"Behind the Pulpit: The Heart and Weight of a Pastor's Life"

"I recently came across a book titled Sifted, written by Wayne Cordeiro, Larry Osborne, and Francis Chan—three pastors who have walked the journey of ministry for many years. In the book, they were asked to describe the life of a pastor in just one word. Their collective answer? 'Pain.'*

That word might surprise some of you. It’s not the word we usually associate with the life of a pastor. You might think of words like 'faithful,' 'leader,' or 'shepherd.' But their answer, 'pain,' speaks to the reality that behind the pulpit, there’s a burden that pastors carry—often unseen, often misunderstood."

Sermon Outline: "The Heart of a Pastor"

Introduction: A Pastor’s Calling

"It was 2004, and I was just a quiet churchgoer at the time. One Sunday morning in a small Sunday school room, something happened that left a lasting impact on me. Out of nowhere, a lady from one of the prominent families in the church stood up and publicly berated our Sunday school teacher. She harshly condemned him for his past life as an alcoholic, declaring that he was unfit to teach because of it. She demanded that the class find another teacher, someone 'more suitable'—someone who hadn’t been through what he had.

I remember the moment vividly because this man had been my Sunday school teacher, and he had helped change my life. He was an inspiration to me. He poured himself into studying the lessons, teaching with accuracy, passion, and love. You could see how much he cared about what he was doing.

But that day, I witnessed the darker side of ministry. I watched as tears welled up in his eyes, his face flushing with the pain of public humiliation. The Sunday school class never fully recovered after that. Some people left, others stayed, but the damage had been done.

It was my first glimpse into the ugliness that can surface in ministry—the kind of hurt that lingers beneath the surface."

"The events of that day sparked something inside of me. Watching my brother in Christ be so harshly judged for his past ignited a desire to do something—to stand up for what I knew was right. This man, wrongly condemned, had experienced redemption, but it became clear to me that many Christians didn’t truly understand the heart of the gospel: identification, redemption, and salvation. It was then that I realized how many people in the church didn’t fully grasp what the gospel is really about.

So, I set off on a journey. I wanted to teach others about the love, grace, and forgiveness of Christ. I volunteered to teach a Sunday school class, and to my surprise, it quickly grew. God was moving in that classroom, and I could feel Him pulling me in the direction of ministry. It wasn’t long after that, in 2005, that an opportunity opened to serve as a youth pastor. I applied, and to my great joy, I got the job. My wife was supportive, and we were both amazed to see the transformation in the lives of the teenagers we served.

As I stepped into ministry, God continued to open doors. I began filling the pulpit whenever my pastor was away, and it was during one of those moments, as I stood downstairs preparing a sermon, that I felt God’s undeniable call on my life. It was clear—He was calling me to be more than a youth pastor. He was calling me to be a preacher, a pastor, a shepherd of His people."

"Soon after, I made my calling known to my pastor and the church. I enrolled in seminary, eager to deepen my biblical education and prepare for the road ahead. In 2010, I was called to serve at New Pleasant Baptist Church, where I spent three and a half years. But then, God called me to be the full-time pastor of a church on the West side of Spartanburg. I soon learned this would be an assignment filled with pain and tough lessons.

There are many moments from that time that I will never forget. One in particular still stands out. A visitor to our church had a daughter who was graduating high school, and since they had no church home, they asked if she could participate in our upcoming backyard service. I gladly said yes. But to my surprise, several women in the church opposed it. They argued that since this family wasn’t members, and since they didn’t 'pay their tithes,' they had no right to participate. Their words revealed a deeper issue I had only begun to see—the church had developed a 'country club' mentality, where acceptance depended on membership status and financial contributions.

Later, this mentality was painfully confirmed during a deacons' meeting. The chairman of the deacons looked me in the eye and said, 'This church will be fine without you or any other pastor. As long as we have a man to fill the pulpit, we can take care of all the needs of the church. We have enough money to keep the lights on, and we don’t need you.'

The writing was on the wall. It became clear that this was not the place for me. The church wasn’t seeking transformation or grace—they just needed a figurehead to preach. So I stepped out of that church, and God led me to plant a new one. A church that would be different. A place where people would be welcomed regardless of their past—a church that wouldn’t judge but would instead teach about the power of redemption, which is at the heart of God's plan for every person.

I wanted to create a place where people could come as they are, no matter where they’ve been or what they’ve done, meet Jesus, and be transformed by His love. A place where we could all learn to live according to His plan."

"In 2017, our church plant, Relevant Church Upstate, merged with Calvary Baptist Church. It was a remarkable thing to witness—two congregations, two different backgrounds, coming together to form one body. But within a year of the merger, the honeymoon period faded. Some of the people from Relevant were unhappy about joining forces with a more traditional church. Many families left, and it was a painful thing to experience as a pastor.

As the pastor of a merged church, I had to consider everyone—those from Relevant, those from Calvary, and the new people we were reaching. We couldn’t just coexist; we had to thrive together as one church, united by our mission to transform the community. But this wasn’t easy. Some people wanted more traditional hymns instead of contemporary songs, which I completely understood. After all, we were no longer just a church plant full of young people. We were now a church made up of people from all walks of life and all ages.

I made a genuine effort to blend the worship music, honoring both the traditions of Calvary and the more contemporary style we had brought from Relevant. But it wasn’t enough for everyone. Some felt that I was catering to one group and neglecting the other. One person, in particular, told me that I had lost my vision and that they could no longer follow my leadership. This person was a close friend, and their decision to leave cut me deeply.

