Homely Mindset

Title: Homely Mindset

Text: Philippians 2:14-19

D.T. Most grumbling and complaining is rooted in resentment.

Introduction: Last week I told you a story about Chick-fil-a, this week I am going to talk about Popeyes. Here’s the thing about Popeyes, I like their chicken better, I like their biscuits better, I think that Mardi Gras mustard is superior to Chick-fil-a sauce. Yet I will never contest that Chick-fil-a is the better restaurant, and it’s because they have always made me feel more welcome. As a matter of fact, one of the more unwelcome experiences happened at Popeyes. This actually happened to me immediately after I met with the search and call team here at Central Church. (Tell TA Popeyes story) The hostile grumbling and complaining made these employees a bad representation of their company. The hostile grumbling and complaining made me feel very unwelcome at their establishment. Since we are in a series called “Welcome Home” it seems obvious we seek out to avoid behaviors which make others feel unwelcome. Therefore we must make a conscious effort to eliminate grumbling and complaining because it undermines a welcome home. In the book of Philippians the Apostle Paul speaks about hoe Christians are to live out their faith. In chapter 2 Paul directly mentions grumbling and complaining as a behavior to avoid. Why? Likely because of how it can damage reputation, and make others feel unwelcome.

READ Philippians 2:13-18

Philippians 2:13–18 ESV

for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure. Do all things without grumbling or disputing, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world, holding fast to the word of life, so that in the day of Christ I may be proud that I did not run in vain or labor in vain. Even if I am to be poured out as a drink offering upon the sacrificial offering of your faith, I am glad and rejoice with you all. Likewise you also should be glad and rejoice with me.

It’s worth noting that Paul says we are to do all things without grumbling and complaining. Paul isn’t separating the scared and the secular. Paul doesn’t suggest that in all things sacred (church related) we are to refrain from grumbling and complaining, however we are free to complain about our issues outside of the church.

The implication seems to suggest that grumbling and complaining about our lives outside of the church can affect people's perception of the church.

Paul confirms this whole push to refrain from grumbling and complaining is rooted in how the church is viewed from an outside perspective.

So I don’t think it’s stretching the text to say that a lack of grumbling and complaining helps the outsider view us as a welcome home.

The question we are left with is how do we eliminate grumbling and complaining from our lives?

We need to ask ourselves what fuels our grumbling and complaining.

Most grumbling and complaining is rooted in resentment.

Resentment is described as being a merging of anger, bitterness, disgust, disappointment and or disapproval. Resentment is often caused by

Being taken advantage of by others

Being put down, dismissed, or ignored

Unrealistic expectations

Feeling as if authority is undermined

Bad news, If you have relationships with family, friends, or co-workers, you are prone to experiencing resentment.

Worse news, If you are in a position where you serve others, you are even more prone to experiencing resentment. What is the purpose of the church and the gospel? To be a service to others, we are prone to resentment.

So let’s keep peeling back the layers. If grumbling and complaining is fueled by resentment, what fuels our resentment?

Resentment is fueled by a poor understanding of humility. Our discussion last week was rooted in humility. So conventional wisdom says that if grumbling and complaining is fueled by humility, it’s because we have a lack of humility. That would be incorrect. Grumbling and complaining is more likely to be fueled by a poor understanding of what it means to be humble.There is this idea that being humble means we must have a negative perception of ourselves and subject ourselves to a low-self esteem. I am here to tell you, if we try to be humble while having a negative perception of ourselves and allow ourselves to be taken advantage of, we are going to fail. Why? Remember back to the characteristics of what causes resentment. Some believe that being humble means subjecting yourself to what breeds resentment. Which is why having a poor understanding of humility fuels resentment. We may think we are serving others, but in reality we are setting ourselves up to resent those we are called to serve.

Therefore in order for us to remove resentment from our lives, we must approach humility this way. Humility isn’t thinking less of yourself, it’s thinking of yourself less. We are fearfully and wonderfully made in the eyes of our creator, and he has given us value. So let’s use the value that is given to us to allow ourselves to think of ourselves less, because Jesus thinks about us and our needs plenty. Let that give us the freedom to humbly serve others. Sometimes that means we have to say no, sometimes we have to tell others what they are suggesting makes us uncomfortable. Sometimes being humble means we learn how to say no with kindness and love, not defensiveness. Most of the time, people understand when we frame things in a kind and caring fashion. This is how we work towards having a better understanding of humility. We may struggle to adjust the way we view humility, we may struggle eliminating resentment, grumbling and complaining from our lives.

Paul knows this, and accounted for this. Part of what it means to work out our salvation with fear and trembling is to learn and grow how to better live out of faith. This includes having a better understanding of humility, and this includes removing resentment.

When you take something apart to work on it, you have to put it back together right? We peeled back plenty of layers today. However now we’ve discussed the root issues, let’s put the layers back together. Let’s reassemble what we disassembled. In order to eliminate resentment, we must properly understand humility. If we remove resentment we are better positioned to remove grumbling and complaining. If we remove grumbling and complaining, we will be set up to become a welcome home.