Christian Relationships Ephesians 6:1-9
Notes
Transcript
Introduction:
Passage: Ephesians 6:1-9
1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.
2 Honor your father and mother (which is the first commandment with a promise),
3 so that it may be well with you, and that you may live long on the earth.
4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
5 Slaves, be obedient to those who are your masters according to the flesh, with fear and trembling, in the sincerity of your heart, as to Christ;
6 not by way of eyeservice, as men-pleasers, but as slaves of Christ, doing the will of God from the heart.
7 With good will render service, as to the Lord, and not to men,
8 knowing that whatever good thing each one does, this he will receive back from the Lord, whether slave or free.
9 And masters, do the same things to them, and give up threatening, knowing that both their Master and yours is in heaven, and there is no partiality with Him.
Transitional Sentence: There are appropriate times to submit or to lead within all relationships based on Paul’s description of the Parent-Child relationship and the Master-Slave relationship.
Parent-Child relationship
a. Children - obey (in the Lord) hypakouo - to obey v. — to be obedient to, listen to. The basic idea is that the child does what they are told. No whining or grumbling, no fuss and no negotiating, just do it. Asking why is alright, to a limit. There is a basic idea about not obeying the parents that needs to be understood too. That is when the parents tell the child to do something illegal, dangerous, or not in the best interest of the child or others. This is where obeying God rather than man is necessary. This is also where the child needs to know right from wrong and be willing to do right instead of wrong.
And then the children are to -
Honor the Father and Mother
Honor - Concept of worth especially resulting in high public esteem, fame, and glory
When Jesse and Kerri were younger and we took them out to eat they would always behave themselves. They talked with us and we would have a nice time together. This always brought honor to us, because, people sitting around us would notice and even tell us that it was refreshing to see children behaving and interacting with parents instead of interacting with a device.
This idea of honoring the Father and Mother comes directly from the ten commandments and is Law number 5. It carries with it a promise.
Exodus 20:12
12 “Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be prolonged in the land which the Lord your God gives you.
the promise is to have prolonged days in the land. Its not only the first commandment with a promise but the only.
The question is why? Why have a promise to have prolonged days in the land? Well the promise at the time of the giving of the 10 commandments goes along with Jewish law.
Leviticus 20:9 says:
9 ‘If there is anyone who curses his father or his mother, he shall surely be put to death; he has cursed his father or his mother, his bloodguiltiness is upon him.
and Deuteronomy 21:18-21 says:
18 “If any man has a stubborn and rebellious son who will not obey his father or his mother, and when they chastise him, he will not even listen to them,
19 then his father and mother shall seize him, and bring him out to the elders of his city at the gateway of his hometown.
20 “They shall say to the elders of his city, ‘This son of ours is stubborn and rebellious, he will not obey us, he is a glutton and a drunkard.’
21 “Then all the men of his city shall stone him to death; so you shall remove the evil from your midst, and all Israel will hear of it and fear.
Have you ever been taken out back behind the wood shed? That’s when there would be a beating. This Jewish law goes a little farther than that. Stoning generally involved the death of the individual being stoned. That child didn’t honor his parents. He didn’t live long in the land. So honor your parents, not for fear of being stoned but because it’s the right thing to do.
That was in a different time and a different culture, but now the promise is more general than that because we can’t take our kids out to the city gate and have them stoned. So honoring the Father and Mother won’t necessarily promise a long life but it is more likely. Children who honor their parents and are obedient tend to live longer because they avoid many things that can cause an early death. Things such as crime, knife and gun fights, drugs, alcohol, and foolish behavior. A Christian home should be a positive experience leading towards a longer life in the land.
b. And then we come to the role of the Parents. Yes parents, this includes you ladies too. Don’t provoke your children but bring them up in the Discipline and Instruction of the Lord. So what does it mean to provoke your children?
Provoke - parorgizo - provoke to anger, make angry. This isn’t a once in a while provocation. This is a continuous, provocation that brings about bitterness and hatred. This is the idea of a drunken parent beating a child or one that constantly berates and belittles them. This isn’t an oops I upset my children because of something I did in the moment. This is a constant spirit crushing behavior that changes them. This is the opposite behavior of bringing them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
So we are not to provoke them but we are to discipline and teach them.
Deuteronomy 6:4-9 says:
4 “Hear, O Israel! The Lord is our God, the Lord is one!
5 “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.
6 “These words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart.
7 “You shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up.
8 “You shall bind them as a sign on your hand and they shall be as frontals on your forehead.
9 “You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.
Discipline and instruction involve love. The parents have to do this because most everything else in the world will lead them away from the Lord. Most everything else in the world wants to destroy your children. The church can help your children to learn to walk with the Lord but the church can only do so much. Your children are only here for a short time each week. Make the most of the time you have with your children. Teach them diligently when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up. This is the greatest responsibility we have as parents - The Discipline and Instruction of our children in the Lord.
2. Master-Slave relationship
What is a Master - Slave relationship? The relationship between a Roman master and slave was characterized by mutual dependency and the master’s absolute power over the slave:
Power: The master had complete power over the slave, including the ability to buy, sell, punish, or kill them at any time.
