Looking Out for One Another - Romans 14:14-23

Copyright October 6, 2024 by Rev. Bruce Goettsche

Last week we began our look at the issue that Paul raises about the differences in our lives and the different conclusions we draw about various topics. Rick showed us that diversity is not the enemy, it is an opportunity to learn and to extend grace. We are HIS followers and HIS servants. And because of that, He alone can judge between those who are right and those who are wrong when we differ on issues not explicit in the Bible.

This morning, we will see how Paul continues this teaching in the words of Romans 14:14-23. The general theme it seems is this: though God alone stands as the Judge, we are still supposed to look out for each other. He calls us to help each other as we grow.

When Paul was writing a great deal of change was taking place. Those who grew up Jewish and recognized Jesus as the promised Messiah were now learning to see the “Chosen People” not just as Jews, but as anyone who put their faith in Christ. The laws that set Israel apart from the rest of the world, now had to be understood in a new way that embraced the Gentile (or non-Jewish) believers. Things that used to be “cut and dried,” established by years of tradition were now not so clear. And that created tension in the church. Change is always hard. But change also seems to always be taking place around us.

There was a time not that long ago when it would have been considered scandalous for a woman to come to church in something other than a dress and a hat on her head. Likewise, a man would not have come to church without being clad in a suit. The idea was we should look our best for worship. As life became more relaxed, so did the attire in worship. We now focus on the fact that God is more interested in our heart than our attire; sometimes the attire became a matter of pride or arrogance that divided rather than unified the church.

Not all change is to be embraced. There are areas where change is sinful. The contemporary church struggles with that today. As a result, there is a wide variety of beliefs, many of which have divided churches and denominations such as: turning away from the Bible as the sole authority, changing attitudes toward marriage and sex, attempts to be inclusive (of other non- Christian religions) resulting in a watering down of doctrinal beliefs, worship that is geared to please people rather than honor God.

When we ignore clear commands of God that are given to the church (not just to Israel) we are in full rebellion against God. When God’s truth and our personal opinions have the same authority, we have departed from Biblical faith and are no longer Christians. There are issues of morality that transcend time. There are theological truths that are essential to the nature of Christianity. If someone changes these truths or “adapts” them, or “deconstructs them” (a buzz word for those who do this with regularity) they are denying and abandoning the faith. They are creating a new religion and passing it off as Christianity. It is in every sense as insidious as the idolatry we find in the Old Testament.

The problem is that on non-essential truth, determining whether something is a departure of the faith, or just a difference in expressing the Christian faith is not always clear. That brings us to our text. We pick up where we left off last week in Romans 14:14

14 I know and am convinced on the authority of the Lord Jesus that no food, in and of itself, is wrong to eat. But if someone believes it is wrong, then for that person it is wrong. 15 And if another believer is distressed by what you eat, you are not acting in love if you eat it. Don’t let your eating ruin someone for whom Christ died. 16 Then you will not be criticized for doing something you believe is good.

Principle One: It is a Sin to Act Contrary to What You Believe is True

Paul restates his conviction: there is no food in and of itself that is wrong to eat. Before you “check out” of this message, understand that Paul is using food as an illustration of his principle.

Paul recognized (as did Peter see Acts 10) that the food laws of the Old Testament were no longer in force. Those laws were designed to set the Jews apart as God’s people and separate them from the world. Now, the gospel had come also to the Gentiles . . . these laws were no longer necessary.

In 1 Corinthians there was a different food issue. In that case the issue was meat that had been sacrificed before idols. It is possible, that since it was in a sense “used meat” it was greatly discounted. Many believers felt it was fine to take advantage of the lower prices because, having been offered to idol, which is nothing, means the meat was offered to nothing . . . so why not take the discount?

Paul affirmed the truthfulness of these things . . .HOWEVER, he pointed out that some people felt if they ate the meat that had been offered to idols, there was a sense in which they might be seen as supporting idol worship which would be wrong. They would not buy that discounted meat and felt it was wrong to do so.

Both parties felt their convictions were correct. Paul tells us that we must not go against what we believe to be true . . . because that is sin. (If someone believes it is wrong, then for that person it is wrong.) . Why? Is this sin? The conscience is God’s inbuilt warning system. When we go against the conscience we are diminishing or deadening the conscience and that is like turning off the traffic lights or the gate at a railroad crossing. You are opening yourself up to problems.

There is of course a limit to this. If the Bible speaks explicitly on something (such as “you should not commit adultery” or “you shall not steal” or “not bear false witness”) we are wrong in violating such commands even if our “conscience does not bother us.” We have an endless ability to justify sin. This happens because we have deadened our conscience.

