The joy filled home. PT I

In VS. 17-33 Paul has a lot to say here and there have been many people turning to these two passages; that I will present to you to prove their points, but please let’s not take these words of Paul out of context. I hope that I give you another way of looking at these two passages.

We will start with Ephesians 5:17-21 this week and round out next week with 22-33.

Paul makes a statement in vs. 32-33 that stuck with me throughout the week. His statement comes at the end of these passages, and it goes like this.

Ephesians 5:32-33

New American Standard Bible

32 This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church.

33 Nevertheless, as for you individually, each husband is to love his own wife the same as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband.

Now let’s start with Ephesians 5:17-21.

Ephesians 5:17–21 (NIV84)

17 Therefore do not be foolish but understand what the Lord’s will is. 18 Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit. 19 Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, 20 always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.

21 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

Charles Haddon Spurgeon said, “When home is ruled according to God’s Word, angels might be asked to stay with us, and they would not find themselves out of their element.”

The trouble is that many homes are not governed by God’s Word—even homes where the members are professing Christians—and the consequences are tragic. Instead of angels being guests in some homes, it seems that demons are the masters. Too many marriages end in the divorce court, and nobody knows how many husbands and wives are emotionally divorced even though they share the same address. The poet William Cowper called the home “the only bliss of Paradise that hast survived the Fall,” but too many homes are an outpost of hell instead of a parcel of paradise.

The answer is the Holy Spirit of God! It is only through the power of the Holy Spirit that we can walk in harmony as husbands and wives (Eph. 5:22–33), parents and children (Eph. 6:1–4), and employers and employees (Eph. 6:5–9). The unity of the people of God that Paul described (Eph. 4:1–16) must be translated into daily living if we are to enjoy the harmony that is a foretaste of heaven on earth.

Intro:

“Be filled with the Spirit” is God’s command, and He expects us to obey.

1. The command is plural, so it applies to all Christians and not just to a select few.

a. The verb is in the present tense— “keep on being filled”—so it is an experience we should enjoy constantly and not just on special occasions.

b. And the verb is passive.

2. We do not fill ourselves but permit the Spirit to fill us.

a. The verb “fill” has nothing to do with contents or quantity, as though we are empty vessels that need a required amount of spiritual fuel to keep going.

3. In the Bible, filled means “controlled by.”

a. “They … were filled with wrath” (Luke 4:28) means “they were controlled by wrath” and for that reason tried to kill Jesus.

b. “The Jews were filled with envy” (Acts 13:45) means that the Jews were controlled by envy and opposed the ministry of Paul and Barnabas.

c. To be “filled with the Spirit” means to be constantly controlled by the Spirit in our mind, emotions, and will.

4. When a person trusts Christ as his Saviour, he is immediately baptized by the Spirit into the body of Christ (1 Cor. 12:13).

a. Nowhere in the New Testament are we commanded to be baptized by the Spirit, because this is a once-for-all experience that takes place at conversion.

b. When the Spirit came at Pentecost, the believers were baptized by the Spirit and thus the body of Christ was formed (Acts 1:4–5).

i. But they were also “filled with the Spirit” (Acts 2:4), and it was this filling that gave them the power they needed to witness for Christ (Acts 1:8).

c. In Acts 2, the Jewish believers were baptized by the Spirit, and in Acts 10 the Gentile believers had the same experience (Acts 10:44–48; 11:15–17).

i. Thus the body of Christ was made up of Jews and Gentiles (Eph. 2:11–22).

d. That historic baptism, in two stages, has never been repeated any more than Calvary has been repeated.

i. But that baptism is made personal when the sinner trusts Christ and the Spirit enters in to make him a member of the body of Christ.

ii. The baptism of the Spirit means that I belong to Christ’s body.

iii. The filling of the Spirit means that my body belongs to Christ.

5. We usually think of the power of the Spirit as necessary for preaching and witnessing, and this is true. (See Acts 4:8, 31; 6:3, 5; 7:55; 13:9. The Apostles experienced repeated fillings after that initial experience at Pentecost.)

a. But Paul wrote that the Spirit’s fullness is also needed in the home.

b. If our homes are to be a heaven on earth, then we must be controlled by the Holy Spirit.

c. But how can a person tell whether or not he is filled with the Spirit?

i. Paul stated that there are three evidences of the fullness of the Spirit in the life of the believer: he is joyful (Eph. 5:19), thankful (Eph. 5:20), and submissive (Eph. 5:21–33).

d. Paul said nothing about miracles or tongues, or other special manifestations.

e. He stated that the home can be a heaven on earth if each family member is controlled by the Spirit, and is joyful, thankful, and submissive.

We will be looking at the first two this week and then I will finnish of chapter 5 next week with a very controversial passage.

Point I

Joyful (Eph. 5:19)

Joy is one of the fruits of the Spirit (Gal. 5:22).