Property: The slave was considered the master’s property and had no legal rights. The slave could not own property, enter into contracts or get married.
Treatment: Slaves were often whipped, branded, or mistreated.
Dependency: The master depended on the slave’s loyalty, while the slave depended on the master’s maintenance and humane treatment.
It is this type of relationship that Paul spoke about when he told slaves to be obedient and masters to be kind.
Master - Humans as Lord - In the NT the Greek kurios is used to designate one who exercises authority over another person. It also serves as a term of respectful address. The term kurios is also a title of honor sometimes rendered “sir” and is expressive of the respect and reverence with which servants salute their masters. It is employed by a son in addressing his father; by citizens toward magistrates; by anyone wishing to honor a man of distinction; by the disciples in saluting Jesus, their teacher and master.
a. Slaves obey
Slave — A person who works under the ownership or dominating influence of another. In biblical contexts, the word can describe varying levels of employment obligation ranging from voluntary service for a period of time to hired help to forced servitude.
Paul encouraged slaves to do what they were told according to the flesh. In this instance the slaves who were believers were encouraged to perform their duties as told. Not to rebel or ignore them. They should perform their duties well. They shouldn’t just do them well enough to get by without a beating but so well that the Lord Jesus would be pleased with their work. Do it so well that their masters according to the flesh would be amazed and appreciate their work. After all what they were doing was as much for Jesus as their human master.
What a believing slave does is done for Jesus because He is the one true Lord. He is the Master the work is actually being done for. 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 says:
19 Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own?
20 For you have been bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body.
The price for your salvation was paid by Jesus. He is the one true Lord and good obedience will be rewarded by Jesus. The good that is done in the flesh will be returned by Jesus. The hard work and completion of the work done well will be an example of the Christian heart to the Master.
In our current culture and context we don’t technically have a master-slave relationship, but the boss-subordinate relationship is like it. The boss being the master who provides direction and has power over the subordinate for good or ill. And the worker being the slave because the worker is in a position of submission to the boss.
So the worker should submit to the boss and do what the boss says but not to please the boss but to please the one true Lord - Christ Jesus. The worker should remember that no matter what happens in this life the Lord Jesus will repay whatever good is done in the day of the Lord. And as always your behavior and work will be noticed and make an impression of the boss which will always be a testimony of your faith.
b. Masters
Paul’s final encouragement of this passage is to the masters. The ones who are in a position of authority. Paul urges them to do the same things that he urged the slaves to do. The master should do his work well also. The master should be an example of hard work. Not to impress others but to glorify Jesus because the master just like the slave is subject to Christ.
There is one other thing that Paul tells the masters, stop threatening the slaves. A threat is an Intimidating announcement of action to be taken unless conditions are met. Threats are used against others as a means of restoring them to obedience and humility.
Threats should not be necessary in a master-slave relationship if the master is treating the slave well and if the slave is doing their work well.
The same thing goes for the boss-subordinate relationship in our context and culture. If the boss is working well, is an example for the subordinate and treats the subordinates well then there should be no need for threats.
So why would Paul choose threats as his main put off for a master? Isn’t there something else he could pick on?
Well the idea of a threat is to restore obedience and humility. Perhaps an occasional threat wouldn’t be too bad, but if that is the main way of ensuring obedience the subordinate isn’t going to be a good worker. There will only be enough loyalty there to please the one doing the threatening. Just enough to stay out of trouble and that won’t please the Lord Jesus.
Why exactly would threats be so bad. Demanding obedience and humility through threats degrades a persons self worth and creates an uneasy and uncomfortable work place.
Some examples of threats in the workplace now might be:
*Excessive fault-finding and complaining
*Verbal put downs
*Hostile gestures
*Bullying
*Discrimination/harassment
*Name-calling
*Indirect or direct threats of harm
*Physical violence
So the idea of the slave or the subordinate doing the work as though it is being done for the Lord Jesus removes the master or boss who may or may not be a good one from the picture. Even though the master or boss is still there the work is done to please another master who is higher up on the chain of command.
When I first joined the Army I was not a believer. I had a really hard time working for my first supervisor and and was thinking of getting out before I had even started. But then I was reassigned and the second supervisor was much better. So everything changed. But then, after I accepted Christ and learned that I should be performing my work for Him it didn’t matter what the supervisor was like anymore. So by doing the work for Christ Jesus I could work for and impress the worldly boss whether or not that person was a good boss or not.
And the same thing works with how the master or boss treats the slave or subordinate. The work ethic of a slave or subordinate improves when the treatment of the individual by the master improves. No one responds well to threats and beatings. Grace wins.
c. Just before the end of the passage in verses 7&8 Paul slips in a reminder of why rendering service to the Lord is more desirable than to man. Believers, whether slave or free, boss or subordinate are children of God. Member’s of God’s household. There will be a return of blessings when the believer meets the Lord. Peter put it this way:
8 To sum up, all of you be harmonious, sympathetic, brotherly, kindhearted, and humble in spirit;
9 not returning evil for evil or insult for insult, but giving a blessing instead; for you were called for the very purpose that you might inherit a blessing.
