Parents and Children Col. 3:20-21

Encouragement and obedience

Colossians 3:20–21 “Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord. Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.”

Paul turns from the Christian wife and husband and dedicates the next portion of his letter to parents and children.

The normal result of marriage is the bearing of children, children were meant to be born into christian homes filled with love and submission.

“Be fruitful and multiply” (Gen.1:28) was the original order to the first parents. This was before sin even entered the world.

-The marriage relationship and the bearing of children are not sinful rather, they are part of God’s mandate to man.

In being fruitful, husband and wife share in the creative activity of God.

Ideally, children would be born into dedicated christian homes and mature in the “nurture and admonition of the Lord” (Eph. 6:4).

What if all children had godly parents to teach them the Word of God and discipline them in love?

-Some how in modern society we have turned over authority to children. We have relinquished children of their responsibility to obey.

They are to “obey in everything” and not just the things that please them.

- Will a parent ask a child to do something wrong? Not, if the parents are submitted to the Lord and to one another, and not if they love each other and their children.

A child that does not learn to obey his parents is is not likely to grow up obeying any authority. He will defy teachers, the police and anyone else in authority. The reason we see so much disrespect in society is because we see so much in the home.

“Children to not create problems; they reveal them”

undisciplined parents typically produce undisciplined children. If the parents aren’t under authority themselves, they can’t exercise authority over others. Parents that submit to each other and the Lord are able to exercise properly balanced spiritual and physical authority over their children.

The measure of the child’s obedience is “all things,” and the motive is to please the Lord. it is possible to please the parents and not please the Lord, if the parents are not yielded to the Lord.

If the family resides in a garden of love and truth, reads the Word of God, and prays together; they will have an easier time discovering God’s will and pleasing the Lord.

“Fathers” (v.21) could be translated as “parents” as in Hebrews 11:23 “By faith Moses, when he was born, was hidden for three months by his parents, because they saw that the child was beautiful, and they were not afraid of the king’s edict.”

Paul is making clear that parents must make it as easy as possible for children to obey. “provoke not your children” (v.21).

We often automatically say “no” to children when they ask for something. We should be listening and evaluating each request. “leaning our ear” toward the petition.

Parents often change their minds and create problems for their children.

Parents do not spend enough time with our children. It is an encouragement to children when parents take time to be with them, to listen. Sometime you just have to listen and love!

Life is not easy for children, especially Christian children. Even when problems seem small to us, they are quite large to them.

Christian parents must listen carefully, share the feelings and frustrations of their children, pray with them, seek to encourage them.

Home should be the happiest and best place in all the world. a regular Eden.

Discouraged children are easy targets for satan and the world. when a child does not get edification at home, he will seek it elsewhere.

Christian parents must help their children develop their personalities, their gifts and skills.

Parents sometimes use their children s weapons against one another.

Parents sometime take out their frustration with the other parent on the child.

The Christian home should be a place of harmony and encouragement; strength and growth.The home should be a place that helps a child to trust God and want to live for Him.

Masters and Servant: honesty and devotion (3:22-4:1)

At the time of this letter, Slavery was an established institution. There were sixty million people in the Roman Empire. Many of them were well educated people who carried great responsibilities in the homes of the wealthy. To help in educating and disciplining the children were part of the responsibilities of these slaves.

Why didn’t the church of that day openly oppose slavery and seek to abolish it?

Minority group without political power to change an institution built into the social order.

Paul instructed Christian slaves to secure their freedom if they could (1 Cor.7:21) but he did not call for rebellion or overthrowing the existing order.

Remember, the purpose of the early church was to spread the gospel and win souls, not to get involved in social action. Had they been deemed as anti-government it would have greatly hindered soul winning and church expansion.

In these times we can not be so preoccupied with the honesty and morality in government that we forget our mandate to go into all the world and preach the gospel.

Remember that this Colossian letter was one of three that Paul had written. The others were Ephesians and Philemon. The letter to Philemon revels Paul’s attitude toward slavery.

Paul did advise Philemon to treat his slave harshly, but to receive him as a brother even though he was still a slave. Onesimus was one of the men that had delivered this letter to Colossae (vs 4:9).

A christian servant owed complete obedience to his master as a ministry of the Lord. If a Christian servant had a believing master, the servant was not to take advantage of his master because they were brothers in the Lord.

If anything, the servant should strive to do a better job because he was a Christian. His work should be done heartily, not grudgingly, and as to the Lord and not to men. “Ye serve the Lord Christ” (vs. 3:24).

It is all about the positive of obedience. Servants were to obey to please God, not just to avoid punishment. Even if the master did not commend them, they would have their reward from the Lord. Conversely, if they disobeyed , the Lord would deal with them even if their master did not.

God is no respecter of persons (Acts 10:34; Rom.2:11; Eph. 6:9;James 2:1-9)

We do not haves slaves in modern society but these principles apply to any kind of honest employment.

A Christian worker ought to be the best worker on the job. He ought to obey orders and not argue. He ought to follow instructions. He ought to serve Christ and not the boss only. If he follows these principle, he will receive his reward from Christ even if his earthly master(boss) don't recognize or reward him.

In the current world it is hard to imagine being on a job and obeying God. He must trust God no matter the circumstance and trust Him for what he needs.

Unsaved co-workers may try to take advantage of a believer, but it is also an opportunity to for the lost to see God in action.

Just as husbands and wives and parents and children have mutual and reciprocal responsibilities. Christian masters had the responsibility to treat their servants with fairness and honesty. This would be new to Roman culture. Servants were know as “things” not people.

The gospel did not immediately destroy slavery, but it did gradually change the relationship between slave and master. Social standards and pressures disgreed with Christian ideals, but the Christian master was to practice those ideals just the same. He was to treat his slave like a brother in Christ (Gal. 3:28). A christian slave was a free man in the Lord, and the master was a slave to Christ.

For us, our social and physical relationships must always be governed by our spiritual relationships.

Once again we see the preeminence of Christ. This section admonishes us to a practical application of Colossians 3:17 “And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.”

Parallel teaching can be found in Ephesians 5:18-6:9

Again Ephesians emphasizes being filled with the Spirit and Colossians emphasizes being filled with the Word. The end results are the same: Joyful, thankful, and submissive living.

The heart of every problem is the problem of the heart. Only God’s Spirit and God’s Word can change and control the heart.