Not long after that, we opened Calvary’s doors to a Ukrainian church in need of a place to meet. Initially, it seemed like a great opportunity to serve, but as time went on, I discovered that their doctrine and theology didn’t align with the biblical foundations of our church. After much prayer and deliberation, I had to make the difficult decision to ask them to leave. As a result, two families who were very dear to me left the church as well—families that included deacons who had faithfully served at Calvary.

I cannot adequately describe the pain a pastor feels when people they love choose to leave, especially under circumstances like these. It’s a unique heartache. You pray for these people, you pour into them, and then, suddenly, they’re gone. But I knew in my heart that asking the Ukrainian church to leave was the right decision. Their doctrine wasn’t aligned with Scripture, and as painful as it was, I had to stand firm on the truth."

"And then, there’s the pain of betrayal—something I have experienced far too often in ministry. As pastors, we pour our hearts into people. We invest in their lives, we walk with them through their darkest moments, and we celebrate their victories. We love them like family. But the reality is that sometimes, the very people we love and serve the most are the ones who turn against us.

I have faced this betrayal firsthand. People I trusted, people I thought were partners in ministry, have turned their backs on me. Some have spread rumors, while others have tried to tear down what we’ve built here at Calvary. And what hurts the most isn’t just the words or the actions—it’s the broken relationships. It’s the sense of loss when someone you’ve prayed with, worked alongside, and loved deeply decides to walk away.

I wish I could say that betrayal only happened once, but it’s been a recurring theme throughout my time in ministry. Each time it happens, it cuts deeper, making it harder to trust, harder to open up again. There have been seasons where I’ve wanted to retreat, to protect myself from more pain. But God’s calling doesn’t allow for that. He calls us to keep loving, to keep shepherding, even when it hurts.

And that’s the tension of ministry—carrying the pain of betrayal while still being called to love those who may hurt us. I’ve learned that forgiveness is not just a one-time act; it’s an ongoing process. I’ve had to release the bitterness and trust that God sees and knows everything. He is the ultimate judge, and He will handle things in His time."

Start by recounting your calling to ministry, how God drew you to serve as a pastor. Speak about the weight of the calling, emphasizing the responsibility that comes with shepherding a church. Share the joy and honor you've felt being in that role over the years.

Possible Intro Script:

"The life of a pastor is not just a profession; it’s a calling that grips the heart and soul. I have spent [x] years of my life pouring into this church and others because I believe God called me to serve, to lead, and to shepherd. But today, I want to take you behind the scenes of what that calling really looks like."

1. The Joy of Serving

Speak about the moments that have brought you immense joy as a pastor: baptisms, weddings, the spiritual growth of people, and seeing lives transformed by the Gospel. You might even highlight specific memories from your time at Calvary.Acknowledge the privilege of standing with people in life’s most significant moments, both in celebration and sorrow.

Possible Script:

"Some of my greatest joys in life have been standing with you, celebrating baptisms, praying over newborns, and watching people take their first steps of faith. These moments remind me of why I said 'yes' to this calling, and they will stay with me forever."

2. The Weight of Responsibility

Be honest about the burdens pastors carry. Talk about the pressure to always be "on," to always have the right answers, and the weight of caring for people spiritually, emotionally, and sometimes even financially.Mention how pastors often carry the struggles of others quietly, feeling the pressure to maintain strength even when they themselves are hurting.

Possible Script:

"But with the joy, there comes an enormous weight—a weight that sometimes feels overwhelming. As pastors, we carry not only our own burdens but also the struggles, the pain, and the heartaches of those we serve. We pray for you when you don't know it, we cry for you when you don’t see it, and we sometimes carry things silently because that's the role we’re called to play."

3. The Loneliness of Leadership

Address the isolation that often comes with pastoral leadership. Talk about how pastors sometimes struggle to find people to confide in, and how their own struggles are often kept hidden for fear of burdening others.Mention the feeling of betrayal or hurt, especially when people you’ve poured into leave or turn away.

Possible Script:

"One of the hardest truths to share is how lonely the role of a pastor can be. People may not realize it, but those who lead often feel the most alone. We sometimes struggle to find people we can trust, and when betrayal or hurt happens, it cuts deep. And yet, we push forward because that’s what we believe God has called us to do."

4. The Struggles Behind the Scenes

Be raw about the personal and spiritual struggles that pastors face. Share how the work of ministry can sometimes draw you away from your own spiritual growth and relationship with God.Talk about the burnout, exhaustion, and the toll ministry can take on family life and personal health.

Possible Script:

"Behind the scenes, there are struggles that many don’t see. Ministry can wear you down. I’ve had seasons where I’ve felt distant from God, not because I wanted to be, but because the demands of ministry left me exhausted and overwhelmed. My family has made sacrifices, and there are times I’ve wondered if I was enough—for them and for the church."

5. The Strength to Continue

Emphasize the grace of God that has sustained you throughout your pastoral journey. Share how, despite the hardships, it has always been God's strength that has carried you through.Reinforce that the church and its people are always in the hands of God, not just the pastor.

Possible Script:

"In all of this, I’ve learned one thing for certain: I am not enough on my own, but God is. His grace has carried me through the hardest days, and it’s His strength that will continue to sustain this church, even as I step into the next chapter of my life."

6. A Pastor’s Farewell

As you conclude, share your heartfelt gratitude for the congregation. Reassure them that you are confident in God's plan for both you and the church moving forward. Express the bittersweet emotions you feel about leaving, but also your excitement for what God will do next.

Possible Script:

"As I step away from this role, my heart is filled with both sorrow and hope. I am deeply grateful for each of you and for the way you’ve allowed me to be part of your lives. But I know that God’s plans are always bigger than mine, and I trust that He will continue to lead you into a bright future."

Closing Prayer

Pray over the congregation, asking God to continue to guide them, strengthen their faith, and bless the next season of leadership at Calvary.