Renewing Your Priorities 6

Prioritizing Your Family

Text: Deuteronomy 6:4-9

Introduction

As I have said many times, we live in a world where truth is described as a subjective reality. Even when it comes to stewarding our families. Parents have said, “I’ll decide what’s best for my family, you and decide what’s best for yours. However, the current path for most families I talk too is one that is constantly taking them to a point of exhaustion. That self inflicted exhaustion then bleeds over into your worship and walk with God.

Why is it so important to “rightly” prioritize your family? It is important because you are shaping how the next generation prioritizes their family.

Let me say this, “If how you currently prioritize your family takes away from your faithfulness to God, His church, His people and His teachings, then you are not prioritizing them well.”

Proverbs 18:22 “22 Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, And obtaineth favour of the Lord.”

Psalm 127:3 “3 Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord: And the fruit of the womb is his reward.”

How many of you will agree that life is a gift? How well are guarding the gifts God has entrusted you with?

Passage Context

Remember, the Jewish people are simply one big family. God has brought them out of slavery and has had them on a journey to become civilized and holy.

God knew that if His children did not have the proper foundation for their home, the promised land would evolve into any other land of idolatry. Their children would grow up without any truth about the real person of God and the heart He has for them.

Two pivotal principals from this chapter: Love & Obedience (one will never continue without the other)

You see, there is a pandemic within the Christian home today; “We will do our best to raise our family.” Folks, the power of your best is broken and not dependable. Instead of making a statement based upon the weakness of your flesh, we must reckon this truth in our hearts, “I will prioritize the family God has entrusted to me the way God has planned out for me for His glory.”

Let’s go ahead and make something very clear: Every family is broken! Until we realize that, we will keep on relying upon our own power and reasoning, not identifying the right enemy, fight against instead of fighting for one another, and even just walking away from it all.

What is the most powerful way to prioritize your family so there is balance, strength, love, and longevity?

1) Develop A Teachable Heart (v1-6)

Verses 4-9 are considered the central theme of Deuteronomy.

It sets a pattern that helps us relate the Word of God to our daily lives. We are to love God, think constantly about his commandments, teach his commandments to our children, and live each day by the guidelines in his Word. Life Application Bible Notes (Tyndale, 2007), 273.

However, what good can a teacher be to students who remain self-reliant and prideful?

A. (v1) “…the Lord your God has commanded to teach you…”

Notice verses 4-5

Moses begins by reminding them who is the teacher and who is the student. Who is the broken one and who is the perfect one. Who is the rebel and who is the deliverer. Who keeps His covenant and who breaks theirs.

Remember, this is a large family of broken families.

Has anything really changed for us who are the church?

Everyone of us need to be taught and learn from the Father who is over the family.

Everyone of you are broken and need the perfect one to teach you how to be a husband, wife, mom, dad, grandparent, etc.

What is usually the cause of the fights you have with your spouse?

Self-reliance, self-preservation, self-pity, ignorant of who the real enemy is, ignorant on how to fight for your spouse, ignorant on how to fight so your spouse can win, etc…

Do you realize who can teach you???

God and the spouse He gave you!

God commands us to love Him with our all—our heart, our soul (seat of emotions, passions, and appetites), and our might (energy and strength). If you want to turn your children’s hearts toward God, you must first have a personal walk with God that is real from your heart. Chappell, Paul. Stewarding Life: One Lifetime, Limited Resources, Eternal Priorities (p. 175). Striving Together Publications. Kindle Edition.

B. The early families of the church needed to be taught by God

Turn to the book of James

James 1:19–20 “19 Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath: 20 For the wrath of man worketh not the righteousness of God.”

James 4:1–3 “1 From whence come wars and fightings among you? come they not hence, even of your lusts that war in your members? 2 Ye lust, and have not: ye kill, and desire to have, and cannot obtain: ye fight and war, yet ye have not, because ye ask not. 3 Ye ask, and receive not, because ye ask amiss, that ye may consume it upon your lusts.

