Becoming a Hospitable Person

She Is Conference - October 4/5

Introduction:

Welcome to our brand new series, that I am really excited about: Tables - Reclaiming Hospitality.

This is a three part series that will affirm, guide, and challenge all of us towards gospel-centered hospitality.

It is the goal of today to set the table for understanding the theology and importance of hospitality. We will be looking at an Old Testament example found in Abraham.

If you recall, hospitality is one of our practices that we will learn and grow in as apprentices of Jesus. These practices serve as a way of life in Jesus.

I am reminding you of these spiritual practices for a reason. The reason we pay attention to practices is to become more like Jesus. Discipleship is not just a ‘yes or no’ question; it is a ‘how much’ question. Discipleship is always something we grow in and are being transformed into, overtime. And that is the whole point of spiritual practices.

Hospitality is corporate habit—meaning, it requires other people in order to be done. Other practices like sabbath and solitude, are inward individual applications of those habits. Hospitality by its very nature is an outward expression.

It requires other people to be the recipients of that hospitality.

But as we will see,

hospitality is much more than simply being nice to others;

it is more than just throwing a dinner party;

it is more than serving the needs of someone else.

‌‌Hospitality is a spiritual practice that helps make us become deeply rooted as apprentices of Jesus…creating a space for people to connect with you as you represent the heart of your Father in Heaven.

Let’s Pray

My personal story of hospitality

- Monday night dinners

- Uncomfortable

- Eight key conversations with unchurch or dechurched people

I believe that hospitality is the main practice that allows for people to explore spirituality and see who Jesus looks like by interacting with you.

Let’s look at this story of hospitality that comes from the Old Testament in Genesis.

Genesis 18:1–8 (NIV)

The Lord appeared to Abraham near the great trees of Mamre while he was sitting at the entrance to his tent in the heat of the day. Abraham looked up and saw three men standing nearby. When he saw them, he hurried from the entrance of his tent to meet them and bowed low to the ground.

He said, “If I have found favor in your eyes, my lord, do not pass your servant by. Let a little water be brought, and then you may all wash your feet and rest under this tree. Let me get you something to eat, so you can be refreshed and then go on your way—now that you have come to your servant.”

“Very well,” they answered, “do as you say.”

So Abraham hurried into the tent to Sarah. “Quick,” he said, “get three seahs of the finest flour and knead it and bake some bread.”

Then he ran to the herd and selected a choice, tender calf and gave it to a servant, who hurried to prepare it. He then brought some curds and milk and the calf that had been prepared, and set these before them. While they ate, he stood near them under a tree.

What can we learn about the faith practice of hospitality from Abraham here in Genesis?

First, Abraham was looking.

The passage starts out be telling us that it was Abraham who looked out and saw the three visitors.

There is no indication from the story that these three foreigners called out or were in other ways trying to get Abraham’s attention.

It was Abraham who took time to look around him and notice these visitors nearby.

Two, Abraham went to them.

He did not sit and wait for the visitors to approach him. The way the Bible tells it, Abraham hurried to approach them.

It was priority and it was immediate.

Abraham did not put it off until he finished scrolling through his instagram feed, or writing an email, or whatever he happened to be doing at the moment.

He stopped whatever he was doing at that moment and immediately turned his full attention on these visitors.

Three, Abraham offered an invitation.

It an intentional and well thought-out invitation.

Abraham assessed what the need was in that moment, and he offered what he could to meet that need.

He observed that these men were travelers and were perhaps weary and dirty from their walking.

So, he offers water for washing and a meal for nourishment.

Four, Abraham gives his very best.

He instructs his wife to use the finest flour for baking bread.

He goes himself to the herd to select the very best calf.

And in each instance, it is done immediately.

Abraham does not hesitate for one moment to give his very best to serve the needs of these strangers.

Five, Abraham stays present.

Part of Abraham’s hospitality is his immediate presence. He stays right there with these visitors while they are being refreshed along their journey.

Don’t miss this one, it is the most important parts of hospitality.

Abraham did not just provide for the need that he saw.

If that is all Abraham does, then it would be an act of generosity, not an act of hospitality.

But Abraham’s commitment to remaining present with these men sets it apart as an act of hospitality.

Practice application:

The exact specifics of what hospitality looks like has changed in many ways, in the thousands of years that have passed since the time of Abraham.

But these five principles of hospitality are still exactly the same.

Now, we are going to spend a few moments thinking about how hospitality can show up in your own spiritual practice this week or how you can make it a regular spiritual rhythm.

One, be looking.

