, just as there will be false teachers among you. They will bring in destructive heresies, even denying the Master who bought them, and will bring swift destruction on themselves. 2 Many will follow their depraved ways, and the way of truth will be maligned because of them. 3 They will exploit you in their greed with made-up stories. Their condemnation, pronounced long ago, is not idle, and their destruction does not sleep.
Paul will instruct Timothy later of the true heart of a leader in regards to money. And that is to be content with what has been provided.
6 But godliness with contentment is great gain. 7 For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out. 8 If we have food and clothing, we will be content with these. 9 But those who want to be rich fall into temptation, a trap, and many foolish and harmful desires, which plunge people into ruin and destruction. 10 For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil, and by craving it, some have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs.
Not only for leaders but also for all believers.
5 Keep your life free from the love of money. Be satisfied with what you have, for he himself has said, I will never leave you or abandon you.
Greed and the pursuit of money has lead many a pastor astray. Has lead to men making decisions that benefit themselves. They make moral compromises. I have seen stories in the news that have their church buy the first copies of his book to hand out so that his book will be on the top seller list. There are continual accusations of greed and mismanagement of money in churches.
A man that is motivated by money does not have his heart in the right place to be a shepherd of the flock. He is to make sure the flock is grown not his own pocketbook.
We will looking into this further when we get to chapter 5 when we will look at the honor of elders
17 The elders who are good leaders are to be considered worthy of double honor, especially those who work hard at preaching and teaching.
We will see that the elders that are good leaders, those that rule well, are to be considered of double honor. There are to be multiple elder who will perform the work in different ways and at different levels of effort. What I want to point out today is just that any financial component given to a Pastor should be based on the consideration of the church and the basis of their work.
Money should not be an issue in between the leaders of God’s church and the church itself. The leader is to be content with what God has provided both through the church and also through tentmaking and work outside the church. And the church should willingly want to provide for their elders because of the work they do as they shepherd the flock.
One of my favorite things to do is premarital counseling. I am not sure if it is a favorite for the couple but I enjoy pointing people to God’s will for their marriage and since God’s will is very different than our culture. I find it can be challenging and exciting for couples to gain the hope of a marriage that follows God.
Towards the end of our meetings there is a discussion on finances and one of the parts of the conversation is that if you find your marriage having constant friction about money, then there usually is something else going on underneath the surface. There is something else that has crept into the home.
One couple this year equated it to the canary in a mine that was used for warning people if a dangerous gas had been released and people needed to take heed. Money does that in the home and I think in church as well.
If a church and its leaders are having conflict about money something else is going on. Either the elder or the church is not following God.
I believe church leader should be well informed of the finances of the church and should lead the church to utilize what God has given them to steward and to use for the work of the kingdom. But they really shouldn’t have direct control or access to the finances itself.
1 I exhort the elders among you as a fellow elder and witness to the sufferings of Christ, as well as one who shares in the glory about to be revealed: 2 Shepherd God’s flock among you, not overseeing out of compulsion but willingly, as God would have you; not out of greed for money but eagerly; 3 not lording it over those entrusted to you, but being examples to the flock.
The elders are to willingly serve not out of compulsion. Not out of greed but eagerly. There is to be only one Lord in the church and the is our Lord Jesus Christ.
The leader is not to be a lover of money or he is not a man that God has declared qualified to lead his church.
Conclusion
Conclusion
We have covered the 12 characteristics that Paul starts his instruction on church overseers. Today we have looked the negative things that he must not be in order to effectively lead God’s church. What we find in these characteristics are the qualities of men that reveal sin in the heart of the man.
Lover of wine: A man motivated by pleasure is not fit for the task
Bully: A man motivated by power is not fit for the task
A quarrelsome man: A man who is motivated by pride is not fit for the task
A Lover of money: A man who is motivated by greed is not fit for the task.
These are not and were not the motivations of our Lord.
He pursued nothing for his own pleasure but denied all that would turn him from the work that God had given him. He has all the power in the universe. He could have called down a host of angels and ended all opposition but he willingly and gently interacted with friend and foe alike.
He won many discussions and disagreements with the religious leaders but he not it in a quarrelsome way.
He was not one who sought out the wealth of this world. He was content with what God had provided for him.
No man is perfect and that is not what Paul is saying here. We are not looking for one strike and you are out type of events. These are men’s motivations. The heart that drives their reason for leading and for being there.
The motivations of the world are these:
16 For everything in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride in one’s possessions—is not from the Father, but is from the world.
And they produce the works of the flesh
19 Now the works of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, moral impurity, promiscuity, 20 idolatry, sorcery, hatreds, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambitions, dissensions, factions, 21 envy, drunkenness, carousing, and anything similar. I am warning you about these things—as I warned you before—that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.
But the lusts of the world are temporary
17 And the world with its lust is passing away, but the one who does the will of God remains forever.
and the work of the spirit is
22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, and self-control. The law is not against such things.
It is by the grace of God that anyone is changed as a new creation. It is by the work of the spirit that men are appointed to the task as leaders. It is by his providence that his church will continue to be built and he will continue to raise up men to be shepherds of his people.
The men who lead the church are not those who have trained, excelled, and earned the position.
They are the men who have humbled themselves before the Lord, have been gifted by the Lord, and are burdened with the desire to serve the Lord in this noble work.
Let us pray.
Let us pray.
Prayer
Communion
Warning
Children, Lost, Sin
19 And he took bread, gave thanks, broke it, gave it to them, and said, “This is my body, which is given for you. Do this in remembrance of me.” 20 In the same way he also took the cup after supper and said, “This cup is the new covenant in my blood, which is poured out for you.
27 Then he took a cup, and after giving thanks, he gave it to them and said, “Drink from it, all of you. 28 For this is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of sins.
Prayer
Song
Closing
Blessing/Benediction
5 Now may the God who gives endurance and encouragement grant you to live in harmony with one another, according to Christ Jesus, 6 so that you may glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ with one mind and one voice.