1. Christian joy is not a shallow emotion that, like a thermometer, rises and falls with the changing atmosphere of the home.

a. Rather, Christian joy is a deep experience of adequacy and confidence in spite of the circumstances around us.

b. The Christian can be joyful even in the midst of pain and suffering.

i. This kind of joy is not a thermometer but a thermostat.

ii. Instead of rising and falling with the circumstances, it determines the spiritual temperature of the circumstances.

c. Paul put it beautifully when he wrote, “I have learned in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content” (Phil. 4:11).

2. To illustrate this joy, Paul used the familiar image of drunkenness: “Be not drunk with wine … but be filled with the Spirit” (Eph. 5:18).

a. When the believers at Pentecost were filled with the Spirit, the crowd accused them of being drunk with new wine (Acts 2:13–15).

b. There was such joyfulness about them that the unbelievers could think of no better comparison.

c. But some practical lessons can be learned from the contrasts. To begin with, the drunk is under the control of another force, since alcohol is actually a depressant.

i. He feels a great sense of release—all his troubles are gone. He can “whoop anybody in the house!”

ii. The drunk is not ashamed to express himself (though what he says and does is shameful), nor can he hide what is going on in his life.

3. Transfer this picture to the believer who is filled with the Spirit.

a. God controls his life, and he experiences a deep joy he is not afraid to express to the glory of God.

i. Of course, the drunk is really out of control, since the alcohol affects his brain, while the believer experiences a beautiful self-control that is really God in control.

b. Self-control is among the fruit of the Spirit (Gal. 5:23).

c. The drunk makes a fool of himself, but the Spirit-filled Christian glorifies God and is willing to be a “fool for Christ’s sake” (1 Cor. 4:10).

d. The drunk calls attention to himself, while the Spirit-filled believer is a witness for Christ.

4. It is certainly not difficult to live or work with someone who is filled with the Spirit and joyful.

a. He has a song in his heart and on his lips. The drunk often sings, but his songs only reveal the corruption in his heart.

b. The Spirit-filled Christian’s song comes from God, a song he could never sing apart from the Spirit’s power.

c. God even gives us songs in the night (Ps. 42:8).

d. In spite of pain and shame, Paul and Silas were able to sing praises to God in the Philippian jail (Acts 16:25), and the result was the conversion of the jailer and his family.

i. What a happy time they all had that midnight hour—and they did not need to get drunk to enjoy it!

Warren Wiersbe told this story, in his commentary on Ephesians ‘

“Your neighborhood tavern is the friendliest place in town!” That slogan appeared in a headline of a special newspaper insert during “National Tavern Month,” so he decided to test its veracity. He watched the newspapers for several weeks and cut out items that related to taverns—and all of them were connected with brawls and murders. The friendliest place in town! But this headline reminded him that people who drink together often experience a sympathy and hospitality.

e. This fact is no argument for alcohol, but it does illustrate a point: Christians who are filled with the Holy Spirit enjoy being together and experience a sense of joyful oneness in the Lord.

i. They do not need the false stimulants of the world. They have the Spirit of God—and He is all they need.

Point II

Thankful (Eph. 5:20)

Someone defined the home as “the place where we are treated the best—and complain the most!”

A teenager once said, “My father never talks to me unless he wants to bawl me out or ask about my grades”.

1. Marriage counselors tell us that “taking each other for granted” is one of the chief causes of marital problems.

a. Being thankful to God for each other is a secret of a happy home, and it is the Holy Spirit who gives us the grace of thankfulness.

2. How does a grateful heart promote harmony in the home?

a. For one thing, the sincerely grateful person realizes that he is enriched because of others, which is a mark of humility.

b. The person who thinks the world owes him a living is never thankful for anything.

i. He thinks he is doing others a favor by permitting them to serve him.

c. The thankful heart is usually humble, a heart that gladly acknowledges God as the “Giver of every good and perfect gift” (James 1:17).

d. Like Mary’s gift to Jesus in John 12, gratitude fills the house with fragrance.

3. To be sure, all of us are grateful for some things at some special occasions; but Paul commanded his readers to be thankful for all things at all times.

a. This exhortation in itself proves our need of the Spirit of God, because in our own strength we could never obey this commandment.

i. Can we really be thankful in times of suffering, disappointment, and even bereavement?

b. Keep in mind that Paul was a prisoner when he wrote those words, yet he was thankful for what God was doing in him and for him (Eph. 1:16; 5:4, 20; Phil. 1:3; Col. 1:3, 12; 2:7; 3:17; 4:2).

c. When a Christian finds himself in a difficult situation, he should immediately give thanks to the Father, in the name of Jesus Christ, by the power of the Spirit, to keep his heart from complaining and fretting.

d. The devil moves in when a Christian starts to complain, but thanksgiving in the Spirit defeats the devil and glorifies the Lord. “In everything give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you” (1 Thes. 5:18).

Conclusion:

The word gratitude comes from the same root word as grace. If we have experienced the grace of God, then we ought to be grateful for what God brings to us. Thank and think also come from the same root word. If we think more, we will be more thankful.

Next week we will finish with the last evidence of the fullness of the spirit in the life of the believer that Paul instructs us about. “Submissiveness.”