This is What Love Looks Like

Introduction

Brothers and sisters, one of the things that we understand in the Reformed tradition is that we are sinners. And not only that we are sinners, but we are totally depraved. We are fallen in our intellect, in our affections, in our bodies, and spiritually. This may seem like a weird way to begin a sermon during Advent, but it is important for us, as a sinful people to have a proper understanding of ourselves before we can even begin to have a right understanding of God and His actions towards us.

One of the things that we seem to misunderstand in our current cultural context is the definition of what love is. What is love? Our culture has a definition of love that is self-centered and emotional. I find this demonstrated in our culture in terms of being “in-love” with someone. This is almost purely an emotional, romantic type of approach to relationships. Love is also seen in being accepting of almost anything that someone chooses to do. The picture of love that is promulgated in the world is very different from the picture of love that we see in the revelation of God…the Bible.

What is love? Our passage this morning from 1 John 4 presents a picture of love that is quite a contrast to that which surrounds us in our day. In relationships love is presented as doing what feels “loving” to us in our actions towards another person. Perhaps a clearer way is to say that being “in love” is solely our perspective towards another person depending on how they are responding and acting towards us. If that man or woman is doing the things that make us feel warm and fuzzy, then the “in-love” feeling continues. The struggle of the modern-day marital relationship is how to keep those feelings going. And all too often, when those feelings go, the relationship ends.

We have the same perspective towards nonromantic relationships as well. We interpret love as being non-offensive to another person. We are reluctant to address the horrible things that the person may be doing…even if it is the way of death. It’s the idea that “If I feel uncomfortable or unloving about saying something to someone then I must be unloving.” I wonder how much of that the Apostle Peter was thinking about when he confronted his own people in Acts 2 and 3 with the ungodly murder of Jesus. I don’t think he was worried about being offensive. Or how about the Apostle Paul in Acts 17, when he told the men in Athens that all their gods of gold, silver, and stone were an example of their ignorance from which they were to repent.

All religions have some idea of the importance of love. Christianity stresses the importance of love because God has revealed that he is love. Love is both what God is and what he has done; God always acts in love.

Love is a transitive reality—that is, it requires an object. In the Bible, love is described as personal (between persons) and selfless (desiring the best for others). Christians see God’s love in sending his Son to die on the cross to save sinners. Christians are to be known by the fact that they love God and others. Their love is not to be like the love the world has. Love is best seen in action and in most cases is to be identified with what we do—in our compassion and commitment to those around us, regardless of the object’s virtue. Our loving attitudes and behavior are to reflect God’s love. Jesus said that only two commands are needed to govern our lives: love of God and love of neighbor. If such love is demonstrated, all the law and prophets are fulfilled.[1]

Dearly Beloved, we will act according to how we think about things. The things that we believe are to be derived from the pages of God’s revelation to us, not from the fads of the culture around us. And so, I want us to look at our passages in 1 John 4 and Philippians 2 under the theme, “This is what love looks like.” We will see love as an action of bringing life, an action of self-sacrifice, and an action of abiding fellowship.

An Action of Bringing Life (vs. 9)

When we contemplate Advent, we all think about the little babe in Bethlehem. We think about the Christmas story, the shepherds, the wise men, and Joseph and Mary. It is a beautiful story of the humility of God’s Son as He entered into the world…a world of darkness, sin, and brokenness.

Our passage we read in Philippians 2 illustrates what God’s action of love towards us is. “In your relationships with each other, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus.” The mind of Christ is one of humility. The Creator became one of His creatures. The exalted King of the Universe joins Himself to human nature…the same nature that rebelled against Him. And all this was done with a purpose. It was done with the purpose of bringing life to you and me who otherwise are destined for death and destruction.

1 John 4:9 states, “This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him.” It should be very humbling for us to recognize that the babe in Bethlehem is the Bringer of Life, or as Peter says in Acts 3, the Author of Life. The manger in Bethlehem cradled Life incarnate.

This is what love looks like. True love seeks life for its object. If you read through the Gospels, you will find that the presence of Jesus itself was very offensive. Darkness is always offended by Light. Death finds itself conquered when Life makes its appearance. The love of God is seen in verse 9 as an intention to bring the greatest blessing to its object. Dearly beloved, the love of God was not conditional upon our cleanliness, but rather God’s loves His people with an everlasting love. His love will not be turned aside for He will accomplish all that He has ordained for His Beloved.

How many of us pattern our understanding of love in this way? Do we seek to bring the life of God into our relationships. Are we more concerned with offending others than bringing them to the author of life? True love is focused on its object, not on itself. Isn’t this wonderful for us? God is the offended one, yet He became One of us to bring us life.

As husbands and wives, how often is our love focused on how our spouse makes us feel? It is one thing to have feelings of love because of how another person makes us feel. It is something else to set our affections upon the companion God has given us and to love that person regardless of their imperfections and even their offenses. I believe that if husbands and wives together looked upon their spouses with godly affection instead of through the lens of fallen emotional impulses, we’d find ourselves filled with much greater contentment and happiness and less strife and divorce. We should be living for God by actions of love to direct them to the Lord and Giver of Life.

