Sometimes It's Right and Sometimes It's Wrong to Be Angry!

Anger and Stress Management God’s Way

Introduction

Is it always a sin to be angry? Some people sincerely believe that it’s always a sin to be angry. From childhood, they were taught that it was wrong to express anger in any form.

There are other people who seem to believe that angers is never sinful-unless it’s directed at them.

· Parents will not tolerate their children expressing anger at them or other children, but quickly excuse their own anger toward their children.

· Husband and wives have one standard for themselves and another for theirs spouses.

THESIS STATEMENT: The truth of the matter is that anger is sometimes sinful and sometimes righteous.

Biblical Statements and Examples of Sinful Anger

“Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice:” (Ephesians 4:31)

“But now ye also put off all these; anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy, filthy communication out of your mouth.” (Colossians 3:8)

According to these verses, there is a kind of anger that is sinful and must be excluded from the life of a believer.

Examples of this anger in Scripture are...

· Genesis 4 when Cain became angry with his brother, Abel, and murdered him.

· 1 Samuel 18 when King Saul was angry with David when David did well in battle and was praised by the people. Later, Saul became angry with his son, Jonathan, for being friends with David.

· Mark 6:19 when Herodias had it in for John the Baptist. Later, because of her sinful anger, John the Baptist was beheaded.

· Acts 7:54 when the Jewish leaders were enraged against Stephen and took up stones killing him.

· Acts 23:3 when Paul when before the Sanhedrin and angrily lashed out against them using speech not sanctioned by the Holy Spirit.

Biblical Statement and Examples of Righteous Anger

“Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath:” (Ephesians 4:26, KJV 1900)

It is clear from this verse that there is a kind of anger that is not sinful. These verses (Ephesians 4:31 & 4:26) do not contradict each other; they are simply teaching us how to handle two different kinds of anger – anger that is sinful and anger that is not sinful.

God – who cannot sin – is said to be angry.

“God judgeth the righteous, And God is angry with the wicked every day.” (Psalm 7:11, KJV 1900)

“And the anger of the Lordwas kindled against Moses, and he said, Is not Aaron the Levite thy brother? I know that he can speak well. And also, behold, he cometh forth to meet thee: and when he seeth thee, he will be glad in his heart.” (Exodus 4:14, KJV 1900)

“And the anger of the Lordwas kindled against this land, to bring upon it all the curses that are written in this book: And the Lord rooted them out of their land in anger, and in wrath, and in great indignation, and cast them into another land, as it is this day.” (Deuteronomy 29:27–28, KJV 1900)

God was extremely angry at the Israelites on this occasion and on others.

The gospels of Mark and John describe two situations in which the Lord Jesus, the meek and lowly one, became righteously angry.

“And when he had looked round about on them with anger, being grieved for the hardness of their hearts, he saith unto the man, Stretch forth thine hand. And he stretched it out: and his hand was restored whole as the other.” (Mark 3:5, KJV 1900)

We know that Christ’s anger was sinless – holy and righteous – because 1 John 3:5 says...

“And ye know that he was manifested to take away our sins; and in him is no sin.” (1 John 3:5, KJV 1900)

“And the Jews’ passover was at hand, and Jesus went up to Jerusalem, And found in the temple those that sold oxen and sheep and doves, and the changers of money sitting: And when he had made a scourge of small cords, he drove them all out of the temple, and the sheep, and the oxen; and poured out the changers’ money, and overthrew the tables; And said unto them that sold doves, Take these things hence; make not my Father’s house an house of merchandise. And his disciples remembered that it was written, The zeal of thine house hath eaten me up.” (John 2:13–17, KJV 1900)

Other examples of righteous anger listed in the New Testament are...

· Acts 17:16 when, in righteous anger, arriving in Athen, Paul’s “spirit was stirred in him, when he saw the city wholly given to idolatry.” (Acts 17:16, KJV 1900) The Expository Dictionary of New Testament Words indicates that this phrase means that Paul’s spirit was roused to anger.

· 2 Corinthians 7:9-11 when the Holy Spirit used Paul’s righteous anger to rebuke the local church of Corinth for their various sins.

“Now I rejoice, not that ye were made sorry, but that ye sorrowed to repentance: for ye were made sorry after a godly manner, that ye might receive damage by us in nothing. For godly sorrow worketh repentance to salvation not to be repented of: but the sorrow of the world worketh death. For behold this selfsame thing, that ye sorrowed after a godly sort, what carefulness it wrought in you, yea, what clearing of yourselves, yea, what indignation, yea, what fear, yea, what vehement desire, yea, what zeal, yea, what revenge! In all things ye have approved yourselves to be clear in this matter.” (2 Corinthians 7:9–11, KJV 1900)

The passages we just looked at clearly indicate that there are two kinds of anger. There is a sinful kind of anger that is destructive and ungodly, and there is a righteous kind of anger that is constructive and godly.

When Is Our Anger Sinful? What Are The Characteristics of Sinful Anger?