Principle Two: We Need to Consider How Our Actions Affect Others

Paul challenges us to look out for each other. He says, if someone might be encouraged to do something they believe is wrong by the exercise of our freedom . . . We should, out of love, be willing to restrict our freedom to enable that person to be faithful to what they believe to be true.

20 Don’t tear apart the work of God over what you eat. Remember, all foods are acceptable, but it is wrong to eat something if it makes another person stumble. 21 It is better not to eat meat or drink wine or do anything else if it might cause another believer to stumble. 22 You may believe there’s nothing wrong with what you are doing, but keep it between yourself and God. Blessed are those who don’t feel guilty for doing something they have decided is right. 23 But if you have doubts about whether or not you should eat something, you are sinning if you go ahead and do it. For you are not following your convictions. If you do anything you believe is not right, you are sinning

So, you could be doing what is acceptable to do as follower of Christ and still be wrong in doing do so because you are leading another person to go against their conscience or to turn off the warning lights that are essential.

Let me illustrate this. If someone feels they should not go out to eat or shop on Sundays, then you should not invite them to go to the restaurant with you or to go shopping. You should respect their convictions. If the exercise of my freedom causes another person to change what they had been convinced God wanted them to do, then my behavior has led them astray. That is an unloving act toward my brother or sister in Christ.

A big issue is alcohol. The Bible clearly condemns intoxication. Why? Because you are then being controlled by a substance rather than by the Holy Spirit. Some people enjoy having a beer and some Dorito’s while watching a game or after working outside. Others like to have a little wine with their dinner. The Bible does not condemn that.

Paul’s concern is that a young (or new) believer may see you drinking and may conclude that if it is OK for a mature Christian to drink, then it must be OK for me to drink too. They may drink because of your example and end up becoming addicted, doing something reckless, driving while intoxicated or completely undermining their witness.

Do you know why we serve grape juice at communion? It is because of this very thing. There are some who would taste wine and see it as license to drink. (If it is OK to drink in church, why would it be wrong to drink at home, out with friends, or at a party somewhere?) Some of those people would drink to excess and embarrass themselves and dishonor God by their actions. And some of those people who have struggled with addiction to alcohol might be led down a path back to addiction and enslavement.

Likewise, if you have a friend who struggles with alcohol, you shouldn’t suggest going to a bar for dinner any more than you would play cards for pennies if you know that your friend battles a gambling problem.

There are a host of other areas where we can disagree: should Christians play video games, should we listen to secular music, Is it OK to play cards, is it OK to dance, is it appropriate to get tattoos? All of these issues can become areas of conflict. We must learn to always ask, “What is the broader impact of the choices I make?”

But here’s the question: how far do you go with this? Isn’t it possible there will always be someone who is offended by some of our choices? Does this mean we should never enjoy the freedom that is ours in Christ?

We must be mindful of those who are weak or young in the faith. But we also need to be mindful of those who are just controlling. They find their identity in trying to be the mom to other adults. These people aare offended by our use of freedom because it does not square with the way they want things to be They insist that you live life according to their rules and their consciences. They want your experience to match theirs. (This sounds like the Pharisees and Sadducees, doesn’t it?) Such people define himself by what they don’t do. And they don’t want you to do those things either! Often this is not a weaker brother . . . He is an arrogant brother trying to manipulate us to give up our freedom in Christ.

Principle Three: Our Choices Will Either Advance the Kingdom of God or Stifle the Growth of the Kingdom

Remember verse 20: “Don’t tear apart the work of God over something you eat.” Our pettiness or concern only for our needs, desires, and freedoms, can hinder the progress of God’s Kingdom. Our choices can push others away from Christ and we can cause a stain on His reputation. What is more important to you: getting your way, or building the Kingdom? If you aren’t sure, err on the side of sacrificing your freedom, to make sure you are not hurting the advance of HIs Kingdom.

How many people do you know who have left a church because of a conflict over something in the church? Sometimes it is a doctrinal issue. Too much of the time the conflict was because of a stubborn disagreement.

There are many areas, as Rick said last week, where we might have differences of opinion. How we handle those differences will either deepen the church or split the church. God is never glorified when God’s people cannot get along or become selfish, or petty. His reputation can suffer because of our behavior. It is important we remember that the Kingdom of God is MUCH more important than building our own Kingdom!

Principle Four: The Issue is More About the Heart than What We Do.