An Action of Self-sacrifice (vs. 10)

Not only does God’s actions of love bring life, but God’s action of love is one of self-sacrifice, Verse 10, “This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.”

In Philippians 2:8 we read, “And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death – even death on a cross.” This is probably one of the hardest actions of love that Christ performed for us that we are called to imitate. Jesus was born as the babe in Bethlehem for the purpose of living a righteous life and then to die a horrible death. All this for you and for me.

Jesus died for those who hated him! This depth of love is almost unfathomable! What would make an innocent and righteous man willing to undertake rejection, mockery, beating, and crucifixion for those who hated him? Yet we are to have the same mindset as Christ Jesus…

In a modern American culture that faces so little sacrifice, this is almost a lost concept. We have a storm, lose power, and totally freak out. Yet there are hundreds of millions around the world who don’t have electrical power at all at any time. We wail and moan when our preferred political candidate does not win the election. Billions of people around the world have no choice at all. In western culture, we have what is called newspaper eschatology. We bemoan how horrible it is in our country. We have borders where tens of millions of people are dying to get into this “horrible” country. We have little concept of sacrifice.

You know what…God the Son was enthroned in glory and chose to endure sacrifice for us. It did not come to Him. He went to it. That is what love is…the one who loves is willing to sacrifice for the object of their love, even themselves. To show true love means sacrificing our reputation…Jesus was associated with Satan by the religious leaders of His day…He was mocked on the cross. Speaking the truth about Jesus Christ and Scripture will get Christians mocked. It will get us called all sorts of names. Yet this is love, God the Father sent His Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.

I want to spend a moment discussing what an atoning sacrifice for sins is. If you are familiar with the Old Testament, you will remember the various types of sacrifices. There was the burnt offering, the sin offering, as well as others. The atonement of Jesus Christ is where the blood of his sacrifice on the cross covers over your sins. The love of God towards you and me is to provide a way through Jesus so that when God the Father sees you and me, he sees the sacrifice of His Son, not the filth of our sin. We can stand in the presence of the Father with no guilt or condemnation.

Why would God do this? I don’t know…the Scripture says it is because of His own good pleasure. We are to accept this act of love…this mindset of Christ Jesus and to seek ways to live it out. Self-sacrifice for the benefit of others, not ourselves.

An Action of Abiding Fellowship (vs. 12)

The final action of God’s love towards us we find in verse 12, “No one has ever seen God, but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us.” This is God’s action of abiding fellowship.

Earlier in 1 John, the Apostle speaks about our ongoing sin that we commit as believers. In chapter 1, we read, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” I want us to stop here and ponder for a moment. We are sinners, yet the righteous God lives in us, sinners, and his love is made complete in us. As we read throughout the epistle of 1 John, the Apostle teaches us that as we are filled with God’s love, so also that love overflows to our fellow brothers and sisters.

This is the marvelous love of God! He chooses to dwell in peace, without condemnation and with constant forgiveness, within each one of us who call upon the name of the Lord. He directs us towards righteousness and sanctifies His people so that his love is made complete in us.

In the Old Testament, God dwelt in the tabernacle and the temple. God’s Spirit would come upon certain of His people at specific times and for specific purposes, but it was in a building. Yet in Christ, we see that the greater purpose of God’s is to be a God among His people. His purpose is intimate fellowship and communion. We find in Christ that the dwelling place of God is within and among His people, not in buildings. The time of tabernacles and temples has passed in the coming of Christ.

The One who was filled with the Spirit without measure has blessed us with that same Spirit to dwell in our hearts. He assures us of His love and enables us to know and experience the peace that passes all understanding.

One of the commitments that we see in the Incarnation of the Son is the everlasting purpose of God to dwell among us. The union of the divine and human natures in Jesus Christ is an unending union. This shows the unending love of God to each of us who trust in Jesus Christ this morning. It also shows us the purpose of God that we would be like Him. Verse 12 speaks of his purpose to make His love complete in us. This is the work of the Holy Spirit in transforming our mind so that the mindset of Jesus Christ will become ours…that the old nature that does not understand or practice self-sacrificing love would die and arising in its place is life, self-sacrifice, and abiding fellowship.

Conclusion

Beloved children of our Father in heaven, the coming of Jesus Christ as the son of Mary…born as the babe in Bethlehem is an earth-shattering event. It demonstrates how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ. It shows to us what real love looks like. The love that God patterns to us is not the way of loving that the world demonstrates. The world’s understanding of love is essentially self-centered. It loves people as long as they do what makes us feel loved. But the love of God in Jesus Christ is a love that overcomes death. It is a love that sacrifices for those who are not worthy. It is a love that walks and talks in fellowship with sinners.

This is the type of love that we are called to show forth. It is a personal love that acts. Don’t confuse love with the emotions and acceptance of evil that the world does. Rather love truly, love deeply. Remember that Christ loves you such that He confronts you with the sin in your life that leads you to death, and calls you to repent and have life in Him. Christ’s love to us was to sacrifice himself on the cross so that our sins would be covered and we would have peace with God. The sanctifying love of God is fellowship with Him in peace for all eternity.

In your relationships with each other, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus…for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose. AMEN.

[1] Galaxie Software, 10,000 Sermon Illustrations (Biblical Studies Press, 2002). Paraphrased