Work

Intro

When we first moved into a trailer, there was always little things to fix. Haven loves getting a tool out of her bag and helping dad.

Deep down in a child is the desire to be included in the work of the person who loves them. I love Haven. Haven loves me. And she desperately wanted to be invited into my work. In the story of God, we were made for work.

Genesis 2:2–3 “And on the seventh day God ended his work which he had made; and he rested on the seventh day from all his work which he had made. And God blessed the seventh day, and sanctified it: because that in it he had rested from all his work which God created and made.”

What does the Bible say God did the first six days of creation? WORK. God himself worked.

Is it any wonder, that since God made man in His own image, He would also give man work to do?

Genesis 2:15 “And the Lord God took the man, and put him into the garden of Eden to dress it and to keep it.”

In other words, God gave Adam work to do.

Why is work so spiritually important!? Because it gives us purpose and meaning. And that is a gift.

Notice all these verses came before sin entered the world. Which reminds us that work was not part of the punishment of sin, it was a gift long before sin entered into the world. Part of the punishment for sin meant that man would sweat and struggle while fulfilling his purpose and his work.

Since work is so spiritually important, it should mean that we must form our children with a deep understanding that God created us to work along side Him and to enjoy the purpose that work gives us.

In order to do this, we practice three habits - Habits of talking about work, Habits of inviting them into the work of the household, Habits of letting them see the work outside the household.

Habits of talking about work

The other day, I was heading to work and I said goodbye to my kids and Harmony responded with, I don’t like when you leave for work. And I had to have the surprisingly difficult conversation of explaining to Harmony why I went to work and left them at home.

It’s hard enough to explain to ourselves what work is and why we do it. So practicing habits of language helps them and really reminds us what the “big-picture” story of work is.

Here are some examples:

“Why do you have to go to work today?” I get to go to work—which I’m actually really thankful for. Because God made us all to work. Some people don’t have a job they like, and some don’t have a job at all. Work is a blessing. “What do you do at work?” Just like God helps people, at work I get to help people by . . . Just like God created the world, at work I get to create things, like . . . Just like the Bible tells us to serve other people, at work I get to serve other people by . . . “Why do we have to do chores?” Just like God organized the world and made it a good place for us to live, it’s our job to keep our house organized so it’s a good place for us to live.

They will have many other questions, but remember these are seeds that we are planting. These conversations unfold over decades.

When work is a burden rather than a blessing:

In unemployment, we might say: “God made us to work, so one of the reasons Mom/Dad is so sad right now is that they don’t have a job to go to. It’s sad like being really good at riding bikes, but not having one to enjoy it.” In underemployment, we might say: “God made us with special talents and tells us to use them, so one of the reasons Mom/Dad is so sad right now is that their job doesn’t use their talents.” In hard times of overwork, we might say: “Just like God works and then rests, one of the reasons it is so hard for Mom/Dad right now is that their job is not letting them rest, and good rest is just as important as good work.”

Habits of inviting them into the work

If they are going to learn work, they need to be regularly invited into the work of the house.

This is inevitably messier than it is helpful, at least at first. But how else will they come to understand the satisfaction of a job well done? How will they come to understand the dignity of the work a stay-at-home parent performs?

The tough parts about putting kids to work in the house are many and obvious—they mess it up, they complain, they are slow, they need to be constantly monitored, and sometimes you’d much rather just turn on a screen and say, “Fine, I’ll clean it up, just don’t bother me while I do it.” All true and all understandable.

But here are some of the less noticed benefits of regularly inviting children into the work of the house.

Unique Quality Time

If you ask Malerie what one of ther best memories were growing up, she would tell you it was when her mom asked her to go to the grocery store with her. She would go and help her mom choose, bag, and load up groceries. If you asked her why is that such a good memory, she would tell you, because I got to spend some one on one time with my mom. I didn’t have to compete for my mother’s attention.

We Need the Help

Parents have alot to do, so our kids shouldn’t be adding to that list of things to do. There are some things our kids can actually do better than us, i.e. sorting clothes.

Teaching them the Satisfaction of Work

The other day I was working on the brick outside and Malerie and the girls were inside making cookies. First off, the kids love to be invited into this kind of work. But after the cookies were done, Malerie had Haven bring out a warm cookie and a cup of milk to me. You should have seen the joy and satisfaction on Haven’s face. She was grinning from ear to ear when she did that. Weather she realized it or not, she was learning the satisfaction of work.

Teaching Them That Rhythms of Order Are Fundamental to Everything

The best behaved kids are ones that have their life organized around nap and meal times. Kids that are absent of established mealtimes, and rest times, are grumpy and hangry much more than they need to be. But even as kids grow up they, need to understand there is joy in order.

Some of you already do a great job at this. I know Liz has told me before that when her kids wake up they have to do two things, read their Bible and make up their bed. I was talking to Shiloh’s girls a few weeks ago and they told me that before they start school in the morning they have to work out. And what surprised me is that as a teenager, Shiloh had taught them that working out was part of their routine in the morning.

Teaching Them the Fun Inherent in Communal Work

Stuffing envelopes in college, one of the funnest “work” I’ve ever done, not because of the work, but because of who I was doing the work with.

Teaching Them What Words Can’t

Digging out a sand pit when I worked at the school. Someone pushed me harder than I knew I could go. Nothing else has ever been that hard. Every other day of work was easy compared to those three days of intense hard manual labor.

I needed to experience that hard work, in order for me to realize that I could do more than what my mind told me I could.

Habits of Letting Children See the Work outside the Household

My kids love coming to work with dad. Partly because gym equipment is so intriguing to a young kid. They slide down the decline bench, and build forts with the foam box jumps. They get on the rower and ride the seat back and forth. But if they watch closely, they will see me help customers, serve members, and build up employees.

We are created to love our neighbors, and that, almost certainly, the primary way we love our neighbors is through our daily work, whether in the house or outside of the house. Allowing our kids to see our work outside the house, allows them to see “loving our neighbors” in action.

my kids getting to help smooth out concrete in front of our house.

Try to help your kids to understand what you do by talking about it more frequently.

As you pass by work, genuinely admire it and point out to your kids the handiwork of it.

The Pleasure of working along side the one you love

What if work wasn’t about just about getting things done as quickly as possible? What if it were far more spiritual than that? what if it were about making us more like our Heavenly Father? or finding pleasure in the gift that he gave us? or about working along side the one that loves us. Work is a gift, and by inviting our kids into it, we teach them the joy of work.