17 For the Kingdom of God is not a matter of what we eat or drink, but of living a life of goodness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit. 18 If you serve Christ with this attitude, you will please God, and others will approve of you, too. 19 So then, let us aim for harmony in the church and try to build each other up.

We have been set free in Christ, but not set free from our obligation to watch out for each other. Notice what Paul tells us in these verses. It is about learning to live in the Spirit. Part of this is pursuing harmony in the church.

When we live a life “of goodness, and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit”, several things will happen. First, we will please God. We will please Him because this is what He wants from the church. Jesus prayed, “Let them be one as we are one.”

There was a time when a number of people were joining our church and were coming from many different backgrounds. I had a Pastor say to me, “You should probably think about moving on because it is inevitable that your church is going to blow up with all those differences. I told him that I thought just the opposite would happen. I believe differences can help keep us honest and on track. It is the group of people who all think the same way on every issue that because the dangerous extremists in life.

Second, When we show consideration for each other even the world will take notice. We are living in a world where people seem to be only concerned with what they want. Their cry is: “I want to do this! The Bible doesn’t say this is wrong, so I don’t care what others think! When the world sees the people of the church looking out for each other, the world can’t help but be impressed. In the early years of the church, even the unbelievers commented on how much these people loved one another.

We should be willing to discuss the issues that divide us. That “discussion” (I’ve chosen that word carefully) should be reflective, loving, and respectful. As we discuss things our perspective may not change, but our understanding of issues and of each other will change and make us better servants of God and more tolerant of each other. We will come to see that people with a different opinion are not sinful, they are not idiots, they are not uncommitted, they simply have a different emphasis. And that understanding will help us to work together to build up the Kingdom of God. And in the process we will be reparing soe oft

Conclusions

There are some good general principles here, but you may still be saying “so what?” So, let’s ask the question: What changes should be implemented in our lives because of this passage in the Word of God?

First, and probably foremost, when making choices in life, we must consider not only whether or not it is forbidden, but also how our choices will impact others and the Kingdom of God.

We are much too short-sighted in our decision making. We tend to ask: “Do I want to do this?” or “Is it sinful to do this?” or “Can I afford it, or at least justify the debt?” Paul wrote in Corinthians that all things are lawful but not everything is beneficial (1 Cor. 10:23). We need to anticipate the ripple effect of our choices. We must ask: could this lead someone else astray or turn turn off the warning lights of their conscience? Is this something that will advance the Kingdom of God or will it hinder its advancement? The truth we need to get through our head is this: the Kingdom of God is always more important than our own satisfaction and pleasures.

Anyone who has served in a war would tell you that if they only did what was in accord with their satisfaction and pleasure they would all go home! Instead, they had to focus on the bigger picture. There was freedom to be defended. There were boundaries that needed to be erected. There were wrongs that needed to be made right.

Second, the Kingdom of God is about people, not programs, gimmicks, or personal fame. If we are trying to pad our own ego, or promote our church above others, the church is going to do more harm than good. We are dividing the church rather than bringing it together! We are part of ONE kingdom. God brought us together because we work most efficiently as a team. If everyone is doing their part, if everyone is showing consideration to others, the church will be a shining light in the world. It is the only way to bring the world back from the brink of destruction. It is not a political candidate; it is the Holy Spirit working through His people unselfishly loving each other that changed the world.

Third, looking out for each other demands that we know each other. We can’t be considerate of each other if we don’t know each other. We need to know each other’s hurts, needs, strengths and weaknesses. That is why regular attendance at worship matters. One of the problems of the contemporary megachurch movement is how difficult it is to get to really know people. It is too easy for people to be anonymous in the church family and feel OK about that.

This is also why we debated putting our livestream online. We were concerned it would make people content to sit at home, learn more information, and feel they “didn’t need the church.” But we do need the church! We need the interaction, the encouragement, and at times even correction. If you are absenting yourself from church, you are missing and important avenue of growth . . . and you are robbing others of the growth they might gain from you!

If we really know each other, we can help head problems off before they get too entrenched. We can say what only a friend can say: “You are headed for trouble, let me help you.” Our care for each other must never involve overlooking sinful behaviors in our brothers and sisters. We wouldn’t simply shrug at someone’s cancer; by the same token we should not shrug at the sinful rebellion or struggles of our brothers and sisters in Christ. We are called to care, to really care. We must care enough to lovingly and humbly confront each other and be willing to care enough to even surrender some of our personal freedoms if that is what it takes to protect the soul of another. The world aches for the people of God to be who God created us to be.