James 4:7–8 “7 Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. 8 Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. Cleanse your hands, ye sinners; and purify your hearts, ye double minded.”

You used to work out of an old toolbox to fight your battles. NOW, God has given you a whole new set of tools call “God’s Armor” in order to never give up and fight for one another going forward.

2) Develop An Understanding Of God’s Heart

Deuteronomy 5:29 “29 O that there were such an heart in them, that they would fear me, and keep all my commandments always, that it might be well with them, and with their children for ever!”

Deuteronomy 6:3 “3 Hear therefore, O Israel, and observe to do it; that it may be well with thee, and that ye may increase mightily, as the Lord God of thy fathers hath promised thee, in the land that floweth with milk and honey.”

“it may be well with thee” = having desirable qualities for a particular place (God’s perfect will for your life)

“increase mightily” = multiply in number

“in the land” = You will never fair well where God is taking you and your family if you fail to observe God’s commands for your family.

Deuteronomy 6:12 “12 Then beware lest thou forget the Lord, which brought thee forth out of the land of Egypt, from the house of bondage.”

When I think about bondage, I also think about how it was the power of the gospel that set me free from the bondage of sin.

Can a renewed focus on the gospel help us properly develop our hearts?

When humanity sinned against God, God engaged sacrificially to win them back to himself.

God has never been passive toward those who have offended Him.

God fought for humanity in a way where we can win and so can Him. This however comes with a cost for everyone, more so for God!

When your spouse sins against you, how are you engaging the situation?

Deuteronomy 6:18 “18 And thou shalt do that which is right and good in the sight of the Lord: that it may be well with thee, and that thou mayest go in and possess the good land which the Lord sware unto thy fathers,”

Illustration: James has turned into a professional screamer. We put him in a solitary place of timeout (you don’t get to enjoy the family while you are acting uncivilized). It came down to the point of me sitting across from him explaining that the only way for this future moments to go well for him is to yield to me. With my arms stretched out to receive him, he curled his body away from me in fear! Once I told him I was not there to hurt him but to help and love him, he lunged out of the chair into my arms!

3) Develop The Hearts Of Your Children

Quote: (Josh McDowell) “You can con a con, you can fool a fool, but you can’t kid a kid.”

Young people do not want something that their parents demonstrate to be of no value. Regardless of what you say with your mouth, your children are listening to what you say with your actions. If you instruct them to love God, but you have discarded your love for Him, your children are not likely to seek the Lord themselves. Chappell, Paul. Stewarding Life: One Lifetime, Limited Resources, Eternal Priorities (p. 175). Striving Together Publications. Kindle Edition.

Eternal truths are most effectively learned in the loving environment of a Godfearing home. Life Application Bible Notes (Tyndale, 2007), 273.

Often times when we think about “teaching about God” to our children, our minds go to the Sunday school class, youth group, etc.

None of those things existed in the days of Moses.

This tells you, while all discipleship programs in church are a good thing, they are not starting point nor the main way your children should be learning about God.

The classroom Moses is describing is that of everyday moments each family experiences together.

What can come from a home when loving God is modeled and His Word is taught?

2 Timothy 1:5–6 “5 When I call to remembrance the unfeigned faith that is in thee, which dwelt first in thy grandmother Lois, and thy mother Eunice; and I am persuaded that in thee also. 6 Wherefore I put thee in remembrance that thou stir up the gift of God, which is in thee by the putting on of my hands.”

2 Timothy 3:14–15 “14 But continue thou in the things which thou hast learned and hast been assured of, knowing of whom thou hast learned them; 15 And that from a child thou hast known the holy scriptures, which are able to make thee wise unto salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus.”

Parents (fathers especially) must conduct themselves in such a way that their children comply from the heart.

Quote: (Unkown) “It is the duty of the family to follow the leadership of a father, but the father must manifest such a character that this obedience would be rendered from the heart.”

Are you teaching/leading your children with a gentle spirit?