It takes a conscious choice to stop being hyper focused on just my own agenda.

We need to be looking around and be aware of who it is around us, that needs to be shown hospitality.

The key ingredient here is to step outside of your usual social circles.

I cannot emphasize that enough. It’s easy to be hospitable to the friends and family you already have.

The key point of hospitality as a spiritual practice is to identify someone who is currently on the outside and approach them with the intent on bringing them to the inside. If all our hospitality efforts are spent just on people inside the church, then we are missing the gospel part of hospitality.

We must be willing to step outside our social circles into the world of other people in order for hospitality to really happen. That means intentionally looking outside of our own world.

Two, go to them.

Hospitality does not wait for someone to come asking first.

Hospitality does not wait for others to come to us.

Hospitality is not just an open door willing to let other people come in and join along.

No, hospitality goes to them in the places where they are. Hospitality means taking some steps into somebody else’s world to be there with them. Hospitality says let me come to you.

Who is it that God is placing somewhere on the margins of your places? Who can you approach and go to?

Don’t wait…go.

Three, offer an invitation.

In hospitality we do our very best to put ourselves into the shoes of others and figure out if there might be any needs.

How can I bless someone else in the place where they are by offering and providing something from my own blessings?

Maybe it is just time to be a listening ear. Our world is filled with loneliness and isolation. Often, just showing up as a listening friend is the most and the best we can offer in hospitality.

What is it you have that can be offered to someone in hospitality?

Four, give your best.

Hospitality does not offer the scraps or the leftovers; it gives the very best.

Mac-n-cheese left overs

Hospitality communicates to someone else that you are worthy of my time and worthy of the best I can offer.

What are the blessings you have which can be offered as the best of God’s blessings to someone else?

Meal, coffee, a place to connect, etc.

Five, be present.

We cannot skip this one.

Steps one through four without step five would be a fine example of generosity, but falls short of being hospitality.

Hospitality requires our presence with other people. And there is more to being present than just physical proximity.

It is entirely possible to be physically with other people but not really be present with them. To be present with someone else means I give that person my full and undivided attention.

No cell phone use at the table

Hospitality means being fully present with someone else.

Seam:

What does all of this add up to?

What is it that hospitality does?

What is the goal?

In sum, hospitality creates space in our lives for people on the outside to become connected to people who love Jesus, and intentionally pulls those people in giving them a place to belong.

Hospitality is the act of making space for guests, visitors, or strangers, and extending to them the privilege of family.

It seems in our world we often like to place qualifiers on this statement; maybe without meaning to.

Our world often puts qualifiers such as, if you look like us and act like us, you can be extended the privilege of family. That’s not hospitality. Or if you value what we value and behave by our expectations, you can be extended the privilege of family. That’s not hospitality. Or if you pass the test and show you are good enough, you can be extended the privilege of family. That’s not hospitality.

Jesus was clear about hospitality. Gospel of Luke says…

Luke 14:12–14 NIV

“Then Jesus said to his host, “When you give a luncheon or dinner, do not invite your friends, your brothers or sisters, your relatives, or your rich neighbors; if you do, they may invite you back and so you will be repaid. But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, and you will be blessed. Although they cannot repay you, you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous.”

Young Adults

The only reason you and I are in this place today is because the gospel is a story of hospitality.

God looked and saw his broken creation and chose not to ignore doing anything about our sin. Jesus did not wait for us to come to him. Rather, Jesus is the one who comes to us.

He is the one who enters into our world alongside of us. Jesus offers an invitation to come and follow him. Jesus knows our needs and he comes to us in our moment of need.

Jesus offers his very best. He gives himself completely on the cross for us because he loves each one of us.

There are no conditions to be met or tests to pass in order to receive the grace and forgiveness of God.

God comes and embraces us as his very own just the way we are because now we are covered in the righteousness of Christ given to us at the cross.

And God is present.

The Holy Spirit is given to the church so that the Spirit of God may abide in us and with us. You are never hidden from his sight.

You are never beyond his grasp. As I reflect on a common prayer of blessing found Numbers 6. It is important to note that the Hebrew word pānı̂m which can mean either “face” or “presence.” The image is the kind of presence that is face-to-face. A close and faithful presence of undivided attention. That is how God reveals himself to be present with us. You see, the gospel is a story of hospitality. It is God’s hospitality to you and me. And we, as followers of Jesus, receive this hospitality from God and are raised up in Christ to echo that same hospitality into this world which God loves so much.

Numbers 6:24–26 (NIV)

“The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face shine on you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace.”