The giving of a blessing returns a blessing when the inheritance is received.
What’s interesting is that Peter put this right after he told husbands how they should treat their wives.
3. So what are some of the other relationships that each of us could find ourselves in on a daily routine?
a. Well, you have daily encounters with both believers and non-believers. In our encounters with believers and non-believers there should be no difference in how you act. Your witness as a slave of Christ Jesus should show in your actions. What’s truly in your heart if you act like a Christian for people who you know to be a believer and then act like a non-christian for people who you know to be non-believers. I think that’s what would be called hypocrisy. Shine the light of Christ before all men believer or not.
And what about your encounters with people who are older and younger than you? Well 1 Timothy 5:1-2 says:
1 Do not sharply rebuke an older man, but rather appeal to him as a father, to the younger men as brothers,
2 the older women as mothers, and the younger women as sisters, in all purity.
Treat those older than you as a mother or father and those younger as a sister or brother. Now of course do this within reason. If someone is only a few years older than you than treat them as if they are an older sibling. Well maybe, that’s depends on you treated you own siblings. If they are much older or much younger treat them as if they are grandparents or children.
Do you remember the term kurios? It is also a title of honor sometimes rendered “sir” and is expressive of the respect and reverence with which a son addresses his father - or mother. So treat the older with respect and reverence.
There are of course a lot of other relationships that we can find ourselves in on any given day.
b. Some of those other relationships could be:
You and the Government. What do you do then? Well Romans 13:1 says:
1 Every person is to be in subjection to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those which exist are established by God.
So be in subjugation to the government. God established it for our benefit. Even if it doesn’t seem that way.
So we are to be subject to the government, which means we are to follow the laws set forth by the government and they have given us lots of laws to follow. In fact there are so many laws that you can’t even know all of them. Crazy thing is that knowing all of the laws isn’t even necessary. Most of them apply only to those who do wrong. Romans 13:3 says:
3 For rulers are not a cause of fear for good behavior, but for evil. Do you want to have no fear of authority? Do what is good and you will have praise from the same;
So do good and not evil. However, don’t do good to please the government, do good to please the one who established the government to begin with. Do your good to please the one who is over all the governments, Christ Jesus.
But let’s say you have a hard time doing the right thing? What then? Well then you are going to have an encounter with the Law. At that point you get to have a relationship with law enforcement. Romans 13:4 says:
4 for it is a minister of God to you for good. But if you do what is evil, be afraid; for it does not bear the sword for nothing; for it is a minister of God, an avenger who brings wrath on the one who practices evil.
The sword that the government bears is law enforcement. There are consequences to breaking the laws, especially for those who do it continually. The best thing to do is to avoid a relationship with law enforcement by doing good.
One last relationship that all believers should have themselves in is a relationship with the church. Not the greater church of all believers through faith in Christ Jesus but a smaller local church. What then? What is that relationship like?
Within the church a term known as constituted authority is used for the governance of the church. Here is the definition of what this means as found in the manual of the Christian and Missionary Alliance.
STATEMENT ON THE DEFINITION OF CONSTITUTED AUTHORITY
The term “constituted authority” is a biblical concept (Romans 13:1) applied to organizational principles within The Christian and Missionary Alliance. While the term itself cannot be found in Holy Scripture, the principles by which Alliance churches govern themselves and their relationships to one another are rooted in God’s Word. These principles include, but are not limited to, such biblical ideas as servanthood (Matthew 23:11), submission to one another (Ephesians 5:21), and respect for and obedience to those who are over us in the Lord (1 Thessalonians 5:12, Hebrews 13:17 ).
The various constitutions, regulations, policies, procedures, and guidelines of The Christian and Missionary Alliance incorporate the biblical principle of constituted authority. They regulate relationships between churches as well as the relationships between denominational officers, district superintendents, and other licensed personnel in order to achieve The Christian and Missionary Alliance’s common goals and objectives in ministry. Therefore, those who serve Christ in The Christian and Missionary Alliance agree to do so in submission to these authorities and documents.
So according to this, the masters are to be servant leaders, not bosses who lord it over those who participate in the ministry of the church, and those that are not in a leadership role are to submit to those who are in positions of authority. Together we are to submit to one another as if to the Lord.
Exit: So Paul has described appropriate christian behaviors for those in a position of authority and those in a position of submission for a Parent-Child relationship and a Master-Slave relationship. Appropriate behavior for almost all the relationships in your life can be learned from these two basic relationships.
You were all children once and if your parents are still with you now that you are an adult then you are still in that same relationship. Whether you are older or younger you are constantly in or building relationships with those who are older or younger than yourself. Proper behavior within those relationship are learned through an appropriate Parent - Child relationship when you are younger.
And the Master - Slave relationship can teach appropriate behavior within most of the other relationships that you might find yourself in. Some possibilities could be a relationship with the church, the government, at work or any other business type relationship.
The biggest thing to remember is that you are to submit to one another and treat others as you would have them treat you.
Pray!
