Ephesians 5:21 - 6:9: Biblical Headship & Submittion

Introduction

Ephesians 5:21–6:9 (NIV)

Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church—for we are members of his body. “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise—“so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.”

Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.

Slaves, obey your earthly masters with respect and fear, and with sincerity of heart, just as you would obey Christ. Obey them not only to win their favor when their eye is on you, but as slaves of Christ, doing the will of God from your heart. Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not people, because you know that the Lord will reward each one for whatever good they do, whether they are slave or free.

And masters, treat your slaves in the same way. Do not threaten them, since you know that he who is both their Master and yours is in heaven, and there is no favoritism with him.

The Cultural Crtics of Roman & The Modern West Values

Romans Values

He challeneges there view of herirachy of Diginity of persons

He challenges as Roman notion of authority and Leadership as dominance and control.

He challenges them all social and family Leadership will be held accountability to God.

He challenges Roman marriages were often utilitarian, focused on social and economic alliances rather than love.

West Values

Apostle Pual, who often challenges our view that there is no hierachys of Responsibilities.

He challenges our view of submittion as weakness verse humility and respect

Paul’s teaching that all work is ultimately service to Christ (Eph. 6:7-8) challenges both view of work and any complacency and the pursuit of personal ambition without regard for others as sin.

The Call to Spiritual Leadership & Spirtual Submittion

Some of the Misconceptions of Headship

Headship means that the husband has the right to control and dominate his wife and family, making all decisions unilaterally without considering their input or feelings.

Biblical headship is about servant leadership, not authoritarian control.

Headship implies that men are superior to women or that a husband is more valuable than his wife.

Galatians 3:28 emphasizes that in Christ, there is no distinction in value between men and women. Both are created in the image of God (Genesis 1:27) and have equal worth and dignity. Headship and submission are roles within the marriage relationship, not indicators of personal value or capability.

Headship means that the husband is the "final say" but does not need to actively engage in the spiritual, emotional, or relational leadership of the family.

Biblical headship is an active, sacrificial role. Husbands are called to be the spiritual leaders of their households (Ephesians 6:4), guiding their families in godliness, love, and discipline. They are to take initiative in loving, teaching, and protecting their families, not merely making decisions when conflicts arise.

Headship gives the husband the right to mistreat, manipulate, or abuse his wife and children, using Scripture to justify harmful behavior.

Abuse of any kind is a grave distortion of biblical headship. Ephesians 5:29 states that a husband should care for his wife as he cares for his own body, nurturing and cherishing her. Headship that involves abuse, coercion, or manipulation is sinful and not reflective of Christ’s sacrificial love for the Church.

Headship is sometimes viewed as a role without accountability,

Marriage is designed as a partnership where both husband and wife are co-heirs of grace (1 Peter 3:7). A godly husband values his wife’s wisdom and input and makes decisions collaboratively, considering her perspective and seeking mutual agreement. Proverbs 31 portrays a wife as an active, capable partner whose contributions are essential to the household.

Defination of biblical headship

The call to a married men, to spiritual lead your family by love, nurturement and teaching the word. Its a call for spiritual Leadership in the home.

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church

make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church

husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church

Biblical Submittion

Voluntary and Willing:

Biblical submission is not about coercion or forced obedience. It is a voluntary act motivated by love, respect, and devotion to God and others.

Rooted in Christ-like Humility:

Submission reflects the humility of Christ, .In the context of marriage, wives are instructed to submit to their husbands “as to the Lord” (Ephesians 5:22), meaning their submission is a way of honoring Christ, not a devaluation of their own worth.

Respect for God’s Order

Submission in Scripture often pertains to recognizing and respecting God’s established order within various relationships, such as between Christ and the Church, husbands and wives, parents and children, and governing authorities.Romans 13:1-2 emphasizes submitting to governing authorities because they are instituted by God, recognizing His sovereignty over all human structures for our Good.

Mutual and Reciprocal:

Biblical submission is not one-sided but often mutual. Ephesians 5:21-22 starts with a call to "submit to one another," before addressing specific roles within marriage. This shows that submission involves mutual respect and serving one another, rather than domination or subjugation.

Bound by Righteousness and Conscience:

Submission to human authority is limited by one's ultimate submission to God. When human commands contradict God’s commands, believers must obey God rather than men (Acts 5:29).It’s important to distinguish biblical submission from blind obedience.

Application

Men if you decided to get married you have a great resposniblitie to be spiritual leaders in your family, Start perparing for that call by studying the Word of God and put it into practice.

Women dont marry a man you dont trust and you feel would lead you spiritually.

We are all called to submit to another, and that means we should fear God and be slow to speak and open to yeild to each others requests out of love for church.