Our anger is sinful when we become angry for the wrong reasons. In many cases, our anger is roused because of our selfishness. Selfish angers is always a sin.

Example of Cain

Genesis 4:5 KJV 1900

5 But unto Cain and to his offering he had not respect. And Cain was very wroth, and his countenance fell.

Cain’s anger was a sinfully selfish anger.

Cain was jealous of his brother.

When we become angry because someone else is receiving attention or appreciation that we are not, our anger is sinful.

Example of Ahab

1 Kings 21:4 KJV 1900

4 And Ahab came into his house heavy and displeased because of the word which Naboth the Jezreelite had spoken to him: for he had said, I will not give thee the inheritance of my fathers. And he laid him down upon his bed, and turned away his face, and would eat no bread.

Ahab’s anger was a sinfully selfish anger.

He coveted Naboth’s vineyard.

He became depressed and angry.

He was angry because he was denied the vineyard he coveted.

We often become upset because the “rights” we have are denied. The example given is parent who become angry with their children for failing to do something exactly as they, the parents, wanted it done. Thu, in their mind, their children don’t treat them the way they wanted to be treated. So they become peeved and upset and openly express their annoyance with their children. When that happens, the parent’s anger has nothing to do with what is best for the children. It’ simply due to the fact that children are not doing what they wanted them to do. Their rights have been denied. The result is sinful, selfish anger.

Example of Herodias

Her sin was a sinful, selfish anger.

She was upset because her sinful lifestyle was exposed by John the Baptist.

She felt she had the “right” to live as she pleased.

Example of King Saul

His sin was a sinful, selfish anger.

He was jealous of the praise and recognition David received.

He felt his “right” was to receive more praise from Israel than David.

Example of the Prodigal Son’s Brother

When the older brother found out what his father had done, he became resentful and angry. He refused to come into the house. Why? He was hurt by his father’s attention to this younger brother and jealous of the honor that he was receiving. In other words, he was selfishly angry.

Our anger is always sinful when it’s cause by our selfishness.

Whether we have had our feelings hurt, or we are jealous, or we are not getting recognition, or we believe that our “rights” are being denied - all of these things lead to sinful, selfish anger.

Our anger is sinful when we allow our anger to control us.

Proverbs 16:32 KJV 1900

32 He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; And he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city.

Proverbs 25:28 KJV 1900

28 He that hath no rule over his own spirit Is like a city that is broken down, and without walls.

These verses are warning us against being controlled by our spirit, which is partly made up of our emotions, rather than being in control of our spirit. We usually find it easier to allow the emotion of anger to control us than to maintain control of our anger.

“I was so angry I just could’t help myself!”

Such statements are simply excuses for being out of control and from the actions that resulted from their anger. People who say this are claiming no responsibility for what they have done, because they were at the mercy of their anger. The truth, of course, is that their actions were sinful. Any time we allow our anger to control us, we are sinning.

Whenever we allow our anger to dictate how we act and to keep us from fulfilling our Biblical responsibilities, our anger is sinful.

Our anger is sinful when it becomes the dominant feature of our lives.

If other people’s first impressions of us are that we are touchy, irritable, or easily annoyed, then we may have a problem with sinful anger. If we find that people seem to be constantly “tiptoeing” around us, it could be an indication that we have a chronic problem with sinful anger.

Proverbs 19:19 KJV 1900

19 A man of great wrath shall suffer punishment: For if thou deliver him, yet thou must do it again.

Proverbs 22:24 KJV 1900

24 Make no friendship with an angry man; And with a furious man thou shalt not go:

These verses describe the type of people who we could call “anger addicts.” They have turned the reins of their lives over to anger and are completely under its control. It’s the norm - the pattern of their lives - for them to be angry.

The two verses from Proverbs refer to the same idea, except the addiction is to anger: anger is the immediate, natural response when the pressure is on. When this is true of someone, he or she is exhibiting sinful anger.

If that kind of anger is characteristic of our lives, we need to recognize and deal with it because it’s sinful anger.

Conclusion

Anger can be godly and constructive or it can be ungodly and destructive. When God expresses anger, it always righteous. When we express our anger, it’s often - if not usually - unrighteous. Anger that occurs for sinful reasons, such as jealousy, is sinful anger. Anger that controls us - causes us to act out of passion - is likewise sinful anger. Anger that is the dominant feature of our lives is sinful anger as well.

Discussion Questions

What do you think about the idea that anger is sometimes righteous and sometimes sinful?

What Biblical statements support the concept of righteous anger?

What Biblical examples of righteous anger were given in this study?

What did the statement mean that our anger is sinful when we become angry for the wrong reasons?

Identify what, in many cases, arouses our anger and makes it sinful?

What does the issue of rights have to do with sinful anger?

What did the statement mean that our anger is sinful when we allow it to control us?

What happens when we allow our anger to control us?

What did the statement mean that anger is sinful when it becomes the dominant feature of a person’s life?

What happens when anger becomes the dominant feature of a person’s life?